Relationship Goals Week 2: Mission Driven

Music.

And now, here's Pastor Jeff's message, mission-driven.

And I felt like the Lord wanted me just to bring this passage to you.

This isn't our message. This is bonus. You're welcome.

Psalm 51. It's a prayer that David is praying, and it's a prayer of restoration,

and it's a prayer of confession.

And this is what David prayed he says be gracious to me God according to your faithful love,

you see God's grace is never about my character God's grace is never about my

abilities or my actions he says be gracious to me according to your faithful

love according to your abundant compassion,

blot out my rebellion.

Verse 2, he says, completely wash away my guilt and cleanse me from my sin.

For I am conscious, I am conscious of my rebellion. How many of you,

whatever you've been through this week, I know you're conscious of your shortcomings.

You're conscious of the places you've fallen short. I know that I am.

And so we acknowledge it before him this morning. And then it says,

my sin is always before me.

And then in verse four, David says, against you, you alone, I've sinned.

You see all sin, whether it's against our spouses or our children or against

co-workers or against our neighbors all sin is against God isn't it and then

he says God you're right when you pass sentence on me when you judge me you

are blameless for being the judge.

Music.

Verse 7, I'm going to skip down. It says, Purify me with hyssop, and I will be clean.

Wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.

Let me hear joy and gladness. And maybe you're here this morning,

and you just need some joy.

Maybe you just need some gladness.

Let the bones you have crushed rejoice you feel crushed this morning you feel

a little bit broken you feel like life is heavy,

we're going to cry out to him and we're going to ask him to return that joy,

and to return that gladness,

verse 12 restore the joy of your salvation to me sustain me by giving me a willing

spirit then i will teach the rebellious your ways and sinners will return to you,

lord open my lips verse 15 says and my mouth would declare your praise,

you don't just want a sacrifice where I would give it you're not pleased with

just burnt offerings in other words you're not just pleased by the things that

we do with the things that we can give no here's where it's at,

the sacrifice pleasing to God is a broken spirit how many of you have a broken spirit this morning.

Music.

He says, you will not despise a broken and humbled heart, God.

So wherever you find yourself this morning, whether it's on a mountaintop or

if it's in a valley, or maybe you're doing great, or maybe you're just struggling.

Maybe you've been sick all week like me, and you just didn't even feel like getting out of bed.

God wants to restore you but he wants to do it from a place of brokenness,

a place of humility where you fully rely and you fully understand the weight of your sin,

and that we just need Jesus,

so would you pray with me we're going to jump into this message,

But let's ask the Lord to do what only he can do, and that's to meet us where we're at.

So, Heavenly Father, we come to you and we ask, you know where each of my friends are today.

You know where their emotions are, where their minds are, where their spirits

are, whether they're joyful or whether they're broken.

Music.

Would you please move in this place and would you please touch us,

we want to be more like you we are so well aware that we are wicked and we are

fallen and we fail and we need you,

we need you for this week we need you for this day I need you for this minute.

And would you restore the joy of our salvation today?

Don't let anyone walk out of this place without joy restored to their countenance.

You are the lifter of our hearts.

So we ask that you would lift them today. In Jesus' precious name.

And all God's people said, amen. Well, I got some good news and bad news.

That is really short.

The bad news is I forgot to charge my iPad, so it could die any minute.

And also the bad news is I've been sick all week, so I could die any minute.

So this sermon will go as long as my iPad or my life is still alive.

Some of you are like, oh man, I prayed hard for a short sermon.

It's Super Bowl Day. I know your prayers might've been answered.

We've been talking about relationship goals and having a godly marriage and godly relationships.

Last week, we talked about the fact that whatever is at the center of our lives,

it's going to drive, it's going to affect our values and our beliefs,

and that's going to affect our actions.

You can always know what's at the center of someone's life because it affects

their attitudes, their actions, their habits, and their impact.

I've talked to a lot of couples over the years who have come to me and said

they want to get married and I'm excited for them. And then I say, why?

And, oh, well, every time around them, I just get butterflies or,

oh, they just complete me.

You know, it's just all this lovey-dovey and they just make me happy.

And I have to say, you know what? I don't think that's a good enough reason

because happiness is based on your happenings and happiness,

happiness comes and goes.

But the foundation of a godly marriage isn't happiness.

The foundation of a godly marriage is unity.

Unity. It's unity. Now, happiness may be the byproduct of a unified marriage.

And so you can have happiness in all of your relationships, whether you're single

or whether you're married or whether you're divorced, your friendships, everything.

Happiness comes and goes.

And the big idea that I want you to remember today, if you remember anything

at all, is that marriage is a mission-driven partnership.

It's a unity. It's a partnership designed by God to reflect Christ's love as

we live out God's purpose for us to the glory of God.

That's what marriage is for.

There's a mission that God has given us with marriage, and we are to reflect

Christ's love in our relationships, in our friendships, in our families,

and it's all for the glory of God.

Everything you say, everything you do is supposed to be done for the glory of

God, whether that's working at Caribou or running the football or driving a big rig.

Whatever you do is supposed to be done for the glory of God.

It's a mission-driven partnership.

If you have your Bibles, look at Genesis 1 with me. We started there last week.

We're going to be in verses 27 and 28, and it says this, So God created man in his own image.

He created him in the image of God. He created them male and female.

God blessed them and said to them, Be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth,

and subdue it. rule the fish of the sea, the birds of the sky,

and every creature that crawls on the earth.

Now, you need to know that everything you read in Scripture teaches us doctrine.

It teaches us truths that need to be applied to our everyday life.

And so I want to walk through these verses for just a few minutes,

and I want to pull out some biblical doctrines, because whether you know it

or not, the life you live is based on the theology that you believe and the

doctrine that you believe.

It's what we talked about last week. Whatever is at the center of your life.

Verse 27 starts out, so God created man in, say it with me, his image, his own image.

God created man in his own image. Now, some people may say that God is not male

or that God is not female or that he's neither or that he's genderless.

Some say he's a mother figure out there. There was a super popular movie among

Christians a few years ago called, it was a book first, and then they made it

into a movie. Remember the shack?

Great story. Absolutely great story. Do you remember how they pictured God as a big woman?

Listen, God is distinctly male. That's what his word says.

There is even Bibles now that have taken the masculinity of God out of Scripture.

And if you have one of those, you need to throw it away.

God created man in his own image. Scripture continues.

It's so awesome because it's like he's just driving this home.

He, he, he, he, he created him, talking about Adam.

He, God created him in the image of God. God never said anything was created

in his image until the creation of mankind. Isn't that incredible?

But here it says he created us in the very image of God.

He's given us divine attributes, rationality, morality, relational attributes.

We've got a soul and a mind, and he created us with emotions.

Were given dominion over all of the rest of creation.

It says he created them male and female.

You can get mad at me all you want. You can send me a text or a hate email,

but there's no exceptions.

God created two genders, male and female.

And since he is the only one that is able to create, there are not going to be any other genders.

This is God's word. It's not mine. So don't get mad at me.

Take it up with God. Verse 28 starts, and then God blessed them.

What does that mean that he gave them a blessing? He gave them a blessing.

In the Old Testament, the blessing was a concept that implied empowerment and favor.

Empowerment and favor. In Genesis 28, God is about to give the commands to Adam and Eve.

But before he does that, I'm saying, I'm putting this blessing on you so that

you'll be empowered to do what I've asked you to do.

And I'm giving you favor to accomplish the purpose at hand.

And God, it's the same thing today as it was back then.

Listen, God never calls you to do something He's not going to empower you to do.

If you're in school today and you're just, God's allowed you to have that opportunity.

Listen, I know it's not fun, but guess what? It is a blessing to be able to

go to school and to learn to read and to learn to write and to have knowledge.

It is a blessing, and God will empower you wherever you find yourself at today. He has empowered you.

And so by blessing humanity, God is providing them with the means and the authority

to fulfill the commands that follow. Now, here comes the commands.

And God said to them, be fruitful, multiply, and fill the earth. What's he saying?

Go have lots of kids, right? Have lots of families.

Fill up this world. Be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth, and subdue it.

Rule the fish of the sea, the birds of the sky, and every creature that crawls on the earth.

God blessed them, and he said, be fruitful, multiply, and subdue it.

In other words, the very first thing that God said to Adam and Eve was,

here is your mission if you so choose to accept it, right?

You're going to be fruitful. You're going to multiply, subdue, and rule over the earth.

It's so interesting to me that the very first thing that God says to the very

first couple is that you have a mission, right?

The very last thing that Jesus said before he ascended to heaven, what did he say again?

I have a mission for you. This time it's go into all the world and preach the

gospel, make disciples,

baptizing in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit,

teaching them to do everything that my Father commanded them to do.

You and I have a mission. Why should we get married?

Because we can serve God better together than we can apart, hopefully.

Now, Paul says, now, that's not always the case, But for most of us,

we will accomplish more for God with a partner cheering us on,

holding our hands, doing it.

I'm so grateful. I can't imagine trying to be obedient to the call of planting

a church without my wife, Jen.

I mean, I couldn't do it.

But yet the very first thing is you have a mission. Now, if you skip over to

the next chapter in Genesis 2, verse 24, tells us why a man leaves his father

Genesis 2:24

and his mother and is joined together in marriage.

In verse 24 of chapter 2, it says, this is why a man leaves his father and mother

and bonds with his wife, and they become, say it with me, one flesh. One flesh.

What does God want to do? God wants to unite us. The Jewish word here is kiddashin.

It refers to a Jewish ritual of sanctification and consecration in the context of marriage.

And basically, if you have two sheets of paper and you rub glue on both of them,

and then you seal them together.

It is a picture of marriage. What was two is now one.

Kiddashin, it's now one. You can't tear it apart.

What happens when you take those two and you glue them together and they become

one and then you try to rip them apart? What happens?

They tear. They pull apart. You never are able to fully take that one piece

of paper off or that other piece. There's going to be pieces on both sides.

They're going to be ripped and they're going to be torn apart.

God desires for us to be united in one flesh, husbands and wives.

And you better realize that what God seeks to unite, the devil schemes to divide.

How many of you realize that the devil is after your marriage?

The devil is after your relationships. The devil wants to bring disunity.

God wants to unite. The enemy wants to divide.

The enemy comes in Genesis in the form of a serpent.

And the enemy, the force of darkness, wants to disrupt their perfect relationship with God.

Satan wants to distract them from their divine mission. And he wants to destroy their unity.

So what does the serpent do? So what God wants to unite, the devil wants to divide.

The first thing the serpent does is he separates Eve from Adam.

Eve, come over here.

Did God really say? You're not supposed to eat from that fruit of that tree. Did God really say?

And the first thing the serpent did was got Eve to question the very word of

God, which by the way, is still the way that he tempts us and he tries to seek and destroy us.

He tries to get into our lies by saying, did God really say?

You shouldn't sleep together. Did God really say? You need to go to church. Did God really say?

You have to be in the word. You have to know the word so that you can combat

and have a reply against the enemy when he says, did God really say?

It's interesting also, they play the blame game, didn't they?

Eve blamed his wife. It's this woman you gave me. Hey, you gave her to me.

And what did the woman say? Well, it was the serpent that you created.

And we still do the same thing. We always somehow, for some reason,

always play the blame game.

So we've seen that the two will become one flesh. We've seen that what God unites,

the devil schemes to divide.

And so in marriage, just like anywhere else, we have to be united in mission.

You have to be united in mission. Amos 3 says, can two walk together except they be agreed?

Can two walk together except they be agreed? In other words,

can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction that they're walking?

Do we agree? Do we come together in agreement? Are we moving in the same direction in our lives?

Young people, this is so important.

When you're determining who you want to date or who you feel that God is leading you to.

Start serving God now. Do the things that we talked about this last week.

Don't wait until you find someone to start living out a foundation of obedience

towards Christ. Do it now.

And then as you're walking in the direction of Christ, as if when you're pleasing

the Lord, you look around every once in a while and you say,

oh, look, there she is. She's living the same thing.

She loves the Lord with all of her heart. She loves to worship.

She loves the things of God.

Find someone that's walking in agreement.

Find someone that you're walking in the same direction with.

Before you ever even go on your first date with someone, ask these two questions.

Is this person's life in harmony with God's Word?

No, this is not an old-fashioned question. This is a question that if you are

a believer, if you want to honor Christ with your life, these are the questions you ask.

Is this person's life in harmony with God's word?

Number two, are their actions, their ethics, and morals and goals aligned with God's word?

If they aren't either of those two things, bye-bye.

Sorry, girl. Sorry, boyfriend. I got something better. My aim is higher.

I've got something better.

Don't just go for anybody. If it's God's will that you're going to get married,

guess what? You'll get married in his timing.

His timing is not like ours. Usually ours is like, oh God, where are they?

They got to be here somewhere.

I need a date. No.

Find yourself complete in God. And at the right time, he'll bring someone.

Imagine if I were with Jen, and we're going for a walk, and I say, come on, babe, let's go.

And she starts walking that way, and I start walking that way. What happens?

We're going to be all by ourselves. Find someone that you can walk in the same direction with.

Proverbs 28, 19 says, where there is no vision, the people perish.

Now, we can apply this to our marriages as well.

Where there's no unity in the mission of our marriage, we're going to find ourselves struggling.

I'm going to do my thing, you're going to do yours. I'm going to go my way,

you're going to go yours.

That's why doing life and community and going through rooted together,

man, it puts you on these same pages. You're walking in the same direction.

There's this sense of unity.

And one of the greatest tragedies in marriages is when two people are together, but they're not united.

Two people are together. They're not united. One of my favorite couples in scripture

is one you may or may not be familiar with.

They're only mentioned six times in the Bible.

But what I love about this couple is that every time one spouse is mentioned,

both of their names are mentioned.

They're both mentioned together. You never hear the wife without the husband

or the husband without the wife.

I'll show you this couple, and their names are Priscilla and Aquila. Priscilla and Aquila.

Romans 16, 3-5 says this, and it gives you some insight about this married couple.

Paul writes, give my greetings to Priscilla and Aquila, my co-workers in Christ Jesus.

See, this was a couple that's hitched up to Paul, and they're co-workers.

They're walking in the same direction for the purpose of the gospel.

He says, they're my co-workers in Christ Jesus who risked their own necks for my life.

Not only do I thank them, but so do all the Gentile churches.

This couple, man, they're a power couple. They've done all kinds of stuff for the gospel.

Verse 5, greet also the church that meets in their home.

Greet my dear friend, Eponitis, who is the first convert to Christ from Asia.

So what do we know about this couple? Well, we know that they were on mission

for the furtherance of the gospel with Paul, that they risked their own life

for the gospel, that they were servants,

and that they even had a home church or a connection group or a life group or

Bible study or something, but there was a group of people that they hosted there in their house.

They were incredibly powerful because they were united in their mission for

the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Listen, God wants to unite you and your partner to do something incredible for the gospel.

It's all about the gospel. He wants to take your relationship and your marriage

and go to the next level, not just to coexist or be roommates or housemates.

No, he's got a divine purpose for you to live out with your wife or with your husband.

If you want a God-honoring, mission-driven marriage in the future,

then live a God-honoring mission life today.

Your greatest goal should not Not to be married, just to get married, young people.

Your ultimate goal as a single individual is identical to that of a married

person, right? It's to honor God.

So honor God now with everything you have, everything you are.

Honor God now. It doesn't matter if you are single, if you're married.

The mission of life, the mission that Christ has given us is to be obedient

to Him and to live a life that honors Him in every aspect of it.

And if you don't do it, odds are you'll never have the marriage or the relationship

that Christ wants you to have.

With everything in you, walk in a manner that pursues Jesus.

And as you walk toward Jesus, you'll find someone that's walking in the same direction.

We're going to prepare for communion in just a minute, Adam's going to come up.

But before we do that, I want to give

you three takeaways to help you be mission-driven in your relationships.

Number one, live out your marriage as a reflection of Christ's love.

That's what we're called to do in life, but in our marriage.

Live out your marriage as a reflection of Christ's love.

Ephesians 5 says this, Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church

and gave himself for her to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word.

He did this to present the church to himself in splendor without spot or wrinkle

or anything like that, but holy and blameless.

Husbands. Scripture puts it on us.

He puts it on you to be the leader, to love your spouse like Christ loves the church.

Talk about lofty goals.

Look at the incredible love that Jesus has for us. It's supposed to be a parallel

of the way that we love our brides.

I fail at that every day and most of us would agree that we fail at that.

It's supposed to be sacrificial. But how many times do we want our own ways, fellas?

It's supposed to be sanctifying. It's supposed to be making her more holy. Holy.

We're supposed to be purifying. We're the ones that are purifying the relationship with the Word of God.

Husbands, when we love our wives like Christ loved the church,

it's to be purposeful. It's selfless.

It's sacrificial.

And it will always, always result in a marriage that is holy and that reflects

the glory and the love of Christ.

Man, it's a huge challenge.

I don't think Paul could have given us a bigger challenge, guys.

Oh, you know, when it comes to the way you love your wife, just love her like Jesus loves the church.

He died for the church. He gave himself for the church.

Yet I want to go home and take a nap.

And I'm going to today because I'm sick, honey.

Guys, do everything you can to love your wife like Jesus loves the church.

Number two, pray and seek God's guidance together.

I hope that you, over the past week, we talked about prayer last week.

I hope that some of you have started praying with your wives,

and we said it doesn't have to be anything long.

Just even if it's a simple, God, please help Jen to feel better today.

I know she's not feeling well either.

Just those little tasks, or praying with your kid.

Praying with your friend.

There's something uniting. But we pray and we seek God's guidance together.

Philippians 4 says, don't worry about anything.

That's hard for us to do in marriage. We got bills.

We got kids. Lord Jesus, we got so much going on.

I can't find time for myself because we're so busy running kids everywhere.

But he says, don't worry about it. In everything, through prayer and petition,

with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the result, here it is.

And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts

and minds in Christ Jesus.

What if we started praying more with our kids?

What if we started actually petitioning and praying with thanksgiving?

God, we're running crazy this week. I got three kids in three different spots.

Thanks that I have kids. What would that do to our attitudes?

What would that do to encourage us as a family?

Listen, marriage is hard. But remember, if you're married, God has called you

to it. And he will empower you.

And one of the greatest tools he has given us is the power of prayer pray together pray together.

James 1, 5 says, now if any of you lack wisdom, he should ask God who gives

to all generously and ungrudgingly and it will be given to him.

I can honestly say I have quoted this verse in prayer probably seven or eight times this week.

Whether it's counseling with people or talking with people or just reminding myself.

God, I don't have all the answers on how to do ministry. God,

I don't have all the answers on how to be a husband.

God, I don't have all the answers on how to do this or to be the best at this or that. I don't know.

God, would you give me wisdom? Listen, God desires that you call out to him, that you cry out to him.

And it says he will give to you abundantly.

You need wisdom somewhere in your life? Call out to him. Lastly,

serve others and share the gospel as a team.

Serve others and share the gospel as a team.

Galatians 5 says, you were called to be free, brothers and sisters.

Only don't use this freedom as an opportunity for the flesh,

but serve one another through love.

How are some ways you could serve your spouse today?

Or your significant other today? Or even your kids today? or co-worker or teacher's assistant?

How can you be Christ? How can you serve out of the love of Christ?

You've been empowered for it. You've been gifted for it. 1 Peter 4 says,

just as one has received a gift, use it to serve others as good stewards of the very grace of God.

God has gifted you with talents and spiritual gifts, and it's not for you just

to put under a basket. It's to serve others with, to love others with, to be salt and light.

And I want to encourage you, everything you do in your relationships,

utilize it for the kingdom of God.

For the kingdom of God.

I mentioned it briefly earlier, but remember Christ's mission.

Before he ascended back to the Father, he said this.

Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name

of the Father and the Son and of the Holy Spirit.

Teaching them to observe everything I've commanded you.

And remember, I am with you always to the end of the age.

He's given us a mandate. He's given us a mission.

And if we're going to live missional lives, it's going to require multiplication.

Missional living requires multiplication.

That means discipleship.

If I am commanded to make disciples because I am a Christian,

then the person I marry should be an asset to me attaining that goal.

Young people, again, when you're looking for someone that you want to be with,

remember the mandate on your life and find someone that's going to be an asset,

in making disciples not a distraction.

Make discipleship one of your missions as a married couple get into a group

and make community the center of your life Do life with other people,

other couples or singles that are walking in the same direction.

Why is it so important that we have next-gen youth on Wednesday night?

Is it so we can eat a bunch of pizza?

I mean, pizza, good.

That's not why. Because we want your kids and my kids and your kids,

We want our students to have a place where they can come to the saving knowledge

of Jesus Christ and then they can begin to do life with people like them.

Music.

Got people that have just come to Christ. We got people that are far from Christ.

We got people that are being raised in the church, but we want to gather them

up and we want to walk in the same direction and we want to build them and we

want to live a missional life for the kingdom.

Live a missional life in your relationships.

You've got a mandate. You're better off with your spouse.

You're better off. You're going to accomplish more if you walk in the same direction.

And maybe you guys need to come

together and say, hey, we have not been walking in the same direction.

Let's walk in the same direction.

Maybe we need to get involved. We need to serve. We need to disciple others. We need to be discipled.

Go to the Lord right now and let's ask him what we need to do to be on mission for him.

Father, we thank you.

We thank you for the gift of relationships.

Even in this place, we find ourselves all in different places of life,

different places on our journey.

We've got single folks. We've got widowed folks. We've got divorced folks.

We've got married folks.

We got newlyweds. We got people that have been married forever.

I pray that you would align our mission.

If they're a young couple, that they would say, we're going to walk this way together.

We're going to live a missional life. We're going to be each other's strength,

each other's encouragement, each other's best friends, each other's assets to

bringing people to the kingdom.

And if you're here and you're not in that place, God, convict people.

We have one life.

Lord, I pray that you would help people to fix their eyes on you,

the author, perfecter, and finisher of the faith.

That we would walk in a manner that pleases you. Let our marriages honor you.

Help us be Christ-centered. Help us to be mission-driven for your glory,

not for ours, for your glory and for your kingdom. In Jesus' name.

Music.