With a Restored Follower

John's Gospel, chapter 21, from verse 15 through to 25.

That's on page 907 in the Church Bibles,

which are available on the table at the back of the sanctuary,

both downstairs and upstairs.

Print it on the screen, and it's also in your bulletin as well.

So John 21 at verse 15.

When they had finished breakfast,

Jesus said to Simon Peter,

Simon, son of John,

do you love me more than these?

He said to him,

Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.

He said to him,

Feed my lambs.

He said to him a second time,

Simon, son of John,

do you love me?

He said to him,

Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.

He said to him,

Tend my sheep.

He said to him the third time,

Simon, son of John,

do you love me?

Peter was grieved because he said to him the third time,

do you love me?

And he said to him,

Lord, you know everything.

You know that I love you.

Jesus said to him,

Feed my sheep.

Truly, truly,

I say to you,

when you were young,

you used to dress yourself

and walk wherever you wanted.

But when you are old,

you will stretch out your hands

and another will dress you

and carry you

where you do not want to go.

This he said to show by what kind of death

he wants to glorify God.

And after saying this,

he said to him,

Follow me.

Peter turned and saw the disciple

whom Jesus loved following them,

the one who also had leaned back against him

during the supper

and had said,

Lord,

is it that,

Lord,

who is it that is going to betray you?

When Peter saw him,

he said to Jesus,

Lord,

what about this man?

Jesus said to him,

If it is my will

that he remain until I come,

what is that to you?

You follow me.

So the saying spread abroad

among the brothers

that this disciple was not to die.

Yet Jesus did not say to him

that he was not to die,

but if it is my will

that he remain until I come,

what is that to you?

This is the disciple

who is bearing witness

about these things

and who has written these things,

and we know

that his testimony is true.

Now, there are many other things

that Jesus did.

Were every one of them to be written,

I suppose that the world itself

could not contain the books

that would be written.

Amen.

May God bless to us

reading of his own precious

and most holy word.

We are continuing to look at

encounters with Jesus,

and we're looking again

at this encounter

between Jesus and Peter

at the very end of John's gospel.

Peter has just had breakfast

with Jesus on the beach.

Peter was a spectacular failure.

We looked at that last week.

Peter had said,

before Jesus' crucifixion,

if you go to die,

I will go to die with you.

And when it came time

to test that,

Peter denied

even knowing Jesus

three separate times.

And here,

the spectacular failure

of Jesus Christ,

pardon me,

Peter,

is encountered

by Jesus Christ.

And Peter

is encountered

because Peter

experienced a moment

where he was treacherous,

and he was a coward,

and he was a liar.

And Peter carried

a wound

so deep.

So if you've ever

found yourself

in a place

where you think,

I didn't know

I was capable of that,

crossing a line,

it creates a wound in you

that is so deep,

only the Messiah himself

can heal it.

And when they had breakfast

on the beach,

Jesus Christ,

the surgeon,

healed Peter

and restored him.

And he did that

by way of walking

through repentance.

Peter experienced

real repentance.

And so last week,

we were asking,

have you ever experienced

real repentance?

And real repentance

is staring

at the mirror

of your sin

that Jesus is holding up

and looking at the truth

of your wounded heart,

your sinful heart,

and saying,

who can understand

how deep the sin goes?

The pride problem

I have really goes.

And then from that,

experiencing the godly sorrow

that Peter did.

It says,

Peter says it was grieved.

And by that,

it means,

you know you've had

real godly sorrow

and real repentance

when you say,

I'm not so concerned

about what my sin cost me.

I'm concerned about,

I want to acknowledge

what my sin cost him,

cost Jesus.

And that's godly sorrow.

That's real repentance.

And when Peter experiences that,

he is restored.

He's forgiven.

He was already forgiven.

And that means today,

if you come as a person

who knows yourself

as a failure,

who knows yourself

as a person

who has crossed a line

in your life,

if you are willing

to look in the mirror at all

and say,

my heart is desperately wicked,

who can understand it?

The absolute best place

to be,

no matter if you're a Christian

or not this morning,

is to come and sit

at the feet of Jesus

at the charcoal fire.

That's the best place to be,

to sit at Jesus' feet.

And the question

I want to ask today

as we look at this passage

and extend it a bit

one more time,

we'll look today

down to verse 23.

We'll have to leave

the very end of John's gospel

for later.

The question I want to ask

is what happens

when a follower of Jesus

experiences a spectacular failure,

but then they're forgiven

like Jesus loves to do.

And they're restored.

That's the word,

restored.

And what we see

in this passage,

and this is what we never

could get to last week,

is that then

you're commissioned.

So what we learn here

is that when you are restored,

when you are forgiven,

you're also commissioned

or recommissioned.

In other words,

verse 19,

when Peter experiences forgiveness,

Jesus says,

follow me.

be my disciple.

You're restored,

you're recommissioned.

What does it mean?

So let's think about that.

What does it mean?

What does it mean?

And today is less of a day

that's maybe pulling

on the heartstrings

and more of a day

that's asking the question,

if I'm a Christian

and I really have received

forgiveness after forgiveness,

what does it mean

to follow him?

So that's the question.

What does it mean

to follow him?

And then I just want

to conclude secondly

with one danger

from this passage,

one warning

that this passage gives us

about a barrier

that we all might face

to following Jesus.

So first,

what does it mean

to follow him?

Here,

Jesus is not just saying

to Peter in this passage,

your sin is covered,

you're forgiven.

And he is saying that,

grace upon grace.

He's turning then

and saying,

because you have been graced,

you've been clothed,

you are now being sent,

you're being commissioned,

you're being sent

to go and do something,

to go and follow me

all the way.

In other words,

your failures,

even as a disciple,

look,

if you've been following Jesus

for a long time,

but you've been in a pattern

of running from him

and of saying,

I didn't know

I would be capable of that,

even as a Christian,

that sin does not disqualify you

from living for him,

following him,

becoming again

a renewed disciple,

and that's what's going on here.

So here's the metaphor

that Jesus gives.

He says to Peter,

okay,

you're restored.

Now go three times,

feed my sheep,

tend my lambs,

feed my sheep.

That metaphor,

of course,

for Peter means

that he's being called here

and said,

hey,

you're still an apostle,

you're still a disciple,

you're also going to be

a minister,

a pastor,

you're going to have to preach.

So if you open,

if you flip over

to the book of Acts,

you can read all about

Peter's ministry

and how amazingly

at times

he fulfilled that command,

go and feed my sheep,

tend my lambs.

But,

what I want to say today

is that this is actually

the ark of every believer.

So when you read

the whole of John's gospel,

you realize that Jesus

is saying this

to all of us.

So if you come today

as a Christian,

the ark,

the story of every believer

is you've had to stand

in the mirror

and Jesus say,

stare right into

the heart of your sin

and receive grace

and restoration

and forgiveness

and now go and feed

my sheep,

go and tend my lambs.

So if you're a follower

of Jesus today,

this is not just for Peter.

The command,

feed my lambs,

tend my sheep,

follow me,

is for every single

one of us.

And so let's ask

a little more,

okay,

what does that mean

for us as people

in 2025

to actually do something

like that?

Let me give you

three things it means.

First,

Jesus says to Peter

three times,

do you love me?

Do you love me?

Do you love me?

Do you love me more

than these?

Is the first question

he asks him.

And we learned

that back in John 18

and before that,

Peter had said,

Lord,

I love you

and I love you

more than all these guys

and I will follow you

all the way to the very end

even if it costs me my life.

And when the time came,

he failed so spectacularly.

So today,

resting on his pride

in the past,

following Jesus

out of competition,

following Jesus

to get something,

to get a sense of

I'm better than other people.

That was his life before.

But after he failed

and then the resurrection happens,

he comes back again

and he receives

the same question,

do you love me

more than these?

And now what he says is,

I love you.

Lord,

you know that I love you.

And because he has experienced

such grief over his sin,

he can truly come

in this moment

and say,

I love you

out of a place of weakness.

Now here,

friends,

everybody today,

what is the first way

after you've been forgiven

and restored

that Jesus says,

follow me?

How do you do it?

Verse 19,

how do you follow him?

And the first thing

is to see this.

You follow him

by turning around

and loving him.

And so I just want

to simply ask today,

follower of Jesus Christ,

do you love Jesus?

Can you say today

when Jesus asks,

in the midst of your weakness,

in the midst of the fact

that he has died for you,

he has risen for you,

can you say today,

yes,

Lord,

you know I love you.

And what does that mean?

That means

not a perfect love at all,

but in some sense

having affection for Christ,

in some sense

having a heart of affection

that he draws you in

over and over again.

But if you think as well

about the rest of John's gospel,

in John 15,

John,

what did Jesus say?

He said,

if you love me,

if you love me,

how do you love him?

You will keep my commandments.

You'll listen to my teachings.

And so we learn,

the first way to follow Jesus

is just to ask the question,

am I growing

in my love for him?

And if I love him,

am I looking at his teachings

and seeking to obey them?

Now let me take that further.

Secondly,

the second way to follow Jesus.

It's right here in the passage.

When he says,

do you love me?

Then he turns and says three times,

feed my sheep,

tend my lambs,

feed my sheep.

And notice the pronoun there,

feed my sheep,

tend my lambs,

Jesus says.

Sometimes,

I know that this happens

to everybody

that's a member

or attends a local church

pretty regularly,

but sometimes,

especially when you're

a minister,

pastor,

people will say to you

something like,

how's your church doing?

You know,

and then you say,

you never know what to say.

You know,

I don't know.

I think it's okay.

Other people probably don't.

I'm not sure.

I'm thankful for what God's doing

around here.

But what's the question?

How is your church doing?

You could ask that as a member.

How's things at your church?

And if you're being cheeky,

you want to say,

well,

hold on a second.

It's not my church.

So Jesus here says,

feed my sheep,

tend my lambs.

And so he's saying to Peter,

get out.

In other words,

what is he talking about?

He's saying,

get out and love the church.

Love the church,

my sheep,

my lambs.

That's who he's talking about.

Now look,

if we were to put it all together,

what does it mean

to follow Jesus,

to respond to grace,

to be a disciple?

It means first,

to turn around and say,

not in order to get

into his kingdom,

but because I already am,

I want to grow in love

with you,

Jesus,

and love for you.

Love God,

and then he says,

love the church.

Sounds like a good

vision statement.

Love God,

love the church,

and then love the place

that you've been sent,

love the city.

This is the sum total

of what it means

to follow Jesus.

Love God,

grow in love for Jesus,

and love the church

is what he ultimately

tells Peter here.

He's been restored,

and he says,

love me,

and tend the people,

tend the sheep

that you've been given.

And this is for everybody.

Third,

lastly here,

to love him,

let me now bring this

into summary.

Okay,

if I could summarize this

in one image,

and it's right here,

I think,

coming out of the text.

To follow Jesus,

to be a disciple of Jesus,

is to give him,

then,

your heart.

So it's not to give him

your heart

in order to get his heart.

It's not to give him

your heart

in order to get

God's love for you.

It's because you have

God's love,

then you say,

now I want to grow

daily in giving

my heart away

to you,

Jesus.

John Calvin,

during the Reformation,

the great reformer

of Geneva,

he would write

a lot of letters

to people,

and we have

some of those letters,

and at the bottom

of his letters,

he would always,

often,

stamp or seal

and wax

an image,

and this image

has become

pretty famous.

some universities

use it,

or seminaries

use it as their image,

but it is,

you might have seen it,

it's two hands

like this

holding a heart,

and sometimes

when he would

put underneath

the seal,

he would write,

my heart

I give to you,

Lord,

promptly

and sincerely.

And so it was really,

the motto of his life

is,

because you have given me

your heart,

Christ,

I give you back

my heart,

and that's what it means

to follow Jesus.

It's a great image

to take away today.

In other words,

the final hymn

we're going to sing

in a few minutes

is,

I will go

where thou leadest me,

I will give you

my heart today.

Now,

what do we learn?

What do we learn here?

As a follower of Jesus,

we learn that

he is calling us

not to be directed

by our own desires,

but directed

by his mission for us,

to give our hearts away,

and that's exactly

what's going on

in verses 18 and 19.

If you look down

in verse 18 and 19,

he gives this parable,

Jesus does,

to Peter,

and he says,

truly, truly,

I say to you,

when you were young,

you would dress yourself,

you would walk

wherever you wanted to walk,

but when you're old,

you're going to stretch

out your hands,

somebody else

is going to dress you,

somebody else

is going to carry you

where you do not

want to go.

And John adds

this little parenthetical

comment,

that was a prophecy,

a parable,

about the death

that Peter was going

to ultimately

go and die.

What's going on here?

This parable,

this parable,

he's saying,

when you're early

in your discipleship,

Peter,

when you're following

me after this,

things are going

to be smooth,

they're going

to be okay.

Read Acts,

the early chapters

of the book of Acts,

but when you grow older,

somebody's going

to take you

where you do not

want to go.

And you can even

notice in this,

in verse 18,

he says,

somebody's going

to force you

to stretch out

your hands.

So we learn

by tradition,

second century

Tertullian,

Clement of Rome,

these early

second century

disciples,

that Peter,

around 80,

70,

was crucified.

And Jesus here

is referencing

that.

When you grow old,

this is going

to be 35 years

later from this

moment,

somebody's going

to stretch out

your hands

for you.

And you're going

to go to a place

that you do not

want to go.

And that's what

it means for you

to be called.

Now,

the last two

looks at John 21,

let's bring it

all together

and connect this.

We have noticed,

if you've been

with us,

we've noticed

that there have

been some deep

connections between

multiple passages

in the Gospels.

The beginning

of John 21,

the disciples

were out fishing.

They were not

doing the ministry

God called them

to do.

They were sitting

on their hands.

And that had

happened in Luke 5

as well,

when Peter and

these disciples

were first called.

In Luke 5,

they were out fishing

and Jesus said,

you haven't caught

any fish,

go cast your net

on the other side.

John 21,

you haven't caught

any fish,

cast your net

on the other side.

That's the scene

here.

Or last week,

we saw that.

In John 18,

when Peter denied

Jesus three times,

where was it?

If you were here

with us,

you remember,

around a charcoal

fire.

John 21,

Jesus restores

Peter around

a charcoal fire.

John 21,

15 to 25 today.

When Jesus wants

to express to Peter

what it's really like

to be a disciple,

what it's really like

to follow him

all the way,

he says to him,

I bid thee go

and die.

I bid thee go

and die for me.

Back in Mark chapter 8,

Mark 8 · chapter mention

the first time Jesus

ever said anything

like this,

Jesus said

to the disciples,

to Peter,

I have a cross

to bear

and you can't go

where I'm going.

And Peter said,

what do you mean?

And Jesus said,

I have to bear the cross,

I have to go

and die for you.

And Peter said,

oh Peter,

he said,

no Lord,

you can't die,

we won't let that happen.

And Jesus said,

get behind me Satan.

You know,

foolish Peter,

always running his mouth

and there he was again.

And then Jesus turns

and he says something

so important

that's right here

in John 21.

He said,

you too

must take up

your cross

and follow me.

Mark 8,

John 21,

what is Jesus saying?

When he turns to Peter

and says,

one day you are going

to go and die,

he's connecting it

to the same claim

Jesus has been making

the whole of his ministry

in the gospels.

He said to followers

of Jesus

over and over again,

what does it mean

to follow him?

It is,

I bid thee

go and die.

Take up your cross

and follow me.

That is the heart

of discipleship.

It's the heart

of what it means

to follow.

Love Jesus,

tend my sheep,

love the church,

and I bid thee

go and die.

Now what type

of death is this?

As we finish

this first point,

what type of death

are we talking about?

This is a death

that every Christian

is called to.

And is it

the physical martyrdom

that Peter experiences?

No,

not at all.

We of course know

that most Christians

are not called

to become martyrs.

Some are,

some aren't.

But what type

of death is it?

There's a commentator

on Mark's gospel

that's fairly well known,

a guy named James Edwards.

And this is what

he writes about

the idea

that Jesus says.

What does it mean

to be a follower

when he says,

take up your cross?

What exactly

does Jesus mean by that?

This is what

James Edwards writes.

He says,

Jesus chose an image

of extreme repugnance

to describe discipleship.

The cross was the instrument

of cruelty, pain,

dehumanization,

and shame.

The cross symbolized

the hated Roman oppression

and was reserved

for the lowest social classes.

It was the most visible

and omnipresent aspect

of Rome's terror apparatus.

He notes that in 71 BC,

the Roman general Crassus

defeated the famous

slave Spartacus.

You probably know

something of that story.

And what did he do?

Crassus,

the Roman general,

crucified Spartacus

and 6,000 people

down the stretch

of one long road.

And that was really

the beginning

of the cross

as Rome's terror apparatus.

One century later

in 71,

approximately 80,

Nero,

the emperor of Rome,

will crucify Peter

along a road

in the city of Rome.

And James Edwards comments

and he says,

this is the image.

Boy,

this is the image

that Jesus chose

to say,

go and be my disciple

like that.

Take up a cross.

This repugnant,

hideous image

in the first century.

You know,

a Jewish person

in the first century

would have known

how ugly this was,

how horrific this was.

And ultimately,

at the heart of it,

it's got a death.

That's what he's talking about,

a death.

What kind of death is this?

He says,

Peter,

to truly follow me,

I bid thee go and die.

Christian friend here,

disciple,

if you are a follower of Jesus,

he's saying,

I bid thee go and die.

What kind of a death is it?

And just one little line

back in Mark 8

tells us ultimately

what it was all about.

And back in Mark 8,

he says,

if you really want to follow me,

if you want to save your life,

you must lose it

for my sake.

What kind of death is it

that you have to die

to be a follower of Jesus?

Jesus.

It's not physical necessarily.

It's not the death

of a martyr necessarily.

No.

What has to die?

What has to die

is a part of you.

That's what has to die.

That's what Jesus

is talking about.

To be a follower of Jesus

that's growing,

that's growing in love for God,

love for the church.

He's saying,

ultimately,

that looks like this

killing a part of you,

killing a part of yourself,

a daily dying

that has to take place

where you are,

one part of you

is looking at another part of you

and saying,

this old part of me

has to die.

It has to be mortified.

It has to be killed.

And it sounds really philosophical,

but it's simply something like this.

Paul says,

this type of death

is the death

of the love of self.

And Jesus is saying,

true discipleship

is to give your heart away

every day

into the hand of Jesus

and say,

I recognize today

that something of me

has to die

if I'm going to follow you.

And what has to die

is the love of self

expressed

in selfish relationship,

selfish ambition,

selfish desire for wealth,

selfish greed,

selfish care,

selfish comfort.

And he's saying here,

Peter,

you've got to be willing

to become fully a follower

by losing that part of yourself

that wants to live for self,

that wants to love self

all the way

to the day of your death.

This is a call

to daily dying.

This is a classic

Puritan expression.

Wake up every day

and say,

Lord,

to live is Christ,

to die is gain.

I,

how does Paul put it?

I have been crucified

with Christ.

It is not me

who lives today,

but me in him.

So I give you my heart

into your hands.

Show me all the ways today

that I need to die to self

in order to live for you.

It's very painful.

It's not easy.

It is very difficult for us

and it is the call

that we're given.

Not in order to be

a part of God's people,

but because we are.

The call to dying to self

every day.

Now,

let me finish secondly

and briefly with this.

There is one warning here

that is a barrier

to this type of discipleship

in the passage.

The danger is always,

this is what happened

with Peter over and over again,

is that without that commitment

to daily dying to self,

you will drift back

to your old life.

You will drift back

to the old desires.

You will drift back

to your old self.

And Peter found himself

in that place

over and over again

in his life

and that's an experience

that any Christian

in the room

can describe, right?

Verse 20 and 21,

boy, Peter,

he's just been restored.

He's just been forgiven.

And in verse 20 and 21,

it says that

as Jesus and Peter

are walking down

the beach together,

Peter turns around

and he sees John,

the disciple,

following them.

They're walking down

the beach.

John is following them.

And as soon

as Jesus says to Peter,

you have to go

and die for me,

Peter's response is,

what about him?

John,

is he going to have to?

He says,

Lord, what about this man,

John?

He's the other leader

of the apostles.

Is he going to have

to do it too?

And Jesus can only say,

do not worry about him.

Why are you asking

about John?

I have put you

where I want to put you

and I've given you

the life that you're

going to have.

Go and die to yourself

and follow me.

a great barrier

to growth as a disciple.

I had three,

I cut it back to one.

You'll be thankful.

A great barrier

to growth as a disciple

is the alluring power

of comparison and envy,

of looking at other people's lives

as a Christian

and saying,

Lord,

why didn't you give me

that life?

Why didn't you give me

that gift?

Why didn't you call me

to that part

of your little kingdom,

of your enormous kingdom,

a little part

of your enormous kingdom?

Why didn't you give me

that, Lord?

Comparison and envy,

as it's commonly said,

is a thief of all joy.

It will steal your joy away

and it will actually turn,

what does comparison

and envy do?

It turns us back

into self

when Jesus has said,

give me your heart

every day,

daily dying.

Comparison and envy

are one of the many issues

we struggle with

that turns our minds

and our hearts

back to self-interest

instead of self-forgetfulness

because it constantly

keeps us in our own heads

and says,

why not?

Why not me?

Why don't I have this?

Lord,

why didn't you give me this?

And we're being told here,

we're being shown here

by Peter

that you can be standing

in the presence

of Jesus Christ

restored,

forgiven,

recommissioned,

saying,

Peter,

you're going to go

do great things

for the kingdom of God

and immediately

sidelined by comparison

and envy

and struggling

with the,

ultimately,

what is this?

This is the allure

of comfort

and saying,

that sounds great,

Lord,

I want to be forgiven

but I don't want

to count the cost

of discipleship.

I don't,

I want to live

a comfortable life.

Why does John

get to not die for you?

Why do I have to?

He wants to be comfortable.

You see,

the allure of comfort

drives him

to the allure,

the struggle

of comparison

and envy.

Envy,

what is love?

What is true love?

Love is when

you look out

at other people,

when Jesus says,

feed my sheep,

tend my lambs,

when you look out

at other people

and say,

I'm happy

with your happiness.

That's real love.

I am excited

for the good things

going on in your life.

Envy in comparison

is a nasty thing

and what does it do?

It says,

I'm sad

when you're happy

and I'm happy

when you're sad.

And Jesus is saying,

Peter's showing,

watch out

because it will take you

out of the path

of growing

and following Jesus.

And what's the only antidote?

Daily dying.

Lord,

I give you my heart today.

Kill that part of myself

that needs to die

that is envious

and comparing

and struggling

with wanting comfort

far more than giving myself

away for you.

That's the part of us

that ultimately has to die.

Let me bring it home to me,

to a pastor,

to a minister.

This can happen to anybody.

Here's an example.

Can the local pastor,

can the local minister

look at what God

might be doing

down the street

bringing a small revival

or a big revival

to the church,

to the Baptist church

down the road

and say,

I'm happy

for what God is doing

down there.

I'm excited for that.

I want,

if we lose people to that,

if people go there

because of all God's doing,

I want to see

the kingdom grow.

See,

the allure of envy

would say,

institutionalism.

It's this place or nothing.

It's the allure

that can capture all of us.

Maybe social media today,

maybe you need to,

as we pray in a moment,

need to ask,

is social media

robbing me of discipleship

by putting me

in the path

of comparison and envy

and self-interest,

turning me back in on

what is my life like

compared to everybody else

all the time

and taking away

the possibility

of daily dying?

God has put you,

let me close with this,

God has put you

exactly where you are.

God had given Peter

exactly what he wanted

for Peter

and that was a hard

providence,

martyrdom,

and he's calling us

today to say,

do not let comparison

and envy

take away

the path of calling,

the focus on it

that God has ultimately

given you.

Charles Dickens,

in his book,

A Tale of Two Cities,

there's a character

named Sidney Carton

and if you've read it,

you'll know about Sidney.

Sidney was a man

who had a life of regret.

He was an older man.

He really hated himself,

a lot of self-loathing.

He was deeply cynical

and it's because

he was,

as a young man,

told by everybody

how brilliant he was

and how much he was

going to do with his life

and how great he was

going to be

and he had just lived

a really mediocre life.

He had never done

anything great

and as he got older,

it made him deeply upset

and angry,

really self-loathing,

hated the world,

hated himself

but at the end of the novel,

one of his friends,

Charles,

was arrested falsely

and imprisoned

and Charles was sentenced

to death by guillotine

and Sidney,

coming to himself

and getting out

of his self-interest

and self-loathing,

getting out of his own head.

He realized that

throughout the book,

Dickens hints at this

several times,

but Sidney and Charles,

they looked alike.

People confused them

for brothers quite often

and so Sidney turned

and he went into the prison,

snuck in

and took the place

of Charles in the prison

and let Charles,

helped Charles escape

and then Sidney went

to death

by guillotine

for Charles

and Dickens puts

these words

in Sidney's mouth

at the end of the book.

He says that going to die

in the place of another,

this is what he writes,

Sidney says,

it is a far,

far better thing

that I do

than I have ever done.

It is a far,

far better rest

that I go to today

than I have ever known.

And what is he saying?

He's at,

look,

here's what he's saying.

What makes life great?

What makes life great

is not,

is when you look up

and say,

I have given myself away

for a purpose

far bigger than me

and not been crushed

by self-loathing

and self-interest.

I've become self-forgetful.

That is what makes life great.

That is what brings joy

ultimately in life

and that is exactly

what Jesus is calling us to.

Don't let comparison

and envy

take away self-forgetfulness.

Daily dying

is the only prescription.

I give the last word

here to Peter's story today.

If you were to read now

the rest of the New Testament

and follow Peter's narrative arc,

Peter went out

and was self-forgetful

and he followed Jesus

and he lived

throughout much

of the book of Acts

in a way that was

amazing and important

and many people came to faith

because of his ministry.

But about 15 years after this,

flip to the book of Galatians

and we find out

that when Paul went

to visit Peter at Antioch,

he said Peter

was actively

and openly

denying the gospel

and he was refusing

to eat with Gentiles

and he said

that Peter used

to eat with Gentiles

and call them

brothers and sisters

but now he's not.

Why?

Because other people

came to Antioch

and said,

no, no, no.

If you want to be a Christian,

you've got to follow Jesus

and be circumcised.

You've got to follow Jesus

and obey all the works

of the Mosaic law

and Peter,

afraid of what other people

thought about him,

went around saying,

yeah, yeah, that's it.

If you want to be a Christian,

it's more than Jesus.

Boy, oh Peter,

a failure constantly

throughout his life.

Paul even uses the language

that attends to being

anti-Christ, anti-gospel

in Peter's ministry

in that moment.

And that means that

Christian discipleship

and following Jesus

is not a 45 degree angle

of virtue enhancement.

It is a constant struggle

and up and down.

And Peter's narrative arc,

you flip over to 1 and 2 Peter,

these beautiful letters

that we have from him

10 years after Peter

denying the gospel

to the Galatians,

in Antioch,

noted in the book of Galatians.

And this is what he says.

I think,

let me finish with this.

I think Peter was thinking

of himself and his story here

when he writes these words.

He says,

Jesus Christ himself

bore our sins

in his body on the cross

so that we might die to sin

and live to righteousness.

By his wounds,

you have been healed.

For you,

here it is,

for you are like sheep

without a shepherd.

You are like sheep

going astray,

but now you have returned

to the shepherd.

How many times

did Peter have to say,

but now I've returned

to the shepherd?

Jesus keeps bringing us back.

That's the arc

of following him

throughout life.

You do not have

to be good enough.

You do not have

to be a good enough disciple

to be worthy

of Jesus calling you

a disciple.

The message here

is not,

if you follow me

and if you adequately

take up your cross

consistently,

then I will give you

the power of my cross.

The message here is,

I have given you

the power of my cross.

So keep coming back.

Keep coming

and be restored

and be set back

on your path.

A question for you.

As we pray,

do you today,

everyone in this room,

do you today

need to be restored

and recommissioned

this morning?

Do you today,

as we pray,

join me in prayer

in just a moment

and say to the Lord,

Jesus,

I am captured

by legalism.

I'm captured

by seeking approval.

I'm captured

by comparison.

I'm captured

by envy.

I'm captured

by wanting comfort

far more than daily dying.

I'm not living for you.

I'm not following you.

And be restored.

Let us pray.

Father,

we are captured

and so we recognize that.

We are struggling

with following you

all the way.

And so today,

we confess before you

our need of approval,

our need of comfort,

our struggle

with comparison

and envy

that is taking away

our self-forgetfulness

and our ability

to just live for you

and to love you

and love people

and love the city

and love the place

where you've put us.

And we just want

to recognize our struggle.

And so,

in the light of that,

Lord,

restore us,

deliver us from that,

set us back on our path,

help us to hear

the words that

we don't give you

our hearts today

so that we might be accepted.

We give you our hearts today

simply to respond

to the fact

that we have been accepted

by you.

Take our hearts today.

We give you our hearts

this very week.

We pray that in Jesus' name.

Amen.