The Story that Shapes Us 7: Alive After All: The Joy of Reconciliation

This podcast is brought to you by Walnut Grove Lutheran Church in Langley, D.C., in the hope that it will draw you closer to the one who loves you most.

While teaching nuclear physics to naval students in the United States, Everett Worthington became interested in psychology because these students were heading to Vietnam.

And as you can imagine, there was a lot of psychological issues that came up.

So he switched fields and entered the field of psychology, and he became an expert in the realm of forgiveness.

And he was renowned for this.

But then tragedy struck his family in 1996 when a burglar broke into his mother's home on New Year's Eve and murdered her.

And now forgiveness was not just a theoretical concept for Everett.

He realized that he had to forgive his mother's murderer, and eventually he was able to do that.

But tragedy struck again a few years later in 2005.

For you see, it was his brother who found his mother's body, and he experienced post-traumatic stress disorder because of that.

And in 2005, he took his own life.

And Everett blamed himself for not effectively sharing with his brother what he knew about therapy because he thought that maybe he could have helped his brother in some way and prevented what had happened.

And Everett really struggled with this issue of self-forgiveness.

He said, in many ways, I think self-condemnation can be more difficult than forgiving others, because while you can always get away from another person who hurt you, you can never get away from yourself.

You're trying to be both the offender and the forgiver.

Forgiveness is a big deal in the life of those who follow Jesus.

Every Sunday we confess our sins and we receive God's forgiveness.

We also pray the Lord's Prayer in which we ask God to forgive us our trespasses or sins as we forgive those who trespass or sin against us.

But then moments come for us, like it did for Everett, where forgiveness is not just a theoretical concept anymore.

Someone hurts us or someone we love.

Something we value is stripped away.

We realize how much we have hurt or harmed others.

And in the depths of these dark valleys, our wounds can be so deep and our guilt can be so strong that forgiveness for what happens seems to be impossible to us.

We find ourselves in a prison of unforgiveness that negatively impacts all aspects of our life: mental, physical, social, and spiritual, and we cannot find the way out.

So how do we forgive when forgiveness seems impossible?

For direction as we reflect on this question, let's dig into the story that shapes us and continue our look at the life of Joseph.

Now, last week we saw how God took Joseph from a pit to the palace.

Joseph was made second in command over all of Egypt and put in charge of gathering food to create a reserve during seven good years of good crops, and then that reserve would be used to keep people alive during the seven years of famine that followed.

The famine also impacted Joseph's family in Canaan.

It wasn't just in Egypt, it was a regional famine.

And when they heard that there was food that they could buy in Egypt, Jacob sent ten of his sons to buy grain there, but he kept his youngest son Benjamin at home because he didn't want any harm to come to him.

Now when the ten brothers came before Joseph, they bowed down before him just as Joseph's dreams had foretold.

And even though twenty years had passed, Joseph immediately recognized his brothers, even though they didn't recognize him.

Joseph spoke harshly to his brothers and accused them of being spies.

They deny it.

For 20 years they have been living a lie regarding what they did to Joseph, and the truth of who they are and what they did has not sunk into the center of their souls.

So they claim to be honest when Joseph knows that they aren't.

Joseph has the ten brothers thrown into jail for three days.

Then he releases them and allows them to return home on the condition that one of them stays in Egypt until the rest bring the youngest son, Benjamin, to Egypt.

Joseph is recreating what his brothers did to him when they bound him up and abandoned him to an unknown future which would likely end in death.

Would Joseph's brothers abandon another brother to death in Egypt?

Three days in jail and their anxious dilemma that was set before them moved the brothers to connect what they were experiencing right now to what they did to Joseph long ago.

They said to one another, surely we are being punished because of our brother.

We saw how distressed he was when he pleaded with us for his life, but we would not listen.

That's why this distress has come on us.

Joseph understood what they were saying, and he turned away to weep.

Then Simeon was bound before the brothers' eyes and taken away.

Joseph ordered his servants to put the money that the brothers brought to pay for the grain in their sacks.

And when this was discovered on the way home, the nine brothers were terrified and said, What is this God has done to us?

Things got even worse when the remaining brothers returned home and told their father that the Lord of the land in Egypt demanded that they take Benjamin to Egypt.

Their father Jacob said to them, You have deprived me of my children.

Joseph is no more, and Simeon is no more, and now you want to take Benjamin.

Everything is against me.

Jacob refused to let Benjamin go.

When the food they had bought in Egypt finally ran out, though, Jacob relented and sent his remaining sons with double the money and Benjamin to Egypt to buy more food.

When Joseph saw Benjamin with his brothers, he had a feast prepared for them and invited them into his house.

The brothers were afraid that this was a trap, and so they confessed about the money to the steward of Joseph's house.

Now they were starting to be as honest as they had earlier claimed.

When the time came for the sight of Benjamin moved Joseph to flee the room and weep, when he returned, the feast began, and to their amazement the brothers noticed that they were seated in order from oldest to youngest.

And when the time came for the brothers to leave, Joseph set up another test.

Again, he has all of their money placed in their grain sacks, but he also puts his, has his silver cup put in Benjamin's grain sack.

And then shortly after the group left, Joseph sent his steward after them to accuse them of stealing the cup.

Whoever has the cup must remain in Egypt as a slave.

The sacks are opened from oldest to youngest, and the cup is found in Benjamin's grain bag.

The brothers tear their clothes in grief and then return to face Joseph.

When Joseph declares that Benjamin must stay in Egypt and be his slave while the other brothers go free, Judah speaks up.

Concerned for his father, Judah, and you may remember, was the one who suggested Joseph be sold into slavery.

Judah offers his life in exchange for Benjamin's.

Seeing the dramatic change in his brothers' hearts, Joseph asked all the servants to leave.

And then he said to his brothers, I am your brother Joseph, the one you sold into Egypt.

And now do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you.

For two years now there has been famine in the land, and for the next five years there will be no ploughing and reaping.

But God sent me ahead of you to reserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance.

So then it was not you who sent me here, but God.

Then he sent them back to Canaan with carts to move their father and their families to Egypt.

There would be five more years of famine, but they would be safe in Egypt, for Joseph promised to provide for them.

Years later, when Jacob died, Joseph's brothers thought that Joseph would now take revenge on them.

They didn't trust that the reconciliation between them and Joseph was genuine.

And they didn't trust that Joseph had truly forgiven them in his heart.

So they begged Joseph for forgiveness.

And Joseph weeps.

This is all so unnecessary.

He knows the truth of what they did to him, but he has already forgiven them in his heart.

And he can see things from God's perspective.

And then he says one of the one of the most profound passages in Scripture.

And then he told them to not be afraid.

And again he promised to provide for them and their children.

So what does this mean for us?

The story of Joseph and his brothers reveals the profound importance of forgiveness in our lives.

We all need forgiveness.

We all need to share forgiveness.

Many of us see ourselves in Joseph's brothers.

There are things that we have done, said, or left undone that we wish we could take back.

Some of us carry the same burden as Joseph, the deep ache of being sinned against, of being betrayed, abandoned, or harmed by someone we trusted.

And some of us, like Everett Worthington, carry the heaviest burden of all.

The weight of self-condemnation.

The sense that I should have done better.

I can't forgive myself.

Forgiveness is what we and others need.

But forgiveness is often hard for us.

Confessing our sins to others is hard because our pride holds us back from humbling ourselves.

Forgiving others who have hurt us is hard because we want healing for our pain before we give our forgiveness.

And we don't realize that forgiveness is part of the healing process that we need.

And we find it hard to forgive ourselves because we want to hold on to our notions of how forgiveness works rather than accept God's gracious wisdom on the matter.

And in each of these situations, the roadblocks is the same.

Our eyes are focused on the sin and we are ignoring the heart of God.

Forgiveness, you see, dear friends, whether giving or receiving it does not begin with you or me.

It begins with God.

The God who sent Joseph ahead to preserve life.

The God who sent Jesus into this world to pay the full cost of forgiveness for all our sins.

And it is in Jesus where we most clearly see the loving, gracious, forgiving heart of God.

And when we recognize the immensity of God's love for us in Christ and receive it, we are transformed into being people who were transformed from being people who focus on our guilt in pain into being people who see every conflict as an opportunity for us to glorify God by sharing his incredible gift of reconciliation with others.

Joseph's words to his brothers echo through scripture until they find their fulfillment in Jesus.

It was not you who sent me, but God.

Joseph was betrayed, abandoned, and left for dead, yet God used his suffering to save many lives.

Jesus was betrayed, abandoned, and crucified.

And God used his suffering to save the world.

Joseph receives him, reveals himself alive after all.

And his brothers are stunned into silence, pardon me.

Jesus reveals himself alive after all.

And his disciples are stunned into joy.

Joseph speaks peace to the ones who wronged him.

Jesus speaks peace to the ones who deserted him.

Joseph provides for the family that betrayed him.

Jesus provides forgiveness, reconciliation, and new creation for the world that crucified him.

This is the heart of the gospel.

Reconciliation is not wishful thinking, it is resurrection reality.

You are not trapped in the story of what has happened.

You are not defined by the wound you carry or the wound you caused.

You are not living under the shadow of a past that cannot be changed.

The risen Christ stands before you not with accusation, but with scars that heal.

Not with condemnation, but with reconciliation, not with revenge, but with resurrection.

And because he lives, forgiveness is always possible.

Because he lives, reconciliation can be totally real.

Because he lives, even the deepest wounds can become places where God brings life to us.

So the challenge that I'm leaving before you today is to live a lifestyle of reconciliation, to be continually looking for those opportunities to glorify God in the midst of conflict.

Perhaps that means confessing something you've been carrying for years.

Or maybe it's releasing someone who has hurt you.

Or maybe it is finally letting Christ speak forgiveness over that part of yourself that you have not been able to forgive.

Jesus gave his life in exchange for yours.

He paid the full cost for all sins in the world to be forgiven, no matter how deep or dark they may be, and that includes all of your sins and my sins too.

He rose from the dead to give you new life with him that will last forever.

And so let Jesus' love transform you into being an ambassador of reconciliation.

And as we seek to share the peace of Jesus' forgiveness with ourselves and with others, we bless the world in Jesus' name.

Amen.

Let's pray.

Dear Jesus, we thank you for being the greatest reconciler of all.

We thank you for suffering and dying on the cross and then rising again so that we could be at peace with you and the Father and the Spirit through the forgiveness of sins that you give to us.

And we pray, Lord, that you would be present with us in a special way and that you would help us to reflect your heart into the world around us by being people who seek to make peace through confession and forgiveness, that gift that you have freely given us.

Please help us, Lord, to do this.

In your precious name we ask this, and all God's people said.

Amen.

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Thank you and God bless us.