When Life Falls Apart 2: Naming Our Fears

This podcast is brought to you by Walnut Grove Lutheran Church in Langley, DC, in the hope that it will draw you closer to the one who loves you most.

There is this idea out in the world that if you just have enough wealth, resources, or power, you can avoid the deepest, hardest pains of human life.

But that simply isn't true.

Take an example from history, Julius Caesar.

By the end of the Roman Civil War, he was the most powerful human being in the land, probably in the entire world.

And at that moment, he could have destroyed his enemies, but in the case of Marcus Junius Brutus, he decided to show mercy.

He forgave Brutus for being on the opposite side during that civil war and not only forgave him but welcomed him into his own inner circle.

You see, Brutus and Julius Caesar knew each other very well.

Julius Caesar was about 15 years older than Brutus and had been carrying on a years-long affair with his mother.

There are some historians that believe Caesar was maybe treating Brutus a bit like his own son.

Caesar poured favor out upon Brutus.

Within a very short time, Brutus rose to the second highest office in the land, praetor, and he did that without going through the natural progression of offices that most people went through at that time.

So you can imagine Caesar's shock when on March the 15th, 44 BC, he went into the Senate.

He was attacked by several conspirators, and he saw Brutus among him.

There's one historian that says that Caesar valiantly fought off his attackers, but when he saw that Brutus was there also attacking him, he gave up and accepted his fate.

There's a tradition that says Caesar cried out in Greek, you too, child, before he succumbed to his wounds and died.

Betrayal by someone close to us is the most painful, one of the most painful things a human being can ever experience.

And it can happen to anyone, regardless of how much power, wealth, or resources you may have.

And perhaps you have had a brutus in your life, someone you trusted, perhaps even loved, and yet they have turned against you and become an enemy set on destroying you.

Now I'm not referring to times when someone has made a mistake and then hurt you.

We all do that.

We've all had that happen to us.

I'm talking about a time when a friend becomes your enemy.

And please understand, my goal today is not to bring up painful emotions for you.

My goal is to help you.

And my prayer is that as we dig into God's word together, God will help us to meet betrayal, if it should ever happen, with faith.

And to guide us along the way, let's dig into Psalm 55.

Now, as we open up to Psalm 55, we see that the heading there tells us that this is another Psalm written by David.

And again, he is lamenting to God about trouble he's experiencing because of an enemy.

But this time there is a sharper point to the pain.

David writes, if an enemy were insulting me, I could endure it.

If a foe were rising against me, I could hide.

But it is you, a man like myself, my companion, my close friend, with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship at the house of God as we walked about among the worshipers.

A close friend has betrayed David.

And though not identified in Psalm 55, biblical accounts suggest that Ahithophel, David's wisest and most trusted advisor, is that friend.

You see, Ahithophel's advice was highly regarded.

In 2 Samuel, we read, now in those days, the advice Ahithophel gave was like that of one who inquires of God.

So it's almost like he's a prophet.

Ahithophel's advice helped David to establish his rule over the twelve tribes of Israel after Saul died.

And more than an advisor, Ahithophel and David shared sweet bonds of friendship and intimate times of worshiping God together.

But when Absalom declared himself as king, this is David's son, David and the royal court hurriedly fled from Jerusalem to save their own lives.

And along the way, David received the devastating news that Ahithophel, not only his son, but Ahithophel had betrayed him, joined in Absalom's rebellion, and was now serving as his advisor.

Ahithophel's wisdom, which had been a great blessing and support to David, now became a deadly threat to him.

Realizing this, David sent Hushai, a loyal advisor, back to Jerusalem to counter Ahithophel's advice to Absalom.

When Ahithophel advised Absalon to immediately muster soldiers to pursue and destroy David while he was weak and on his back foot, Hushai suggested waiting and forming a larger national army from the entire twelve tribes.

Absalom accepted Hushai's advice, and this gave time for David to rest, regroup, and reorganize his fighting forces.

Realizing that his advice was not being heeded, Ahithophel went home, put his affairs in order, and hanged himself.

Now that's a historical overview of what happened.

But in Psalm 55, David shares what this betrayal was like for him personally.

He writes, My heart is in anguish within me.

The terrors of death have fallen on me.

Fear and trembling have beset me.

Horror has overwhelmed me.

He longs to flee from his situation and find rest in the wilderness, but even when he does that, there is no rest, for he cannot escape the repercussions of Absalom and Hithophel's betrayal.

Those repercussions impact not only David, but also Jerusalem and the entire nation.

David prays, Lord, confuse the wicked, confound their words, for I see violence and strife in the city.

This bombshell of betrayal is radiating waves of distress and destruction through the life of David and through all the lives of all those around him.

Now, betrayal is different from the other kinds of challenges we face in life.

When a loved one dies, we experience grief and loss.

But with betrayal, there is that and more.

With betrayal, someone whom we led into our heart and trusted has turned against us.

Relational truths we trusted and relied upon as true have proven to be false.

It feels like our world has shattered and crumbled down around us.

Trust, which is essential to navigating through life, has been destroyed.

And we may wonder, how can I carry on when this relationship that I thought was true and trusted has turned out to be a lie?

How can I ever trust myself to know what is true and false again?

How can I ever trust enough to let someone get close to me again?

And on top of the deep, intense pain we feel, there are often decisions that need to be made.

Our world has been reordered and we need to respond.

Even with his heart and anguish and the terror of death upon him, David has to make crucial life and death decisions about how he would respond to the rebellion.

And through no fault of his own, his world had dramatically changed, and he had to quickly change to survive in that new world.

And making important timely decisions is not easy for us to do when our emotions and our entire life is in turmoil.

But David gives us a pattern to follow.

First, he turns to God.

Listen to my prayer, O God.

Do not ignore my plea.

Hear me and answer me.

And as he cries out to God, David names the fear and the pain in his heart and the reasons for that fear and pain.

My thoughts trouble me, and I am distraught because of what my enemy is saying, because of the threats of the wicked.

For they bring down suffering on me and assail me in their anger.

David is pouring his heart out to God.

And then after he pours his heart out to God, David recenters himself in his faith in God.

You see, betrayal is like a bomb that goes off in the building of our life, and much of the up, the above-ground structure has been destroyed, and that's devastating to us.

But eventually we must sort through the debris, uncover the foundation that remains, and then rebuild upon that foundation.

For David, that foundation is and always has been God's faithfulness.

Despite what other human beings may do to us, God is always trustworthy and true.

David writes, as for me, I call to God, and the Lord saves me.

Evening, morning, and noon, I cry out in distress, and he hears my voice.

He rescues me unharmed from the battle waged against me, even though many oppose me.

It is here in God that we find the solace and the strength we need to carry on after a devastating betrayal.

So, what does all of this mean for us?

Well, first we need to begin by realizing that the world in which we live, our Western secular culture, which surrounds us and strongly influences how we think and feel, is bankrupt when it comes to suffering and offers us no real hope.

In his book, Walking with God Through Pain and Suffering, Timothy Keller writes, All other cultures make the highest purpose of life something besides individual happiness and comfort.

But in the strictly secular view, suffering cannot be a good chapter in your life story.

It's only an interruption of it.

For in this Western secular worldview, the only thing to do with suffering is to avoid it at all cost.

Or if it is unavoidable, manage and minimize the emotions of pain and discomfort as much as possible.

So first we need to turn away from what is considered normal understandings of life in general and relationships in particular.

Human relationships are a vital part of our life in this world, and when they are going well, they can be a great blessing to us.

But when we take a good thing, something that gives us joy and pleasure, something that's a gift to us from God, and make it into an ultimate thing, then we've crossed over into idolatry and set ourselves up for a devastating fall.

So we thank God for our human relationships.

And we enjoy them, we celebrate them, and we savor them.

But we also hold them loosely with the awareness that drift or deceit or death will bring all of our relationships in this world to an end someday from a human perspective.

At the same time, we keep our tightest grip on the relationship we have with God, and we practice living with this, our relationship with God, as the foundation of our life.

We do not deserve this relationship in any way.

It is a totally free gift given to us by God, the Son Jesus Christ, who came into this world and became fully human to save us.

And because he loves us, Jesus lived a sinless human life.

And though he did not deserve or cause suffering in any way, he willingly endured all the pain that we experience as human beings, including the pain of betrayal.

The betrayal of David by Ahithophel echoed in a much greater way centuries later when Judas Iscariot betrayed Jesus.

Jesus chose Judas to be one of his twelve disciples.

He treated Judas like a close friend and trusted him to carry the money that the group needed as they traveled throughout the land.

And yet Judas sold Jesus into the hands of his enemies for 30 pieces of silver and betrayed him with a kiss.

This time there was no intervention from his heavenly father, and no loyal advisor for Jesus to intervene on his behalf.

The worst that could happen did happen to Jesus.

He was beaten, flogged, condemned, and nailed to a cross to suffer and die.

And Jesus' followers were shattered.

They thought he would be the one to restore God's people.

But now it looked like evil had won, and their hope was destroyed.

But then came that first Easter Sunday morning, and with it news that Jesus was alive.

He had risen from the dead, and with days, within days he ascended into heaven to be crowned Lord over all creation.

Jesus defeated death and rules over all things for us.

And this means that not only do we have forgiveness for all of our sins and life forever with Him, but it also means that our King Jesus has ensured that the worst pain of human life, betrayal, will not destroy us.

With our life centered in Him, Jesus can use our deepest pain to give us a richer, fuller life and enable us to comfort and bless others.

And we know that's true because Jesus has gone through the pain of betrayal for us.

Now, in the book I mentioned earlier, Walking with God Through Pain and Suffering, Tim Keller ends each chapter with a real story of someone who walked with God through pain and suffering.

And at the end of the first chapter, the story is from a woman named Emily, whose husband left her and their four children for another woman completely out of the blue.

And Emily in her story describes the deep pain and the devastating consequences that impacted her and the children.

Children are angry and confused.

Emily has to sell the family home, but she doesn't know where they are going to move, and that sale may end in a foreclosure.

And yet, despite all this, Emily writes that she feels truly blessed.

As she starts with her perception of God, prior to her husband's betrayal, she writes, When I needed God's comfort, the image in my head was me clinging to Jesus and Him hugging me.

My image now is just me completely collapsed and him carrying me.

And it is awesome.

She describes her as experience as being like in a race that you are running and hitting a mud pit.

The mud weighs you down, and each step is painful, and yet you must go through it.

But then ahead in the distance, you see a wall of cleansing rain that will wash away all the mud, and then beyond that, the sun is shining.

She continues the person you will be there will be stronger with more understanding of how to run this race and with satisfaction and peace.

Yes, that person is tired, but they are also energized by the experience.

I can't wait to use what God has taught me.

I can't wait to learn more.

I've explained it to my children like this.

In every fairy tale, there is always a tragedy.

And the protagonist faces that adversity, overcomes it, and thrives because of it.

God is giving us our fairy tale.

What do you see at the end?

Dear friends, the challenge that I'm setting before you today is this: to respond to Jesus and his incredible love for you by centering your heart on him.

Consider all that he has done for you, the perfect human life he lived for you, his suffering, his death, his resurrection, and his ascension to rule over all of creation for you.

Realize that he not only hugs and walks with you, he also carries you when you have no strength left.

He is giving you your own personal fairy tale.

And in the end, it will be very, very good.

Amen.

Let's pray.

Dear Jesus, we thank you for your loving presence with us and all that you did for us, all that you went through to draw us closer to you and fill us with the life that you have for us.

But if it should happen, we ask, Lord, that you would be our strength, our comfort, and our solace, and that you would carry us through whatever lies before us.

In your precious name we ask this, and all God's people said, Amen.

If you have enjoyed this podcast and would like to support the work that we are doing at Walnut Grove Lutheran Church of leading people into a growing relationship with Jesus, please go to WGLC.org/slash donate.

Any gift that you would like to give will be greatly appreciated.

Thank you and God's blessing.