BLESS, Part 2: Practice of Listening

Welcome to the Lookout Weekly Podcast.

Church of the Lookout is a full Colorado.

Growing in this family and living on his fish.

Transport the world.

So now we help me welcome up, Pastor Piper, to bring the message.

And since we're in the blessing series, I thought you could just join me in blessing her as she brings the word.

So we just bless you, Pastor Piper.

We bless what the Lord has implanted in you and the way that you're going to bring it forth with power and with fire.

And God, we just bless this vessel of yours.

God, we bless the words that you've given her, and we bless the hearts of those who are in this room and listening online to be good soil to receive the word that you want to bring forth, God.

We thank you.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Thanks, Tiana.

So before we jump into the word this morning, I have to do two things.

First, I have to honor my mama because it's her birthday today.

She's not here with us.

She lives in Indiana.

So I don't get to be with her on her birthday, but I do get to honor her publicly because she's the one that taught me to love music.

She's the one that taught me how to worship.

She's the one that led me to the Lord through music, and my dad led me in the word, and it was beautiful.

So I just want to honor you, Mom.

If you watch this, we love you.

Happy birthday.

She usually does go back and watch when we tell her we've preached.

So, and they've got it, there's four of us, and we all preach.

So they've got sermons to keep up with.

All right.

So happy birthday, Mom.

And one more thing that I need to do is we have a birthday right here in our own community.

One of our team members this week, Blaise Cooper, our tech support, had a birthday this week as well.

Blaze, we love you and we appreciate all that you do for us.

And I just wanted to say happy birthday to him because he does so much, you guys, that none of us get to see because it's all behind the scenes kind of stuff.

So, and we believe in honoring people in this house, yeah?

Right?

Because to honor someone is to honor the deposit of Jesus in them and it's to honor him as well.

So we're gonna honor each other.

We're gonna honor him through honoring each other.

And Blaise, we honor you and we love you.

So happy birthday.

Everybody love on him as you see him.

Blaze, can you wave?

For those who don't know, Blaise, this is Blaise.

He's great, you guys.

He's not only an awesome team member, but a good friend too.

So all right.

Good morning.

Everybody looks a little bit like what's just happening.

She's doing like Chuck E.

Cheese shout-outs from the stage this morning.

Like, hey, it's somebody's birthday in here, right?

Sorry, guys.

I just love people and I love to love on people, so we're doing it.

All right.

Good morning, guys.

So we're gonna jump in.

Last week, Pastor Luke led us into the series that we're gonna do just for the month of June.

We're doing this series called Bless.

And we're going, we're diving into the word and we're just exploring what the word has to say about how we as a people can live as a conduit of blessing to the world around us.

Sounds like a good idea, yeah?

Okay, I love interactions.

So lots of like, yes, amen, or that's garbage.

Anything is fine.

We'll just talk about that one after, but it's fine.

I just love the interaction.

I'm a verbal processor, guys.

I need people to process with me as we go.

All right.

So last week Luke talked about bless, not just bless as our sermon series, but also the actual act of blessing.

The actual act, the practice of laying on of hands, speaking blessing over one another, and the reality that every heart, every human heart craves blessing.

Right?

And it was really great.

Go back and listen to it if you missed it.

But this week we're gonna move on into the next practical step, just a practice of blessing the world, and we're gonna talk about listening.

What it looks like and what it means to listen, not only to listen well, but to listen the way Jesus listened.

Okay?

Right now we live in a cultural reality where there are voices everywhere.

Yeah?

It takes a whole like 30 seconds, maybe less, to get onto social media, start scrolling Facebook or Instagram, and you are bombarded by people vying for their own voice.

Everyone wants to be heard.

Everyone is saying, hey, I have something important to say, and you should listen to me and hear all the reasons why, and this is the agenda, this is what we should all be about.

No, this is what we should all be about.

And there's just voices coming from every direction.

Everybody's fighting to find their voice, to have their voice be heard, or if they're not advocating for their own voice, they're advocating for someone else who they believe their voice was stolen from them.

Right?

How many of you have experienced this?

Right?

And I'm not saying that's a bad thing.

We should have voices, you guys.

We should advocate for those who don't have voices.

But I just wonder, in this world where everybody is so busy finding their voice, how many of us are taking the time to train our ear?

Right?

Because we're real busy talking a lot.

Worst offender.

But sometimes we're not really that great at listening.

And we're especially not really that great at listening the way that Jesus would listen.

Let's pray.

Jesus, we love you and we need you.

Lord, would you tune our ears to hear you even this morning, even now?

We surrender to you all that is to be said this morning, God.

Let your voice come forward.

Have your way here, Jesus.

As we sang this morning, Lord, our hearts are open.

Come, Lord, and have your way.

In Jesus' name.

Just a side note, one of my favorite prayers, you guys, is just to pray, hey Jesus, I love you and I need you.

Amen.

Just a little helpful hint.

When you're driving and life feels crazy, Jesus, I love you and I need you.

Amen.

Okay?

It's just it's a great prayer.

I almost did that now, and then I felt like, no, I won't do that right now.

So all right.

A few months ago, if you haven't been with us for that for a couple of months now, we just changed our name from Vine Life Church to Church of the Lookout.

And we did that back in March.

We did that not because we were bored of Vine Life, the name, or because we were departing from our roots.

We actually really love our roots in this house.

We love all that God has deposited through all the generations and all the iterations of leadership in this house.

And we didn't do it because we're looking for some kind of new vibe or something for the vine for the community.

But we did it in a direct response to an invitation we felt the Lord had given to us as a leadership.

See, we felt an urging of the Holy Spirit that he was drawing us into a new season and that we were to put a name to it and respond.

And in putting a name to it, we were to be known by a new name in this new season.

And so we went from being Vine Life Church, which is beautiful, to being Church of the Lookout, which is also beautiful.

And that invitation that we felt was the Lord drawing us to come to a higher perspective, to live at a higher understanding, looking out at the world around us, perceiving the things that God is doing in the world around us, not just within us, although that's important, and not just within our community, but also to the world beyond, and perceiving with heaven what is God doing and how do we as his people get to help him facilitate it on earth?

Amen?

So we are a people that have been called, especially in this season.

There's a unique anointing on the season.

We're being called to learn how to look out in a new way with him.

Okay?

And that's a part of why we're doing this series called Bless, because we want to be a blessing, but sometimes we have to be reminded what that looks like to be a blessing, right?

We can do a lot of work, but if that work isn't aligned with this with the move of the Holy Spirit in the moment, it may not have the wind at its back the way that we might need for the transformation we're looking for.

Okay?

So we're learning as a people, how, Lord, do we look out with you and be a blessing?

Shortly after we changed our name, we had some friends come, Craig and Chris Westhoff.

And Chris was with us for the women's retreat.

How many of you were at the women's retreat and just had a great time with Chris, right?

She's awesome.

She's super fun and just she just has this great heart and she laughs so easily.

I really, really love her.

And then her husband, Craig, who's also a really awesome man of God, and has this big booming voice that he speaks from.

Do you guys remember Craig?

And he came and shared with us, and he actually spoke on this very topic: listening, why listening matters, how listening well transforms the world.

And he said to us in that conversation, he said, Okay, look out, church.

What if there is no looking out without first listening?

What if to look out we must first look out with our ears?

What if looking out?

What if listening is looking out with your ears?

And then he quoted and he told us that listening is one of the first moments that love is expressed.

That to be able to love well, we have to learn to listen well, because we cannot love if we don't listen.

Amen.

Have you guys ever experienced moments when you're like, I just, I know that this person loves me, but I'm not feeling loved right now because I don't feel like they're listening to what I'm trying to say to them.

Right?

Just me?

No, okay.

We've had those moments, right?

So to love well, we must learn to listen well.

And he quoted David W.

Augsburger who said, being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person, they're almost indistinguishable.

When you ask somebody, why do you feel unloved, when they're feeling unloved in a moment, you ask them why?

Why do you feel unloved?

Well, I don't feel like you're listening to me.

So often those are synonymous with each other, right?

And I would add that in order for us to listen well to others, we must first learn to listen well to the Holy Spirit.

Because there's something about the way that the Holy Spirit listens through us that empowers us to listen at a at a higher perspective.

Right?

So if we want to listen well to the people in the world around us, Lord help us learn then to listen well to you first.

See, I don't have any vain imagination that in my whole 41 years of life, I've got something so remarkable and so profound to say just within myself that if I just had my voice, that suddenly the whole world's gonna change.

I just, and I'm not saying I don't have a valuable voice, I'm just saying I don't think that my voice is quite enough to change the world at the level it needs.

Yeah?

Like within myself, on my own, by myself, I just don't have that.

I've only got 41 years of Indiana and Colorado and a few places in between, and I just don't have what the world is desperately seeking, but I do have the Holy Spirit.

And He does have something that the world is desperately seeking.

So if I can learn for just even a little bit how to stop vying so hard for my own voice and listening closer to his voice, I might have something worth saying.

Right?

All right.

Jesus said something like this to the disciples in Luke 14, 34 through 35.

Jesus said, Salt is good, but if it loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again?

It is fit neither for the soil nor for the manure pile.

It is thrown out.

He who has ears, let him hear.

That's a little bit harsh.

Like that salt that you claim to have, when it loses its saltiness, it's not even worth the manure pile anymore.

Like I was like, oh, okay, you know, felt a little like, oh, zing.

All right, got it, got it, Lord.

Right?

But it's true, when we speak from places of our own experience, but that's not empowered by the Holy Spirit, we may just be missing what the moment really calls for.

Okay?

So as a people who are devoted to following Christ, can we be a people that not only come with our own ideas of who he is, but actually represent him to the world?

Are you following me?

Okay.

So to have a voice with power, let's have a voice that's empowered by the Holy Spirit.

But to do that, we have to learn to listen.

Amen?

All right.

So in our vision statement, we just said this vision statement together.

We are learning, or we are saying that we are people who Jesus is our vision and that we abide in his presence, grow in his family, live on his mission to what?

Transform the world?

How?

That's right.

So we are saying, we at the lookout, Lord, we believe that you are our vision and that if we align with you in these ways, that we will actually see transformation in the world through awe-inspiring love.

Amen?

Okay.

So what if, in order for us, look out, what if, for us to see the world transformed with awe-inspiring love, what if we have to learn first to love in a way that actually inspires transformation?

Okay?

It's real easy to say, I want to see the world inspired with awe or transformed with awe-inspiring love, but I don't really want to love like in a way that's awe, like that's inspiring.

Right?

It's easy to say that and hope that they're just getting it through osmosis.

Like, oh, if we just kind of exist, then suddenly the world will change.

Well, I have to say, I don't see that that's how Jesus led us.

If we want to see the world transformed with awe-inspiring love, we must love in a way that inspires transformation.

Okay?

So how do we do that?

And we're left with this question: how do we become a people whose presence makes way for the transforming love of Christ?

Amen?

Okay.

My answer to that question is we learn to love like he does.

We're gonna move to Luke 18, verse 35 through 43.

Luke 18:35–43

And we're gonna look at the way that Jesus loved.

Okay?

And guys, I had the hardest time narrowing in on just one story because the love of Jesus is so profound, it's so beautiful, and it's all throughout this word.

So when I was preparing this message, it's like, Lord, how am I supposed to only tell one story about you?

There's so many ways that you love.

And I felt like he led me to this scripture.

So, Luke 18, 35 through 43.

It says this, As Jesus approached Jericho, a blind man was sitting by the roadside begging.

When he heard the crowd going by, he asked what was happening, and they told him, Jesus of Nazareth is passing by.

And he called out, Jesus, son of David, have mercy on me.

And those who led the way rebuked him and told him to be quiet, but he shouted all the more.

I love that.

Jesus, son of David, have mercy on me.

And Jesus stopped and ordered the man to be brought to him.

When he came near, Jesus asked him, What do you want me to do for you?

Lord, I want to see, he replied.

And Jesus said to him, Receive your sight.

Your faith has healed you.

Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus, praising God.

When all the people saw it, they also praised God.

So here's Jesus walking along the way with crowds surrounding him.

And it was in a busy city and a loud space.

He was near a market space.

We know that from the context before.

So it's a loud place, but he hears this voice calling out to him, Jesus, son of David, have mercy on me.

And first of all, I just have to say I love the boldness of this blind beggar.

Amen?

Because sometimes you're stuck in a situation and you can't see the way forward and you don't know what's going on, and it's going to require a boldness to say, I am willing to put myself forward and to cry out to Jesus with all I'm worth, and I don't care what voices tell me to be silent, I'm going to cry out to him until he stops and sees me.

Okay?

It's okay to get loud with Jesus sometimes.

Don't be disrespectful, but it's okay to go, Jesus, please God.

Because he loves you and he will respond.

So here's this blind beggar, and he's crying out, Jesus, son of David, have mercy on me.

And what does Jesus do?

He doesn't commission one of his disciples, hey, go take care of that guy.

He doesn't say, um, could somebody get that guy to be quiet?

He doesn't just go, eyes open in Jesus' name, and keep on his way.

Right?

He could have.

He raised people from the dead from across cities and spaces.

He didn't have to go to the man, but he stopped.

He stopped and he drew near to the man.

When Jesus meets a person in need, over and over and over and over again in Scripture, we find that Jesus always stopped.

Always stopped, asked the question, listened, and then responded in compassion.

He was never too busy for the one he felt called to.

In fact, in other places we'll find in Scripture, he goes out of his way to go meet those who were the most unlikely for him to meet.

Jesus would stop, he'd ask questions, he listened, and he'd respond in compassion.

See, Jesus had this way of not only knowing he was the all-knowing God, he had a way of not only knowing what they needed, but giving them the dignity of their voice being heard.

He did not have to look at the blind man and be like, I wonder what he might want.

Right?

Anybody passing by could have just assumed that guy probably would like his eyes to be opened.

Right?

But Jesus didn't listen with assumption.

He listened and gave the per the blind man the dignity of his voice.

He said, What do you want from me?

And that blind man was able to say, I just want to see.

And then Jesus responded in compassion, and then the fruit of that was what?

Not only the blind man then began to praise the Lord, but all who saw it began to praise the Lord.

See, when we stop and listen and love the way Jesus did, it doesn't just impact the person that we're loving well, it actually has fruit that multiplies because that's the nature of the kingdom of God.

Amen.

So if we want to see a world transformed by awe-inspiring love, loving one well could mean the multitude becoming loved well.

But we have to stop and we have to listen and allow Jesus to move us in compassion.

About a month ago, I was driving into Boulder, and as I was coming, I was on 66 now, so I was coming down, or sorry, Highway 36.

And as I was coming down into Boulder, I looked out and it was beautiful.

And I was just, hey Lord, this is so beautiful.

And suddenly I just got washed over in the love of Jesus for the people of the city of Boulder.

And suddenly my heart just started pounding, and there was this deep love that surged over me.

And it was the love of God for the brokenness that was happening, the lonely hearts, the broken people, the lost and the confused in Boulder, and I began weeping.

And I couldn't help but weep.

We actually, I was actually on my way up to an all-day meeting with our lead team, and I got there and was like, sorry, guys, I've got a mess.

And they were like, Oh, that's so great.

Yes, Lord, you know, and it was great.

And they partnered with me in prayer, but the Lord had moved something so deeply in me that I couldn't stop weeping.

And I kept having these moments of weeping.

And so I started praying, Lord, would you lead us in the boulder?

Would you teach us your ways?

Would you show us how to love them well?

God, would you give us the anointing of an evangelist to go out and share your word and your hope with the lost and with the hopeless?

Lord, would you give us the mindset to perceive your strategies and to move out into the world and to carry your word into the all of boulder that everyone would hear?

And I started praying all the prayers that I knew to pray, because I'm a pastor and I've read these things and I know how to pray.

And I would be the Lord, would you?

And I was praying from an honest place, and I believe the Lord honored those prayers.

But at one point I was praying this and I just felt the Lord almost like he put his hand on my shoulder and said, Piper, wait.

And I got quiet and I said, Yes, Lord.

And he was like, if you want to see the world transformed with awe-inspiring love, if you want to see the broken hearts of Boulder met, stop asking me for a greater evangelistic anointing and stop asking me for missional mindsets and all the things you're saying, and start asking me for a greater sense of compassion.

Start asking me to take you deeper in compassion.

Because where you are compelled by compassion, those things will follow.

And it sent me on this journey to study the life of Jesus in the way that he loved with compassion.

Church, people's lives aren't transformed because we have such a great teaching.

People's lives are transformed because they're met by the love of Jesus.

We don't transform their lives, he transformed their lives, but we get to partner with him in loving them well in such a way that it actually draws them to the one that we call our Lord and King.

Right?

And when we look at the life of Jesus, we see this again and again and again.

In Matthew 20, 32, he meets two blind men at a gate, and Jesus stopped and called to them, What do you want me to do for you?

And Jesus had compassion on them and touched their eyes.

And immediately they received sight.

In Mark 1.41, he meets a man with leprosy, and the man says, If you are willing, you can make me clean.

And the word says that filled with compassion, Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man.

And he said, I am willing.

Be clean.

And immediately the leprosy left him and he was cured.

In Mark 9, 22, a father comes with his son who was tormented by demons.

And he says, If you can do anything, have compassion on us and help.

And Jesus says, Everything is possible for him who believes.

And at this the father then declares, I do believe, and Jesus cast the demon out of the boy.

And in Luke 7, 13, Jesus comes across a widow whose son has just passed away, and it is her only son.

And it says, When the Lord saw her, his heart went out to her, and he said, Don't cry.

Then he went up and touched the coffin, and he said, Young man, I say to you, get up.

And the dead man sat up and began to talk, and Jesus gave him back to his mother.

In every one of these cases, Jesus meets someone in need, and he is compelled by compassion to respond.

In fact, over 17 times in the New Testament, the word in Greek, and forgive me, this is a crazy word.

It's called splachomai.

And it probably butchered that.

But over and over again, 17 times in the New Testament, that word in Greek is used to describe how Jesus moved out, what was moving in Jesus and why he responded.

And that the beginning of that word, splachna, it actually means internal organs.

So when you break this word down, it means it's a visceral, gut-wrenching, emotional response that's so strong when is moved to physical action on behalf of another.

Jesus could not help but respond to them because he was moved so deeply that he felt it in his gut.

That's the kind of compassion that Jesus meets, comes to, carries when he comes to someone in need.

Now I have to make a distinction here.

Because in our culture right now, thanks to Brene Brown and the mental and emotional health and well-being uprise, which we're grateful for, amen.

The awareness of knowing how to care for people and mental and emotional health, right?

Thanks to the to this uh this awareness rising in our in our culture, we have some words that are trending right now, and one of them is the word empathy.

And Brene Brown even has this cartoon that she does when she sh or that she shows when she's talking about empathy, and it's um it's this cartoon with these three little animals, and they're walking along together, and one of them falls in a hole, and then another one comes over and looks over the hole and says, Ooh, ew, sorry about it.

That must be rough.

Man, I bet that's the pits, right?

Just kidding.

It doesn't say that.

I just had to throw a bad dad joke in.

All right, so he looks over and he calls down, ooh, sorry about your luck.

And she says, that is pity.

That's not empathy.

And then in the cartoon, another, there's another character, I think it's a bear, and he crawls down into the hole with the with the one that fell in, and he comes over next to it, puts its arm or his arm around it, and says, Hey, that was scary.

That was hard.

It's dark down here and it's lonely.

And I'm so sorry, but you are not alone.

I'm with you.

And she says, That's empathy.

And she makes the whole point of we have to be a people.

If we're gonna love other people well, we have to be a people that stop standing at the edge of someone's hole, looking in from a distance and going, ooh, sorry about it.

Thoughts and prayers, care emoji, right?

But sometimes we're gonna have to crawl into the hole and put our arm around them and go, hey, it's dark down here and it is scary.

And I understand how you feel, but you're not alone.

And I love that.

That is so true.

We need to be able to be with people in their darkness, and we have to be able to crawl into their space with them and love them well where they are and not just call to them from another space and call them up, right?

But when I read the life of Jesus, I see him take it one step further.

And as I was studying this, I was like, Lord, you have to help me understand this.

And I came across this study, and this is the pathway of this study that said this is how we interact with people in pain.

We can begin with pity, then move to sympathy, then engage in empathy, and be compelled by compassion.

See, pity is the, hey, I feel sorry for you space.

Sympathy, we have these up there.

Sympathy, go ahead and throw that one up, is I'm sorry for your loss.

It's meeting them with an actual, it's not just feeling sorry for them for a distance, but it's actually expressing an emotion.

It's feeling in a sorrowful state with them.

Empathy is I understand why you feel this way, and I'm here to listen if you'd like to talk about it.

It's crawling into the hole with them.

But compassion is this is so hard.

I do understand, and I want to help lift this weight off of you.

Jesus again and again would meet them.

He'd stop, he'd meet them, he'd crawl into the space with them, right?

He didn't bypass their pain and just give them an answer.

He met them in their pain, acknowledged their pain, or allowed them to acknowledge it to him.

And then he responded in compassion.

See, compassion in Brene Brown's little cartoon thing, compassion would have looked like the bear strapping on a harness and going, and here I have a way to help you out of this hole.

Would have been meeting him, hey, I understand, and I'm so sorry, and this is so hard.

And you guys, sometimes people, that's where they want to be met.

And they're not ready to crawl out of the hole.

But compassion looks like saying, and when you're ready, I've got a way out of this hole for you.

And then actually offering that help.

Amen.

You following me?

If we want to transform the world with awe-inspiring love, we must be compelled by compassion the way Jesus was compelled by compassion.

And we cannot be compelled by compassion unless we listen the way that Jesus listened.

Henry Nowen says this.

He says, Somewhere we know that without silence, words lose their meaning.

And that without listening, or without yeah, without listening, speaking no longer heals.

In order to love in a healing way, we have to first learn to listen in a healing way.

Amen.

So I learned this truth kind of the hard way.

Back in 2020, when all of our lives got turned upside down, I am still now and was then a mom of four kids.

And at that time, my kids were in second grade, fourth grade, sixth grade, and eighth grade.

Super fun ages to be all of a sudden thrust into our homes and having to learn how to homeschool for the first time.

It was great.

We're like, hey, spring break, ah, extra week of spring break, sweet.

And then they're like, take your kids and don't bring them back.

And we're like, What, whoa, I did not sign up for this, right?

How many moms were in that situation?

You're like, I didn't sign up for this.

Hold on, time, I want my money back, right?

I don't homeschool for a reason, right?

I don't know that I'm gonna be good at this.

And suddenly I'm found at home and I've got all four of my kiddos, and they go to two separate schools, which means that we had two different online login um school systems, plus like 27 different platforms that we had to learn how to log into, plus, I don't know, only a hundred different ways of learning how to log in to get to this page with that folder to this folder within that attachment, and then you have to print it for each kid.

And I was like, oh my gosh, I can't do this.

And in fact, you had to, because two of my children were in middle school at this time, they had multiple students, multiple teachers.

They each had seven teachers each.

So at one point in time, I had our schedule all like put up, and I was looking at it, and I realized, oh my gosh, between the hours of 9 a.m.

and 2 p.m., I have 14 separate check-ins for for my four children, and there's only about 20 minutes at the most between any of the two check-ins.

How am I gonna do my own job?

Because I still worked at that time, right?

So I'm going, okay, I've got to make sure that they all get in, and we've got to remember all the passwords for them, and we had to go buy desks, and we had to find spaces in the house, and we had to do all the things, right?

And then I had to figure out how exactly to help them with their homework.

And if they didn't understand something, I was their teacher.

I got to help them with that.

And it was really a beautiful thing eventually, but in the beginning, it felt like brain damage.

I was like, I don't know what I'm doing.

Can somebody help?

And then I would turn into another mom and be like, and we all just kind of stood around like, what's happening?

Right.

And all through this, my wonderful husband, his job was still considered essential work, so he got to go to work every morning.

I was like, I'm so jealous.

And eventually he ended up finding a way to help me lift the load.

But in that first little season, it was rough.

They were confused, I was confused, teachers didn't know how to help us exactly because they were also in the process of learning, and it was chaos.

And I had one of my kids that kept coming to me in this time and kept saying, Mom, can I please just not log into my class?

Can I just like do the work and not have to go to the classroom check-in spaces?

I was like, no, no, dude, you have to go to class.

We're all doing this, we just gotta buckle up, we're just gonna do this together, right?

And then again, mom, please, I just I really don't want to go to class.

Can you just, can I just not have to sign in?

I'll do the work, I'll do extra work.

Just please don't make me sign in.

And I was like, no, come on, come on, buck up, you're gonna do this.

And after several times he stopped saying that to me, and then he would, I would say, hey, okay, it's your check-in.

All right, it's your turn, ready, go, go, go, right?

And then all the kids would go to their spaces and they'd get into their classes, and I assumed he was getting into his class every day.

And I get this email from his teacher saying, Hey, um, I just wanted to check in.

I noticed that your son hasn't been checking into class for the last several days or for the last week or so.

I wanted to make sure everything's okay.

And of course, my mama bear rises up and I'm like, What?

Son! And I get all ready to just lay into him.

What are you doing?

Not getting into class, you know.

We said I said, Son, what is going on?

Why do I why am I getting an email from your teacher saying you're not logging into class?

And he looked up at me, and at first he was a little bit nervous, and then he just dropped his shoulders and his eyes filled with tears, and he said, Mom, I just can't.

It hurts.

It hurts so much seeing my friends there and knowing I can't engage with them.

It hurts so much seeing my friends who I never got to say goodbye to and not knowing if I'll ever get to see them again.

It hurts so much to watch them on a screen and not get to interact with them and not know if I ever will get to interact with them again, and I'm scared that I'll never get to have these friends anymore.

Mom, it just hurts, and I'm so lonely.

And immediately all of my mama bear just fell and my heart broke.

I said, son, I'm so sorry.

And from there we got to find a way forward to help make more meaningful connections.

But see, I was so busy with my agendas of getting everybody in their classes, being the super mom.

I'm not gonna be the mom that misses it.

My kids are gonna thrive, we're gonna make it through.

I was so busy assuming that when he wanted to not have to go to class, it was because he just didn't want to have to be on a screen and sit still that long.

I was so busy judging that he was just being lazy, that I wasn't listening.

I heard him, but I wasn't listening.

It wasn't until I stopped and I listened with compassion that we were able to find a way forward for him.

And his heart was able to begin to heal.

I'd propose you guys that we do that more often than we realize.

I'm so thankful I had the moment to hear his heart, and that we didn't just bypass that moment and miss it altogether.

But how often do we judge or assume and miss the heart of the person that's actually speaking to us?

See, there are ways, if we're gonna listen with compassion, we need to pay attention to the things that war against us listening with compassion, right?

And there are some ways I want to point out to you.

In order to listen like Jesus, we must listen without these following things.

We must listen without judgment.

Judgment is when we listen to evaluate the other.

Listening for where they might be wrong and I might be right.

To listen like Jesus, we have to listen without assumption.

Assumption is listening for the evidence of what I already believe is true.

Jesus, when he met the blind beggar, he didn't just assume that he knew that he wanted to be healed.

He gave him the dignity of expressing his desire to be healed.

He didn't walk in assumption.

We have to listen without agenda.

Listening with agenda is listening with a predetermined outcome in mind.

The other thing that listening with agenda can do is listening for the opportunity for me to express my own opinions rather than listening to what you actually are sharing with me.

Listening just enough while I'm thinking about the thing I want to say next that actually I'm not hearing you at all.

I'm just prepping my response.

Right?

We've all right, if you're married, you know you've done this, right?

Come on, come on.

And then the last one is listening in a hurry.

This is when we listen just long enough to let us go on to the next thing.

Or it's when we don't stop and listen at all.

We have to become a people to learn how to stop and to listen without judgment, without assumption, without our own agenda and not in too much of a hurry.

If we want to transform the world with awe-inspiring love, we have to be able to listen with compassion.

And these things war against the compassion in our hearts.

They rob us of the opportunity for compassion.

And church, can I just poke at something a little bit for us as Christians too?

We don't have the best reputation for being a people that listen really well, do we?

No.

We don't.

Oftentimes, when I look at our world in our Christian communities, I'm finding people that exist in one of two camps.

They're either so completely set on I'm gonna transform the world that they forget how to love, or they're so set on I'm gonna love that they forget that love looks like allowing space for transformation.

See, we have this tendency to either move in with our judgments and our agendas and our assumptions and want to project into people what we believe they need to know in order for them to come to know Christ.

You know what?

You just need to hear more scripture, you just need to know that this is the better way to live, you just need to be corrected and you need to be told all the answers for how you're gonna get out of your depression, your anxiety, your frustration, your hurt, your pain.

Here's all the answers.

This is the way to go.

Just follow me.

Let's go, right?

I've got all the answers.

This is what scripture says, and we're gonna see you transformed.

And they're like, I don't want to be like you.

No thanks.

I'll take the next bus, you know, like we're not inspiring.

We've got an agenda to transform, but it's not very inspiring.

But then on the flip side, we also have this tendency to fall in the other camp where we're, hey, if everybody would just stop preaching so much and just love people so well and never, ever, ever confront them about anything, then they will just suddenly become a believer.

But love, the way Jesus loved, transforms people.

It invites them to something bigger and better than what they're in.

It doesn't leave them where they're at.

That looks like empathy sitting with you but never moving to compassion, never offering another way.

And I don't see that in Jesus.

He always offered another way.

When he met the woman who had been caught in adultery, he didn't just sit with her and go, man, it is hard.

Let's sit here among our rocks and let's just talk about it.

He didn't, right?

He loved her, he didn't judge her.

That's what everybody else was doing.

But he loved her and he said, Now get up.

I see you and I love you and I'm not going to condemn you.

Now let's get up and let's move.

Let's find a new way.

When he met the Samaritan woman at the well, he met her in honesty.

Yeah, this isn't your husband, is it?

No.

In fact, you've had five different dudes that aren't your husband.

But I'll meet you at the at the well.

I'll receive from you and give you dignity.

I'll listen to your story.

And I'll also let you know there's a better way.

I'm not leaving you at the well by yourself.

I'm going to give you another way.

And you guys, that woman went on to be one of the most gifted evangelists in her city or in her time.

When you read the stories about her from there forward, you actually find that she went and shared the truth of what she had experienced in the love of Jesus, and it changed the lives of her whole city.

Because she had been loved well enough that she wasn't just empathized with, but she was invited to something better without judgment, without assumption, without agenda.

We have to love not just by listening, but by embracing and walking forward together.

And the only way we can give a meaningful forward opportunity is by listening to the Holy Spirit because He's the only one that actually knows the way forward.

And I just want to say something right now.

Some of you in this room believe that you don't know how to listen to the Holy Spirit.

That you don't know how to hear the voice of God.

And I just want to say that is a lie from the pit of hell.

You have been given ears to hear.

You have a relationship with if you have a relationship with Christ, you have the gift of the Holy Spirit being able to awaken something in you to hear his voice.

You can learn, you can grow in it, but you already have the gift to hear his voice.

So we're just going to break that off in Jesus' name.

Amen?

Each one of you has been given the gift to hear his voice.

You are called by name and you are his own, and you can hear his voice.

And if you need help unpacking that, please feel free to come see myself, Dee Dee, Jeanette, or any of our ministry team members and other pastors and elders.

Come see us and we will walk with you in that process of learning how to distinguish and identify the voice of the Lord.

Are you with me?

Okay.

We're real quiet.

So Jesus loved.

He loved with compassion.

And we have the opportunity to be a people who learn how to find the middle, right?

If we're not supposed to just love the world, if we're not supposed to just be on an agenda of transformation and forsaking love, and we're not supposed to just love in a way that forsakes the need for transformation, how do we then become a people that love in a transforming way?

We listen.

We love with compassion.

We allow compassion to lead us because compassion of the love of Jesus welling up within you, the way that the love of Jesus welled up within me as I drove into Boulder, it will compel you and He will give you strategies, He will give you words, He will give you thoughts that are great to be able to bring them into another understanding of God's love for them.

He will meet you there when you are compelled by compassion.

What could it look like if, although the world is known, or the Christian world, our Christian communities are known, we kind of have this bad reputation, known for that judgmental, self-righteous driven, agenda-driven ways of relating to those who don't align with our thinking?

What would it look like if we, the lookout, I'm talking to you and me, you guys, not just the royal we, you and me, what would it look like if we became known for ability to listen with compassion the way Jesus did?

How many hurting and lonely and confused and hopeless lives could find hope and friendships and love if we stop and listen the way Jesus did?

I wonder, might it just be possible that if we learn to love people in this way, that we'll actually begin to see the transforming love of Jesus Christ, transforming the world with awe-inspiring love?

Like we say we want to.

I wonder, I just wonder how many one by one could be met with the love of Jesus if we learned how to listen the way Jesus listened.

Yeah?

So I want to give you a little challenge for this week.

Okay?

Are you guys up for a challenge?

Yeah?

Okay.

I want to give you a challenge this week.

Three things.

First of all, I want to challenge you to begin paying attention to how you're listening to the people around you.

When you find yourself in a conversation and they're sharing something that they're struggling with or something they need prayer for, or something that is a s that they're considering or trying to hear direction on, when you're listening to them, are you listening as as you listen to them?

Are you waiting, looking for an answer that you could have to help them solve all their problems?

Are you listening in a way that's like, well, I've got the right answer for you.

Let me just listen to you so that I can tell you all of my great wisdom that I have to offer you.

Or are you listening with compassion?

See, the way Jesus avoided the agenda-driven listening was he asked questions.

He listened with what we call around here compassionate curiosity.

He didn't assume that he knew what they wanted.

He invited them to share what was going on within them.

And he listened with curiosity.

Sometimes we can ask questions that we're asking specifically because we're wanting to lead them into a specific place of conversation.

These are called leading questions.

So did that make you feel sad?

See, I've just projected onto them an emotion instead of inviting them to share what they actually were experiencing.

Do you see that?

So instead of asking a question in that way, maybe the question is, how did that make you feel?

And maybe their answer is going to be embarrassed.

And suddenly you have an awareness of where they are that is not where you assumed they were, right?

So Jesus would ask questions.

I think it's like over 400 times in the Gospels, Jesus asks questions instead of giving direct answers.

Or maybe over 300.

I don't remember.

It's in my notes somewhere.

He would ask questions in response to people.

He didn't just assume things.

So when we're with people, pay attention to how you're listening.

And when your first instinct is to give advice, pause yourself and instead ask them a question.

Oh, I think I might lose my job.

Oh, well, I've got this other person that you could no.

Stop, pause.

Really?

Dude, I'm so sorry to hear that.

How's that feeling for you right now?

Let's not be so quick to have a solution that we forget to hear the heart of the person talking to us.

Yeah?

Sometimes they do need to be just heard in the moment.

So, first challenge, pay attention to how you're listening.

The second challenge, pay attention to how you listen to the Holy Spirit while you listen.

See, God gave us two ears.

My mom said this to me once.

God gave you two ears.

One is to listen to me, and one is to listen to Jesus.

And she was teasing, of course, but God gives us the ability to be presently listening to someone and also aware of his presence with us.

And listen for his heart.

Allow his compassion to rise up in you.

And for his great imagination, he's the creator of all.

He has more imagination than we ever could for how to help these people out of their hole, right?

So let's learn to listen both with compassion to them and also be listening to the Holy Spirit.

And it's okay, guys, wherever you are in the process of learning how to do that, it's okay.

Just start where you are.

It can be as simple as when someone's talking to you, you just say, God, I'm not really sure how to listen to both you and them.

Jesus, I love you and I need you.

Right?

So pay attention to how you're listening to them.

Pay attention to how you're listening to the Lord.

Just be mindful of that need.

And the third challenge I want to give you this week is take some time.

At least three times this week.

I want to encourage you, at least three times this week.

I challenge you, get before the Lord and say, God, would you increase my compassion?

Would you give me a deeper compassion for the broken and the hurting and the weary around me?

God, I love people, but I want to love them a way you do.

Would you increase my compassion for them?

Can we do that?

So we're gonna pay attention to how we listen to them.

We're gonna pay attention to how we listen to him, and we're gonna ask him to increase our compassion through this week.

Amen.

Alright.

So I had a couple of words this week as I was praying over this message that I'd like to share with you guys.

Is that okay with you?

Okay.

One of the words that the Lord gave me was, There are some that hold people more in prison than they do in prayer.

And I asked him, What do you mean by that, Lord?

And he said, There are some who are praying with an agenda for the people they love, and it's actually holding them captive or hostage to the desire, to their own agenda of what they want to see happen.

And it's not releasing my blessing over them to actually release them into the thing I have for them, which is different than they think it is.

When you're praying for people, it is easy to pray with what we believe is the agenda of God and pray in that space.

But there are some of us here that you have a loved one, that it may be for their salvation, it may be for their healing, it may be for a perspective shift, but you are praying, you've been praying in a certain way where you're praying specifically, Lord, would you change their mind about this?

Lord, would you just um confront them about this?

Lord, would you deal with this issue in their life?

And sometimes when we pray with that much of an of our own agenda in the mix, we actually can hold them hostage to our own desires for them.

So I just felt the Lord say, some of them need to know to pray in a releasing way.

Hold them in prayer, not in prison.

Okay?

And if that's you, it's you're going to feel the Holy Spirit impressing on your heart that that's you.

You'll know who it is you're holding in that way.

And all you have to do, guys, is just repent, Lord, forgive me for praying with my own agenda.

And teach me to pray in the way of your heart.

I release them to you.

I surrender them to you, Lord.

You alone know the best way to capture their heart.

Okay?

The other word I got was um that sometimes we believe.

Let's see, Lord, how do you say this?

That sometimes we believe by just perceiving the need of another that um that means that we are now the person assigned to meet it.

Okay?

Sometimes you will come across people who are in need.

I wonder how many people Jesus walked by that were also in need and he did not have the assignment to stop and meet them in that moment because God had given it to someone else.

I wonder how often Jesus had to see all of the needs around him and say, Lord, it's more than I have the ability to meet in my flesh because he was man.

How do you want to respond to this father?

And the father would lead him, and then he would, as he says, he would only do what he saw the father doing.

There are times there's a thing called compassion fatigue.

There are times where we carry the burdens of others that we were not intended to carry.

And I do believe there are a few in this room who are so burdened, who are weighed down so much right now by the needs of everybody around them that you feel that you feel like you're responsible to meet everyone's need.

Can I encourage you that Jesus has more than enough ability to meet the needs of the people around you?

You just listen to the assignment you've been given.

You ask him to lead you to the ones he's given you so that you can carry them well.

If we're always trying to listen to every person at all times, we will not be able to do that.

We are human, okay?

So pressure's off.

You don't have to be the listener for every person in your life.

Okay?

But there are some that God will bring you that he's asking you, would you listen to them with compassion?

And I'm gonna give you a way forward to help them, okay?

And if you're stuck in a space where you're having a hard time discerning, if you're to meet the need of someone, or if you're having a hard time knowing whether that need is something that you've been assigned, or that you are to just hold in prayer, or you to actually have a physical response to, bring in the community of God around you.

Bring in people who love you and love the Lord and ask them to help you pray through that, okay?

Okay.

Okay.

So I did feel like those two words were supposed to be released today, that there are some of you who you need to learn to surrender people in prayer and not hold tight to your own agenda as you pray for them, and others of you that need to know it's okay that you don't that you are not carrying every need that you come in contact with, okay?

But be listening, paying attention, and the Lord will lead you to the ones that He's given you an assignment for, okay?

You guys with me?

Is everybody all right?

How's everybody doing?

Okay.

So we're gonna pray.

And as we do, um, we're just gonna, I'm just gonna open up a space for you guys to just ask the Lord.

We're not gonna do a big ministry call, although if you do want prayer for healing, if you do need prayer for a situation or circumstance, we do have people here that will be down here to join you in prayer.

You're welcome to come up and receive prayer.

But this morning, I just felt like the response, the best response we can give to the Lord is Lord, teach me to learn to listen, and then let's take some time to listen.

Let's take some time to listen to him.

So I'm gonna pray.

And Graham, if you'd be willing to turn up the keys a little bit.

And while Josh plays, we're just gonna listen to the Lord and let him speak to us.

And then invite him to increase your compassion.

God, we love you.

Jesus, we love you and we need you.

Jesus, we do long.

We truly long to be a people who love in such a way that it inspires transformation around us, Lord.

That it inspires people to be drawn to the transformational love of Christ.

Lord, only you can transform them, but you invite us to partner.

So, Lord, would you help us to learn?

Would you teach us to listen in the way that you listened?

Would you teach us to be a people that aren't just one more voice trying to find our, trying to vie for our own voice, but actually are a people who have learned to listen with compassion, that we become safe for others, the way you are safe for those who are in need.

God, would you lead us forward to those you've given us to love well?

Lord, would you lead us to them and teach us to listen to them the way you listened.

And God, thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you, Holy Spirit, that we are not alone in learning this, that we do not carry the burdens of others, we surrender them to you.

God, thank you that we can come before you.

Holy Spirit, you have empowered us to listen the way Jesus did.

You've empowered us to meet people in their need and have an answer for them, Lord.

Have a hope that will not fade, that is not temporary, that is not faulty or weak.

Thank you, Holy Spirit, for your guidance and your friendship.

That we don't have to be everything for everyone, but we can love well.

Jesus, we give you our ears, teach us to listen to a sense that some of you, the Lord's kind of tapping on your shoulder and you're saying, Hey, those four things that were against compassion.

You need to repent for that.

You need to repent for listening with a judge with judgment in your heart.

Or for listening with an assumption or an agenda, or being too focused on the next thing that you forgot to stop and listen.

If that's you, just take some time to just repent.

Just ask him, Lord, forgive me and teach me the better way.

So caught up in what we perceive or believe to be the solution that we didn't listen to the hearts of the person.

We forgot to just meet them in love.

And Jesus, forgive us for the times that we even pray with an agenda.

Holding people more hostage to our agendas than we do lifting them up in prayer.

God, we surrender those to you.

Even now, God.

We surrender them to you.

Have your way in their life.

Meet them in the way only you can meet them, Jesus.

And teach us how to love them well.

Forgive us for not trusting you, Lord.

For trying to force your hand.

Lord, you're better than we think you are.

So we surrender these people that we love at your feet today, Jesus.

Have your way, have your way, have your way.

More than they were called to carry.

God, I pray for discernment to increase, that they could be aware of those you've called them to.

And Lord, I pray your ministry, Holy Spirit, would you minister to them to lift the weariness?

That they'd be refreshed and restored, that they could hear your voice.

That they'd have a renewed trust in you.

That it's not all on them, that you're big enough to handle all the needs that surround them, Lord.

And that they'd walk with you one step at a time, following your leading as you direct and order their steps, Jesus.

Thank you to lift off the weariness, lift off the heavy burden, Lord.

That they could love well and be loved well.

And Lord, I thank you.

Thank you, God, for your word.

Thank you, Jesus, for the way that you loved and the way that you listened and still do listen.

Teach us your ways, God.

Lead us in your ways.

And help us, Jesus, to truly be the people that love in a way that we may see the world transformed with your love, God.

We ask this in your holy name, Jesus.

Amen.

Amen.

It's a good word, wasn't it?

Of course, it's only a good word if we receive and we respond, right?

Let's stand.

If you're a guest here today and you're new, I'd remind you to stop by the Connect Center in the foyer and let yourself be seen.

Ministry team, could you come please?

You know, things happen in these mornings like this, and sometimes in it, something's deposited, something's awakened, something happens that we have a question or we need to talk with somebody.

We need to sort something out.

That's why this ministry team is here in part.

It's because of that.

If that's you today, take advantage of it and come and speak with somebody on that team.

Maybe there's a need for a release of healing.

Come to that team, come to an elder and receive that release of healing.

Now, before you do all that, please get your kids out of children's church, okay?

So we can let those teachers get released.

And don't rush out.

This is the moment.

It's not sunny out there.

We're not going surfing or anything.

We have a little bit of time.

Let's be together as a family.

Can we do that?

Oh, this Wednesday, Worship Wednesday, 7 to 9, in this room.

What a great time to be here.

I think Piper will be here, won't you?

Amen.

Yeah.

It would be a good time to be here.

So be together this morning, and I want to bless you, and I want to use the words that Paul wrote to the church in Philippi, because this is the beginning of our week.

We're only half a day into the first day of this week, and there's a whole seven days ahead out there for all of us.

Isn't that true?

So as you walk away with what's been deposited in you, what you've received, I want to bless you.

And I guess my hope is this that the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will keep your hearts and your minds guarded in Christ Jesus.

That as you go out this week, remember Piper's prayer.

Jesus, I love you.

And Jesus, I need you.

Amen.

We'll see you next week.

We'll see you Wednesday night.