Welcome and Hospitality | Trinity Talks Podcast

Well, good morning guys. Good morning. Good morning. It is such a pleasure to have you

joining me today on Pentecost Sunday. So welcome to Sally and John and Rupali to join us for

today's session of Trinity Talks. Now today I'm excited to have you, Sally, you being

the welcome and connections director here at Trinity, because I was hoping we could

talk about the theme of hospitality, which I know is such an important part of not only

our life here at the church, but also our lives in general. And Jesus calls us into

a life of hospitality. So I was hoping that together the four of us could unpack that

here today. How does that sound? Sounds great. Sounds good. We do the best we can. We do

the best we can and that's all we can hope for. But I did want to just before we get

started, if you were here with us during the first service, you would see that we are starting

to talk through the fruit of the spirit. And each week here at Trinity, we're going to

be sort of focusing and highlighting on a specific fruit. So I would be amiss if I didn't

ask you what your favorite fruit is. I love guavas. Oh, I was not expecting that. I love

a lot of fruit, but guavas are really special and not always easy to come by here in Canada.

That's right. In the way that you can experience the guava in a different culture, right? Where

it's fresh and yeah. Guava is for Sally. Okay. For me, it's mangoes. Mangoes. Well, just

a side note, you're going to want to make sure that you're here at Trinity next week

because mango is going to be our featured fruit. Wow. That's great. Mango exactly the

same. Really? Oh yeah. We're going to be fighting over the mangoes. We'll make sure there's

two mangoes at least for John and Rupali next week. And I'm sorry, Sally, I don't think

guava made the cut. That's okay. It's not a super common fruit, but maybe one of you

would have a mango recipe then to submit. Yeah, that's right. All right. We'll be waiting.

Now we need to continue on with the theme of fruit because I just want to have a lot

of fruit fun with you today. So Sally, beside you, you will see a yellow bag and it is my

Bananagrams game. And I'm not sure if anyone here has played Bananagrams and I promise

I'm not sponsored by Bananagrams, but if you've ever played this game, it's kind of like Scrabble.

There's a bunch of letters and you rearrange the tiles on a table. It's a fast paced fun

game. Literally just did an unsolicited plug for Bananagrams there. But I was hoping that

each of you could just draw a letter out of the Bananagrams bag and then tell us something

about yourselves that begins with or revolves around that letter. All right. So once you

got your letter, just pass it along. Perfect. If you spill the banana tiles, you will have

to pick them up. Here we go. I made it. Just open the bag really small, right? That's right.

I know. It wouldn't be the first time in our house, that thing all over the place. Well,

anyway, so each of you have your letter, take a look at your letter and maybe you could

just tell us a little bit about yourself with something to do with that letter. Wow. Okay.

All right. My letter is A. All right. You lucked out. Yeah. Which actually my maiden

name was Anderson. So Sally Anderson is very familiar to my ears. Maybe not to you. Part

of one of your initials growing up. And talking about initials, mine were S.A., which also

stands for South Africa, which is where I grew up. So A for Africa. A for Anderson. Yeah.

So have a heart for Africa. Wonderful. And A for effort for that answer. Well done. Cheers.

J for John. J for John. John, your name. Perfect. So tell me, what do I say about myself? Well,

I'm the Toll and Die maker. So I guess jigs would be in there because they're part of

what we do. We make jigs to guide steel and all that stuff when we're machining them and

that. Oh, that's great. Yes. We were talking before. You're very handy. So jigs. Okay.

In some aspects. We'll ask his wife. Okay, Rupali, what letter did you get? So I got

the letter O. Okay. And I can say that I'm 100 percent optimistic. Love it. And I definitely

like to stand out. So outstanding, I would say. So those are my two words. Optimistic

outstanding. You guys really rose to the occasion. Thank you. That was great. All right. What

a fun game. We'll have to bring that one back. So I do want to just get started talking a

little bit about hospitality now. And Sally, being the welcome and connections director

here, could you tell us a little bit about what that role entails? Sure. Yeah. So the

welcome and connections director role is basically what it sounds like. I have the privilege

of sort of coming alongside those who are new in our Trinity family and just along with

the amazing welcome team, which has about 60 people on it, the Trinity welcome team,

we want to welcome people. We want to make people feel like they've come home, that they

belong, that they're important, that they're seen. And also ultimately to welcome them

into the family of faith. So, you know, to introduce them to those welcoming arms of

Jesus. Yeah. And in terms of connections, usually that sort of the piece that follows

them. And so it's all about introducing people, inviting people, drawing them into the family

in whatever way they're ready for and in whatever way God has in store for them. So, you know,

this is an interesting part of the job is that really everyone is at a very different

space and place when it comes to how they like to be welcomed and connected. And so

just really discerning and listening to their stories and where they'd like to connect along

however many months or years it takes them to want to connect. So, yeah. I love that.

That really ties in with our sort of our theme here at Trinity is learning to love Jesus

in our own time. So I think that's really wise. And first of all, if you ever come into

the church, you might see Sally around our welcome desk, around the lobby. I'm just wondering

what motivates you in this role? So you're always there with a smile. You do such a great

job at, like you said, welcoming, but also connecting other people. So what gives you

that motivation? It's actually interesting because Elizabeth and I were talking about

this earlier in the week and I was glad for that conversation because I sort of thought,

oh, what does motivate me? I know I am motivated, but I didn't really know why. And so I took

some time to think about it, talk to Elizabeth. And I think actually my upbringing plays a

big part in my motivation as well as my faith. So I think in terms of upbringing, I grew

up in South Africa. At that time, apartheid was still the regime. So obviously a very

significant and large separation between whites and blacks and people of color. So simple

things like not being able to go to the same schools, not being able to marry a person

the opposite color of you, not being able to ride public transit together, all those

day to day things. It was very separate. And so I think then growing up in a Christian

family and learning about the love of Jesus and how Jesus welcomes all was in contrast

to my sort of political environment in South Africa. Yeah. So I think that must have done

something as a child to kind of like create that contrast for me. And then I would say

we actually moved and emigrated to Canada when I was 12. And so I was the newbie and

I was the new person on the block, right? And we actually moved quite a bit. So I would

say every four to five years we relocated. And so I really got lots of chances to be

the new person, new schools and classrooms and neighborhoods and churches and social

groups and extracurriculars. And so I think through me, like almost being forced to be

new, I now knew, okay, wow, there was sometimes that I was welcomed super warmly and there

was sometimes that I wasn't. And so again, just that contrast of what is it to actually

be welcomed genuinely into a situation where those people probably have known each other

for a really long time. Right. So I think just my upbringing has really sort of given

me that scaffolding for this role. And then of course, like just the way that Jesus welcomes

us, right? And just even looking at Jesus' life in ministry and how he welcomed so many

that really weren't in that culture usually welcomed, whether it was women, whether it

was lepers and people that were sort of shifted or pushed to the outskirts of society. And

he himself wasn't always welcomed, right? Whether it's they had a hard time finding

a manger for him. Right from the beginning. That's a great parallel. Yeah. Or him being,

you know, him and his family needing to flee to Egypt, you know, in his early years. And

then obviously the cross. So I think when we look at the life and ministry of Jesus,

it can't but inspire, you know, us to if we're following him and if we're trying to live

like him to try and be like-minded. I love that. So that's great. Well, thank you for

all you do, first of all, here at Trinity. It's my pleasure. It's my pleasure. And then

I'd love to just even just shift over to John and Rupali, who actually have come to Trinity

fairly recently within the last few months and within the year. I was wondering if each

of you could tell us your story of maybe where you were before you came to this church and

then also what your experience was when you came in through the doors. So feel free to-

Do you want to start? Okay. All right, Rupali, you're up. Okay. Thank you. So I'm fairly

new to Canada. It's been a few years that I'm here. And initially before coming to this

place, I was in London, Ontario. And unfortunately, I couldn't find a good community. And I was

pretty lonely there and quite sad and depressed in my life. And then that's when I thought

of moving out of that place and I moved in close to Toronto. And one of my friend Moses,

he used to be a part of this church and he has moved to the US now. But while talking

to him on the phone, he introduced me, he told me about this church and he introduced

me to Pradeep, Shireen and Cathy. And eventually I got connected to Sally and that's how it

all began. And I'm here now. It's been seven months. And just so everyone knows, we actually

had to pull Rupali off of the cameras. And she was working the cameras over there in

the sanctuary for our service. So you've gotten quite involved already. It's wonderful. All

right. And what about you, John? Oh, it was, I guess the seeds were planted a long time

ago with my grandfather. I never grew up in a church background at all. But he told me

things when I was very young about Jesus and how he was a carpenter. So I was down in the

basement and I would every Sunday be working on my woodworking. I always think about him

and think about what he told me and all that stuff. And I know I was baptized Anglican.

So I was like, okay, I'm going to check out, see if there's a Anglican church online. I

found this church online and just as I found it, a service was starting. So that's when

I started to watch it. And I was like, yeah, this is a place for me. I really thought,

okay, I'm going to definitely step foot in this place and see how I like it.

And look at you now, you're sitting here with headphones on having a conversation with us.

And I love that you brought up the word seeds because we were just talking about gardens

earlier in our service. And that's really what it is, the gardener.

Yeah. But my seeds were planted a long time ago and they just sprouted now. So that's

how it works, I guess, sometimes. That's right. We never know. Absolutely. So we're using

the word hospitality and I can already see it from a few different lenses here that you've

brought out. And I mean, even in the Bible, the apostle Paul, and I want to make sure

I quote this properly here, but in Romans 12, 13, Paul writes that we are called to

contribute to the needs of the saints and practice hospitality. So right there in the

Bible, we have this calling to do this form of practice. Now I'm wondering just from your

own perspectives, what are some of the challenges that we as a church may experience? And I'm

not just talking about you three or us four, but I'm talking about the church as a whole

in terms of practicing hospitality, even though we know that it's such a good thing. What

might hinder that practice, do you think? Well, for myself, I think it's just something

you have to practice on a daily. You don't leave it for church. You have to do it every

day. Like prayer, it's got to be done every day. And I think as you do it more and more,

it just becomes stronger and stronger. Like a muscle. Yeah, like a muscle, right? So if

you don't use it, obviously you're not very good at it. Or if you wait just till Sundays,

you're not going to get strong at it. But if you do it every day, like somebody that

works out at a gym, they do it every day or every other day. They're not going once a

week because you won't see any change that way. Yeah. Wow. Great. Just an opinion. But

that's what I think. The challenge is the church, I think the church does the best it

can, but I think really it's up to the individual to step up and practice it. Yeah. I love that,

John, because I think as much as we can have like a position for a welcome and connections

director or a welcome team, it really is all of our calling, right? So that every person

within our Trinity family is called by Christ to welcome and to practice hospitality and

to practice that radical hospitality like Jesus. So if we're all doing it and all motivating

and encouraging each other to sort of notice who in our midst might be new or might be

lonely or might be having a tough day, right? And I think hospitality can be extended for

sure to new people, absolutely. But also there's ongoing hospitality, right? So someone who

may have been coming here for years, sometimes it's surprising, they may not know that many

people, they may still need an introduction or an invitation. And maybe they're having

a particularly bad day or moment in their lives and they need to be noticed for what

they're going through as well. So I think, yeah, I love what you said about it's all

of our job. Yeah, it's, that's just an opinion. Yeah. And just to add on to what John and

Sally what they said, I believe that it also depends on the person. The person could be

a little bit ambivalent or introvert and those people definitely need more encouragement

and more push. So if we can just smile and open up to them, you know, we can get them

started, we can keep introducing them. So that's one thing that I noticed. And I believe

that Sally is definitely so good at introducing new people to the old people and you know,

like she definitely does that best. Yeah. Well, I love to do it, but I encourage everyone

to do it, right? Because it really is a community affair, if you will, right? Absolutely. We

are all gifted in introducing and being a part of that for sure. I would say back to

your question about challenges for church Elizabeth in terms of practicing hospitality.

I mean, obviously, you know, there's people that have been part of our church community

for decades, which is a really wonderful thing. But I think it's really easy as humans for

us to get very familiar and sort of forget, forget what it is to be new. And also, it's

really easy for us to make friendships and we're trying to help people connect and build

community, right? So that's a good thing. But it can turn into maybe not so much of

a good thing when it becomes a bit cliquey. And so I think we'll get to some challenges

later on at the end of the podcast about how we can challenge each other to make sure that

we're not a cliquey family, right? That we always are, yes, engaging in those relationships

that we're enjoying and meeting people and, you know, meeting with our friends too, but

also always keeping an eye for those who are new amongst us. So I think that's always a

challenge with any church is the possibility of it becoming a little too groupie or cliquey.

Yeah, thank you guys. Actually, there was a lot of wisdom in what each of you said.

I would love to even summarize that in the comments below in this, because there was

a lot of really good takeaways, I think, from each one of you, even down to just extending

a smile, practicing it outside the church, and then being aware of our comfort zones

or our comfort people and looking outside and just sort of widening the gate, I suppose,

right? Opening up our arms to those people. So Sally, you mentioned that you were listening

to, I guess, maybe it was a podcast or a conference, and in there, there were some challenges extended

to not just people who were in your role, but really to anybody. And I was thinking

that maybe if you could share those challenges, maybe some of us would like to take those

on.

Sure. Yeah. So there's two challenges. The first one is called the three minute challenge,

which is basically try to spend at least three minutes each Sunday, or maybe any gathering

you're at for that matter. It doesn't just have to be church. Talking to someone you

usually wouldn't talk to, right? And I love that. So it's really manageable. It's just

three minutes, right? It's not a whole long, deep conversation, but just having, it would

be amazing if at Trinity we continue this atmosphere of trying to always be talking

to not just our friends, but others as well. So that's the three minute challenge. Three

minutes. Okay. And then there's the 10 foot challenge.

A little bit more daunting, but perhaps not. I know, right? A little bit of a number, but

basically to sort of have a radius of 10 feet around you and to be aware of that radius,

almost like a bubble of 10 feet and to say, okay, who's around me right now? Whether

when I'm sitting in the pew, and we sort of do that practice every Sunday, right? By greeting

each other, those that are around us, but also to extend that then to the lobby, to

coffee hour, you know, who's around me? Am I aware of who's around me? And especially

if there's anyone around me that may not have anyone to talk to at this moment, or may seem

a little bit sad today, or maybe a little bit lost. Maybe it's their first time and

they're not sure what's happening next, right? So just that 10 foot challenge of being aware

of our environment and reaching out then to those within our environment that might need

to reach out. I think those are great. I think one thing too, is you have to be present in

mind when you're talking to people. Don't be talking to people and have a grocery list

or I got to do this or got to do that. When you're talking to somebody, focus on what

they're saying as well. You know, don't be so concerned to what your thoughts are. Think

of what they're thinking. Really open yourself up to the person. Because a lot of people

do that. They'll talk to somebody. But meanwhile, they've got a dialogue going on in their head

and you can see it on their face. You know, and that's, that's an important thing, because

people can pick up on that sort of thing. You know, don't, if you're going to go and

talk to somebody, go and talk to them. Listen to what they're saying. Don't do it just

because you feel like you have to do it. Really be present when you're doing. That's what

I feel. And I think that's what Jesus did, right? So I think, like if we can sort of

anchor this ministry and practice of hospitality in our faith, right? That we're doing it not

because we do it well, but because Jesus and His Spirit, like we talked about today, is

in us. And He's the one that's helping us to do this well. Right. And then, yeah, Jesus

didn't He. He was always about the other person. It sort of wasn't His own agenda. It was,

how are you doing today? How can I help you? And really listening and really meeting that

person where they were at. And then you get people to accept you more when you know they're

here. A lot of times people just want to be seen. Maybe not necessarily you have to say

something to them. Maybe they just want to be seen. I'm a lonely person and I come here

because I don't know anybody or I just want to be seen. And some people just want to be

seen. And sometimes that's all you have to give them. That's what I got when I got here.

That's so nice. They stood back. They let me in nicely. But after coming here for the

first time, I never had an experience like that in church. And when I came out, I was

like, this was like being, you ever been to a family party? Like a close family party?

Sure. That's what it was like when I left here. I was like, these people, they're a

family. You know, it's all level ground here. So I just, yeah, yeah. That's a great church.

What a great note to leave on guys. I think that's, it was a great conversation. It was

a little shorter than usual because we got started a little later, but I feel like we

really made the most of this talk right now, guys. Thank you for joining me. I would love

to have you back because you were wonderful guests. But I'll let you go off to get your

coffee and your cookies now. And a happy Pentecost Sunday. Thank you. Thank you so much.