Malachi 2:10-16

Well just imagine with me it's about 450 BC in the land of Judah and picture a man living there

! And he goes to his local prophet Malachi. I'm so disappointed Malachi. Coming back

! Why doesn't the Lord accept my worship and my offering? Why doesn't the Lord accept my worship?

My offerings Malachi. To be honest I'm feeling pretty dry spiritually. What's the matter Malachi?

Well any great pastor would begin to ask questions wouldn't he? How's your Bible reading? How's

your prayer life going? Good questions to ask. But did you notice the question that Malachi

asks the man how's your marriage? He wants to talk about divine stuff. Malachi wants to

talk domestic stuff. How are things with you and the wife? Malachi in this section rebukes

the Israelite man. He rebukes the religion of the man because of his relationships. Particularly

his marriage or his divorce but it could mean all of his relationships. And God says to us

in this section your relationships with one another deeply and profoundly affect your relationship

with me. That's the logic of verse 13 and 14 if you look there isn't it? I'm just over

the page. The people say why doesn't the Lord accept our offerings? Why is our relationship

with him not working? Verse 14 God says the Lord is witness between you and the wife of your

youth. God is saying here what goes on in your house, in your living room and in your bedroom

deeply affects what is going to happen when you come to my house. Things between me and

you. So the important connection to see in our passage this morning is that the guy's religious

problems were actually relational problems. His spiritual life or her spiritual life was affected

by his social life with others. Now why does that matter so much to God? Why get so worked

up about it Malachi? About human relationships? Well first of all these relationships matter he says

because we have one father creator God. We have one father creator God. As Israel read out the passage

earlier I don't know if you noticed the repeated word in these verses. The key word that is repeated

is the word faithlessly. Do you notice that? Chapter 2 verse 10, verse 11, verse 14, verse 15, verse 16.

Faithlessly. The word is a bit stronger really. It can mean more like treachery. It's a very strong word. It speaks of betrayal.

It's a bit stronger. It's a bit stronger. It's a bit stronger. It's a bit stronger. It's a bit stronger. It's a bit stronger.

It was, verse 11, an abomination. Now that is a very strong word. It's the same word that is used for how God feels about child sacrifice.

It's killing your children for a false god. Or of incest. It's a very strong word. Relational breakdown between them is an abomination to God.

Because it was God who brought them together in the first place, wasn't it? If you look back at verse 10,

Have we not all one Father? Has not one God created us? Then why are we faithless to one another?

Malachi asks a rhetorical question, doesn't he? Stupid question.

There is an inexpressible bond between them that they have forgotten and they are ignoring and they are going against.

It's that bond between siblings, isn't it?

I don't know if you have got a brother or a sister or you've grown up in a family with lots of brothers and sisters.

There is that connection, isn't there? Because of a common parent, usually in most cases.

Connection with mum and dad.

And so if siblings end up falling out, it really affects the parents.

It is really upsetting to see children seriously break up, isn't it?

Not just to fall out for a bit.

But when they are treacherous towards one another.

Because their identity, their unity, their oneness in the family is about the identity of the one parent.

To act like you are no brother or sister of mine is to say that he is no father of us.

Betraying the one who brought them together.

And so this is why an issue between two Christian people is never just an issue between two Christian people.

Social problems in the church and amongst the people of God will often lead to spiritual problems.

It's really interesting how the Bible prioritises those two things.

Because you would have thought, wouldn't you, that spiritual things are more important than kind of relational things.

But remember what Jesus says.

He says, if therefore you're presenting your offering at the altar, religious activity,

and there remember your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar.

And go your way, first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering.

He's saying there, isn't he, that there's something more important than giving an offering.

Something more important than religious activity, or even giving financially, or serving in the church.

It is giving socially.

It is giving socially.

And getting right with other people.

Our church building debt kind of hangs over us, doesn't it?

But it's not the biggest challenge for this church, actually.

It's the challenge of our relationships.

Treachery and betrayal and ignoring that connection is an abomination to God.

Because he is our one father and one creator.

And it reflects on him.

Now, we can apply it generally to relationships in the church.

But I think Malachi here, and we can see that he's on to something more specific.

Because this treachery, in particular, happens in two ways in this passage.

Treachery, first of all, happens when we establish wrong relationships.

It happens when we establish wrong relationships.

And this is to do primarily in this passage here, with the relationship of marriage.

Just drop your eye down to verse 11.

You profane the sanctuary of the Lord.

You've married the daughter of a foreign God.

God says here, doesn't he, that damage is done to my worship and my sanctuary

when you get close to the wrong kinds of people.

When you build relationships with those people, our relationship breaks down.

Because marriage is a very, very powerful thing.

Later in verse 14, he speaks about marriage being like a partnership.

And the same word is used to describe the cement that sticks bricks together in a building.

Once you put them together, it's very difficult to pull them apart.

It is a covenant relationship.

A legally binding relationship.

And that pervasive bond, that legal bond between a man and a woman,

is important particularly because of its spiritual significance to the people of God.

Malachi talks about marrying the daughter of a foreign God here, doesn't he?

Now, some theologians think that that is just picture language.

It's just a parable of their kind of idolatry, of them turning away from God.

It's picture language.

But that is to miss the point.

It wasn't just that marrying foreign daughters was a picture of idolatry.

It was actually the cause of it.

God had said through Moses, hadn't he, in Deuteronomy,

You shall not intermarry with foreign women or men,

giving your sons to their daughters or taking their daughters for your sons.

For they would turn away your sons from following me to serve other gods.

We've got to be careful there.

We see in Deuteronomy that racial intermarriage was forbidden.

For the Old Testament people of God, but not for racial reasons.

But for religious reasons.

It was because then each nation had their own particular god that they would worship.

And so marriages to men or women outside of Israel

was the catalyst for spiritual problems, for idolatry.

So the warning was, if you marry that person who is not of me,

not of the Lord, then that will have an impact on your worship.

And that's because marriage was not just seen as a romantic commitment then.

It was a way of making alliances,

getting security, of making political moves.

Marriage was the way that you got what you wanted and what you needed in life.

You see what they were doing here was

trying to get the things that they thought actually God was no longer going to give them

by compromising on this.

Emma's been watching Pride and Prejudice,

the BBC version, of course.

It's all about pairing the Bennett sisters up with the right men, isn't it?

That is such a crude way of describing it.

But that's as far as I can see what it's about.

The right men should bring security

and peace

and prosperity,

Mr. Darcy.

They are the things that God had already promised to his people.

They think,

God isn't giving me these things,

so I'll go elsewhere.

I'll go outside of Israel.

I'll look for a better suitor.

I'll marry into another family,

into another nation

with another God.

So what they were doing

maritally was an indication of how they were

spiritually.

Malachi is showing us here, isn't he,

that marriage

is a very religious activity.

Whether you're religious or not,

who you decide to make partnership with

will shape the God that you worship

and how you worship.

It's one of the big problems

in the land of Israel

with the kings, wasn't it?

Even the good kings

that managed to get rid of the

false gods out of the land of Egypt

couldn't quite get rid of the

high places

where the false gods were worshipped.

Who brought those high places in?

Well, mostly Solomon,

the king's foreign wives.

He couldn't quite bring himself

to put them away.

And the signs are perhaps there

if you look at verse 13.

You see the way that they worship.

God rebukes them for

this crying and weeping and groaning.

It's kind of hypocritical

show of religion.

But what is damning about that

is it looks a lot like

pagan religion,

pagan worship.

I don't know if you remember

in two kings

the whole Elijah

and the prophets of Baal

you know when God

sends his fire down

and burns up

the offering

when it's covered in water.

And the way that the prophets of Baal

try and do that

is by crying out

and calling out

and going into hysterics

but he did not answer.

And they were marrying

these women

and in turn

marrying the spirit

of the age of the world

around them

and adopting their values

and adopting

their way of worshipping

their way of reaching salvation

and it's so subtle actually

isn't it?

Notice that they're still

trying to worship

the Lord

at his temple

but the way

they are doing that

has shifted.

They come with

outward sorrow

showing great

external demonstrations

but that is not

how the Lord

has asked them

to worship him.

Not with emotional

blackmail

not by bending

his arm

that was

pagan

worship

to kind of

speed the response

of the gods.

The way

they worship

has subtly

been changed

by the world

around them

and by the connections

they've made

with it.

they've forgotten

grace

which the world

knows so little

about.

They'd adopted

the we need to

impress God

mentality of worship

and it was so subtle

wasn't it?

We realise here

that marriage

is a religious

act

and who you

marry

bears on

who you

worship

and how you

worship

and how you

begin to

think

and how you

believe.

Don't

underestimate

the influence

that these

connections

can make

that a spouse

can have

on you.

Let me say

that if you're

considering marriage

here this morning

at some point

and you are

on a trajectory

of falling

in love

with somebody

who is not

a Christian

you are on

a trajectory

of disobeying

God

and of having

your worship

of him

hampered

and of

being changed

or of even

leaving him

altogether.

Somebody once

said

don't marry

the spirit

of the age

or you'll be

a widower

in the next.

If that

person's

supreme

God

is something

other than

the Lord

then you'll

be heading

into a union

that betrays

him

that is

treacherous

towards him.

Think about

your brothers

and sisters

as well.

It is

treacherous

when a

Christian person

says I'm

living for

the Lord

and then

unite with

someone who

does not

support or

live in that

covenant that

you have with

the Lord.

It betrays

the church

of God

doesn't it?

It deals

treacherously

with your

brothers and

sisters saying

one thing and

doing another

saying I'm

committed to

you.

We are one

body and

one family

united in

mind and

spirit yet I'm

going to marry

this person and

I'm going to

go out with

them.

It's treacherous

isn't it?

I know that

Malachi is being

pretty tough

here.

maybe some

of you at

the end of

this service

are going to

think well

this area of

relationships has

been an area

that I've

really messed

up in and

it's a real

difficulty for

me and there

are lots of

regrets in my

life and I

feel awful

about them

and I long

for grace and

I long for

forgiveness.

Let me say

to you that

actually you

are not if

you feel like

that in the

crosshairs this

morning.

Actually it's

the people who

sit rather

comfortably looking

at this behaviour

and thinking I'm

so glad I'm not

like that.

Because as well

as making wrong

relationships the

big problem and

actually I think

the bigger problem

for them is

betraying and

letting right

relationships fester

and neglecting

them and even

breaking them.

Second reason

why treachery

happens making

wrong relationships

but secondly

when we break

right relationships

when we break

right relationships

look at verse

14 again

you say why

does he not

because the

Lord was

witness between

you and the

wife of your

youth to whom

you have been

faithless.

though she is

your companion

and your wife

by covenant.

And he speaks

of the same

issue doesn't

he in verse

16 for the

man who does

not love his

wife but

divorces her

says the

Lord the God

of Israel

covers his

garment with

violence and

so guard

yourselves in

your spirit

do not be

faithless.

I think most

of us in this

room have

probably been

touched in

some way

by marriage

breakdown.

The ripples

of it go

far and

they last

a long

time don't

they?

The Bible

teaches that

in some

cases divorce

may be the

best thing.

There are

legitimate cases

for that.

It's a really

sticky issue

isn't it?

I want to

say that this

passage is

not all

that the

Bible teaches

on the

subject of

marriage or

on divorce.

We've got to

judge each

case by

reasoned

application of

the whole

counsel of

God.

And there

are always

there's always

restoration

and forgiveness

when we

mess up and

we do mess

up.

But having

said that I

don't want to

soften what

Malachi brings

to the table

because the

reasons for

divorce for

them in

this case

were just

plain wrong.

The problem

here for

these Israelite

men is what

ruled the

marriage was

purely the

whims of

these men.

what had

happened was

that the

covenantal

relationship,

that legally

binding

relationship,

had become

a consumer

relationship.

And when

you're a

consumer,

the customer

is always

right.

Right?

Our society

says that

love is a

spontaneous

desire,

not a

legal oath

or promise.

So when

the flame

flickers out,

move on.

And in

the same

way for

them,

covenants

don't mean

much now.

An

obligation

to love

someone means

less than

an impulse

to love

someone.

And they

were divorcing

their wives

as far as

we can see

for no good

reason at

all.

Good

women of

the Lord,

wives of

their youth,

verse 14.

Maybe their

first love,

first wives.

And again

here, the

social issues

lead to

spiritual

issues.

Look at

verse 15.

Did he

not make

them one

with a

portion of

the spirit

in their

union?

And what

was the

one God

seeking?

Godly

offspring.

Now these

verses are

not easy

to understand.

Verse 15

is not easy

to understand,

not even

if you can

get the

English

right of

the original

Hebrew.

It's one

of the rare

places where

it's quite

difficult to

know the

precise sense

of the

Hebrew.

But I

think we

can work

out from

the context

what he's

trying to

say here.

He's saying

here that

divorce of

this kind

is an

attack on

the identity

of God

as one,

as the

only God,

mainly

because of

the function

of marriage

in producing

and raising

children.

part of

the one

God's

plan to

fill the

world with

glory is

uniting a

husband and

a wife to

be one,

to fill the

world with

the seed of

his people.

Do you see

that?

Godly

offspring.

That was the

plan for Adam

and Eve,

wasn't it?

And it

means that

even in

Malachi's

day,

God uses

natural means

of families

and of

having

babies

and to

be a

part,

to be a

means of

the increase

of his

kingdom.

To bring

people into

the world

who keep

covenant with

him,

godly

offspring.

It doesn't

mean that a

child born to

Christian parents

is guaranteed

to keep

covenant with

the Lord,

it doesn't

mean that,

but that's

the expectation.

And so

breaking right

relationships

in marriage

and making

wrong ones

is a barrier

to this.

It is a

barrier to

the child.

It's a

really serious

problem.

When parents

are no longer

able to

raise a

child in

the Lord's

way because

there's a

conflict of

interest,

the man

has thrown

his Christian

wife out

and married

a non-Christian

and however

sympathetic she

might be

to his

religion,

it will

be a

barrier to

the child's

godliness.

And it

might even

contribute to

future covenant

breaking by

the child.

This kind

of consumer

way of

looking at

relationships

puts a

stop to

God's

kingdom.

It would

be as bad

as standing

at the

door at

5 to

11 on a

Sunday morning

and just

pushing people

out of

the door.

children may

walk away

from the

faith of

their parents

for different

reasons,

but it

doesn't mean

that this

reason still

is not

true,

of breaking

down good

relationships

and letting

them fester

and neglecting

them.

Someone in

the Times

newspaper has

written recently

that if you

allow yourself

to believe

that marriage

is the union

of two

persons for

life,

in my

opinion we

need to

begin the

long process

of reconditioning

ourselves to

let go of

the culturally

imposed obsession

with monogamy.

That's staying

with one

spouse.

In other

words,

they're saying

aren't they,

marriage is a

consumer

relationship,

not a

covenantal

relationship.

relationship.

The whole

why bother

with a piece

of paper

thing,

you hear

that a lot

don't you,

if we're

together as

a couple,

why bother

signing a

piece of

paper?

Why make

it legal?

Actually some

people say

if we make

it legal it

will make

it worse.

Bertrand

Russell the

atheist said

relationships

are killed

by the

thought that

they are

a duty.

But don't

we know

actually deep

down

that true

love expresses

itself in

those kind

of promises.

When you

want to say

to a person

not just

I love

you but to

quote Whitney

Houston,

I will

always love

you.

There will

never be a

day when I

will not

love you

even if my

feelings change

from time

to time.

It's not

love if it

doesn't say

that, is

it?

I love

you enough

but actually

not enough

to cut

off all

of my

other

options.

Not

enough to

say I

never want

the

relationship

to end.

Lewis

Meade,

who's a

Christian

ethicist,

says,

my wife

has lived

with five

different men

since we

got married.

Each of

them has

been me.

And that

is the

challenge,

isn't it,

of these

relationships,

these good

relationships.

And it's

the warning

here of

maintaining

them, to

guard yourself

in your

spirit and

not to be

faithless,

as Malachi

says.

Husbands

are commanded,

love your

wives.

Don't

kind of

soften that.

It doesn't

say, do it

when you

feel love.

love.

It is a

command for

all of the

time.

Wives are

commanded as

well to

love their

husbands.

Malachi

says, don't

hate your

wife.

Don't

divorce her.

That goes

for the

wife too.

Marry

someone you

like, yes,

of course.

But it's

realising that

on some

days you

won't like

them, and

it might get

a little bit

rocky.

But when

it's a

covenantal

relationship built

on legal

promises and

not on

consumer

choice,

actually,

you've

got to

love them.

You've

got to

love them.

C.S.

Lewis was

on the

radio a

lot during

World War

II, and

he spoke,

one of his

main messages

was about

loving your

enemies, which

was a really

big question,

wasn't it,

during World

War II for

many people.

He asked

the question,

how do you

manufacture

feelings that

aren't there

for someone

you know

you need

to love?

How do

you love

someone you

don't love?

He shows

that actions

often control

feelings, not

the other way

around.

He said,

don't bother

wasting time

wondering whether

you love your

neighbour, act

as if you

did.

When you

behave as if

you love

someone, you

will presently

come to love

him.

He says

it works

the other

way round

as well,

with hate,

bearing in

mind the

history of

when this

was.

He said,

the Germans

perhaps at

first ill-treated

the Jews

because they

hated them,

but afterwards

they hated

them much

more because

they had

ill-treated

them.

The more

cruel you

are, he

said, the

more you

will hate,

and the

more you

hate, the

more cruel

you will

become.

So true,

isn't it?

Actions lead

to feelings.

Feelings don't

lead to action

all the time.

Love is both

a spontaneous

thing, and

it's actually a

duty of

care.

So you

may not

feel tender

to those

people that

you are

joined to

in the

church and

in marriage.

You may

not feel

loving towards

them, you

may not feel

eager to

please them,

you may

not feel

affectionate,

but you

must be

those things.

Because

marriage is

covenantal,

not consumer

relationship.

We

understand this,

don't we,

with children,

if you've

got children.

We would

frown more

on a parent

who gives

their child

up because

they don't

like them

anymore,

than on a

husband or

wife who

does that.

even when

a child

gives nothing

in return,

even when

we don't

like them

on occasion,

when they

really wind

us up,

when all

the effort

is poured

in for

no return,

you still

love them

actually because

you've got to

love them.

Later in

life they may

go off the

rails,

they may

require even

more investment

in their

twenties,

giving you

nothing in

return,

but you

still love

them because

you've got to

love them.

you have a

duty of

care,

you have a

responsibility.

We understand

that with

children and

it's the

same with

these

covenantal

relationships.

So what

God has

joined together,

let not

man separate.

The man

leaves

Malachi's

office.

He's got

some thinking

to do,

hasn't he?

With the

huge realisation

that it is

impossible to

leave your

private life

at home

when you

come to

God's

house.

His

religious

problems

were his

relational

problems

and his

spiritual

life was

affected by

his social

life.

Wives

and husbands

in the

Lord,

if you're

not married,

your brothers

and your

sisters,

you are

joined

together with

them in

a covenantal

relationship

under one

father and

creator who

has brought

you together

by covenant.

And so

folks,

you've got to

love them.

You've got to

love them.

And as you

do that in

action,

you will find

that you will

begin to do it

in feeling.

Let's pray.

Let's pray.