Spread Kindness Like Confetti

Yes, we are starting uh we started last week our series

They'll get it here.

On one anothering, we are going to be looking at several of the Bible texts that talk about the phrase or use the phrase

one another and one of those texts is what we read this morning for our scripture reading.

Last week uh Cheryl and I

Did some shopping and we went to the mall and I saw a banner that said this.

And I said, you know that sounds a whole lot better than what my sermon title was.

Because I have boring sermon titles.

Just boring.

And I they they're not gonna bring anybody off the street to hear the message.

That's for sure.

So I need somebody with some creativity to come up with awesome sermon titles.

But when I saw that, I said, yeah, that's an awesome sermon title.

Spread kindness like confetti.

Can you imagine if you and I were sitting together and we were just having a simple conversation and I politely asked you, do you consider yourself a kind person?

How would you respond?

Don't answer it.

Just think about it for just a second.

You thought about it?

Research tells us that most individuals say yes.

I'm a kind person.

But then when the researchers are asked a few more questions, they say, Oh, did you remember yesterday when your children were

Gathering around you when you got home late and they were a little bit hungry, and you said, Yes, you'll get dinner when dinner's ready.

Or maybe it was the yesterday, the passive aggressive comment that you made to your spouse.

Or maybe it was yesterday morning when you were late to work and you didn't let someone merge into traffic.

Now that I've reminded you, do you consider yourself a kind person?

Most of us still say yes.

But those were exceptions to the rule yesterday.

Normally I am a kind person.

Oftentimes we tell ourselves, yeah, we are are we are kind people.

We do some kind things.

But the research tells us that we don't do as many kind things as we think we do.

And so that's one of the reasons why this this message on on kindness comes from scripture.

One of the reasons I started with it first or second is because kindness kind of covers several other things.

In the series.

But kindness is kind of a foundation block.

Many of us as Christians, we say, Well, I'm a kind person, but I'm just going to ask you, uh, have you ever met a

A mean vegan.

Some of us are you're shaking your head, yes, you've met a mean vegan.

And you say, hey, here's uh some ice cream.

Maybe it'll make you feel better.

And uh the it'll help you get it out of you or something.

Uh

Or I'll m ask, don't take too much offense at this.

I'm going to ask you, how many of you have met a mean Sabbath keeper?

Because you know the purpose of Sabbath is for us to have that relationship with God so that we are sanctified.

It's the way God the product of the process God uses in the sanctifying process.

And so Sabbath is a really have you met mean Sabbath keeper?

I go one step further.

How many of you have met a mean keeper

Christian.

I hear some of you.

Oh yeah.

Yeah, that uh and it Yeah, I shouldn't have to explain that.

that one.

If we're a follower of Jesus Christ, to say a mean Christian, that's kind of uh yeah, oxymoron, isn't it?

Our scripture reading, Ephesians 4, 32.

Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ

Forgave you.

If you think about the the kindest person that you know.

I mean, all of us kind of have a a picture of the kindest person that you know or that you have met.

I mean, mine starts off with my grandmother.

And then it moves to my mother.

And I probably should have started with my wife.

But those are the people that when when I think of a a kind person, I mean those are the people that I that I think of, and I think those three ladies are kind of cut out of the same cloth.

Because

They let their grandchildren win at board games.

I mean, I could never understand, still don't understand that.

I mean I I you know when I was playing checkers with my father, when I if I beat him, I knew I had accomplished something.

But I'm afraid my daughters, they don't know what it means to win when they're playing mom.

They don't know if mom just wasn't

Wasn't paying attention or something and they got by or it's because of the kindness.

My grandmother was the same way, my mom was the same way

Kindness, those those that focus their attention on the other person.

The good news for me.

The good news for you is that we can grow our kindness quotient.

Did you know that's possible?

It's possible for us to grow our kindness quotient, but it takes some intentionality.

It doesn't happen naturally.

I mean, when was the last time you were talking with someone and you were not really present?

You know, your ears were there, your lips were there, but you weren't there.

You know how that works?

Too often

That doesn't happen to you?

Because it happens to me, and oftentimes I'm

I'm preaching to myself today, okay?

Oftentimes I'm the unkind one because I'm not fully present.

I'm not I'm not paying full attention to

What is taking place in front of me?

There's a communication model that we need to be aware of called, see if I can get his name right.

I don't get his name right all the time.

Moravians rule.

Some of you know about Albert Moravian.

He did a research and came up with a communication formula that says our communication, that 55% of our communication is.

Our body language.

Thirty-eight percent of our communication comes from our tone.

Seven percent comes from our words.

Think about that.

Think about that in our day and age when most of our communication is texting each other.

I tell people, I say, when people send me a text, when they send me an email, I don't know how to read it.

I mean, I tend to read between the lines.

Of the last conversation or previous conversations that I've had with that person.

And if previous conversations I've had with that person are good when I read between the lines, I think.

Oh, they're saying something positive.

It's encouragement.

This is uh it but if they say something that can be taken two ways.

I don't always know how to take it.

And then the second thing is that we say words

And what do they see?

They hear the words, they get your tone of voice.

But they don't get your body language.

How much of the communication is missing without the body language?

More than half.

Now I'm telling you this now, but I want you to apply it at the end.

Okay?

This communication is important.

The way we we we talk with people, the the way we meet people.

people, the way we greet people, the way we are are present with people.

Now I'm gonna give you permission, or maybe I should turn over here, those of you that see me every day.

Give you permission to call me on this because I have a problem with this thing.

I have a problem with picking it up when I'm talking with people.

But I need to grow my kindness quotient.

Because Scripture tells me to be kind

When it talks about being kind, is this one of the Ten Commandments?

Do we rate it up there high?

Or is this just one of the things that we think Paul was just writing and when he says, be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgives?

Is it just something to fill up the page?

Be kind with one another.

The second word there was to be kind and tender-hearted.

Do you know what tender-hearted means?

It's one of those Jewish idioms or Hebrew idioms that literally means much bowels.

You you like that?

You you you've seen people, you you know you you see people you especially children when they see that bird that has crashed into the window of the house

How do they how do they respond?

I mean, they go like they themselves are hurt.

Dad, do something.

It's just lay out there.

Why do they they feel that way?

It's because they they they have sympathy.

They empathize for that bird that has just hit that that window.

And so it's called tender-heartedness.

Now that that person easily moves to to love, to sorrow, to

Sympathy, be kind and tender-hearted to one another.

We are to be encouraging one another to

Be tender-hearted, to sympathize with one another.

Peter said in 1 Peter chapter 3, verse 8, he says, Finally, all of you, be of one mind, having compassion.

1 Peter 3:8

for one another.

Love as brothers.

Be tenderhearted.

Be courteous.

Both Paul and Peter tell.

Tell us that we need to be tender-hearted towards one another, kind towards one another, compassionate towards one another.

This kind of living is important.

When I think through scripture, when I think about the person that is encouraging, when I think about the person that is sympathetic, when I think

I think about the person who is tenderhearted.

The story that came to my mind was a Good Samaritan.

He was tenderhearted.

He showed kindness.

The ones that walked before the Samaritan, they saw the person that was laying there on the ground, they saw him that was wounded, they saw what had happened to him, they may have even looked at him, but they

Didn't touch.

They didn't go over and feel his pulse.

They didn't see if there was still life.

They had other places to be.

They had other things to do.

They didn't want to be unclean.

And so they continued on.

But the Samaritan.

The Samaritan.

If things had been reversed in this story

The Jew probably would have just kept walking on had he seen a Samaritan lay there.

The one that was chosen of Israel would have probably just continued on the path.

But the Samaritan was

was tenderhearted.

There was something inside of him, something that that caused him to be to be moved, to be motivated to do something on behalf of the stranger that was lying there

What about us?

Do we show kindness?

Do we show this kind of tender-heartedness?

I'm sharing this with you to remind myself that our kindness quotient can grow.

It can be increased.

We can make things a habit.

When it comes to kindness, when we do these acts of kindness, there's something that happens in our brain.

Oxytocin is released into our body.

And this is a good thing.

It is good for us.

If you are, just look at the things here, okay?

I'll go to the next slide here.

If you have stress in your life, oxytocin helps to prevent stress.

It also lowers your blood pressure.

It also has kindness

This oxytocin also helps to protect your heart.

It improves your body's disease fighting system, your immune system.

It improves your energy.

It reduces aches and pains.

And it also can lead to a longer.

life and help you to feel better about yourself.

Should I read that again?

Do we need that kind of oxytocin in our life?

Think about that again, okay?

Prevents stress, lowers blood pressure, protects your heart, improves your body's disease fighting system, your immune system, it improves your energy, reduces a I didn't put that

aches and pains went up there did I?

Ah I needed that one.

And it can lead to a longer life.

And in the process you can feel better about yourself.

This is what kindness does to us.

That means it is for your health, for you to have better health.

You should be more kind.

Would you like to reduce your aches and pains

Be kind.

If you like to reduce your stress level, be kinder.

Would you like your blood pressure to go down?

The doctor doesn't write this on their prescription pad, does he?

Be kinder.

Ephesians 4, verse 32.

Ephesians 4:32

Be kind to one another.

You got it memorized yet?

Shall we read it together then?

Okay, all together now.

Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

Forgiving one another.

Oh man, that one's

Hard.

Do we realize that the act of forgiveness is also an act of kindness

But that act of forgiveness that I call an act of kindness, that's an act of kindness that you give to yourself.

Because when we are not forgiving, when we don't forgive other people, that's like holding a grudge.

That's like that's like taking a a spoonful of poison and hoping somebody else dies.

You heard that, right?

When we hang on the right, you can't get it.

And we are unforgiving, that's like taking a spoonful of poison and hoping somebody else dies.

The likelihood of them dying if I take poison is what?

Zero.

But yet that's what happens when we hang on to our unforgiveness.

When we do not forgive that other person

We keep hoping something happens to them, but instead it happens to us.

Jesus talked about forgiveness when he taught the Lord's Prayer.

Just remind you, this is part of the Sermon on the Mount.

And we are studying in Thoughts of the Mount of Blessings in our midweek service if you want to come on Wednesday evening.

We're on chapter 3, about halfway through chapter 3, if you want to join us.

Jesus said, Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us.

Forgive us our sins how?

As we forgive those that sin against us

Against us.

That's heavy.

How do we want God to forgive us

We want him to say, be forgiven.

Go in peace.

Is that what we want him to say?

Your sins have been washed away.

Go in peace.

I mean, that's what we would like to hear from him, isn't it?

Your sins have been cast into the depths of the sea.

Have no fear

But yet what would do we do to others?

Oh, that's a whole nother sermon, another Bible text here.

Let's see, Matthew 18, 21.

And Peter came to him and said, Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him?

Up to seven times?

Now that was a pretty good answer because at the time Jewish thought was three times.

So Peter had taken it and doubled it and added one.

So he was really going above and beyond when he said seven times.

But Jesus said to him, I do not say to you up to seven times, but seventy times seven times.

Have you heard that 70 times 7 before?

I mean, you're good Adventists, Bible scholars, prophecy scholars.

You know where that 77 comes from?

Yeah, those years, 490 years that were cut off from the 2300 years that was given to the Jews.

490 years

Worth of forgiveness.

Time that was allotted to them.

Now you think about poor Peter here.

Peter hears those words 70 times seven and he thinks 490.

I've heard that before.

490 years worth of forgiveness?

I don't even have 490 years in my life.

Can't even get up to 490 times.

I know some of you are still keeping track of how many times you've forgiven.

people and you're getting there.

Keep it up.

Make it to $4.

90.

By then it will be such a habit you'll carry on.

Mark 11, 25 and 26.

And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you

Your trespasses.

But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.

That's kind of strong.

It's kind of heavy.

It r it reminds us how important forgiveness is.

Forgiveness is not just a a a small thing.

Forgiveness is is huge.

Next I have Colossians three, twelve and thirteen.

Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved.

Who's he writing to?

Yeah, to the Church of Colossae, but we're going to apply it to us.

So he starts off there, therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved.

Put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, long-suffering, bearing with one another, and forgiving one another.

If anyone has a

Complaint against another, even as Christ forgave you, so you must also do.

Is this forgiveness thing important?

As the elect of God, we should be forgiving one another.

I mean, forgiveness should come just

Flowing out of us just so easily because we know that if we drink the poison, they're not going to die.

So we might as well forgive them so that we can be healed.

We might as well forgive them so that our relationship can be restored.

We might as well forgive them so that our relationship can be restored.

I don't want God to hold anything against me.

I don't want to commit the unpardonable sin.

No, God, I'm not going to forgive them.

I mean, that's not yielding to the Holy Spirit.

When the Holy Spirit says to you, you need to forgive that person, what are we supposed to do?

Yes, Lord.

How do I do that?

Teach me how to forgive because I don't have it in my heart.

I'm not there yet, Lord.

Please give me the willingness to forgive.

I don't want to drink this poison.

Because I don't want to die.

And the reality is, I really don't want them to die.

So please, Lord, take this poison away from me.

Give me the willingness, the heart to forgive.

Because I know that I need forgiveness.

Forgiveness from you.

I'm going to come back and I'm going to say it again.

This forgiveness is in this kindness category.

It is an act of showing kindness to to to forgive someone.

Our scripture reading, Ephesians 4.

32.

Yeah, you thought you'd read it all together before.

I want you to have this memorized by the time we get done.

Okay?

Are you ready with this?

All right.

And to be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

Did God forgive you?

You didn't have to think very long about that, did you

I mean, we look at the cross.

I mean, the cross is up here to remind us that Jesus died on the cross because

He loved us.

And while he was there, he prayed, Father, forgive them.

Do you know who them are?

That's me.

I'm part of them.

You.

That's you.

You're part of them.

Father, forgive them for they don't know what they do.

They don't have a clue what they're doing.

Father, please forgive them

I mean the heart of Jesus is a forgiving Jesus.

He has a yearning, a longing to forgive each and every one of us.

But when we rebel in our heart, and we don't offer forgiveness to our brother and sister that's across the aisle,

Or in the church next door.

Or the neighbor next door.

Or the co-worker that's in the cubicle beside us

Dr.

Frank Mayfield was touring the Tewksbury Institute when he was headed out of the Institute.

He accidentally ran into a

An elderly floor maid.

To cover the awkward moment, he asked the floor maid, How long have you worked here?

I've worked here almost since the place

Open, the maid replied.

What can you tell me about the history of this place?

He asked.

I don't think I can tell you anything about the history.

But I can show you something.

Come with me.

And with that, the maid led him downstairs into the basement under the oldest section of the building.

And there, down in the basement, there was a cell that looked like a prison bar's.

The bars were rusted with age, and she said, That's the cage where they kept

Annie Sullivan.

The doctor asked, Who's Annie?

Annie was a young girl who was brought in here because she was incorrigible.

Nobody could do anything with her.

She would bite and scream and throw food at people.

The doctors and nurses could not even get close to her to examine her without being clawed or bitten.

spit at or scratched.

I was only a few years younger than Annie myself, and I used to think for sure that I would be I would hate being locked up in that cage.

I wanted to help Annie, but I didn't know how to.

If the doctors and nurses could not help Annie, what could I do?

I didn't know what to do, but I had an idea.

So I baked some brownies.

And I took brownies one day to work.

And I took them and I laid the container next to the prison to the bars there and I set them down and I said, Annie, these are for you.

you if you want them.

And I stepped back, hoping that she would not throw them at me.

She ate them and I left as quickly as I could.

The next day she seemed a little bit happy to see me.

We talked some.

I brought her some other delicacies, and our relationship seemed to grow.

One of the nurses noticed this and told the doctor, and then the doctor asked me if I could help them with any.

If I could help them to examine Annie.

And so I went into the cage first.

I calmed Annie down.

And I held her hand as the doctors came in.

And it was then that they discovered that Annie was almost blind.

They had been working with her for about a year, and it was extremely difficult.

It was only a few months later when the Perkins Institute opened up, the Institute for the Blind, and they sent Annie to Perkins Institute.

A few years later, Annie came back to the Tuxbury Institute to visit to see what she could do to help around the place.

At first, the director did not know what to do with Annie.

But then he had an idea.

He had just received a letter from a gentleman

The gentleman wrote that he had an unruly daughter that was almost like an animal.

She was blind and deaf as well as deranged.

He was at his wit's end and didn't want to put her in an asylum.

So he wrote the Institute and asked if they knew of anyone who could come to his house and work with his daughter.

And that is how Annie Sullivan became the lifelong companion of Helen Keller.

Helen Keller was asked who had the greatest impact on her life, and her answer was

Annie Sullivan.

And Annie said to Helen, No.

The woman who had the greatest impact on your life

Was the floor maid at Tuxbury Institute?

What will a little bit of kindness do?

All together now

And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

What can a little bit of kindness do?

Ten years ago, I was doing some reading.

On the importance of marriage counseling.

I was doing some reading for marriage counseling, and one of the authors that I was reading said: one of the best things to encourage

couples to do is to be kind to one another.

And I said, duh

I mean that should be obvious, shouldn't it?

But the reality is, once couples come for marriage counseling, things

have broken down to the place where kindness is not the first thing on the agenda

The marriage counselor that I was reading said she came to the fact that a kindness was so important that she stopped s her research on marriage and marriage counseling.

And she moved to some research on kindness and being kind and seeing what it will do in people's

Lives.

And because of this emphasis on kindness, she came up with what she referred to as the 30-day kindness challenge.

Trying to encourage people to raise their kindness quotient.

I have good news for you.

I was part of her 30-day kindness challenge.

And because of that, you are going to be part of her 30-day kindness challenge.

If I have your email address.

If I don't, I'm sorry you're on your own.

Or you can give me your email and I can get you on

The list.

But starting tomorrow, you'll get an email that starts us off on a 30-day process for raising our kindness quotient.

And it encourages you how to it may be your spouse, you name me may need to be kinder to, it may be a co-worker, it may be your neighbor, it may be somebody that you you work with, whoever it is.

you can think about who you want to grow your kindness quotient on and practice, well maybe you got three, four, five

six are you counting them how many people you you don't have to choose all of them but just you can practice for the next

30 days some very practical ideas on being kind.

I started today.

As I was sharing with Alice about this, and

the sermon title, she said, Are you going to drop confetti from the ceiling?

Oh man, I wanted to.

But I decided I was going to shoot off a confetti cannon.

And then I had the thought, and who's gonna clean that up?

And I said, you know, I'm going to be kind to the person who would have to clean that up.

And I'm not going to shoot off the confetti cannon in church.

So I'm not going to scare you with a confetti cannon.

I'm not going to drop confetti from the sky.

But I want to release you into the world as a confetti cannon.

Share God's kindness with those around us.

Raise your kindness quotient

Our closing song today is going to be the family of God.

And uh it's a song that most of you know, but as part of our one-anothering, I would like us to stand and to join hands to

together and to make a big circle around we may have to cut down one aisle here and to just make it around the s two center sections

or something, but to join the hands together and to sing this song, I'm so glad I'm part of the family of God.