Living Like a Church Family (Part 2)

outside of your biological family,

where have you sensed the most family-like bond?

Just the sense of oneness or closeness.

Think about it for a moment.

As I think about it,

and I'm going to believe girls and guys both in here,

you experienced it to a great extent

on some type of sports team.

There are people who are on a team

all the way from little league to high school,

even college.

They don't get to play that much,

but they love the sense of camaraderie.

It's like a family.

Their fellow players or their brothers or their sisters.

Coaches are like fathers to them.

Some of you experienced that in a band.

Some of you at Pickens High School.

Some at maybe a college.

Some of you are fortunate in that the place that you work,

there's maybe your office,

or some department,

or some work group.

And there's just a real closeness,

a family-like bond.

Now, don't answer out loud,

but do you sense that at church?

Have you ever?

Do you here?

Do you in a Sunday school class,

or some other small group that meets on a regular basis,

and you really get to know one another

and share life together as brothers and sisters in Christ?

You know, one of the most well-known ways

the New Testament describes the church

is that we're the family of God.

I mean, God is our Father.

Jesus taught us to pray,

think of God as our Heavenly Father,

we who are Christians.

And throughout the New Testament,

Christians, members of the church,

are referred to as brothers and sisters

over and over again.

And so as we think about church,

we need to understand that from God's perspective,

what the Lord intends,

we're supposed to be like a family.

We love one another.

In spite of our differences,

and sometimes disagreements,

we love one another,

and we work together

in doing what God's called us to do

as Pickens First Baptist Church.

Now, I thank God that we don't have a problem

with bad blood or division

between individuals or groups in this church.

You know, if you were just here for the first time,

you haven't been here many times,

you might think the way he's starting,

and when we look at this particular passage of Scripture,

you might think to yourself,

there's a problem.

He is really dealing with some division in the church.

I'm not aware of anything like that.

We are dealing with this subject matter

because that's where we are in the book of Philippians,

and we're going through the book of Philippians.

So that's one of the good things

about going through a book of the Bible.

You cover all kinds of topics,

things that the Lord knows we need.

So I'm not thinking about,

I don't know about

any kind of rupture in our church family.

Here's the way I'm approaching this,

last week and this week.

Do you feel like you are a part of a

close-knit spiritual family

here in this church?

Now it's hard for that to take place

together here like this,

but in smaller groups is where you really experience it,

where you really feel it.

You know, many churches have difficulty

being a close-knit family.

There's a lot of reasons,

but one, we American Christians,

this is not my, I didn't come up with this idea.

I've read this numerous times, and it's true,

but we as American Christians,

we mainly emphasize the idea of our spiritual lives

having a close personal relationship with Jesus Christ,

with God as our Heavenly Father.

And while we like fellowship with other Christians,

it's sort of the icing on the cake.

It's not a part of the real foundation

of what the church is supposed to be

in the way that we normally think.

If we're right with God, that's the main thing.

And it is the main thing,

but it's not the only thing.

Another thing that makes it hard for a church

to really bond together,

some churches, some areas,

is a lot of us,

we have close, immediate,

or extended family members right here close by,

and we don't really have a need

for a lot of other close relationships.

And you think maybe how busy your life is

with work and other things you've got going on,

your immediate or extended family members,

they're not only meeting your needs,

but they're, you think to yourself,

they're the only ones I have time for.

And so when you think about all this together,

it's not an easy thing for a church family

to really,

it's not easy for us to come together

and really think of one another,

relate to one another

like a real family,

as the New Testament calls us to do.

Now, God calls us

to be serious about this,

to truly love one another like family,

and work together in harmony,

doing things to help us

to accomplish our purpose ministry-wise.

God wants us to do that

as a way of expressing our love to Him,

as a way of obeying Him.

We can think about,

we need to be the kind of spiritual family

that the Bible,

we're going to be reading about,

and it pleases our Heavenly Father.

Let me give you a thought here.

Every parent in this room,

it doesn't matter if their children

are 6, 8, 10,

or if they're 50, 60 years old,

every parent in this room

would say that one of the greatest joys

in my life

is for my children,

to see my children love one another.

Get alone.

Have good relationships.

Now, kids in this room,

people in this room who are children,

teenagers, never been married,

you may not can understand that,

but there is nothing

that pleases your parents more

than to see you get alone,

love one another,

just enjoy being together.

And on the other hand,

one of the most disappointing,

hurtful things in all of life

for a parent

is when their children

despise one another,

always at each other's throats,

or they don't have anything

to do with one another.

It's not enough for parents

to have children

that don't just fight,

but ignore one another.

That's the way it is in the church.

God is not pleased

just when we don't fight.

He wants us to really be a family

and live and enjoy life together

as we can

as a church family.

I want you to turn with me

back to Philippians chapter 2.

Philippians 2 · chapter mention

We're going to continue looking at

verses 1 through 4,

verses 3 and 4 in particular today,

what we started last week

about developing greater closeness

in this church,

developing real family-like relationships

with one another in this church.

Philippians 2, verse 1.

Philippians 2:1

So, if there is any encouragement in Christ,

any comfort from love,

any participation in the Spirit,

any affection and sympathy,

complete my joy by being of the same mind,

having the same love,

being in full accord and of one mind.

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit,

but in humility count others

more significant than yourselves.

Let each of you

look not only to his own interests,

but also to the interests of others.

This is Paul's way of calling

this church he's writing to.

He knows them well.

He has a great relationship with them.

And overall,

it's probably the best church

that we have a letter

from Paul to that church

in the New Testament.

But everything's not perfect.

There are some issues there

that he is trying to address.

And trying to help them understand

how to grow deeper together

as true brothers and sisters in the Lord.

Let's look at what that requires.

Now, like we did last week,

as we go through this passage,

you apply this to your home life

wherever you can.

Every point,

everything we look at

is not going to apply

to your family.

But a lot of it can.

A lot of it will

if you'll think through it that way.

And it may be that

what you really need

to get out of this message

is not so much

being closer to people in this church,

although that may be a need,

but it may be that God's got you here

this morning to help you

see the need for you

to start working on

being a better parent

parent or child

or brother or sister

in your home.

Let's look at it.

Number one,

to experience true Christian unity,

we must build upon

some common Christian experiences.

Paul's writing to this church

and before he starts talking to them

about really, you know,

putting one another first

and be humble before one another,

he's trying to look at this church

and say,

there's a lot of things

you've got in common

that you share together.

And we looked at that

a little bit last week

in verse one.

I want to look at

just one thing right here.

He says,

we've all experienced

encouragement in Christ.

That word encouragement,

sometimes it's translated comfort,

sometimes it's translated help.

The idea is

we've experienced

encouragement, comfort, help

through having a relationship

with Jesus Christ.

For an example,

if you're a Christian,

you know what it's like

to be forgiven of your sins.

Some people in this room may,

you may have before

you became a Christian

or at some point in your life

through what you did sinfully,

you confessed it,

you repented,

you know what it's like

to have a great weight

of guilt removed from you.

But all of us as Christians,

we know,

we have this common understanding,

I am a forgiven child of God.

I'm no longer guilty.

I have to hang my head

and walk around

with my head down anymore.

Another thing we have in common is

we have assurance as Christians

that we are children of God.

We're not like everybody else

in the world.

We're children of God.

Now and will be for all eternity.

Sharing common experiences

of any kind

has a way of drawing people

close together.

That's why people who play sports,

they do things together.

They work hard together.

People who are in the band,

people who, you know,

are together at work

and do some good things together.

It just draws you together.

This is a good reason

why it's good for families

to do all kinds of things together.

Think about it.

Spring is not far

and there's a lot of people

in this room

as spring comes

you're going to be outside more.

There's things you're going to

need to do

and want to do

in your yard,

in a garden.

Get your children involved.

That is something

that you can do together,

work together.

It can build

good relationships.

Your children need to learn to work

so let them work with you

and make it a positive experience.

But don't let it all be work.

Children and parents

need to do some fun things together.

Play together.

Find ways

where

you just

laugh.

You have fun.

You do things

that you all enjoy.

It brings you together,

doesn't it?

Even eating meals together.

I know there can be

some wars at the table

but eating meals together

can be that thing

that sort of brings you together.

I'm not talking about

just parents

with children at home.

I want to encourage you,

you've got brothers and sisters,

you've got parents,

you have adult children,

don't just

all go your separate ways

and lose the bond,

the closeness

that God intends for us to have

until death takes people out.

Do things with your adult children.

Do things with your parents.

Do things with your older brothers,

grown brothers and sisters.

Keep those relationships alive

if you can,

if they'll allow you to.

Now,

all of us who are members

of this church

have many common

spiritual experiences

that can

be used by God

to draw us closer together

as a church family.

think about them sometimes.

Talk about them.

Some of your common

spiritual experiences

with one another

and build

something more than

a shallow,

superficial relationship.

Number two,

to experience true Christian unity,

we must develop

a common Christian mindset.

mindset.

Not uniformity

we talked about last week.

Everybody's not going to think

the same way

about everything,

but what we're talking about

is something specific here.

Look,

he says,

complete my job

of being of the same mind,

having the same love,

being in full accord

and of one mind.

To summarize

what we looked at last week,

the key for a church

to experience

family-like unity

can be found

in two statements.

Number one,

we must love one another

with self-giving love.

If we're going to be

a true family here,

we've got to learn

to love one another

in this self-giving,

patient kind of way

and not go around

with our feelings

on our sleeves,

least little slight,

least little whatever,

and we're offended

and we withdraw.

Look at what

the kind of love

we're talking about involves.

Now,

this also is the kind of love

that we need to have

in our homes,

parents and children,

children and parents,

brothers and sisters.

Wake up,

brothers and sisters.

Look on this screen.

Love is patient

and kind.

Love does not envy

or boast.

It is not arrogant

or rude.

It does not insist

on its own way.

It is not irritable

or resentful.

It does not rejoice

at wrongdoing,

but rejoices

with the truth.

Love bears all things,

believes all things,

hopes all things,

endures all things.

Love never ends.

This is the kind of love

that we need to develop,

we need to work on,

really in all

of our relationships.

What we're talking about here,

among one another

and always in your home.

Second thing

that will help us

to be united,

we must focus

on our purpose

and work together

to accomplish it.

We looked at this

last week.

I don't want to spill it.

It's been a great deal

on that.

We exist for this.

In the book of Acts,

the first summary statement

of what the church

was doing,

they were worshiping,

evangelizing,

learning,

and loving.

That's what we're

called to do.

That's how we fulfill

the great commission

that the Lord

has given us.

You know,

in a church family,

we don't get to choose

who we will

or won't love.

It's like in your family.

I mean,

if you're going to really

be a strong family,

it doesn't matter

what your brother

or sister is like.

They're your brother

or sister.

And a lot of you

have close interactions

with more extended family.

You're cousins.

You don't get to choose

who they are.

That's decided for you.

And we just have to learn

to love one another.

And a lot of times

and a lot of ways

we do that at home.

And what Paul's talking about

is we've got to bring it

to the church.

We've got to love

one another.

Warts and all.

Differences and all.

Do you try to express

this kind of love

in some of the relationships

that you already have

here in this church?

Not be easily offended,

but really

give yourself to people

this way.

We're also called

to fulfill the Lord's

great commission

by being this well church.

And I want to ask you this.

Are you helping us

do that in some way?

Every Christian has

spiritual gifts,

talents, and abilities

that God expects us,

calls us,

commands us

to use in our church

or through some of the

ministries of our church

to glorify Him,

to help other people

come to know Christ,

to help people grow

in their relationship

with the Lord,

to meet real needs

that people have.

How are you involved?

I know we're not

doing a lot right now

because of the

COVID situation,

but how were you involved

before we sort of

put things on hold?

How do you plan

to be involved

when things

pick back up

and come to the,

what will be

a new normal?

Let's look on now

at the third way

to build church unity.

Look at this.

To experience true

Christian unity,

we must work daily

on our common

Christian responsibility

to humble ourselves.

I want you to look

at what he says here,

verses three and four.

Do nothing from

selfish ambition

or conceit,

but in humility

count others

more significant

than yourselves.

Let each of you

look not only

to his own interest,

but also to the

interest of others.

Let's look at

the specifics here.

Number one,

we can't promote

ourselves over

other people.

Do nothing from

selfish ambition

or conceit.

Note two phrases.

Number one,

selfish ambition

refers to self-promotion.

Conceit,

or some translations

you have,

says vain conceit.

It refers to

seeking glory

for yourself

that is not deserved.

Now the thought

may come into your mind,

don't seek glory

for yourself

that's not deserved.

How do I know

if mine's deserved?

Don't seek glory

for yourself

and you don't have

to worry about it.

Just don't seek

glory for yourself.

Call attention

to yourself

and you won't have

to worry about

whether it's deserved

or not.

You know,

as I was,

you know,

studying this,

thinking about this,

we see it a lot

in the sports world,

especially among

professional athletes.

If you read a lot,

watch things

on ESPN

and so forth,

interviews,

what people are saying

about one another

and so forth,

there's a lot

of professional athletes

who complain about

not getting

the respect

they deserve.

when I read

a lot of these athletes

making multi-million

dollar salaries,

living just totally

ungodly lives

and thinking of no one

on the team

but themselves,

I think about how

absurd it is

for them to complain

about,

I don't get the proper

respect I should.

There's one thing

we need to make clear

this morning.

We can't demand

respect of other people.

You can't demand

people around you

respect you.

Now let me take

the time out here

with exceptions.

The Bible calls us

to respect our parents

throughout their life.

Boys and girls

and all of us

in this room

if our parents

are alive,

it's our God-given

responsibility

to respect them.

And boys and girls

at home,

if you show

disrespect

to your mother

or father,

they need to

just wear you

out

for your lack

of respect

and make you

at least show

respect for them

as the authorities

of the home

because that is

a God-given

authority picture.

There are

God-given

authorities

in the scripture

and parents

are one,

a main one

who do,

can make you

as children,

you've got to

show me respect.

You may not mean it.

They can't make you

mean it.

They can make you

show it

or suffer

serious consequences

and good parents

will make their

children show

respect

or suffer

the consequences

of not doing it.

That is important.

But outside

of the commands,

the authority

structures

of the world,

we can't demand

respect.

Respect is

something we've

got to earn

by our character,

by our work ethic,

by the way

that we treat

other people.

You know,

a lot of these

professional athletes,

they could,

they would be

respected more

if they focus

on being a better

teammate,

if they focus

on being a

better human

being.

They would find

that they're

respected more

within their team

by their opponents,

their coaches,

their fans.

If you want to

develop closer

relationships with

people in your

life everywhere,

at home,

church,

wherever,

don't promote

yourself.

arrogance is

not becoming

on anyone

anywhere.

Instead,

look at this,

we've got to

humble ourselves.

We must not

think too highly.

We must not

think of ourselves

as being better

than others,

the second part

of verse 3.

But in humility,

count others

more significant

than yourselves.

I want to

explain this

with a story.

A.T.

Robertson,

in the early

part of the

1900s,

he was one

of the most

respected

New Testament

Greek scholars

in the English

speaking world.

He wrote

about 25 books

including a

1,500 page

grammar of the

Greek New

Testament.

He wrote a

verse-by-verse

commentary on the

entire New

Testament that

explains the

meaning of

every major

Greek word.

He was also

a full-time

professor at

the Southern

Baptist Theological

Seminary in

Louisville,

Kentucky.

He was up

there with

few peers

as a scholar,

as a Christian

scholar in his

day.

His father-in-law

was John

Broadus.

Broadus was

one of the

founders of

Southern Seminary.

He was also a

New Testament

scholar.

He was respected

but nowhere near

the level of

Robertson.

Now both were

buried in the

Cave Hill

Cemetery in

Louisville,

Kentucky.

Broadus died

first.

Much older,

so you would

expect that.

He did.

Broadus died

first.

His grave is

marked by a

towering monument

erected by his

family.

That wasn't his

desire, but his

family chose to

erect a monument

over his grave.

Well, next to

Broadus' monument

is the flat,

level with the

ground grave

marker of A.T.

Robertson.

It was

Robertson's

request to

be buried in

Broadus' shadow.

And I read

that, I just

thought, what

humility.

A.T.

Robertson knew

who he was.

He knew what

he had

accomplished.

He knew what

his status was

as a scholar

in his day,

and that brought

us a great

man.

But nowhere

near his

level.

But he

chose,

requested,

to be buried

in what

the world

would say,

a lesser

man's

shadow.

That's the

kind of

attitude

that enables

us to

humble

ourselves

and count

others more

significant

than ourselves.

that's the

kind of

attitude we

need to

demonstrate in

this church

and in

our homes.

Now, some

husbands and

wives need to

work on this.

I haven't got

any kind of

emails or

letters or

calls, but

let me just

say this,

men.

Let your

wife and

children decide

if you should

be treated

like a king.

Don't you

demand it.

If you do,

you're an

arrogant

rascal.

Ladies,

let your

husband and

children decide

if you should

be treated

like a queen.

Don't

demand it.

It's

unbecoming

to be that

prideful.

Now, boys

and girls,

young people,

teenagers,

some brothers

and sisters

need to work

on developing

humility

and counting

their brother

or their

sister or

their parents

more important

than me.

You hear

that?

And

regardless of

what your

parents may

say or do,

you are not

a princess

or a prince.

I know

some of the

parents today,

you have this

mindset, you

treat your

child, your

girl as if

she's some

kind of

princess that

can do no

wrong.

There's a few

that even

treat their

boy as if

he's some

kind of

prince who's

never done

wrong.

Let me tell

you about what

your children

are.

Your children

are selfish,

self-centered

sinners just

like you

are.

And just

like I

am.

They can

be arrogant,

they can be

selfish and

self-centered,

just like we

all can be

arrogant and

selfish and

self-centered.

It's hard to

do, I don't

know any kind

of easy lesson,

but we as

parents, we

need to model

and then we

need to teach

our children

how to

humble

themselves,

not think

they're some

kind of prince

or princess,

and to think

of others

more

significant

than

themselves.

Paul provides

more details

about what

humility involves.

Look at this,

we must not

be so self-centered

that we fail to

look out for the

interests of

others.

I want you to

think about this.

Look at the

verse.

Let each of you

look not only to

his own interests,

but also to the

interests of

others.

Note that he

says we should

not look only to

our interests.

Do you

understand?

It's just a part

of human nature

to take care of

yourself.

Jesus,

talking about the

second greatest

commandment,

said to love

your neighbor

as yourself.

That is not a

command to love

yourself.

We already do.

It's just human

nature.

We love

ourselves.

We look out

for ourselves.

In fact,

in some ways,

important ways,

it's a part of our

Christian responsibility

to provide for

ourselves and our

family and not be

dependent on other

people.

We've talked about

that in a day

gone by.

talking about the

importance of

working and saving

and investing and

the awful way that

socialism will lead

this country and ruin

our lives.

I just had to throw

that in a lot of the

socialistic Congress

and president that we

have today.

Just to throw it out

there, keep it on

people's minds.

They are not looking

out for our best

interests as

Christians in this

world who desire to

live according to the

truth of God.

And we need to keep

that in mind.

Living humbly before

others is not an easy

thing to do.

It is contrary to our

selfish and self-centered

sinful nature.

But it can be done.

There are no commands.

There are no instructions

in the Bible for us to

do anything that we

cannot do.

Paul is telling us

here that we can't live

this way as a church

family.

We can't have healthy

families in our homes

humbling ourselves,

putting others first.

The key to doing this

though is to first

humble ourselves before

God.

I want you to look at

this.

Peter explains this in

1 Peter.

He says,

Clothe yourselves,

all of you, with

humility toward one

another, for God

opposes the proud, but

he gives grace to the

humble.

Boys and girls,

teenagers, adults,

God opposes the

proud.

God will humble the

proud.

Make no mistake.

He says,

humble yourselves

therefore under the

mighty hand of God

so that at the

proper time he may

exalt you.

At the proper time he

will exalt you.

As we live in humble

dependence upon God,

he'll supply us with

everything we need to

obey him in this

matter.

One of the things that

God will supply us is

the Holy Spirit who

lives in us if we're

Christians.

It's the Holy Spirit's

work to give us

desires and then give

us the ability to live

this kind of life.

In fact, Paul describes

the work of the Holy

Spirit, he talks about

the fruit of the Spirit.

Some people describe the

fruit of the Spirit as the

character of Jesus.

It's in Galatians

Galatians 5 · chapter mention

chapter 5.

The fruit of the Spirit is

love, joy, peace,

patience, kindness,

goodness, faithfulness,

gentleness, self-control,

these kind of things.

If we're Christians, the

Spirit of God works within

us to help us to develop.

It's a lifetime endeavor to

help us develop this kind

of character.

And by God's grace, we can

make progress over time,

trial and error.

Like Swindoll says, three

steps forward, two steps

back.

But even that is progress.

Now, based on what you see

in this passage about

growing closer together as a

real church family, what do

you need to do to make this

happen here in our church?

Or if God's spoken to you

about making your home a

closer-knit family, what do

you need to do?

Would we be a closer

church family if you would

stop talking negatively or

critically about other

church members?

Would we be a stronger,

closer-knit church family if

you'd start saying positive

things?

Go out of your way to affirm

people.

Would your home be better?

Would your home be better if

you just stopped that

negative complaining, fighting

with your brother or sister,

whining to your parents,

disobeying them?

Would we be a closer church

family if you'd stop promoting

yourself, trying to call

attention to yourself?

Would your home be stronger if

you didn't try to make

everything about you?

Would we be a closer church

family if you started paying

attention to other people?

Noticing something's not quite

right.

And because you love them and

you care about them, you sort

of, you try to inquire, is

there something wrong?

Is there something I could help

you with?

And then you do.

Would our church family be a

stronger church family if we

would inconvenience ourselves

for the benefit of somebody

else?

Even make sacrifices of our

time to serve somebody else, a

brother or sister?

I want you to think about it.

What is God calling you to do or

stop doing to make us a closer

church family?

Well, I want to encourage you to

obey Him.

And then, what's the Lord calling

you to do or stop doing to make

your home a closer-knit family?

Make that commitment.

It won't be easy.

By God's grace, the indwelling

Spirit of God, you can be the kind

of church brother or sister that we

need.

You can be the loving member of your

home family that everyone needs and

wants you to be.

Let's pray and ask God to help us be

there.

Would you join with me?

Dear God, help us to see right now how

we should respond to you so that we can

be contributing family members to a

close, loving, serving together.

church family call, pickings first

Baptist.

And then, Father, show us parents,

children, siblings, how we should

respond to make our homes better, more

positive, more loving.

Let's listen to the Lord and obey Him as

we just go through a time, attitude of

prayer, listen to God, take it seriously,

and respond to Him.

to God so far, listen to God.

Right now, today, we need some

things.

Come with us.

Welcome to God.

Let's pray for us.

And that's right for you.

Let's pray.

Will —

Please go ahead.

And there's not as is,

you know?

Oh,

good reason.

Just do love for you able to

to transform.