What If Church Is Your Family Life Support // Guest Speaker Pastor Rick Stonestreet

Well, it's a blessing to be here today.

God bless all of you for coming.

Thank you.

Beautiful Northern California.

You just can't beat it.

And uh I love being with Nathan and Angela, and my wife came up with me.

That's the choice.

No, I'm just kidding.

Uh, but it was a blessing, and so we're we're delighted to be here uh here at First Christian Church.

Uh I pastored here in town for nearly 26 years, and uh so it's uh it's just an honor to be here, and I hope that you guys are having a great day.

I love your friendliness, I love the the life that that your church has, and that's what it's about, you know, because Jesus is the living word, and I'm thankful for that.

Um, take your Bibles if you would and turn to Deuteronomy chapter six.

Um, you know, we you know would Nathan grow up, you know, Nathan loves shoes.

I mean, he still does.

I remember he grew up, and the big thing in in the day when he was growing up was the Air Jordans.

I mean, I guess he had every, you know, every other month they came out, he wanted a pair of those.

And they weren't five dollars, you know.

And so I remember we were buying, you know, all these shoes, and we we would buy them, but Nathan, man, when he got them, he'd jump on them, wear them.

And I got, by the way, I got my cowboy boots, man.

We're from we're for Roy Rogers country, amen.

And uh so down in uh down in Hesperia, Victorville, Apple Valley's right there.

And uh thank you for those of you who wore your cowboy boots.

I have my hat out in the car.

Yeah, yeah.

Um, but uh, I remember Nate that he would he would put on these shoes, he'd jump around, you know, he'd look at, he'd walk out like this, and every now and then he'd hit a mud puddle you had to check those out, you know.

And uh so it was really cool that that we're able to, you know, just see that.

And I told him one day, I said it's on you after this, man.

You know, I bought you 900 pair, you got to buy the next ones, you know.

And uh so it's it's a blessing to be here in his church and meeting you folks.

And uh, you know, you know, the home is a wonderful place.

God is the God of the family, and I'm glad that God is a family God.

He's not just for the individual, but he's for the whole family.

And I'm so delighted that he is that kind of a God.

That's what we taught our children about.

We're in Deuteronomy chapter six in your Bibles, if you would take and turn there with me.

And if we could stand out of respect to God's word, I'd like to read just a few verses from this chapter.

We're in Deuteronomy chapter six, verses four, and we'll read down through verse nine.

Give you a moment to stretch, not go to sleep.

Here's what the Bible says Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God is one Lord.

Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.

And these words which I command thee this day shall be in thine heart, and thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up, and thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes, and thou shalt write them upon the post of thy house and on thy gates.

Heavenly Father, thank you for your word.

Thank you for what it means, Lord, and we pray you would just help families today, Lord, here at First Christian Church, Lord, that we help them to be uh fortified, be anchored in these great truths that you find here, that you give to us through the inspiration of the Holy Spirit through the writer Moses.

We pray and ask these things in Jesus' name, amen.

Thank you, and you may be seated.

Can you imagine having a family where the children decide the menu, where the children decide what time to get up, where the children decide what time to go to bed, where the children decide the rules that are in the house.

Probably most of you like me, I would call that chaos.

And here we find that God has some answers to that.

Today, unfortunately, many Christian families have found themselves operating very much like that.

Not because there's absentee parents, but because they have allowed the spiritual steering wheel to be handed over to their children, and that has caused problems in the home.

You know, when you think about it, we've confused loving our children with letting them lead, and that's a problem.

My wife and I we've we've really tried as best we could to make our home what I'm gonna call a sanctuary.

That's what it should be.

A sanctuary.

Moses saw the danger of what I just said 3,500 years ago when he pinned these words under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit of God.

And God gave to Moses a spiritual blueprint.

He outlined that for us here in this chapter: a a blueprint, a pathway dealing with the home and the family.

They lived in a pagan world.

In that pagan world around them, there were gods and multiple gods, and and uh and the Israelites were trying to figure out who, you know, how to walk with God, how to teach their children, how to do all those things.

And and they were being influenced by all of the paganism and and the immorality, and all the rest of that sounds very similar to how we live today.

That's the culture we live in.

And so the scriptures wrote down for us an understanding that God here has the answer to that.

That's why we come to church.

We we want to find what God thinks about these things.

You want to find out what Hollywood thinks about it, just watch the movies.

You want to find out what philosophers say, read the philosophy.

But if we really want to know what's going to matter, the creator of the home is God, we need to go to what does God think about these things?

What is it that God wants us to know?

How can we best make our home a sanctuary?

Well, I find here there are three ingredients that God gives us through these verses.

These three ingredients can be transforming, can change your family.

Number one, I just want to help you today.

That's I'm here to help.

I prayed, I prayed when uh Nathan invited me to come and preach here.

I pray, dear God, help me to be a help and a blessing to you.

And so that's what I want to be.

And I hope it'll help.

There are three ingredients he gives us.

Number one is we're to understand that parents are the God-appointed leaders.

It's the parents who lead the home.

And I notice here in verse number four, can I get you to draw your attention down to verse number four?

The Bible says it this way here or Israel, the Lord our God is one Lord.

There's only one God.

And the problem is in the day of Moses is very much like us, the gods all around them, they were competing for the affection of God.

And I love this passage because here in this passage, it talks about the fact that when you look that if God, if the God appointed leaders in the home is the parents, then we need to understand that God puts a premium on what he means by that in verse four.

Here, that's the word Shema, that's the Hebrew word.

And and what it means is this like if you were to go to Israel today, every home in Israel has what they call mezuzah.

How many of you know what a mezuzah is?

Anyone?

Okay, so it has a mezuzah.

Inside will be a copy, a Hebrew written copy of Deuteronomy 6, 4, and 5.

And what it's what it in that pat in that um in that mezuzah, the scriptures is teaching the family that God is who we love.

That we need to love God more than we love anything else.

He's number one.

He's not second place, he's not an afterthought, he's not something that we just kind of add on a Sunday, but God is God and we want to put him there first place.

And so every home and every family needs to understand that.

And what we want to do is drive that into the hearts and lives of our kids.

That's what we need.

They need to know that God is number one, he's more important than sports, he's more important than socials and all the rest of the things that the world so much competes against God, they need to understand that God should be first.

And Moses was writing this not in the sense that we assume they're getting it, but that we have the assurance that they will get it.

The assurance that our kids will understand that they will get it.

And that means that we have to regularly, repetitively teach them and drive on their hearts the fact that God is more important than anything else.

He's more important than our talents, he's more important than our looks, he's more important than our money, he's more important than anything.

He's number one.

That's what we need.

Every home needs that.

And I'm and I'm today, I'm so concerned about homes because it seems as though for them, for many homes, that that God is sort of an afterthought.

It's so funny.

I'm a chaplain with the uh Samarita County Sheriff's Department.

And when I'm down there and I get in the car, we'll go out with the deputies.

And almost invariably, every deputy almost, it's almost without exception.

You know, one of the things, I don't know if you guys realize, but but many of the calls that officers go to, generally speaking, are domestics.

It's children, husband, wife, we're fighting.

Man, I see more home fights than I ever saw on TV and boxing or whatever.

Everywhere.

People just, I mean, they just can't get along and they fight.

And and all these deputies will say, you know what they really need?

They'll say this to me.

I said, What?

They said they need God in their life.

That's what they'll say to me.

And I said, That's what we're trying to do.

Send them over to our church.

We'll tell them about God, we'll tell them how to get God in their life.

Sometimes I wish they would just say, once you go in there and talk to them, that'll take care of everything.

Not me.

God will.

And so God has appointed you parents to be the leader in your home.

He's appointed you to be the one and to teach them to love God.

By the way, this is not a lecture, but a leadership strategy.

It's a focus.

It's a it's a determined effort.

That's why he says teach it diligently.

Do you realize the number one greatest commodity you have in your home is T-I-M-E.

Time.

And unfortunately, we don't take the time with our kids.

I once read, and I don't know if it's true or not, but I read this, and I don't even know who figures all this out, but I read this, I did some study on it, and psychologists and whoever said it in the survey that the average parent spends about two to three minutes a day with their kids.

I don't know if that's true or not, but if it were two to three minutes, it's no wonder we're having problems.

If we're going to teach our kids to love God, we need to spend time with them.

And I'm so thankful that we have the Bible to tell us that we're to teach them what?

Number one, to love God.

That's what Joshua said.

As for me in my house, we will serve the Lord.

And what he's saying is this we didn't vote on this.

This wasn't a democracy, it's a theocracy where that's what God wants.

And I'm telling you that God, Moses, Joshua's saying this, and God, Joshua's saying, I have decided our family, we're serving God.

God's number one.

And you know what God's saying to us?

He ought to be number one in our homes.

He's got to be number one.

Number one before anything else.

You know, so many parents are, and and and I'm not, you know, I'm preaching now, okay?

Can you take it?

So many parents want their kids to be great athletes and great musicians and all that stuff, and we forgot we need to make them great Christians for God.

That's what we really need to do.

And it's teach them to love God.

And I love that we can look into the scriptures and we say, well, it's really hard to train kids.

One person said it this way training a child to follow Christ is easy for parents, for all they have to do is lead the way.

You have to lead the way.

You can't, you cannot in any way train them unless you have walked in the path.

You've led, you've gone ahead.

Children will follow what you do.

They will look at it that way.

Think of it this way: a ship's captain.

The captain doesn't ask the passengers which direction to go.

He doesn't ask them what how we should, how how fast we should go.

He simply studies the maps and the weather patterns and and and what's happening out on the sea.

And then when he goes out, all of those who ride along, and then he has those who help him, and you know what he's doing?

He's helping them so they can learn that one day when they captain their boat, they'll be ready.

And parents, you disciple your children so that one day, one day, they'll have their own family, and they will understand how this works.

That's what Moses is saying.

So, number one is parents should lead.

And I really believe that you as a parent should lead your children.

We used to say it this way.

We used to joke around.

I say, listen, the inmates don't run the asylum.

I do.

That's the way it should be.

So that's the very first ingredient that's really important if we're gonna have a Christ-centered home, a home that honors God, that that can, you know, correct, if you would, what's going on in society.

It all starts with God.

God wasn't, again, an afterthought, he is the focal point of everything.

So that's the first.

The second ingredient is that the church should be central, it should be the hub of everything in the home.

Jesus is called the rock in scripture for a reason.

He's our anchor.

It means that we need to know Christ as Savior.

Have you accepted him as Savior?

Do you know him?

Are you assured that you have a relationship with Jesus Christ and you have a home in heaven?

And we're not talking about uh uh just, you know, some some fledgy little lip service thing, but we're talking about realizing that we're sinners.

We can't go to heaven on our own, that we need Jesus Christ.

He's the only hope that we have, and we turn to him and we ask him to be our savior.

That's what it means.

That believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and thou shalt be saved, the Bible says.

But when we get that, then we need the church, we need to be connected to the church.

Occasionally, we've had people in our church that have gotten very sick and they've been connected to a life support system.

That's their connection.

They needed it.

I have one friend of mine, he's a chaplain, pastor friend of mine.

He's down in Yucca Valley.

And and he several years ago just he just passed out and he was having all kinds of problems he didn't know about inside.

And you know, that's what happens sometimes.

You have things going on inside you don't know.

And and his body was just kind of shutting down, and he passed out.

They took him, he had to put him on life support.

He was on life support for six months and had to work through a whole series of things.

He couldn't get off of it.

If he would have gotten off of the life support system then, you know what would have happened?

He would have died.

And what I'm saying is this the church is like that life support system for us.

We want to be connected to it.

We want our families to be connected to it so that when problems come or difficulties come or there's things going on in my life, that connection, that that life support system is looking on the inside and trying to help us to be where we should be, to do what we should do, to help us when we have problems, to help us when we have struggles, to help us when we're going through things we we can't figure out.

It's it's there at that place where God can really work in our hearts.

And I know sometimes people are struggling, they struggle with these matters, and they're trying to figure out what we do.

The Bible says it this way: forsake not the assembly together as a manner of some miss.

What does he mean by that?

That means church is the anchor point.

That was being written in a time when to be a Christian could mean you could lose your life, you would die.

Great persecution was going on.

And when that was written in Hebrews, it was written to help believers to realize that that when we come to the Lord's house, that we cannot live our Christian life in isolation, that we are not freelance Christians that are not connected, but we find that place where we can we can hear the word of God, where we can worship God, where we can serve God, where we can give to God, where we can help God's people, where we can get the mission out.

That's what it's about.

For the early Christians, skipping the gathering was like cutting off the oxygen.

They couldn't do it.

I like what one man said.

He said, some families think the church is like a convention where you send a delegate, and usually it's your mother.

Wow.

That's not how it works.

We come to church, it's for all of us.

Church is a place where we come to worship God and honor Him.

But it's not just church attendance, it's engagement.

We need to be involved.

We don't just show up, we come ready and prepared.

We want to hear from God.

We want God to do something in our family and God to do something in our life.

We want God to change us.

Be connected to a church is that life's support for us spiritually.

It's that which will really matter, it's that which will change us.

And what you expose your children to, by the way, will impact their lives.

Life, and that's how they'll live.

Our Kent Hughes said this about the church.

He said, church is central to history, church is central to the gospel, and church is central to Christian living.

And I think he's got it right.

I'm amazed over the years in being pastoring a longtime old guy.

And I'm amazed how over the years in pastoring churches, some of the things that I've seen decisions that families have made that have been detrimental to their family.

They don't realize it.

I mean, I try to be very merciful and very gracious and very understanding, and we all fumble the ball.

How many agree with that?

We fumble the ball?

Yeah, we mess up.

You know, we just drop it.

Oh, I shouldn't have done that.

But I've seen families do this.

Here's what I mean.

I have seen families do something like this.

And this is like repetitively enough that I remember it.

They their their kids are going to a maybe a youth program, and then and then you know they're gonna they're gonna have a special social or something, and the kid does something and they punish the kid since you can't go to that church thing.

And we'll let them go.

But then the next week they'll let them go out and go to the baseball game or do this or do that.

In other words, the decisions they're making is detrimental to their family because they've not let church be center in their family.

Are you with me?

That happens often.

You see, church is it.

We need it.

It's our central, it's our life support, our spiritual life support.

Let me make a recommendation and move on to the last point.

Next Sunday, arrive early.

Sometimes it's hard to arrive early.

I don't know how many of your early risers.

How many early risers in here?

There's the godly ones right there, right there.

Amen.

That's only like five.

Wow.

People in the bay, man.

You guys are in Southern California.

We started two services and we had an 8:30 service, and they griped and complained and whined about 8:30.

I'm like, man, you guys in the desert won't get up out of bed.

I'm an early riser, so it's, you know, it's but come early.

Get prepared.

Bring your notebook if need be.

And on the way home, talk about the message.

Secondly, not only make it next week, but make it the rhythm of your life.

Make church a normal.

I don't know about you, but like if I miss one Sunday, maybe I've been sick or maybe I'm traveling.

And I've had that happen a few times.

You know what?

You know what goes on?

I like, it seems like weeks before I ever get back.

You know why?

Because the rhythm has been a part of my life.

Let me give you one more and I'll be done.

Families should pray together.

If you want to humble a man, ask him about his prayer life.

No, that's not only true, but it's also true about families.

Paul says we ought to pray without ceasing.

That doesn't mean we go over here in a corner and we just kind of ignore our life and we just sit with our eyes closed and pray all day long and then we go to bed.

That's not what he's saying.

He's saying we have a spirit of prayer.

Everywhere we go, we pray.

We have a heart of prayer.

Zig Ziglar used to say this the family that prays together stays together.

But it's much more than a cliche when the family adds the dimension of praying together in church.

The truth becomes even stronger.

Pick a time for your family to pray.

I'm gonna tell you something.

It's not going to be given to you.

You got to get it.

You got to get it.

It's got to be that way.

So let me encourage you today, pray with your family.

Might be like we're after dinner.

Here's a suggestion.

You might try this.

How many of you eat in here?

Okay, I thought you did.

I just want to make sure.

How many of you like barbecue?

Oh, amen.

That's good preaching, isn't it?

I like barbecue.

I make it, cook it, eat it, dream about it.

Okay, I really like it.

But you know, like after you get done eating your meal and everyone's sitting at the table, because most people don't miss that, then you know it's a good time when you just before you clear the table, just take a moment and say this.

What's one prayer request you have?

What's one prayer request you have?

What one prayer request you have?

Go all around the table, just real quick, add us maybe a scripture to that every now and then, and then just pray for like two minutes and then go.

Everyone has two minutes.

Everyone has two or three minutes they could pray.

You know what that's doing?

That's building within your family that God's number one that will change your family.

Let's pray.

Let's pray.

We need some Joshua type families today.

Ask for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.

It's not a democracy, it's a declaration, it's a resolution.

And I pray today that God will help us to take very seriously these truths that Moses was talking about 3,500 years ago.

Let's pray.

Heavenly Father.