Broken Together - Marriage As a Vehicle of Acceptable Worship

This podcast is a ministry of Grant Parkway Baptist Church.

Helping people know, enjoy, and glorify God.

For more information about Grant Parkway, visit GrantProquay.org.

As the old hymn says, we need you every hour.

Most gracious God, we don't just need you a little bit today.

Our need for you grows.

The more we know you, it's not like we need you, so let's become Christians.

No, as believers, as sons and daughters of God, we never get beyond needing you.

And the longer we know you, the more we need you because we understand that we've been missing out on that much of God.

And so we've come not out of desperation today, but out of understanding.

Our need is an informed need.

It's not a fawning, palling, uninformed, groping in the dark.

I hope somebody's out there need.

No, it's the need that says, My God will never leave me nor forsake me.

What can man do to me?

It's this liberating reality that says the king is one.

And so I can risk losing because the king is one.

And so again, Holy Spirit, lead us into the truth of the gospel in all its many splendid ways.

Manifest the beauty of God and the truth of the gospel in this time.

We pray.

We pray now, we listen in Jesus' name.

And everyone said, Amen.

You can have a seat.

If you've got a Bible, I invite you to take it and open it up to Hebrews chapter 12.

Hebrews 12 · chapter mention

Hebrews chapter 12.

Hebrews 12 · chapter mention

And if you're our guest, let me say, Welcome.

We are in a series entitled Broken Together, where we're just kind of looking at what the Bible says about marriage.

And every Sunday we look at a different passage in the Bible.

And today I want to talk to you about this topic that marriage is the vehicle of acceptable worship.

Marriage is a vehicle of acceptable worship.

And that will hopefully make more sense when we read the passage.

I'll start reading Hebrews chapter 12, verse 25.

Hebrews 12:25

But let me say this.

I'm trying to say this every week, and I and hopefully I think I've been faithful up to this point.

Marriage, why broken together?

Because marriage is not two perfect people that get together and act perfectly and live perfectly until they die.

No, it is two broken people who are by nature and by choice sinful and desperate and fallen and in need of redemption.

And God, the way God designed it was for two redeemed people, two Christians to get together and live in a covenant relationship that reflects God's relationship with his bride, the church.

That's the way God designed it.

It doesn't always happen that way because sometimes we fall in love or we kind of let down our standards and we we marry somebody.

So some people are married as a Christian to an unchristian, uh, a non-Christian, an unbeliever, and that's difficult.

Uh and the Bible speaks to that and says, hey, that's not going to be easy.

Matter of fact, it's like two yoke of ox, one stronger than the other, and he and he outpulls the other one.

And so the Bible's very clear about what it says about marriage, and never is it more clear in what it says about marriage than this passage we'll look at this morning.

Hebrews chapter 12, verse 25.

Hebrews 12:25

He says, See that you do not refuse him who is speaking.

For if they did not escape, when they refused him who warned them on earth, much less will they escape if we reject him who warns from heaven.

Let me stop right here.

Look at me, beloved.

When the Bible says, see that you not do not refuse him who is speaking, that's not talking about me today.

You realize that, right?

Hello?

Okay.

I've heard preachers before say, you know, that's the Bible placing emphasis on the pastor.

No, it's not.

Okay?

When the Bible says, see that you do not refuse him who is speaking.

For if they did not escape when they refused him who warned them on earth, that's a reference to Jesus.

Much less will we escape if we reject him who warns from heaven.

At that time, verse 26, his voice shook the earth.

But now he has promised, yet once more I will shake not only the earth, but also the heavens.

This phrase yet once more indicates the removal of things that are shaken.

That is, things that have been made, in order that the things that cannot be shaken may remain.

Therefore, let us be grateful for receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken.

And thus let us offer to God acceptable worship with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.

Now, what he says at the end of chapter 12 there, so let us offer to God acceptable worship with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.

And then he begins to unpack some practical ways, some practical manifestations of what the Bible considers acceptable worship.

In chapter 13, verse 1, here's an example.

Let brotherly love continue.

Here's another one.

Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unaware.

Verse 3, remember those who are in prison, and those in prison with them, and those who are mistreated, since you also are in need.

And verse 4 is where I want to put the plow in the ground this morning.

Here's another practical application of what acceptable worship is to a God that you worship with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.

He's not this grandpa in a big chair in heaven who kind of offers up suggestions that you kind of take or dismiss at your discretion.

He says in verse 4, let marriage be held in high honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.

Keep your life free from the love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, I will never leave you nor forsake you.

So we can confidently say, The Lord is my helper, I will not fear.

What can man do to me?

Marriage is a vehicle of acceptable worship.

Let me just say this marriage is not an end in itself.

If it's only a man and a woman, then you can do and define marriage however you see fit.

However, if marriage, as the Bible teaches, is a reflection of the gospel, it's a reflection of God's relationship with his pride, the church, then it's to be entered into differently and lived accordingly.

So what is it, what what does it mean to do marriage as a vehicle of acceptable worship?

It means four simple things right out of the Bible this morning.

Number one, it means that you honor the institution of marriage.

You honor the institution of marriage.

Now, I say that, and let me just acknowledge this.

When I say that in my spirit, I hear Jesus saying to his disciples, Behold, I'm sending you out as lamb as lambs among the wolves.

Now, when you say, when I say to you as your pastor, honor the institution of marriage.

I I'm not without an understanding of how our culture views marriage.

Let me, this is the most recent statistics that I could find.

This is from last year, February of 2014.

Uh that just gives a little snapshot.

Just listen to this.

Uh, because this is the way our culture thinks about marriage.

And it's in this context that the Bible and God and and your pathetic pastor is adding his voice and saying, yes, let's honor the institution of marriage in a culture that thinks this way.

Number one, the marriage rate in the United States is the lowest it's been in over a century.

Since 1970, the marriage rate has declined by almost 60%.

Secondly, most people live together before they marry.

An even higher number of divorced persons who remarry live together first.

And the new trend is seniors who live together with no plans to marry.

Which means some of you may have to look at your grandparents and say, hey, I know this is convenient because you both combined your social security checks, but what you call convenience, God calls sin.

Past the chicken.

Because it's like, oh, I had a hard, I had a hard marriage, I got divorced, so God owes me to live immorally.

So second time around, I'm gonna test drive the car and see if I like it.

Third thing, unmarried cohabitation is particularly common among the young.

A quarter of unmarried women ages 25 to 39 are currently living with a partner, while more than 60% of first marriages are now preceded by living together compared to virtually none 50 years ago.

Fourthly, why am I telling you this?

Because it's into this context that God Almighty, who says, worship me acceptably with reverence and awe.

Because I'm a consuming fire.

Don't jerk with me, because I'll pull the world over and kill everybody and start over.

That's what he did with Noah.

Fourthly, marriage has shifted from being the cornerstone to the capstone of adult life, no longer the foundation on which young adults build their prospects for future prosperity and happiness.

Marriage now comes only after they have moved towards financial and psychological independence.

It's not the cornerstone.

What that God says to the original man and the original woman, be fruitful and multiply, fill the earth and subdue it.

We can't fill the earth and subdue anything.

We live in subjection to everything and we self-medicate because we are outside of God's design for marriage.

Fifthly, the presence of children in America has declined significantly since 1960.

This decline has reduced the child-centeredness of our nation and contributed to the weakening of the institution of marriage.

It's estimated that in the mid-1800s, more than 75% of all households contain children under the age of 18.

Let me say that again.

Because I know that we the the the the new young, and you know, your child is your pet.

I hear that a lot.

You know, we have a child, it's a chihuahua.

No, you don't.

You're pathetic.

Because I have children, and what you're doing is putting your yippie dog on the level of my children, and I want to come to your house and stomp your puppy.

Welcome to church.

It is estimated in the mid-1800s that more than 75% of all households contained children under the age of 18.

100 years later, over 100 years later, in 1960, this number had dropped slightly to less than half of all households.

In 2011, just five decades later, only 32% of households included children.

This obviously means that adults are less likely to be living with children, that neighborhoods are less likely to contain children, and that children are less likely to be a consideration in daily life.

Take this question home and look each other in the eye and say, Are we done having kids?

And I'm not trying to insert myself where it's none of my business.

But our ob our baby doctor, who belongs to another religion, said to my wife and I, after we, my wife was in her late 30s, uh, who had signed forms on our second child.

Can you you know there's a runs of risk?

Said, now have six more.

And we were like, we can barely afford these two.

And she said, profound moment in the doctor's office.

She said, the problem with America is the wrong kind of people have all the children.

So when I say, you know, let marriage be held in honor, what do you mean?

Honor the institution of marriage.

How do we honor the institution of marriage?

Let me just give you two takeaways.

Number one, you let what belongs to marriage stay in marriage.

You let what belongs to marriage stay in marriage.

So if you're six years old today, you are not exempt from honoring marriage.

You make decisions as a single person.

And the way you explain it to all your friends is you say, No, I don't do that because I have a high view of marriage.

I have a high view of marriage.

Well, what's that got to do with anything?

Because, see, as a Christian, now you can out yourself and say, because here's the reality: when we begin to press into the Bible, what the Bible says, we're going to realize that there's a lot of people that don't know Jesus.

They come to church because it's kind of cool and you make business connections or you can socialize, or because, well, that's where I was raised.

It's the South.

It's kind of like sweet tea.

It's part of our culture, not necessarily part of my experience.

But but how do you, how do you keep marriage?

How do you honor the institution of marriage?

Well, you let what belongs to marriage stay in marriage.

So if you're single, there's things that the Bible says belong to marriage.

And here's what's happened, beloved.

Listen very carefully.

What we've done is we've taken marriage and we've gutted all the things.

We've gutted marriage.

It's now this hollow, empty Trojan horse that we've kind of rolled out and said to culture, hey, isn't this awesome?

And culture looks back and says, No, it's not awesome.

More than half of you lived together before you got married.

Are you kidding me?

We don't respect you.

The salt has lost its saltiness.

See, we have emptied marriage and consumed it upon our lust, and now you want to act offended that the gay community has come along and said, We'll fill marriage with our lust.

You can't have it both ways, beloved.

Because the sin of the heterosexual community is just as sinful as the sin of the homosexual community.

You can't empty it and you consume it upon your lust and go, well, I'm 24.

It's my body.

I'm gonna do what I want.

Okay, great.

That's not biblical, it's it's sinful, but you can't empty marriage according to our lust and then preach to other people who want to redefine marriage according to theirs.

You can't have it both ways, beloved.

And so, what does it mean to honor marriage?

First of all, it lets what belongs to marriage stay in marriage.

So if you're 15 or you're 17 or you're 21 or you're 25, and people are like, hey, what's the deal?

You just some kind of a prude?

No, I just have a high view of marriage, and I'm waiting for a man who has an equally high, biblically informed view of marriage.

Okay.

Second thing, how do you honor what how do we honor marriage?

We submit to God's definition of it.

You submit to God's definition of marriage, and you say, Well, what page is that on?

It's all through the Bible.

If you kind of, for me, let me own this.

This is not a great definition, but it's my definition.

But if you just kind of read the Bible in an even a cursory manner, you'll be able to deduce this from the Bible's teaching.

What do you mean, God's definition of marriage?

This is the way I understand God to define marriage.

Marriage is an enduring covenant relationship between one man and one woman, which is designed to meet the needs of the individuals while reflecting the nature of God.

Let me say it again.

Marriage is an enduring covenant relationship because this, let me just confess, this sounds great and sexy, but all good ideas eventually erode into hard work.

Okay?

And I'll show you what I mean in a minute.

Marriage is an enduring covenant relationship between one man and one woman, which is designed to meet the needs of the individuals while reflecting the nature of God.

Okay?

You say, all right, check, got it, I'll write that down, put it on the refrigerator, point to my husband, and go, look at there.

Uh remember last week I told you the story about how the king is won?

Remember that?

Hello?

Yes?

Y'all are kind of like, man, you're amped up today.

Yeah, I'm I'm I'm beyond amped up.

I'm concerned that Christians are just kind of sitting here with our teeth in our mouth, letting the world just kick our head in.

And I'm not saying be angry, I'm saying have something to say.

Engage the culture in some kind of dialogue that exposes the thin, vapid, non-existent, truthful logic of what they say.

Instead of just like, well, who am I?

Judge you.

I mean, I mean, I mean, no, no, I don't know what you mean.

What do you mean?

I can define marriage like that, and I can tell to you to say to you, hey, by the way, the king is one.

And as I told the staff this morning when we met for prayer, hey, by the way, because somebody came up to me and said, hey, uh, uh, uh, okay, the king is one.

I don't get what the big deal about that is.

What the big deal about that is, Bubba, is that because the king is one, you can risk losing.

Like in this conversation, I'm not gonna have a comeback.

Tell me whatever you want to say about the sermon last Sunday.

Well, uh nothing.

I just, I mean, you, I thought that was really profound and I didn't get it.

Okay, that's great.

Well, what are you gonna say?

The king is one.

Here's what I mean when I say that because the king is one, we can risk losing.

I hate getting up the next day and smelling what I had for supper the night before.

Okay, on my list of pet peeves, that's like number two.

Okay?

I ain't gonna tell you what number one is, but that's number two.

Because I grew up with a pathetically lazy stepmom who never cleaned the kitchen.

So when I get up, I don't want to smell.

If we had like Mexican food the night before, I don't want to smell it, and I don't want to see it on the counter, okay?

So I got up Thursday morning, which is my day off, thinking this is awesome.

I'm gonna drink coffee, go play golf, do something like that.

I get up and I I mean, I don't get out of my bedroom and I'm like, Did I marry my stepmother?

Yeah.

I went right there.

Don't repeat that because she ain't here this morning.

And they yanked me in such a bad mood.

I was three steps out of bed and I was angry.

And so I went from walking like this to walking like this.

Walked in there and I just looked and I just thought, can these people not?

I mean, how hard is it?

The dishwasher is right there.

And all three lights are on, which means it's clean, it's sanitized, it's ready to be emptied, and it's ready to be filled.

You know, I work hard to provide this dishwasher and these granite countertops.

At least we could see them sometime.

I thought that in a nanosecond.

And then that little voice said, Hey, hey, big boy.

This uh is uh marriage.

You know, this is this meets the needs of the individuals right reflecting the nature of God.

There's two individuals, individuals are plural, because I'd written the definition out.

And I was like, man, this this captures it.

And that little voice called the Holy Spirit said, Let's capture this kitchen right here, because this would meet your wife's need.

Oh, did I tell you the reason my wife didn't clean the house is because she was playing goofy golf with a bunch of women and Katie?

Did I tell you that?

Talking about just break it off in me right there, and she said, I gotta leave early because I might want to go do some shopping in some stores out there in wherever it is where Torchy's tacos is.

So my wife's eating out and playing goofy golf with a bunch of goofy women, and I'm getting up cleaning the kitchen.

This is on Friday morning, by the way, excuse me.

I'm just like, what kind of world is this?

And that little voice said, Hey, by the way, because the king won, you can lose this argument right now by never having it, by never looking at your wife and kind of going, Hey, you know, I can't stand to smell food that I had the day before, and the day before that.

There's like two days worth of stuff on our counters.

And so I got up on Friday morning and I just cleaned the kitchen.

And my chest was hot about the first 10 minutes because I was so angry.

Not with my wife, just that I was having to do something.

Oh, I was just like, oh, what?

And that voice just kept saying, the king is one.

The big mouth.

And because the king is one, you can lose.

See, when you define marriage and say it's one man, one man and one woman, which is designed to meet the needs of the individuals.

Individuals is a plural.

It's not just me getting my needs met.

So I cleaned the kitchen, and my wife got up, and all she said was, just in passing, hey, thanks, babe.

This is how depraved I am.

This thought went through my mind.

That's all you got?

Thanks, babe?

You ain't got a trophy or a plaque or something?

Did you not only see this kitchen, but did you smell it?

Why do you tell us that?

Because I don't I don't want to be glib and just say, oh, submit to God's definition of it.

Uh it's not, I mean, there's a lot of jumping off points in there.

One man and one woman, yeah, that's exactly right.

Which is designed to meet the needs of the individuals, which just means not just you, Skippy, not just me.

While reflecting the nature of God.

Ooh, we just gotta do it.

Mark 10, 45, the Bible says, For the Son of Man came not to be served, but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many.

So the Bible tells me, like it does in Ephesians 5, husbands love your wives like Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.

To clean the kitchen is no big deal.

No cookie for me, no trophy, no looking at my wife.

I did something for you.

Now, see, that's what it means for to honor the institution of marriage.

Secondly, uh, as this expression, marriage is a vehicle of acceptable worship.

See, because we're receiving this kingdom that is unshakable.

So let us worship.

So, in response to that, let us worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for God is a consuming fire.

So, secondly, what do we do?

We guard the marriage bed.

That's what Hebrews 13 4 says.

Very clearly, let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled.

For God will judge the sexually immoral and the adulterous.

Now, in these verses, what you have, you have an exhortation followed by a motivation.

Uh, and let me say that again.

You have an exhortation, do this, followed by a motivation.

Here's why.

And if you start with an understanding of what God will do, it informs what you don't do in marriage.

And let me be clear about this God will judge the immoral and the adulterous.

So we don't have to, but we don't have to apologize from saying, because in our country that is so pathetically, politically uh correct, you can't say anything is wrong and sin.

We'll get to that in just a minute, because we've gone from a guilt culture to a shame culture, which is horribly damning to the individual and your psyche.

But anyway, we just keep reinventing stuff, but you say, What do you what do you mean?

Let me be clear about this.

God will judge the Bible says the immoral and the adulteress.

Let me distinguish between the sin of adultery and the life of an adulterer.

Adultery, when the Bible talks about adultery, it's a married person having sexual relations with somebody besides their wife, okay?

That's adultery.

The Bible says that is horrible, it's not good, it's a sin.

Is it forgivable?

Absolutely.

I know people who've done that and have repented, and God's done a deep work of redemption in their life.

That's a sin of adultery.

And then there's their life of the adulterer, so the adulterer.

It's it's the woman that I met who found that I was a preacher, and she kind of very kind of coily said to me, I said, so we got to talking.

I said, Well, tell me about you.

What are you doing here at this event?

This was not a church event.

What did you do here at this event?

It was a wedding.

And she said, and I quote, I like to seduce married men because they have extra income and they don't have all the requirements that a relationship requires.

I can see them when I want to.

And then she looked at me because we don't know how to blush, she looked at me and said, What do you think about that?

Don't ask me questions.

Because I'm not intimidated by your depravity, okay?

Because I'm gonna get up in your business at the wedding reception.

So I'm standing there at the wedding reception around the bistro table, and she just picked up her little glass champion and says, What do you think about that?

And I said, I think unless you repent, you're gonna burn in hell when you die.

Then all of a sudden, their champagne's flying out of people's mouths, and they're all like, What?

And look at me.

I'm not trying to be novel.

That was news to all these people.

They all looked at me like, what kind of a caveman are you?

If you've got a Bible, just turn to the left to the book of 1 Corinthians, chapter 6.

1 Corinthians 6 · chapter mention

So you've got to guard the marriage bed.

That's the exhortation.

And here's the motivation, because God will judge the sexually immoral and the adulterous.

And if you and I, Ezekiel 33 says, if we see the sword coming and we don't speak out to warn people, they're gonna die, but their blood's gonna be on your hands.

You might want to man up, ladybug, and read the Bible, understand what it says in context, and say it with compassion.

And that's as compassionate as I knew to say it.

Don't roll up at me and your little black, swanky.

I'm here to pick up a man's seduce of married man dress and act like you can just announce this, and I'm gonna go, oh, you're such a modern woman.

I'm so intimidated, you're so pretty.

Where did you get all that plastic surgery?

And what man paid for that?

But instead, I just answered her question.

What do you think about that?

I think unless you repent, you're gonna burn in hell when you die.

And by the way, everybody around there they wanted to fight.

They were like, You owe her an apology.

I do not, and I will not.

And I just looked there and I said, I'm not mad at you, I'm not hating on you.

And I reference what the Bible says right here in 1 Corinthians chapter 6, verse 9, or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God?

1 Corinthians 6:9

That's one of the greatest questions the Bible asks, our pathetically unbiblical culture.

And I'm talking about the church, not out there in the world.

Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God?

We don't, because we think we can be righteous on our own.

We on our own are unrighteous.

Adultery and the adulterer, the person, the man or woman that just lives this life and thinks you're getting away with it, you're not getting away with anything.

You will stand before God on judgment day and he will say clearly and plainly, Depart from me, you workers of iniquity.

I never knew you.

Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God?

And then he gives all kinds of examples of what unrighteousness looks like.

For those of you who say, Well, what's up with the gay bashing?

You know, gay bashing.

The Bible's against sin in all its forms.

Let me give you an example.

Do not be deceived, neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.

There's nine manifestations of unrighteousness.

Which one do you want to pick?

See, the Bible's against sin and unrighteousness in all its expressions.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself, gay community.

It's not a civil right, and no one's hating on you.

You will not inherit the kingdom of God just like the adulterer will not.

Verse 11, and such were here, here's the gospel.

Don't stop in verse 10.

Keep going to verse 11.

And such were some of you.

But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

That's the gospel.

That is the gospel, that's the power of the gospel to the sexual immoral, to the idolater, to the adulterer, to the men who practice homosexuality, to the women who practice homosexuality, to the thief, to the greedy, to the drunkard, to the greedy banker on Wall Street who comes up with a mathematical equation calls derivatives and bankrupts our country almost?

Your only hope is the gospel that you could be washed, that you could be sanctified, and you could be justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

Nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers.

And the gospel applies to all of them.

The church at Corinth was full of those kind of people.

Don't you want to be a church that's full of those kind of people?

Hello, is this mic on?

Don't you want to be a church that's just full of people that say, yeah, I used to, I used to be a homosexual, I used to be greedy, I used to be a swindler, I used to extort money from people, I used to go above and beyond what was allowable, voila, just because I wanted a bigger deer lease in South Texas.

See, you if you believe the gospel, that's the kind of people that should be in the church, and they all should be saying, you know what?

I was I was that's who I was, but I was washed, I was sanctified, I was justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

In verse 12, he says, All things are lawful for me, but not all things are helpful.

All things are lawful for me, but I will not be dominated by anything.

Food is meant for the stomach and the stomach for food, and God will destroy both one and the other.

The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.

And God raised the Lord and will raise and will also raise us up by his power.

Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ?

Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute?

Never.

Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her?

For as it is written, the two will become one flesh.

But the one who is joined to the Lord becomes, see, that's back in Genesis when God instituted marriage.

And that becomes the standard by which all sexual relationships are governed and evaluated.

The two become one flesh.

You can't be one flesh with your husband or wife and then join your body to the body of a prostitute and tell yourself it's okay.

Because the Bible says clearly it's not.

Verse 17 But he who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him.

Flee from sexual immorality.

Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.

Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God?

You are not your own.

Stop saying it's my body, it's not.

That is the confession of an unbeliever.

If you say that, what you're you're divorcing yourself from the promise of the gospel.

You're not your own, for you're bought with a price.

So glorify God in your body.

See, one of the ways that we kind of uh see marriage is this is this expression of acceptable worship, is that you guard the marriage bed.

That means you don't just not commit adultery or be immoral.

That means you don't look, you don't expose yourself to pornography.

Because when you do, you're letting this invisible man or woman in your marriage bed, and you've introduced this unrealistic standard into your marriage, and you've defiled the marriage bed.

That's a form of unfaithfulness, men and women.

And I know we live in a culture where men shrug and go, Well, I'm a man.

Okay.

Okay, I I have more respect for the black men in Memphis, Tennessee, back in the 60s, the garbage men who wore t-shirts that said, I am a man.

They had a point.

You don't when you shrug and go, Well, I'm a man.

That explains my pornography addiction.

No, it doesn't.

And I'm not shaming you.

I'm just saying, guard the marriage bed.

Guard the marriage bit.

Why?

Because God will judge the sexually immoral and the adulterous.

We've so succumbed to the world's way of thinking about sin that nobody's guilty anymore.

And here's the listen carefully.

Here's the bad news in a world where no one's guilty.

At least with guilt, you can admit you're wrong.

And that's the gospel.

That's 1 Corinthians 6.

Hey, don't you know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God?

He lists these nine different expressions of unrighteousness.

And then he says, and some of you were, but you were washed, you were justified, you were sanctified in the name of our Lord Jesus.

With guilt, you can say, Hey, you know what?

I'm guilty.

You can repent and be forgiven.

Listen carefully, beloved, in a world where no one's guilty, we just have different definitions, you are left in your shame.

And with shame, there's no clear path to relief.

And so what's happened in our culture is that we've resigned ourselves to managing a feeling that will never go away.

And that's shame.

No one's guilty, but what do you do with the shame?

Third thing that the Bible tells us hey, this is this is what it looks like for marriage to be an expression of acceptable worship.

Just keep your life free from the love of money.

What do you mean?

I'm back in in Hebrews 13.

You still with me?

Hebrews 13, verse 5.

Hebrews 13:5

He says, Keep your life free from the love of money.

Keep your life free from the love of money.

Let me give you a question for a small group tonight.

It's simply this What is your plan for keeping your life free from the love of money?

I have a friend that said to me recently, he said, Man, you're one of the most generous people I know.

And I said, I may have to give away a lot of stuff just to keep myself from loving it too much.

And he says, Man, you I've been to your house.

You don't really live in a nice house.

Thank you.

I think.

Keep your life free.

Again, what is your plan for keeping your life free from the love of money?

Another question to think about how do you know a person loves money too much?

We live in a country where last night, Floyd Mayweather and Manny Pacquiao, they didn't really fight, okay?

They got in a ring and kind of danced around each other for 12 rounds, and then they split, well, all said and done, probably$300 million.

You know what the headline would be today?

Instead of two millionaires got more millions, if one of them after the end of the fight would have said, hey, listen, I'm giving all my proceeds from this fight away.

I've set up a charitable trust, and it's all going to be divided up, and we're going to publish it in the USA today for the sake of financial integrity and accountability.

I do not need any more money.

I've got plenty.

Floyd Mayweather has 100 cars.

And the Bible, I'm not hating, I'm not being a racist.

Don't come up to me and go, Oh, you white man can't say that about a black man.

The Bible, Jesus tells a story about a man who said, you know, my barns are full, I'm gonna tear them down and build bigger barns.

And God comes to him and says, You fool, this night your soul will be required of you.

And then he asks this great question: what profited a man if he gains the whole world and loses and forfeits his own soul?

Have you and your wife ever had a conversation about how much money is enough?

No, no, that's never come up in our house.

Keep your life free from the love of money.

Why does the Bible say that?

Because our natural bent as human beings is towards loving everything but God, the way you're created to love God.

You break the other nine commandments because you break the first commandment, Martin Luther says.

You break the other nine commandments because you have another God before God.

And for many people in our culture, it's money.

And let me just say this unseased money flows to your weakness.

And let me say this aloud and clear.

There's nothing wrong with money.

Okay?

So if you got money and you ain't got to feel guilty, don't just sit there and go, oh great.

I'm not immoral, but I'm pretty financially successful, so go ahead and no, no, no, no guilt coming.

That's not the gospel.

Not at all.

You just have to keep your life free.

Money's not the issue.

The love of money is the issue.

Thinking if I had more money, I would be happier, or I'd feel better about myself, or my husband wouldn't be such a jerk.

I mean, I say to my kids, took them out in my garage when they were little, and I put a hammer and a pair of pliers and a screwdriver in a quarter up on the on my workbench, and I said, What is that?

It's a hammer.

What is that?

It's a screwdriver.

What's that?

It's a pair of pliers.

What's that?

It's a quarter.

No, that's a tool, that's a tool, that's a tool, and that's a tool.

Does dad use this hammer every day?

No, sir.

Put it back.

Does dad use his pliers every day?

No, put it back.

Do I use my screwdriver every day?

No, put it back.

You don't have to use that every day.

You got that?

Madison's like two.

Just look at staring at the quarter.

And when I'm done, I said, Do you understand this, sweetie?

Yes, sir.

Okay, this is just a tool.

You ought to have a toolbox that you put it in and have some in there.

When you need it, go get it.

Use it for what you need to do, and then put the rest back.

You got any questions?

Can I have that quarter?

So you ask either one of my kids today, what is money?

They'll roll their eyes and go, it's a tool, okay?

It's a tool.

I got it.

I got it.

I was two, I got it.

I'm 17.

I got it.

And sometimes I purposely give my 17-year-old too much money to go on some event.

And my wife looks at me like, Are you kidding me?

I'm seeing if she still understands it's a tool.

Or if she comes home with a bunch of just junk.

Oh, my dad gave me$60 and I need 30.

So$30 flows to unseized money, flowed to my weakness.

And glory to God, she always comes back and goes, here I didn't need this.

And I look at my wife and go, now, my youngest will come back with$30 of nonsense.

The retreat was$30, and we stopped at Stuckies, and I bought 17 pecan logs.

I'm like, wow.

You know, you can bring some of this stuff back.

Well, I didn't think about that.

That's what the Bible says.

1 Timothy chapter 6, verses 5 to 10.

1 Timothy 6:5–10

Now there's great gain in godliness with contentment, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world.

But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content.

For those who desire to be rich fall into a temptation, into a snare, and many senseless and harmful desires.

You've got to teach your kids enough about money so that they don't fall into harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction.

For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils.

It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs.

Let me give you another question to think about in your small group.

If we believed nothing in and nothing out, you brought nothing into this world, you can take nothing out.

If we really believe that, how will that change the way we handle money?

Fourth thing the Bible says to us hey, here's practical expressions of how how to see marriage as a vehicle for acceptable worship.

Be content with what you have.

Be content with what you have.

You cannot command contentment.

It's got to be learned.

Let me say this again.

You cannot come, you can't tell people, be content.

You have to learn it.

You say, what do you mean?

Let me read probably the most misquoted verse in the Bible.

In its context, which is crazy.

This is Philippians chapter 4, starting in verse 11.

Philippians 4 · chapter mention

Before we get to verse 13, which says, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, and we just cherry pick that out of the Bible and stick it on our football team, our cheerleading squad, our volleyball team, our dating relationships, our businesses.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

And you are taking that and putting it in a context that it has nothing to do with.

Because we don't want to learn contentment.

That's why.

Why do we do that?

We don't want to learn contentment.

What do you mean?

This is what the Bible says, starting in verse 11 of Philippians chapter 4.

Philippians 4 · chapter mention

Now I am now that I'm speaking of being in need, not that I'm speaking of being in need.

Paul says, I'm not speaking of being in need because I'm not in need right now.

Why?

For I've learned in whatever situation I am to be content.

I know how to be brought low and I know how to abound.

In any and every circumstance, I've learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need.

I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

Now let me say something crazy, because this applies to some of you.

Some of you are so have such a bad theology of money that your biggest nightmare is to have plenty, to abound.

That would feel like selling out to you.

And I'm just here to tell you, that's not the Bible.

It's not the Bible at all.

See, how do you learn contentment?

I say you cannot command contentment, it must be learned.

Here's what I mean: you got to be brought low and you got to know how to abound.

You have to face the situation where you have plenty, and you have to face the situation where you are hungry.

You have to have abundance and you have to have need.

And then Paul says, I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

Paul says, I can be a millionaire to the glory of God.

Some of you are gonna email me about that right there.

Let me say it again.

Paul says, I can be a millionaire to the glory of God.

You know that's possible, right?

Not everybody has money made to deal with the devil.

Hello?

All that is is your jealousy and you're not content in your situation because you're afraid to abound.

But he says, Oh, oh, I can I can be in need.

So this would be a great question for our community groups tonight.

What is the best it's ever been for you guys financially?

And what's the worst it's ever been?

My wife and I laughed because when we first got married, I left that first summer to go speak at my first camp.

We had$2.17 in our checking account.

And our kids look at us now like you all were irresponsible.

It's a good thing we came along and made you adults.

No, we paid all our bills.

My wife looked at me and she goes, Oh, by the way, we have two dollars and seventeen cents left.

Are you getting paid this week?

Unless I make them angry and they send me home early, yeah.

Or unless God says give it away, which sometimes he would.

And my wife smiled and said, Well, if God says give it away, give it away, he'll provide.

And I remember walking into my car to go to the airport thinking, she means that.

But if you ask my wife and I, that was great fun.

A lot of decisions get made for you when you have$2.17 in your checking account.

It's just real easy.

It's just like, hey, you guys want to go to a movie?

We've got other plans.

We didn't say, oh, we got$2.17 in our name.

Feel sorry for us.

No.

We were like, my wife said, I got a gallon of milk in the refrigerator and I got some cereal.

I'm good till you get home.

Dude, we we know what it's like to be hungry.

So you learn contentment because you abound, you're killing it financially, but also you ain't got anything.

That's what Paul means when he says, I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

Here's another question for your small group tonight.

Which one of those, abounding or or struggling, is easier for you?

Which one of those is easier?

I want to end this morning by uh I uh I work hard to be content.

Because uh I like my house until my in-laws come out from Florida for a visit, and my mother-in-law loves to go look at model homes, and then I hate my house.

And so I have to make myself, I have to find things to practice contentment, just to say, hey, you you you you can't do that.

That you just be content with what you have.

And and so this past week, I think we have a picture.

I found this picture.

I heard about this, and and I found this picture.

Uh this happened this past Sunday at the first Methodist Church of Charlotte, North Carolina.

Uh, there was this picture showed up.

This is how you keep your lives free from the money, from the love of money, and this is how you practice contentment.

This is a remember they had offered envelopes?

Remember that?

Some of you are like, we should have some of those.

We do something.

We'll dig them out if you want them.

Uh somebody put this in the offering plate.

Please don't be mad.

I don't have much.

I'm homeless.

God bless.

Tried to tell my kids about this last night at supper.

I don't, I don't shame or guilt my kids.

I just try to give them understanding, and I couldn't make it through without crying.

And I told them, I said, I gotta talk about this so I don't cry tomorrow morning.

In that envelope was a dime, a nickel, and three pennies.

18 cents.

And all of a sudden, my house was real big.

And my back porch was expansive.

And I couldn't walk out and spit on the back fence.

I had rolling acres for a backyard.

Why?

Because there's a homeless person in Charlotte, North Carolina, who put 18 cents in an envelope at a very immaculately beautiful downtown Methodist church in Charlotte, which is a beautiful church.

And said, please don't be mad.

I don't have much.

I'm homeless.

So I just, the way I practiced contentment this week, and this is a question's coming, and we're going to be done, is I started backwards and said, I got a house.

Not homeless.

Okay.

I have more than not much.

Opened my refrigerator this morning, and there was two gallons of milk in there.

Skim and 1%.

Not that there's any difference, but don't tell the women I live with.

Oh, I can't drink skim.

Okay.

I guess this has got more calcium.

Please don't be mad.

And so I sat at my desk this week and stared at that note.

And that little voice said, I've been so good to you.

And I got up.

We have a little shade that we put over our, we have little windows in all our doors, like on the doors over here.

And I put the shade up.

And I cried so hard, I made noise.

I thought, they're gonna think I'm here counseling with somebody.

It's okay.

You know, you try to hold it in, you try to couldn't.

Put my head down on my desk.

And like someone was skinning a Cape Buffalo.

Just little kids come to my office every Sunday.

I caught the Snyder boys in there this morning with a handful of candy.

Thank you.

You're welcome, boys, anytime.

You come anytime.

One little kid stopped this week and said, Pastor Neil's rich.

He has everything in his office.

And I thought about that and I went down again.

And so when I say be content with what you have, let me just say this as a little addendum and we'll be done.

You still with me?

He says, keep your life free from the love of money and be content with what you have, for he, God has said, I will never leave you nor forsake you.

So we can confidently say the Lord is my helper.

I will not fear.

What can man do to me?

Here's a question I want to end with.

When he says, keep your life free from the love of money and be content with what you have, for he has said, I will never leave you nor forsake you.

What if what God is referencing is himself when he says, be content with what you have?

What if God is just not saying, hey, your stuff, your house, your cars, your clothes, your shoes, your yard, whatever?

What if God is saying, Be content with me, because I'll never leave you nor forsake you?

So you can say confidently, the Lord is my helper.

I will not fear.

What can man do to me?

Just what if?

Just what if this morning?

Stand to your feet.

Hold your hands out and speak a blessing over you.

When your father says, be content with what you have, he's talking about himself.

Depart now and live like you understand that, you believe that, and you enjoy that.

In the name of the Father and the Son, the Holy Spirit.

Amen.

Bless you.

You're dismissed.