SUMMER IN THE PSALMS: Psalm 139

Chris McCurley: It's a great day. I hope that you've enjoyed the day. Have you ever seen the movie Mr. Holland's Opus? Great movie, highly recommend it. It's a movie about a guy named Glenn Holland who is a musician, composer, and he's working on his life's masterpiece. But in order to pay rent, he takes a job at the local school teaching music. A job he was very hesitant to take in the first place, but a job that he grows to love. And over 30 years, he teaches music to these kids until the school that he is employed at decides to make some budget cuts. And one of the first things to go is the music department. And so Mr. Holland, who has loved his job for over 30 years, hesitant about it, but has grown to love it, is suddenly now out of a job. And he walks. to his classroom and he peers in and just kind of studies it and surveys it one last time and that's when the football coach, a friend of his, steps into scene and Mr. Holland says this. He says, you work for 30 years because you think that what you do makes a difference. You think it matters to people. But then you wake up one morning and find out, well no, you've made a little error there. You're expendable. You ever feel that way? You ever feel like maybe that? There's no purpose for you that maybe your life doesn't have meaning, that maybe you're just kind of running on a treadmill and you're not getting anywhere. You're really busy, but you're like that hamster that's running on the treadmill. You're not getting anywhere. Maybe you feel that way right now. Maybe you feel that way when you crawl into bed at night, when you're driving down the road. You ever think about your life and where it's heading? Your purpose and how you're living out that purpose. Perhaps you feel overlooked, underappreciated, underpaid, or even unnecessary. There are many versions of Glenn Holland. That's a movie, but it's often real life. How do you replace the pity party with a purposeful pursuit? That's the gist of Psalm 139. David teaches us how to pray when you feel like a nobody, going nowhere. Let's look at it together. Verse one. Lord, you have searched me and known me. You know when I sit down and when I rise up. You discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, behold Lord, you know it all together. You hem me in. behind and before and you lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me. It is high, I cannot attain it. know, filters are a big thing nowadays and many of you here don't know what I'm talking about when I say a filter. Not an oil filter, not an air filter, but selfies, which is a big deal for my kids and younger. When they take a selfie of themselves, they can use a filter now that makes them kind of look like a dog or a puppy or maybe enhances. their face removes all the warts and the moles and the blemishes. David here is saying, there's no filter. Sometimes somebody posting a selfie is feeling rather cute that day. Their hair is nice, they're having a good hair day, they're having a good makeup day, and they put hashtag no filter, meaning nothing here. except me in the raw. And that's what David is doing here. He's pouring out himself. There's no filter here. This is all him. That's what Psalm 139 is all about. No filters. This is David in the raw, which is how God sees all of us. And David is praising God for accepting him as is. The main gist of this Psalm is that nothing, and I mean nothing, escapes God's attention. He knows you inside and out. Literally, he made you. Who could ever know you better than the one who made you? You ever heard of Kintsugi? Kintsugi is a Japanese art form where it takes broken pieces and puts them back together, mainly vases that were once valuable and they're broken. And Kintsugi is the art of putting the pieces back together, usually with lacquer and maybe some gold, silver, or platinum. powder mixed in. And it's not just an art form. It's really kind of a way of life. Kintsugi is about taking something broken and putting it back together and to the Japanese people, the kintsugi is even more beautiful than the original. The brokenness is what makes it beautiful. And this goes against our nature, doesn't it? When something beautiful and valuable breaks, it loses its luster. We can try to glue it back together, but it's only a shell of what it used to be. And it's certainly not valuable or useful as it was before. In some regards, you can see why so many people feel this way and reach this conclusion because we mess up and our messing up has collateral damage a lot of times. It doesn't just affect us, but we affect other people with our sin. And so therefore, those people may shun us or turn away from us or leave us. And then we feel even more. debilitated. but there's beauty in the brokenness. In that God sees every crack, yet he still considers you beautiful and valuable. It doesn't mean that he proves of what you did, but it means that he can put you back together again. Psalm 51 that we talked about a few weeks ago is David's testament to this, right? He certainly knew all about brokenness and being put back together. He lived it, and he found restoration in God. And there are certain items that if they break, The only one who can fix them is the manufacturer. Maybe a car, maybe an appliance, it may be a cell phone, but if it breaks, you gotta take it back to the manufacturer because they're the only ones that know how to fix it. I mean, who knows the product better than the manufacturer? It's the same with us. Who knows us better than the manufacturer? So who's the only one who can put us back together? Who's the only one that can take those broken pieces and piece them back together? And unfortunately, that's the last place that many people wanna turn. The last place they want to turn is to God. Instead, they turn to things that don't restore but maybe numb them or make them feel better in the moment. That maybe help them to get over the pain but only for a moment. Maybe they believe that the manufacturer could never repair them or that he doesn't care about them. But David begins this song with a simple truth and it's this. God knows who you are. That sounds so elementary, but you think about the ramifications of such. He knows your thoughts, your fears, your motives, your frustrations. He knows your past, your present, and your future. He notices what's going on around you and in you. He's pegged you better than even you can. That's rather unnerving, isn't it? We never want anyone to know us fully because we're afraid if they know too much about us that they won't love us, that they won't want to be around us. But actually, What seems terrifying is rather comforting. That God knows you better than you could ever know yourself even, and yet he still wants a relationship with you. Now there's eight different Hebrew words in the opening six verses of this song. And each of these words convey a different layer of knowledge about you. Now combined, they picture God as a detective. Tracking even the most mundane activities that you do, brushing your teeth or combing your hair or whatever, something I don't have to worry about. But God is a detective, he's studying you. Even when you think that you're alone, he is there and he dissects our inner world, discerning what makes us tick. He has penetrated our best foot forward, he has precise knowledge of our hard wiring, and he is fully aware of our next move, our next word, our next thought, and again, that can seem terrifying. but we don't want anyone to ever know everything about us. And yet, what seems terrifying is actually comforting. He knows the worst of you and he still wants the best for you. Though broken, you are beautiful and valuable. Keep reading, verse seven. Where shall I go from your spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence? If I ascend to heaven, you are there. If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there. If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me and your right hand shall hold me. If I say, surely the darkness shall cover me and the light about me be night, even the darkness is not dark to you. The night is bright as the day for darkness is as light with you. What's your first instinct when someone flips the switch, turns the light on and finds out something about you that you wanted to keep in the dark? Well, like a cockroach, you run, right? You run, you scatter. You don't want somebody to know your situation. David stated in verse six, such knowledge is too wonderful for me. It is high, I cannot attain it. In other words, I just can't deal with this. I just can't deal with it. It's too overwhelming. It's out of my reach. When someone has intimate knowledge of you, knowledge that you never wanted revealed, you try to hide. It's as if David is retreating. God knows too much about me. He's not gonna want me. I've got to get out of here. Yet he realizes the juxtaposition that he's in. Because while he wants to run and hide from God, he knows he can't. And he knows that playing a divine game of hide and seek, he's going to lose at. It's like trying to run away from your shadow. Where am I going to go, he says. David's fear of total exposure causes him to pause. and ponder if there is anywhere he can secret himself away and he concludes, rightfully so, that there is no place geographically or spiritually for him to run. But it's not like God is the police chasing after him in their car with the sirens on, running high. It's not like God is pursuing him in that manner so that he can arrest him and throw him in prison. Notice what he writes. If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me and your right hand shall hold me." That's guidance and that's security, right? I've met Christians who felt like their face should appear on one of those wanted posters, kind of like the ones you see in the old westerns. They feel like that, you know, they are the most wanted because of the sin in their life and they feel like God has a wanted poster posted somewhere. God wants you all right. No doubt about that. But not for the reasons that you think. You scripture states repeatedly that we are valuable, that we have worth. You think about the words that are used throughout scripture, beloved, chosen, dearly loved children, a people for God's own possession. You are wanted. Maybe not in the way that you think. Mary Ann Byrd writes that she was born with a cleft palate. She had lopsided teeth. She had garbled speech. And when she started school, she was reminded of the fact that she was different. Kids would ask her, what's wrong with your lip? And she would tell them that she fell. Somehow it sounded more noble to have been involved in an accident. rather than being born this way. But she stepped into Mrs. Leonard's class and things changed for her. Mrs. Leonard was a short, round, funny, bubbly, sparkling lady who always instilled confidence within her students. And Mary Ann Byrd knew that there was a hearing test that they did every year where you'd put your ear to the door, cover the other ear, and Mrs. Leonard would whisper something and you'd have to repeat it back. The sky is blue. What color are your shoes? Those kind of thing. Mary Ann Byrd recalls sticking her ear against the door, covering the other and hearing Ms. Leonard say, I wish you were my daughter. everything changed for Mary Ann that day. Life was different because someone saw her as valuable. Even though her classmates and many in the culture thought of her as broken, Mrs. Leonard saw her as valuable. God knows who you are. You are his. And God knows where you are. You are secure with him. Keep reading. Verse 13. For you formed my inward parts. You knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works. My soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance. In your book were written every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them. For you formed my inward parts, David says. The Hebrew for inward parts there literally translates kidneys. The kidneys are formed in the first 13 weeks of pregnancy. If you have the King James, you'll notice it reads, for thou hast possessed my reigns. Reign, same thing, inward parts. The word used for possessed here in the Hebrew is the word kana. And kana, if you follow it the 84 times that it's mentioned in the Old Testament, You'll find it means to acquire, to buy something, or to own something. God owns us. I mean, He made us, He created us, and He owns us. You are owned by God. He fashioned you, and therefore He possesses you. And the context of this psalm shows us that God owns or possesses the unborn even. So the argument that a woman can do whatever she wants because it's her body and all that, no, it's not true. God owns the woman and he owns the unborn child that is within her as well. He decides whether it lives or dies. You wove me in my mother's womb. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. The unborn child is a work of God. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in secret and skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth. Depths of the earth here is a metaphor for the deepest concealment which would be, in this case, the mother's womb. Your eyes have seen my unformed substance. Unformed substance in the Hebrew is golem. It means embryo. A child is called an embryo in the first eight weeks of development. And in your book were all written the days that were ordained for me when as yet there was not one of them. God is intimately involved in the development of a human being, especially the unborn. Before you were born, He could look upon your life. He could view your lifespan from start to finish. God knows all about you. He knew all about you even before you were born. He had complete knowledge and that knowledge didn't begin after you came into this world. Like he told the prophet Jeremiah, before I formed you in the womb, I knew you. And before you were born, I consecrated you. Not trying to turn this into a sermon on abortion. But David's prayer. certainly clears up any moral questions about the practice, doesn't it? Only an inability to appreciate the uniqueness and the awesomeness of human life permits one to foolishly conclude that there is ever a time when an unborn baby is not really a baby. But David's not talking just about the unborn here. He's talking about all humans and all of life. God is pro-life. He is pro-life from womb to tomb. From womb to tomb, God cares about people because he is the author of life. He is the manufacturer. He cares about his creation. God not only knows who you are, he knows where you are, and he knows what you are. You're his. And excuse my English, but God don't make no junk. Verse 17. How precious to me are your thoughts, O God. How vast is the sum of them. If I would count them, they are more than the sand. I awake and I'm still with you. O that you would slay the wicked, O God. O men of blood, depart from me. They speak against you with malicious intent. Your enemies take your name in vain. Do I not hate those who hate you, O Lord? And do I not loathe those who rise up against you? I hate them with complete hatred. I count them my enemies." Wow, that escalated quickly, didn't it? I mean, why the shift in focus at this point? What's going on here in David's mind and heart? I mean, so much for the love your enemies teaching, right? You know, what I love about David is what I've said throughout these Psalms is he and Asaph, the psalmist, they just vomit it all out there. They just lay it all out on the table before God. Their raw emotions are on display. It doesn't mean that they're correct necessarily of what they're saying. You know, when you study the Bible, not to get too deep in this, but when you study the Bible, you have to discern between what is prescriptive and what is descriptive, right? There are things that are prescriptive in the Bible that are telling you what you need to do. But there's things that are descriptive that you read about that are not things that you need to do. In fact, they're things you don't need to do, but they're there to describe what you don't need to do, for instance. And so David, the other Psalmist, pouring out their heart, doesn't mean that they're They're on point with and they're on the same page with God. But they're showing their raw emotion. And they're they're speaking out to God that. Look, I've had my share of pursuers. I'd love for you to do away with my enemies. We call these impractatory prayers. You probably heard that term and a prectatory prayer is when you call down divine curses. Because of the hatred of your enemies and David is saying if you hate them, I hate them God. What do we do with this? As New Testament Christians reading the Old Testament Psalms, what do we do with this? Well, I think it's still best practice to follow Jesus's example and his teachings in that we are to love our enemies, that we are to leave vengeance in the hands of God, that we are to hope for their redemption, perhaps even pray for their redemption, but remove all bitterness and hatred from our hearts. But this is what I love about David. He just lays it all out on the table. He tells what is in his heart. And think about this. Could it be that David is looking forward? Could it be that he is imagining a day when the anointed, the Messiah would come and establish his kingdom and eventually do away with all evil and all the enemies that were pursuing him and those? that were against God. One thing is for sure, David often called on God to do something about the opposition and God has heard that prayer. He has done something about the oppression and one day it is all gonna play out. So God knows how you are as well. He knows how you're feeling. He knows what you are going through. So give voice to your feelings. David shows us what it looks like to be honest before God. However, honesty is not license for ungodliness. What we're feeling and what we're expressing before God may not be in line with God's standard, and so we should pray, we should always follow up those raw emotions with God, help me to live at the center of your will. Help me to live as you would have me to live. Our prayer should be tempered with a request, and what is that request? Well, look with me. Verse 23. Search me, God, and know my heart. Try me and know my thoughts and see if there be any grievous way in me and lead me in the way everlasting. Many times over I've had conversations with folks that would say, I've never told anyone. And I get it. I mean, there's certain things that we don't ever want to tell anybody because we're afraid of what they might think of us. We're afraid that if word gets out, they will shun us, they will abandon us, they won't want anything to do with us. We have a tendency to hide parts of ourselves from others. There are parts of me that I am reluctant to share with those around me, even though I've moved way past it. I told you before, I have classmates that are shocked that I'm a minister. Really? You're a preacher? They never expected that. That was not on their bingo card. People can change, right? But even though you change, even though you know you're forgiven, it's difficult sometimes to relive those moments that were certainly less than stellar spiritually. He don't want anybody to know about those, but God knows. And David says, search me, God, know my heart, try me and know my thoughts and see if there be any grievous way in me. David has just spent the first 22 verses detailing the fullness of God's knowledge of him. And he readily admits that God knows his actions, his thoughts, his feelings, his past, his present, his future. There is nothing that is hidden from God's sight because God is omnipresent. He is everywhere all the time. And David ends this Psalm. with an invitation, is inviting God in, search me, audit me, examine me, clean me out, investigate every nook and cranny and figure out if there is any unclean way there, and if so, get rid of it. How can David be so confident? Because you gotta be confident to do that, right? How confident you have to be to say, search me, You know, if you are a bookkeeper and you've kept your books meticulously, you invite the IRS to audit. Maybe not invite, but you'd be okay if they said, hey, we're gonna audit you. Okay, that's fine. My books are clean. But David knows that he's not completely clean. He's had sin in his life. He's got some things that, let's say regrettable moments, right? But his confidence is not in himself. His confidence is in God. Because he knows that when God searches him, it's not just to find something wrong so he can turn him into a marshmallow for all eternity. He knows that his searching is so that he can find anything that needs to be cleaned up and do so so that he can have the best, most right relationship with him possible. David isn't displaying confidence in himself, he's displaying confidence in the one that he is inviting in. He knows that God is not looking for a reason to reject him, but he's looking for a reason to accept him. And so what happens if I follow David's lead and ask God to search me, what's the risk there? He knows all about me anyway. He knows every sin that resides in the deepest, darkest recesses of my soul, he can uncover. what wasn't known beforehand and there's nothing he can uncover that can't be forgiven. He searches my heart, not to find a reason to condemn, but to clean up my impurity so that I can be as close to him as possible. Because God knows whose you are as well. So you don't have to fear what he will find. Be confident in the one who already knows you better than anyone could ever know you and still wants you in eternity. I'm gonna give a shameless plug for the podcast this past week. My friend Wes McAdams joined me and we talked about assurance of salvation. Can you know you're saved? And I believe absolutely you can. And one of the things that I mentioned to Wes in our conversation is I feel like there are too many Christians who are living like God is still mad at them. They believe God is still mad at them. And Wes's follow-up was really good. He said, God was never mad at you. He wasn't mad at you. He's mad at sin. He's mad at the sin in your life. which is why he sent his son to pay the tab because you couldn't, because that's how bad he wanted a relationship with you. You don't want a relationship with somebody that you don't love. You don't want a relationship with somebody that maybe you're mad at. You know, if you're mad at them, you want them to grovel, you want them to suffer a little bit, even if you do forgive them eventually. So it's not that God is not still mad at you, he wasn't mad at you. He's mad at sin, he's angry with sin, but he wants a relationship with you. And the sooner we see ourselves as cleansed sinners rather than condemned sinners, the better off we're gonna be. David figured that out. And if he can figure it out and be a man after God's own heart, after all he did, then certainly that breeds hope for us, doesn't it? You ever heard the story, Runaway Bunny? I read this to my granddaughter. Runaway Bunny was written, I think back in the 40s. Anyway, the story, the premise anyway, is about a little bunny that says he's gonna run away from home. And mom says, well if you run away, I will run after you, for you're my little bunny. The bunny says, If you run after me, I will become a fish in a trout stream and I will swim away from you. And Mother Bunny replies, if you become a fish, I will become a fisherman. I will fish for you. So the bunny says, if you become a fisherman, I'll become a rock and I'll place myself high on that mountain. And Mama Bunny says, if you become a rock, I'll climb to where you are. The bunny then says, I will become a bird and fly away from you. But Mother Bunny replies, if you become a bird and fly away, I will become a tree that you come home to. Little bunny says, I will become a little boy and run into a house. Mother bunny says, if you become a boy and run into a house, I will become your mother and catch you in my arms and hug you. And this goes on back and forth several scenarios until the little bunny gives up and says, Shucks, I might as well just stay where I am and be your little bunny. And the mother bunny says, here, have a carrot. can't run from God. Many have tried, and many have learned that it is futile. But why would you want to run anyway? The best place to be is in the Father's house. He knows you better than anyone knows you, even better than you know yourself. And yet, he still wants a relationship with you. Let's pray. God, thank you for another day. Thank you for this opportunity to be together tonight. Thank you so much for giving us peace and comfort even though we know that we are sinful beings. We know that we have disappointed you and yet you clean us up, you put us back together and you love what is broken. You find the beauty in the brokenness. May we do that as well, God. We love you. We thank you for loving us. That's in your son's precious name we pray. Amen. So we're gonna offer an invitation. Before I do, I'd like to read something to you if that's okay. You're my church family. I love this church family and we rejoice with those who rejoice and we weep with those who weep, right? Well, I have reason to rejoice. And I wanna share something with you. This is from Tuesday. My oncologist says, I reviewed the blood tests and agree they are good. Your PSA is decreased from being ultra sensitive minimally detectable to become ultra sensitive undetectable with appropriately suppressed total testosterone levels. This indicates the treatment is going well and you have capital N, capital O, no active prostate cancer. So, yeah, thank you. just as I have a hot flash. So what this means is that everything is working and everything is playing by the rules. The key is gonna be how long can I stay on the medicine and it keep working and keep doing its magic, but you take your wins, right? I know there's a lot of people here and in your circle that are dealing with messes. Whatever that mess looks like, whether it's. Health wise, it's spiritual, marriage, whatever it may be. We all, it seems like, deal with a mess at some point, and maybe you're going through a mess right now. And I just want you to know that I'm here for you, our shepherds are here for you, and we are willing to meet with you and help you any way we can. We have other ministers on staff that are willing to do that as well. We have a wonderful counseling center just right across the street here that we can put you in touch with as well. But don't suffer alone. You know, if you're in a point right now in your life where it's low and you need some lifting up, let us help you, okay? Thank you for being here tonight. We've got a song. If we can pray with you, we can help you tonight for whatever reason, come as we stand and as we sing.