The Gospel and Marriage | Chris Osburn

As we mentioned earlier, we're so thankful and grateful for all

who were able to make it here this morning.

We know there's a lot of illness going around and there's some

that are here they're missing that we see normally that aren't

here because of that. And then there's some that are

traveling as well. So let's keep all those in our

mind in our prayer and we're so thankful that you were able to

make it here this morning. This is not a new lesson I gave

this. It's been, I think about five

years or a little over five years ago when I gave this and

when I when I gave this then and it's the same now.

I do not have anybody specific in mind when giving this lesson.

There's no issues or anything like that.

But I think we desperately need to hear from the word of God

concerning these things. So if that unfortunate moment

comes up that we're going to talk about today, which is

specifically divorce is what we're going to talk about today,

that we are prepared to deal with that based on what the

scriptures teach us. And we need to, we need to, we

need to be prepared, like I said, and be compassionate and,

and understand what Jesus teaches us in the word of God.

We're going to be in Matthew chapter 19 dealing with verses

Matthew 19 · chapter mention

one through 12. And this was actually supposed

to be Frank's week this week, but he and I traded.

So he's going to be teaching next week.

Just in case anybody was kind of curious what was going on with

the teaching schedule as well. So in the, you know, we, we may

think that we not, may not be touched by this subject that

we're going to talk about this morning.

But personally, we may not be touched with this subject.

But those around us, those may be in the church or or out in

the, the world that may come to experience this subject that

we're going to talk about today. We need to be ready for it.

We have a responsibility as Christians on multiple levels as

we are living our Christian life with our, our, if you want to

call it a church family or Philip brothers and sisters, we

have a responsibility. We must care for one another

with concern. This is what it means to be

brothers and sisters. We don't just sit in a service

next to each other, you know, once a week or twice a week or

whatever it may be. That's not what the church is.

The church is more than that. We care for each other.

We look out for each other, we serve and we help each other.

This means when a couple in the church is struggling in marriage

in any way, even maybe contemplating divorce, we don't

isolate them or ignore them during their struggle.

We, we, we care for them as as our our nuclear family would.

We would come close, we would draw near them, we would try to

help them through whatever situation may be coming at them.

Secondly was we must encourage each other with the truth.

We don't just share our thoughts or our opinions on with each

other in, in, in any matter. We share God's, God's word and

what God teaches us and in the context of caring and concerned,

we open up the Bible together, helping each other to see what

God says for us. And everything that God says for

us is for our own good. And we need to understand that.

We need to look at what Jesus says about marriage and divorce.

And we also because we want to be able to encourage one another

with truth and not just with our opinions, not with not with

Chris's opinions or anybody else's opinions.

You know, the church is not based on opinions.

The church is based on truth and that's what we hope to discover

today. And 3rd, as we encourage with

one another, in truth, we must also comfort one another with

love. What we're going to dive into

the next few minutes, it can be a sensitive subject to those

that may be here. I don't know each and

everybody's situation. I don't know to.

I don't claim to know everything about everybody's situation, but

I know it may be opening up maybe some old wounds or some

sore thoughts or or or previous experiences.

It may be a wound from the past, but maybe it's still open wound.

I don't, I don't know. There's so many emotions that

that people have experienced or maybe you're experiencing with

maybe sorrow or loss, disappointment, anger, regret,

guilt, maybe all the above or maybe so much more.

So I hope to be sensitive. Today is my is my goal.

The last thing I want to do is is to make matters worse or make

wounds worse. We want to understand that the

gospel words that are taught here are for our healing and for

comfort. So we need to understand that

moving forward, whatever the subject may be, it doesn't have

to be the subject of divorce and marriage.

It could be any topic that affects us here.

The, the, the gospel is intended to treat every single subject

that comes to us at life. We want to care for our children

who are affected, of course, by marital struggle and divorce in

a way that those children aren't pushed away from the church.

So if there's a situation that's going on, we want to make sure

that those children aren't rejected in any way or, or the

way that the church handles a certain situation to where that

that child is taught incorrectly of how we're supposed to handle

these. We want to make sure that if

there's anything being experienced right now in the

congregation that you know, it's not necessarily it's something

that we're afraid of or ashamed of.

We need to make sure that we understand that the congregation

here is not a congregation that shames people, that it's not the

purpose of the gospel nor nor it's the purpose of us as

members to to shame. We have all sinned we and we've

all been sinned against and none of us are better than each other

in any way. This means when we hurt, we hurt

with those there's those that hurt with us.

We weep with those who weep. And as we love and and Jesus

loves, Romans 12 says rejoice with those who rejoice and weep

with those who weep. This is our responsibility as

Christians, and in light of the responsibility, our lives are to

reflect our reflection of Jesus's love in the world where

marital struggle and divorce are very, very real.

It's very common. And quite frankly, quite

frankly, every single marriage is under attack today.

We need to understand that there is an adversary who wants to

destroy the marriage relationship because it was

created by God and designed by God.

We know that Satan is doing everything he can to attack that

marriage union. The Bible doesn't say ignore the

devil and he will flee from you. It says resist the devil and he

will flee from you in James 47. So Jesus's words for Matthew 19

one through 12, we're going to read that.

It says there beginning in verse one.

Now it came to pass when Jesus had finished these things that

he departed from Galilee and came to to the region of Judea

beyond the Jordan, and great multitudes followed him and he

healed them there. The Pharisees also came to him,

testing him and saying to him, Is it lawful for a man to

divorce his wife for any for just any reason?

And he answered, And he said to them, Have you not read that he

who made them at the beginning made them male and female, and

said, For this reason a man shall leave his father and

mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become

one flesh. So then they are no longer 2,

but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined

together, let not not man separate.

Then they said to him, Why then did Moses command to give a

certificate of divorce and to put her away?

He said to them, Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts,

permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning.

But from the beginning it was not so.

And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for

sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery, and

whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.

His disciples said to him, if such is the case of the man with

his wife, it is better not to marry.

But he said to them, All cannot accept the same, but only those

to whom it has been given. For there are eunuchs who were

born from thus, who were born thus from their mother's womb.

And there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there

are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the

Kingdom of heaven. Heaven's sake, he who is able to

accept it, let him accept it. So I want to consider 3, three

points as we go through this sermon today, and we'll talk

about what Jesus's words mean for our lives.

Truth number one, God created marriage.

It starts with the creation. When asked about marriage and

divorce in verses four and five, Jesus says, have you not read

that He who made them at the beginning made them male and

female? And he said, for this reason a

man shall, shall, shall leave his father and mother be joined

to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.

So the man and the woman are no longer 2, but they're one flesh.

What Jesus is saying here, Jesus takes us all the way back to the

very beginning of the Bible in Genesis one where God created

man and woman and brings them together in this union called

marriage. And if we think about it, you

know, God didn't have to create us in this way as men and women.

He could create it as however he wanted it to.

He didn't have to create marriage in this way, one man

and one woman coming together in one flesh and one union.

But he did. And by doing so, God defines

marriage from the beginning for our good.

And we know that we live in a country that officially denies

this truth. If you want to say civilizations

and millennia have accepted God's, you know, definition of

marriage as an exclusive, permanent union of one man.

We've seen that for for years and years and years and years.

And about 30 years ago, it was reiterated that the definition

of our country across all party lines, that it was called the

Defense of Marriage Act, It was agreed upon that it's a marriage

between a man and a woman. And if we remember, about nine

years ago, the Supreme Court, of course, struck down key

provisions of that act in a way that paved the way for the

redefinition of marriage across the country.

One prominent profession, Christian Church leader, if you

want to say, said in response to this, this is a huge moment when

lots of us are realizing that the old way of seeing things

doesn't work. That was a quote UN quote

Christian who said that. So even even Christian leaders

in the past saying that the old way, the way that God defined

marriage, it's basically antiquated, if you want to say,

and it's appalling. It had, you know, people having

the audacity to come along 1000 years, thousands of years of God

creation defining marriage in the 2000 years after Jesus

reiterated that definition. Then they say in the last, last

nine years, OK, yeah, that's, that's not the way it should be.

We're going to redefine our marriage here.

It's appalling to say to say that from the beginning of

creation God has defined marriage for our good.

So we need to trust and submit to his word and see the beauty

of God's definition of marriage. One man, one woman, both

masterfully moulded by the Creator in the image of their

Maker, with equal dignity and complementary roles coming

together to form 1 flesh. You know, we don't need to look

to a court, we don't need to look to the government's to

define marriage for us. We have the word of God that is

very clear on what marriage is and how we should go about it.

God has also designed marriage intentionally.

God's design of marriage is for the display of the gospel.

This is on another level that we can think about this God's

design of marriage is the unit between one man and one month.

One woman is not random. God is not random in His ways.

God is not reckless in His ways. God knows exactly what He's

doing all the time and we need to understand that everything

that He has done currently does or will do in the future is not

random. When God made man and the and

woman and brought them together a marriage, he wasn't just kind

of, you know, just rolling the dice and hoping that this was

going to work. And you know, that's not what

God's, that's not what God does. God does this intentionally.

He was painting a picture. And it's so important for us to

understand, you know, some people view marriage merely as a

means of self fulfillment, if you want to say, or self

satisfaction. And our aim is to find a mate

who completes us. And if we just have this view

of, of marriage just as that, that's very limited.

That's a very limited view of marriage.

And it, it could be lead to some very poor, poor results.

The Bible teaches differently, though.

The Bible teaches that God designed marriage not as an end,

but as a means to an end. God designed marriage to be a

picture that points to something greater.

If you want to say we see in Ephesians 3, Ephesians 531 and

32, Paul quotes from Genesis 2 just like Jesus does.

He says for this reason a man shall leave his father and

mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become

one flesh. And then he says this in verse

32. He says this is a great mystery,

but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

The purpose of marriage is to point us to Christ.

That is the purpose of it. We want to follow the logic here

that's given to us. Marriage is a picture of Christ

and and the Church on the camets of this earthly world.

Ephesians 525 says Husbands love your wives, just as Christ also

loved the church and gave himself for.

So a husband is designed by God to be a picture to the world of

Christ's love for the church, selfless sacrificial love.

And Ephesians 524 says, Ephesians 5.

I missed something here. Ephesians 524 says, therefore,

just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wise be to

their own husbands and everything a wife is designed by

God to be a picture to the world of the church's love for Christ,

a joyful, submissive love, if you want to say.

And when this happens in marriage, the world will

absolutely see a picture of the gospel.

And when we use the word gospel, we want to understand what the

gospel is. Of course, the gospel has been

is the good news that every one of us has been created by God

for relationship with God, the one true king forever.

But we have sinned against God not just in our understanding of

marriage sometimes, but in so many other ways.

We have turned from God to all kinds of sinful acts.

If you want to say we have rebelled against God and that

has deserved separation from God in our sin, But the good news is

that God loves us and he's not left us alone.

Of course, in that separation God came to us in the person of

Jesus. He is the long-awaited king in

the flesh who came to live on a perfect life and a powerful life

with no sin. And he laid down his life to pay

the price for our sin, that Jesus died on the cross to pay

the penalty for our sin against God the Father.

And the good news, of course, keeps getting better.

We know that Jesus didn't stay dead for very long.

Three days later he rose from the grave in victory over sin

and death. So that anyone anywhere who

obeys the gospel of Jesus will be forgiven of the sin that and

and brought back into a relationship with God as long as

we remain faithful to him. So to be a follower of Jesus

means that we renounce all of the gods and idols of our life

and believe that Jesus is the Son of God and be baptized for

the remissions of sins. We need to understand that God

loves us and God desires a relationship with us.

God has made it possible through Jesus to do so and when we do,

we realize that this ultimate meaning of marriage to show the

picture of the to the world. Marriage and mission are

connected because God is a design marriage for display of

the gospel. So we need to show his love to

the world through our marriages. The husband should love his wife

by laying down his life to love her, to lift her up with honor

and dignity and beauty. And we gladly submit to follow

Jesus, not because we have to because we because we love

Jesus. You know, if any husband was to

just do the things a husband ought to do because he felt they

have to, you know, he's going to get a lot of Flack from his

wife. I believe we.

I have to tell you I love you. I forgot to tell you I love you,

OK? I love you.

I have to do this, OK? It doesn't work out that way.

We know that we do things in our marriage because we love the

other one, the other spouse. That's how it's pointed to us.

You know, have we ever met a wife who didn't want to follow a

husband who selflessly and sacrificially loved her?

You know, this is how the picture.

This is this is how the picture should be shown to the world.

We as husbands, we need to realize that What's at stake,

we're representing Jesus to a watching world with the way that

we love our wives. So when we put that into

perspective, when we understand it kind of changes how we go

about our lives on a daily basis.

Husbands, if we are harsh with our wives, we will show the

world that Jesus is harsh with his people.

If we ignore our wives needs, we're telling the world that

Jesus ignores our needs. If we are unfaithful to our

wives, we are showing that the Jesus is unfaithful to us.

So we need to ask ourselves the question, what picture of Jesus

are we giving to the world with the way that we love our wives?

Similarly, wives, what picture are you giving to the world of

what it means to follow Jesus? If we just, if you disrespect

your husband, you're showing the world that Jesus is not worthy

of respect. If you do not pursue your

husband, you show the world that Jesus is not worth pursuing.

If you're unfaithful to your husband, you show the world that

Jesus is not satisfying enough for His people.

God has designed marriage for the display of the gospel, so

let's show His love to the world.

Marriage by God's definition and design is very, very important

for us to understand. This is why Jesus says what He

does in verse 6 of Matthew 19. It says therefore what God has

joined together. Let not man separate truth #2 we

want to make point of here is that God hates divorce, God

hates divorce, God created marriage, and God hates divorce.

And we're using language here that we can read in Malachi 216.

It says therefore the Lord God of Israel says that he hates

divorce, for it covers 1's garments, one's garments with

violence, says the Lord of hosts.

It makes sense to us if we think about it.

You know, if God created marriage to be the union of one

man and one woman for our good and for the display of the

gospel, then divorce fundamentally is at odds with

the definition and design because it's going against what

God designed. It's separate, making that

separation. This and this leads to the

question these Pharisees were asking Jesus about Moses and the

law of the Old Testament. The whole conversation starts

when these teachers of the law ask is it lawful for a man to

divorce one's wife for just any reason?

We see that in verse 3 of Matthew 919 and Jesus answers by

pointing to God's definition of divorce and marriage.

And then in verse 7, the Pharisees point to allowances

for divorce way back in the Old Testament where it says in

Deuteronomy 24, Moses gave instructions for certificates of

divorce. But that's when Jesus says, of

course, we see in verse 8, Moses, because of the hardness

of your heart, permitted you to divorce your wives.

But from the beginning it was not so.

In other words, divorce was not definitively God's design to

begin with. Divorce is always a result of

sin. If there was no sin in the

world, no hardness of heart, there would be no divorce.

But there is sin. We understand that.

We know that marriage is a uniting of two sinners.

When we think about it, we're all sinners.

So you have two sinners coming together in marriage.

And people wonder why so many marriages struggle.

Experts point out all kinds of problems that hinder marital

happiness. Communication problems,

compatibility problems, financial, financial problems,

sexual problems, personality problems.

You know, there's all kinds of problems.

We see them all the time. And every single situation is

unique to its own and, and we don't want to be over simplistic

here, but but the majority of problem with every single

marriage according to Scripture is clear.

The major problem in every marriage is sin.

The big problem in marriage that every husband and wife in this

church is that we are sinners. It's simple and basic, but I

think we tend to overlook it. We're imperfect people and

things happen. We go through, we can go to all

kinds of books, conferences, seminars, experts on marriage,

as long as we try externally to make things work.

If the, if the sin problem is not continually addressed in

each of our hearts and we are putting band aids on broken

limbs, you know, just the we need, we need to understand that

sin is the root of the problem with failures in marriages.

That's what Jesus is saying here.

The last place we want to look to when it comes to problems in

our marriages, of course, is within ourselves.

Jesus calls it for what it is, and it's sin.

It's the hardness of our heart that ultimately leads to divorce

and almost any marital conflict. There's obviously two sides to

the story. You know, while there are many

situations when there are more fault, fault clearly lies on one

side other than the other. The fact still remains that both

are sinners, and any divorce is a result of sin.

And this is true in two particular ways.

First, God hates divorce, and there are only a couple

exceptions where He allows it, and we'll talk about those in a

minute. But outside of these exceptions,

divorce in and of itself is a sin against God.

And it's critical for us to hear it in the culture that we Live

Today in the country that we Live Today, where the ability to

divorce is so easy. And that's all that's needed is,

is merely a statement of, you know, a simple irreconcilable

differences. And that's enough for a divorce

to happen in the state or in the country.

And while, you know, I was putting this together back a few

years ago, you can, you can go download an app, pay some money,

push a button, and that starts the process.

It's too easy. Our culture has made it too easy

to go down the road of divorce. And This is why we desperately

need to stop and ask, when does God allow divorce?

And yes, he does. God allows it.

Then secondly, even when God allows divorce, we must be aware

that of course, going through a divorce, there's a temptation to

sin while pursuing divorce, even on biblical grounds, it's

particularly strong. We could think about it.

It's very hard to go through a divorce process, even for

biblical reasons without sinning.

For example, your spouse may have committed adultery against

you. I don't presume to know the, the

hurt or the depth sense of betrayal, the emotions and, and,

and how that can turn somebody to maybe have some malicious

speech against somebody else during that period of time.

You know, the devil looks for every single opportunity he can

to take us away from God's design and what God wants us to

do. We need to make sure that we

guard against ourselves, guard ourselves against those

temptations. It's hard to do and I would

think it's actually impossible to do without Jesus.

But we need to understand that that because of sin in the

world, God designed means of divorce for a reason, so he can

walk with us through those times.

And we're very thankful for that.

He knows how it feels, and He wants to help us avoid

responding to sin with sin. Divorce is often sinful in many

ways. Truth #3 God regulates divorce.

So when is divorce non sinful not sinful?

When does God allow as a result of sin and and and the world and

the hardest of our hearts. Jesus teaches us that that God

regulates divorce and we see that here.

This means that although divorce was not part of God's design for

marriage, passages like Deuteronomy 24, which is, which

is referenced again in Matthew 19 and 1st Corinthians 7, it

makes it clear that the Bible acknowledges that there is a

reality of divorce that needs to be dealt with sometimes.

And these are not, these are regulations.

These are not suggestions. If you want to say this is not

giving God, giving us truths that are open to be added to or

taken away from by any congregation, teachers,

evangelist, counselors, lawyers, whatever you want to say.

These are not suggestions with things that can be added or

taken away. These are hardline regulations

that God gives us. God gives us in the Scripture to

potential reasons biblical grounds for divert for divorce,

one here in Matthew 19 and the other in First Corinthians 7,

Matthew 19, the grounds for divorce.

We see here we have this conversation between Jesus and

the Pharisees who are trying to trap Jesus.

It tells us that they were they were trying to trap them into

something by using a quote from Deuteronomy 24 in the Old

Testament. There were different schools of

thought in the 1st century Judaism about what might be

allowed for divorce. One school of thought believed

that a man could divorce his wife is she had committed any

type of immodest behavioral or sexual immorality.

The other school of thought, which was more dominant,

interpreted Deuteronomy 24 in a much more broader way, saying

that divorce was possible whenever a wife did anything

that displeased her husband. Then America divorce his wife.

This led to men basically divorcing their wife for just

about any reason that would that could have been what the

Pharisees were thinking when Jesus said to them, I say to

you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality and

marries another, commits adultery.

So in Matthew 19, Jesus put one ground for divorce on the table,

and that is adultery. There's some debate even about

what that means because of the world, because the word for

sexual, sexual immorality that Jesus uses here is the word

pornea, which is a word that refers to all kinds of sexual

sin in the Bible. But in the context of the

passage that we're reading here today, Jesus has referred to

this as one flesh union of marriage.

And the picture seems to be of a spouse who violates that one

flesh union. And that is a serious violation.

That is a direct violation not only against the spouse, but

against God. And this exception makes sense

in the light of what Jesus has already explained when it comes

to the one flesh meaning of marriage.

Adultery in defiance of God places another person within

that union of one man and one woman.

Adultery demeans adultery shames and abandons a husband or a wife

for selfish gain and such sexual immorality.

Jesus says it is extremely serious and it is grounds for

divorce. We see stern warnings throughout

Scripture against it. There may be some here today who

in our mind have maybe a flirted with adultery, thought about

adultery, stepped an inch toward adultery or may even be on the

verge of adultery. And yes, that includes for not

viewing pornography. If adultery is anywhere near you

right now, even in the recesses of your mind in a way that have

you've tried to cover up in some way.

I want to read Proverbs 7. It describes a man wandering

after a woman who was not his wife.

Says this in Proverbs 7, starting in verse 21.

With her enticing speech she has caused him to yield.

With her flattering lips she seduced him.

Immediately he went after her. As an ox goes to the slaughter,

or as a fool to the correction of the stocks, till an arrow

struck his liver as a bird. As a bird hastens to the snare,

he did not know it would cost his life.

Now therefore listen to me, my children, pay attention to the

words of my mouth. Do not let your heart turn aside

to her ways. Do not stray into her paths, for

He is. She has cast down many wounded,

and all who were slain by her were strong men.

Her house is the way to hell, descending to the chambers of

death. Do we hear what God is saying

about adultery? And if you find yourself

flirting with that, we need to absolutely turn the other way

and run, run away from what is in front of us.

We're like a cow going to the slaughter.

It says when we're toying with adultery, Proverbs 3 or 632 says

whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding.

He does. He who does so destroys his own

stole soul. I mean, do we realize how stupid

and dumb we are when we're flirting with that?

It it, it's, it's like we're walking to our own death,

convincing ourselves that it's that it's good and we need to

run away from that. And this is the word of God.

It's being very gracious of teaching us how to deal with

this. We don't want to rationalize

with it. We need to run from it.

We don't want to flirt, flirt with it.

We want to flee from it. And in back in Matthew 19, we

noticed that Jesus does not say when adultery occurs that

divorce is certainly required, certain or required.

Instead, Jesus says divorce is permittable in that situation.

The goal here is, or I should say, the Pharisees were

searching for circumstances which it would be possible for

them to divorce. And Jesus is saying here that in

his response that we're not looking for reasons for for

divorce, we're longing for reconciliation to occur.

The goal here is not to look for the letter of the law, for a

loophole that allows divorce. That's not how we should look at

God's Word. Jesus and God, of course we see

hate divorce, so we should do all we can to keep that union

together. And his teaching in Matthew 19

comes right after right on the heels of the parable of the

unforgiving servant, if that makes any sense.

I don't think it's a coincidence.

Matthew 18 Jesus taught his disciples to forgive

extravagantly. And the implication I think is

pretty clear. We work towards reconciliation,

pray towards redemption and restoration, not because it's

easy, but because that is the heart of the gospel.

Redemption is the heart of the gospel.

It's not to make not to shame anyone or to make anyone who

feel guilty who divorces after adultery.

Jesus makes it clear here that that exception, exception is OK.

He says the same thing in Matthew 5 S Divorce is possible

after adultery, but it's not inevitable.

So how can marriage survive, survive adultery?

And the answer, I think is only by the power of the gospel.

I think only when we have Jesus on our side is that possible.

Forgiveness is only possible by the love of Christ and true

repentance. This is the love of Christ on

the cross, and this is the Christ who lives inside of us.

And we want to be. I want to be careful even here.

You know, there's so many different circumstances and so

many different lives. There are circumstances.

One spouse may commit adultery once and realize that their sin

before God and and their spouse. They confess their sin, they

hate it, they turn away from it, they make changes from it humbly

and they do everything necessary to restore that relationship

with the other spouse. We've seen that happen.

There are circumstances when a spouse is perpetually adulterous

or or sorry just because they got caught or is not turning

away from their sin and is not working to restore that trust.

When it comes to adultery, divorce is possible but is not

inevitable. Even though we're in Matthew 19.

I want to point put on the another point here, another

reason for divorce. The Bible teaches that in in

first Corinthians Chapter 7 and before we get into that I want

1 Corinthians 7 · chapter mention

to clarify something First Corinthians 7 is not a patches

that we can use for grounds for divorce.

My understanding this is a passage dealing with a believing

spouse and an unbelieving spouse.

This is not dealing with two believing spouses.

It's not dealing with two Christians dealing with an

unbelieving Christian and a believing Christian.

There is no adultery present. They're the only biblical

grounds we have for divorce is what was described in Matthew

19. And this passage is stating that

if one of the spouses is an unbeliever and chooses to leave

the believing spouse, the believing spouse is free from

the divorce bondage. We cannot divorce based on the

fact that our spouse is an unbeliever.

If that unbelieving spouse chooses to leave, then that's

when we have that exception. Another circumstance where

divorce is allowed in, in First Corinthians 712 through 14 is

abandonment. It says in verse 12 of First

Corinthians 7, if any brother has a wife who does not believe

and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her.

And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is

willing to live with her, let her not divorce him.

For the unbelieving husband is sanctified, which is made holy

by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the

husband. We don't have time, of course,

to dive into all that. This passes me, but the bottom

line is that the believing spouse should not initiate

divorce from an unbelieving spouse.

That's the bottom line. But they should stay married,

working, praying, loving toward it that unbelieving spouse for

their salvation. But Paul continues to say in

verse 15, but if the unbeliever departs, let him depart.

A brother or sister is not under bondage in such cases.

In other words, if an unbelieving spouse chooses to

abandon a believing spouse Despite that believing spouse

love for them, then divorce is preferable in that situation.

That's what the Bible teaches us.

In other words, if we don't initiate that kind of abort of

divorce, but if it's forced upon you by abandonment from an

unbelieving spouse, it says to let him depart.

That's clearly what's taught in God's Word and here in the

Bible. We have two reasons where

divorce may occur, adultery and abandonment, and that's it.

If we have a spouse that commits adultery against this, or if an

unbelieving spouse leaves a believing spouse, those are the

only two reasons. From my understanding, any

divorce outside of these reasons taught by God's Word leads to

adultery and remarriage. There's so much more that we

could get into with these two ideas.

We don't have time. Of course, that's a topic for

another sermon or lesson. So practically speaking, the

mean that means that the non adulterous spouse in the first

exception for divorce can remarry according to these

passages. But outside of this a man or

woman is not free to remarry. Such remarriage would result in

adultery. Before we move on, I want to

briefly address one other thing that is not mentioned here

specifically but is defined definitely a mention in the

Bible and that is abuse in marriage.

We don't have time to to dive deep into all the aspects of

marriage and things that could and can't go on in a marriage

relationship, but the Bible makes it clear that any type of

abuse in marriage is an absolute sin period.

Where there be physical or verbal, any type of abuse is

specifically written against in the scriptures and is

intolerable in marriage. No spouse or child should be in

a home with someone who jeopardizes their safety.

We as a congregation, if there's any spouse in any type of that

situation, we pray that you would come to one of the one of

us so we can help in any way. I don't know if there is, but we

also, we always want to just say things like that.

So we know that we're here to help in whatever it may be.

We help each other. That's what we talked about

earlier. There are so many different

circumstances, but through law enforcement when it's necessary

as well as church discipline according to the Bible, we must

take abuse seriously when we just talk with each other and

God's Word with God's Word through how abuse effects

marriage and potentially divorce without diving, you know in more

depth there. When a spouse continues in

abuse, it becomes clear that that spouse is not actually a

follower of Christ if they continue in that sin, which may

show a picture of an abandonment that we saw in First Corinthians

7. God created marriage, God create

hates divorce, and God regulates divorce.

The reason that God is so serious in His word about how

marriage covenants with each other is is is is is so

important is because God is so serious about his marriage and

his covenant with us, with his church.

If we have gone or if you've gone through difficulties in

marriage for a variety of reasons, we need to know that as

a follower of Christ, as a part of the bride of Christ, men and

women, his bride, the body, the church.

Whether we're offended by a spouse or even if or if our

spouse offends us, for you offend our spouse.

If we have sinned, we can of course find that hope in Jesus

for reconciliation. Jesus has paved the way for us

to be forgiven of our sins. Even if the marriage covenant

was broken in the past because of your sin or your spouse's

sin, we need to know that the the ultimate marriage covenant

is still firmly intact. And when I say that, that is the

picture that our physical marriage points to, which is the

marriage of Christ in the church, that marriage will never

be separated ever. Jesus will never commit adultery

against us. He will never abandoned you.

No matter what happens, Jesus will never forsake his bride,

ever. And as as Christians, that

really is a reality to us to to us here in this building.

We are His bride and we can count on His love forever, and

that is the gospel. So what does that mean for our

lives? Know that there are all kinds of

different circumstances. I want to kind of wrap it up

with just a few general expectations that we see in

God's Word. If you are single, a brother or

sister, maximizing your singleness, we want to make sure

that you maximize that for the advance of the gospel.

It's interesting that at both Matthew 19 and 1st Corinthians

7, we see Jesus and Paul commanding singleness for the

spread of the Kingdom of God. Jesus says in verse 11 and 12

here that singleness for the sake of the Kingdom is a good

thing. Not it's not that marriage is

bad, but marriage is not best for all people.

And this is significant to hear because we sometimes have the

idea that we need to be married in order to live a complete,

full life, life for God. But that's not true.

Jesus was the most complete man we know of, the most fully human

person that we know of who was not married.

So if you're single, use it for the glory of God and use it to

pursue the spread of the gospel. Use the takeaways that we can

see in Matthew 19 to maximize that for the Kingdom of God.

If we are married, love your spouse in a way that it portrays

the gospel. Let God's Word drive us, husband

and wife, to love your spouse well today, this week, this

month, whatever it may be. Love your wives with a

sacrificial love #3 take responsibility for the glory of

Christ in our marriages. Wives, respect your husbands and

honor Christ through gracious support of his leadership in a

way that shows the world the picture of the gospel there.

I'm sure we we know of wives and husbands that could potentially

feel neglected, disrespected, uncared for, unloved, maybe

lonely some we could fill in the blank with any type of

description that we want to. We're looking at marriages

thinking and surely God didn't design it that way.

You look at those two that man live.

I don't want any part of that. There's so many things that we

can we can think about and yes, God has designed it better than

that. What we see sometimes we want to

encourage ourselves to keep our eyes fixed on him, the only one

who completely satisfy our soul draw.

We want to draw near to Jesus, seek help from the Scriptures

and, and and pray, read the word of God.

And of course, like we mentioned before, having fellowship with

one another is huge. Reaching out to a brother or

sister that when you're down and out if you want to say and and

asking for help is what we're supposed to be doing if we ever

find ourselves considering divorce.

Remember the preciousness and the power of Jesus love.

If we ever start considering divorce, we need to 1st ask

ourselves if we have biblical grounds to do so #1 if we don't,

we need to consider how, in the context of our marriage and with

the help of brothers and sisters, how that conflict can

be resolved. Then, if there is biblical

grounds for divorce, we still need to consider the

preciousness and the power of the gospel with a view towards

reconciliation in marriage. If that's possible.

It may not be possible. It's only with the power of the

gospel that it can change our lives and redeem most marriages.

If you're divorced for a biblical reason and single, we

can of course rest in Jesus's support in that just because you

get divorced under biblical grounds doesn't mean that you

have to remarry. We use that time as being single

as like we said before, driving for, for the spread of the

gospel, working towards doing all you can for God in his plan.

There's so many different circumstances like we mentioned

before, and, and I don't want to be so general, you know, So what

if this, what if that, what if, what if this happens?

Well, this and that, you know, you could get into some pretty

deep weeds and have a hard time working out of things sometime

We don't know. I don't claim to know that

they're all is there's no on this subject, but I hope we just

gain a fuller knowledge of the Bible considering this.

So parents, it's important to teach our children about the

good news of the gospel and also on the flip side, the eternal

consequences of sin. So when we're raising our

children, we we, we, we teach them that, you know, this is

what God has designed, a marriage between a man and a

woman. Any sexual activity outside of

that is sinful, period. Cut and dry.

People can say, well, yeah, this, you know, we can't twist

the word of God to help us in our situation, but teach our

kids, teach them moving forward what it takes to be a faithful

husband and faithful wife and a Christian projecting and and

showing a picture of the gospel, the marriage between Christ and

the church. It's such a beautiful picture.

A poem said something this morning that has benefited the

congregation here in some way. Of course, we must come to

Christ by hearing the word of God, believing the word of of

God, believing that Jesus is the Son of God, confessing his name,

turning away from our old way of life, going in a different

direction. Now we're going to live for

Jesus, live, live for God. And we've been we are baptized

for the remission of our sins and they were baptized into

Christ by the the immersion of water.

Maybe we've done this. We've slipped in our

faithfulness to God. Maybe we need to make a public

confession in some way or just needs the prayers of the

congregation. We ask you to come while we

stand, while we sing.