It Just Doesn't Add Up - 7-11-26

Greeneville Seventh-day Adventist Church: We had so much to learn. So much. We arrived in Kenya during Maxwell Adventist Academy's spring break. It's an interesting time to start work during spring break. The kids are already used to certain people and then new people show up and take over. The students would arrive a few days later and my wife started being the girl's dean, a job she had never done. And school nurse. She had been a nurse, but not in a situation like this. I started teaching a job I had never done. And school pastor. I had been a pastor. but not in a situation like this. Then a few weeks later, the situation all changed. Graduation happened. All the students went home and all the faculty went on leave, except us. We had not been there long enough to go on leave. So we were given new jobs that we had never done. Susan became the school clerk. the registrar, and she had to send out transcripts and make arrangements for new students to arrive and many other tasks. I became the school principal. The only experience I've had with a principal was being sent to his office. And I had to make sure everything ran well for the whole summer. Dealing with Kenyan officials, dealing with division officials, and making sure that the 45 workers on campus actually worked. Another man was hired to help run the maintenance crew. I also had to pay those 45 workers. So I also became the school treasurer. Another job I had never done. I don't even like math. And I had to learn where the bank was and how to deal with Kenyan bankers and how to go to the bank. Make sure every time you go, you go at a different time so nobody sees a pattern and can rob you. bankers were generally very helpful. The bank was in a modern enough building, but when you have to walk past guards who are carrying AK-47s, you realize that you're in a different kind of place. Kicking goats off the step also helped you realize you were in a different kind of place. and walking past dozens of people that were standing in line to talk to the bankers, all staring at the obvious foreigner who was carrying a satchel past them into a special room for Big Shot customers. I guess that's what I was now, as I represented a whole school. That was uncomfortable, watching them glare at you as you walked past all the long lines. straight into a room where they would help you immediately. And then leaving that room, now carrying a bulging satchel. That's scary. Carrying so many shillings, I didn't know how to count. I'm carrying the payroll for 45 workers. And I was then glad for the armed guards, but not the goats. And then driving that money home wondering who knew I had just been to the bank. And my first trip back, going through town, some guy was riding my bumper and then he whipped around me and pulled right in front of me and stopped. I'm like, uh-oh, I'm being robbed. But no, he was waiting for a bus to move a little bit, because then he saw a spot he wanted to park in. Scared me to death. I was mad at him for scaring me to death. I don't like to be scared. And then, The bus pulled up, he parked, I started to go around and the bus went out of gear and backed right into him. I'm like, uh-huh, that'll show ya. Getting those thousands upon thousands of Kenyan shillings into the school safe was such a relief. Speaking of Kenyan shillings, I now have to pay the workers. Like I said, I was no treasurer. Math and I don't get along. I meet people that say, yeah, just give me some numbers and I can crunch them. I'm like, yeah, you can have all the numbers you want. I don't want anything to do with them. I was not in my comfort zone at all. Paying people using cash I didn't yet understand. I didn't understand. What's a shilling? How much is this worth? What's the exchange rate now? It was mind boggling to me. And then trying to make the books at the end of the day add up. I don't even like my own checkbook. ⁓ checkbook, boys and girls. You don't know what those are. I don't like those things. But to have to add up at the end of the day all the transactions I had made with all the workers, it never added up. I was always two or three shillings off, which is not much, but it's off and it boggled my mind and I'd go through it over and over and like it just doesn't add up until I finally said I'm done with this. I reach in my own pocket and put my three shillings in there. Now it adds up. It's fixed. The real treasurer came back from his leave, looked over the books. He didn't see me see him, but I saw him kind of go, but he was very gracious, never said a word and cleaned up my mess. Sounds kind of like God to me. Okay, just let me clean up your mess. The teachings of Jesus just didn't add up either, not for his disciples. Everything was different than they knew. Everything. just didn't add up right. In this fourth teaching discourse of Jesus that Pastor Dawson started talking about last Sabbath, Jesus is showing that the personal relationships of Christians, what they should look like. People who are part of his kingdom now and ready for the kingdom to come live in a humility before each other. You know, we had foot washing a couple weeks ago. symbolic of the humility that we are to live in front of each other, before each other, with each other. Last Sabbath, Pastor Dawson spoke on Matthew 18 about forgiveness that was beyond imagination, about how to deal with conflict between members, how to keep it as private as possible. A while back, a long while back, A friend of mine who was in a rather high position did something very horrible involving his marriage. In fact, he developed a relationship with an online girlfriend that didn't really exist. blew his marriage, blew his career. He didn't seem to care. This was more important to him. He did so many things. His poor children, his poor wife, it led to divorce, it led to sadness, it led to grief. But that wasn't the only problem. Another friend of mine showed him his faults. You know, there's a time and place to do that. And the place is not on Facebook. That's where this happened. Social media is gossip on steroids. He wrote a long Facebook letter, a scathing letter describing how horrible the other person had acted. He listed details. And every single thing my other friends said was absolute truth. But you can be right and be wrong at the same time. He had the facts right, but his approach was wrong. He made public a matter that should have been kept as private as possible. Kind of reminds me of... Nathan approaching David. ⁓ David, let me tell you a story. One time I had two members of my church who were involved in an affair. No, it was not here. And what was going on, this couple, they were having struggles. And if you knew the people, you'd say, yep, they're having struggles. They should have seen that coming. Well, the wife had an affair with another member of my church who was single. I'm like, ⁓ thanks a lot. This is the last thing I wanna deal with. But we followed the counsel of Jesus in that church on Matthew 18, which you heard about last week. And we went to them and we worked with them just as the Bible says, and the woman was humble and sorry and sought forgiveness and received it from God and from her church. Not the husband, but from the church. The man that was involved in the affair was arrogant and not sorry. What's the big deal, he said? Their marriage was in trouble anyway. I wasn't hurting anything. He bragged about it. He could no longer be a member of that church without hurting its reputation. He was not sorry for his sins. In fact, he was rather proud of them. But he was still welcome to attend in the hopes of a conversion experience. The divorce got quite nasty. And the man of the couple, his attorney called me. He says, I need you to come and testify in court about this couple. I said, I will not, I'm their pastor. I do not have to testify in court about them. It's privileged information. He says, you'll testify if I subpoena you. I said, oh, please do. You would love to hear what I have to say about your client. Click. Never heard from him again. I met a man recently in a different town, but recently within two weeks. And suddenly I knew his life story. And he kept mentioning, yep, I've been divorced four times. And after just knowing him and communicating him for two days. I said, why did anybody marry you to begin with? Because I could tell within two days that he was a manipulator, like crazy. And I was like, wow, I don't know. Boys and girls, when you start dating somebody, date longer than two days and you'll know more about them. If you're paying attention, more like two years, four years. Find out who they are. Who's not paying attention to this? he seemed to be, yep, been married four times and divorced four times. I'm like, mm-hmm. Sin is not something to be proud of. A church is made up 100 % of sinners. Okay? 100%. If one of you thinks you're not, we need to talk. Because that in itself is a sin. It's called pride. Because all of us are sinners. The Bible says so. All have sinned. We are all sinners. Am I going, whoop, yep, I'm a sinner. No. It's a humbling thing to realize your place in this world. I am a sinner. And yet... God's forgiveness causes us to lift him up instead of ourselves up. Our first church was near Savannah, Georgia. And during that time, the city of Savannah was awarded the dubious distinction of being the murder capital of Georgia. And I remember the local radio host making fun of this by shouting, we're number one, we're number one. There should be no pride, I know he was joking, but there should be no pride in how sinful we are, but only pride in the forgiveness of our God. Despite how much sin we have been part of, God says, I want to forgive you. Life is not a contest of how much sin we can get away with, but how much we can forgive the sins of others. Last week you heard the parable of the unmerciful servant. There's no way that this kind of forgiveness adds up, and that's the point. Like we heard in our scripture reading, it's not about numbers, it's about being Christ-like. We cannot even begin to pay back the price of God's forgiveness, but we can forgive others for what they have done to us. We can actually live a life of forgiveness, forgiving people before they hurt you. Did you know that's possible? I think we've talked about that before. Forgive, ⁓ You don't wait, well, ⁓ wait, you hurt me now, I guess I need to forgive you. No, forgive them first. Forgive them before they hurt you. And that way, you'll find you get hurt far less than you used to because you've already forgiven. People ready for God's kingdom will model the limitless forgiveness that they have received. I've quoted this song several times to you, and I'm gonna do it again because this song is so meaningful to me. I learned it at summer camp as a teenager. And I remember sitting there singing this at summer camp going, ⁓ that's the gospel. I know what the gospel is now. He paid a debt he did not owe. I owe a debt I could not pay. I needed someone to wash my sins away, and now I sing a brand new song, Amazing Grace. Christ Jesus paid a debt that I could never pay. And when I heard that song at camp, I went, ⁓ Send your kids to camp. ⁓ they'll learn some things maybe they shouldn't, but wow, they'll learn some things they should too. I learned the gospel at summer camp. Even though I'd heard it all my life, it finally made sense. All of this talk of limitless forgiveness sets us up for what happens next in the story of Matthew. Look at Matthew chapter 19. Matthew chapter 19, we're going to begin with verse 1. Don't forget the background that we just went through. It's very important here. Now it came to pass, Matthew 19, one, when Jesus had finished these sayings that he departed from Galilee and came to the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. And great multitudes followed him and he healed them there. The Pharisees also came to him testing him saying to him, is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason? And he answered and said to them, Have you not read that he who made them at the beginning made them male and female and said, for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh? Verse six. So then they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore, while God has joined together, let no man separate. They said to him, why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce and to put her away? And he said to them, Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives. But from the beginning, it was not so. And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife except for sexual immorality, and marries another commits adultery. And whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery. His disciples said to them, if such is the case of a man with his wife, it's better not to marry. But he said to them, all cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given. For there are eunuchs who were born thus from their mother's womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men. And there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He who is able to accept it, let him accept it. While in many ways Jesus' teaching on divorce do not fit with the discourse of chapter 18, in other ways they're inseparable. Both sections deal with human relationships. Divorce and remarriage certainly needs to be seen in terms of God's forgiveness. And a Christian approach to divorce and remarriage must be seen in light of the cross. In this story, We find that Jesus has once again entered Judea in what turns out to be the last major journey of his ministry. In Judea, he finds not only the usual crowds, but also the usual pharisaic troublemakers. As usual, they are seeking to find some fault with Jesus. And this time, it's in the area of divorce. By their question of whether it's lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason, the Pharisees are hoping to draw Jesus into a contemporary Jewish argument regarding divorce. The controversy is over the proper interpretation of Deuteronomy 24.1, which permits a man to divorce his wife if he finds something indecent about. The school of Shammai interpreted that phrase to mean adultery. While those scribes following Hallel viewed it as including many less serious things. It could be anything you find displeasing. Okay, goodbye. And the relationship is dissolved. At the very least, the Pharisees hoped to force Jesus to choose a side on the issue, thus alienating many of the people in the crowd that are following him. Hey, if he chooses one side, he's gonna lose this half of the crowd. If he chooses that side, he's gonna lose the other half. They didn't really care which side he fell on as long as he lost followers. But Jesus, once again, he eludes the trap. He took the argument Moses back to Genesis implying that what happened as early as creation carries more weight than what Moses said thousands of years later. Jesus did not do away with Moses but showed what God intended from the beginning. Jesus makes some strong points about marriage in these verses. First, marriage was designed by God. It is a God-given ordinance rather than just a social contract. Second, marriage is an ordinance between the sexes. God made them male and female. God's intention was not a unisex world. There are God-ordained differences between men and women. These differences complement each other. Both male and female are created in whose image? You mean both of them? Really? That's what the Bible says. They are different, but they are equal. Marriage is not a master-servant relationship. That's the way it is in many cultures today. Even my beloved Kenya, you would see the women walking behind the men. ⁓ sometimes they would even talk to the women, but not usually. Marriage is not a parent-child relationship. Marriage is an image of God relationship. Marriage, when a couple is married, they experience being kind of like God. Because now they can create new life called babies. They can experience that creative. The difference between male and female are so obvious it seems silly to have to point this out, but the times in which we live. People have come up with so many alternatives to God's plan that it's easy to lose count. I don't know how many letters there are now. The whole alphabet plus. No wonder the world is such a dysfunctional mess. Why? Because it is Satan's plan to destroy the image of God. And anything he can do alternative to God's plan helps destroy God's image. Third, marriage is intended to be permanent. The two will become one flesh. It was never intended that marriage relationship ever be broken by any indecency, quote. No matter who interprets what that means, Hallel or Shammai or anybody else, any deviation from this is not God's plan. Yes, there are permissive things like, okay, well, do this. sexual immorality, I get it, because when you worship idols, I call that adultery, and I divorce myself from you to some degree. But how many times did God say, okay, I'll take you back? We have the whole story of Hosea and Gomer. Is that possible today? to take somebody back that has destroyed trust? I had a good pastor friend one time. He had a beautiful wife and a new child. And he did the unthinkable. And this wife says, you're staying with me. We'll work this out. And she did. She held that family together. It was not easy, but she held it together. It is possible to be the Hosea and Gomer. She held it together and they are together to this day, decades later. It's possible, but God says, I understand, because you guys are idolatrous and I know how you feel. I don't trust you anymore. But God's ideal is for marriage to be permanent. Fourth, marriage is exclusive. Two are to become one flesh. Not three, not four, or any other number that man can imagine. That ideal rules out the affairs of today and the polygamy found in the Old Testament. God allowed for polygamy back then just as he permitted many other things that were less than ideal. God met people where they were and then he gently pulled them closer to his ideal. Generation after generation. It's like in Kenya, I watched a well being drilled for the Messiah. And I remember when that drill bit hit water and water started to bubble up from the ground. The Messiah were thrilled. They now have water close by. And I stood back and I watched and the old men, they stood there, yeah, yeah, that's good. kids went up and drank it while the old men stood around going, good job. Because the old men don't drink water. The adults don't drink water. They drink cows, blood mixed with milk. Yeah, it's an interesting procedure. That's what they drink. That's why their life expectancy is also so short. But so you wouldn't see the adults going up to drink the fresh new water. But the children did. And that's where you start. Okay, we're not, okay, you should be drinking water instead of milk and blood, but we're gonna teach your kids, drink water. And you see, generation after generation, they're gonna learn to do things better. That's how God meets us where we are. And today's missionaries are taught differently than yesterday's missionaries. Yesterday's missionaries to Africa were taught, when you see polygamy, you stop it right now. Tell that chief that he has to get rid of all of his wives except the first one. And they would, once they were converted. Okay, all the rest of you wives, goodbye. Your children with you. You are now disfellowshipped from the family. Well, the wives had no alternatives most of the time to survive than to go into prostitution, to make some money. Do you think that's what God wanted? No. But, missionaries are taught, you teach the children only one. Not five, not 12, only one. And you teach generation after generation to get closer back to God's original creation, ideal. Adam was not faced when he woke up. He only lost one rib. He didn't lose five or six. Evidently, it's the rib that helps us read minds, but he only lost the rib, one. And God wants to bring us back to his ideal. Fifth, marriage creates a nuclear family unit. It includes both leaving one's parents and uniting with a spouse. Thus marriage becomes the strongest and most important of all human relationships, thus requiring a great, well, let's put it this way, the greatest amount of forgiveness. Sixth, marriage is not for everyone. The disciples are shocked by Jesus' description of the nature of marriage. He has been tougher even than Shemaim. So the disciples suggest that if it's impossible to get out of marriage, it may be best not to get into marriage to begin with. And while not denying this, Jesus does say that not everyone can accept it. Then he adds that some will renounce their right to marriage because of the kingdom of heaven. This is the category where we find Jesus and John the Baptist in his later years' Jesus' words leave no doubt about divorce as an act that falls short of God's ideal. He agrees with Malachi 2.16 in the Old Testament where God said, I hate divorce. When I look at couples, maybe they're wanting some counseling to get married, I often ask the question, what can you do for God better as a couple than you could do as singles? Make them think about that. Wow, nothing. Well, why are you getting married? Because everything brings glory to God. And if you can give glory to God being a couple, get married. Do things for God as a couple. And some, like Paul says, hey, you know what? I can travel a lot easier alone without a family, without things to have to worry about back home. And so he became that kind of a missionary. Many missionaries get divorces because the work is so hard and can be so time consuming that you seldom see each other. I remember meeting Susan on the sidewalk at Maxwell Academy going, don't I know you from somewhere? You look really familiar to me. and I did so much marriage counseling for missionaries. It was tough. And God says if you If you're going to get married thinking you're going to get divorced, he says, I hate divorce. You know, don't often hear God say he hates something, but he hates divorce. But divorces do take place in a less than perfect world, as do remarriages. However, Second marriages, according to Jesus, are certainly less than God's ideal after a divorce. Jesus refers to them as adulterous, just as God calls people who worship other gods adulterous. The only exception given in Matthew 19 is when the ideal has been already shattered by the other partner. This is not a happy thought for those who have done all they could to save a marriage that failed, yet still have the God-given urge to be in a marriage relationship. Fortunately, divorce and remarriage are not unpardonable sins. though some saints try to make it seem like that is the truth. We must never forget that Jesus' teaching on divorce and remarriage in Matthew 19 follows his teachings on forgiveness in Matthew 18. Like any other sin except for hardness to the Holy Spirit that we discussed a little while back, divorce and remarriage can be forgiven. For that forgiveness to take place, men and women in such circumstances must confess that they have fallen short of God's ideal and stand in need of his cleansing grace. just like any other sin. Such individuals can and will be forgiven. But like other sins, one should not enter into it with the thought, ⁓ I can do this now because God will forgive me later. This is a case of presumption back to my will be done instead of thy will be done. Yes, divorce and remarriage can be forgiven, but I believe that the reason God says so emphatically, I hate divorce, is how many it hurts. Not just the husband and the wife, but the extended family, the parents, the in-laws, children suffer in many ways for the rest of their lives. All family events and holidays are now filled with stress. I know, I've done the weddings. ⁓ you're the parents. Okay, you'll be sitting here and you'll be sitting back there. So stress, God never wanted that. Where do we go? Who do we have to invite? Where are the kids gonna be next weekend? On and on and on. I hear these laments on a regular basis. Yes, forgiveness may happen, but sadness and confusion last a lifetime. Even the very image of God is hurt by divorce. No wonder he hates it. No wonder Jesus talks about divorce so close to his talk on forgiveness. With more forgiveness, there would be less divorce. I love a little drawing I saw a while back. It's of a very, very old couple. And they're sitting on a bench. It looks like it's in a park. And the bench doesn't have a back. And she's facing one way sitting on the bench, and he's facing the other way sitting on the bench. And they're sitting there totally grumped out with each other. You can tell they have had a fight. Yeah, old couples have fights too. and they're sitting there and you can tell they're just riled up with each other and it's pouring rain. Just like this morning. And he's sitting there on one side and he's holding a small umbrella over her. While they're mad, he's not holding it over himself, he's holding it over her. Still mad at each other, but there's still love. There's gonna be forgiveness, and it might not even be today before the sun sets, maybe tomorrow, but there's gonna be forgiveness because they have love for each other. And God has love for us, and so many times he's holding the umbrella over us while we are yet sinners. He says, still love you. And there's gonna be forgiveness when you get your head together and come around. individuals caught in the problem of divorce and remarriage for whatever reason need the compassion of the church as well as the forgiving grace of God. Why should the church leave you in your most horrible situation? What you're going through. Be there. We don't have to go, hey, good job with the divorce. No, be there for each other. Matthew 18 shows us that not only God's forgiveness for such individuals, but also the duty of humans to forgive. And beyond forgiveness, Matthew 18 commands compassion for such hurting, repenting individuals. Those who are overly critical of their sincerity, of their sincerely repentant brothers and sisters have forgotten God's forgiveness that has been extended to them in so many places. Yeah, God hates divorce. Don't do it. But if it happens, don't feel like now I'm going to hell because I've committed some unpardonable sin. You'll feel like you're in hell, maybe even for the rest of your life. But God has a better plan. God says, I want you to be together. I want your marriage not to be hell. I want you to love each other and that requires unlimited forgiveness. Maybe even forgiveness before you get hurt. I forgive. Jesus explains that God's mercy to us is based on the mercy we show each other. That'll wake you up. He forgives as we forgive. It doesn't add up. And I'm so glad. I may get frustrated when the accounting books don't add up and make sense, but I'm thrilled that God's forgiveness doesn't add up or make sense. In fact, the blood of Jesus wipes all of my sinful accounts right off the page. There's nothing left. I need His power to help me do that for others.

Matthew 19 · chapter mention Matthew 19 · chapter mention