"Loving Husbands Lead" Ephesians 5:25-33

[SPEAKER_00]: Welcome to the preaching ministry of the Agopic Baptist Church in George, South Africa.

[SPEAKER_02]: Good morning church.

[SPEAKER_02]: As always, it's a joy to be with you, to open the Word of God with you.

[SPEAKER_02]: If you're visiting the day, I hope that you are able to say when today, when this morning is over,

[SPEAKER_02]: that you were able to worship the Lord, that you heard from God, not from a 35-year-old man, but that you got to hear God's word presented as God meant it.

[SPEAKER_02]: That is my hope.

[SPEAKER_02]: So as we go to the word, please turn with me to Ephesians, chapter five, Ephesians, chapter five.

[SPEAKER_02]: in this series that we've been doing where we've been focusing on the family.

[SPEAKER_02]: We first saw that the family is essential for God's glory and our good.

[SPEAKER_02]: God's glory and our good.

[SPEAKER_02]: Then last week we saw how the wife glorifies God in the way that she submits to a sinful husband.

[SPEAKER_02]: We saw that this is how the wife is called by God to glorify him and bring good to herself and to her family by submitting to her husband, to her own husband.

[SPEAKER_02]: Today we focus on the husband's role in marriage and how he is supposed to glorify God by loving his own wife.

[SPEAKER_02]: Husbands glorify God by loving their own wife.

[SPEAKER_02]: And I'm going to attempt to show you from God's word in Ephesians 5, that husbands are commanded by God to love their wives by leading their wives.

[SPEAKER_02]: You might say, whoa, that's a stretch.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's a stretch.

[SPEAKER_02]: Well, that's my test today to show you,

[SPEAKER_02]: That love is not just, God is not just commanding husbands to have warm, cozy feelings towards their wives.

[SPEAKER_02]: That is not the primary thought in God's mind as He will show us.

[SPEAKER_02]: God is going to command husbands to love their wives by leading their wives or simply put loving husbands lead, loving husband's lead.

[SPEAKER_02]: We're going to look at that in Ephesians 5.

[SPEAKER_02]: So please look with me down, beginning at verse 25.

[SPEAKER_02]: I'll read through verse 33, focusing on husbands.

[SPEAKER_02]: God says, in verse 25,

[SPEAKER_02]: Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word so that he might present the church to himself in splendor without spot or wrinkle in any such thing that she might be holy and without blemish.

[SPEAKER_02]: in the same way, husbands should love their wives as their own bodies.

[SPEAKER_02]: He who loves his wife loves himself.

[SPEAKER_02]: For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body.

[SPEAKER_02]: Therefore a man shall leave his father

[SPEAKER_02]: This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ in the church.

[SPEAKER_02]: However, that each one of you love his wife as himself.

[SPEAKER_02]: Let's go to Lord and pray.

[SPEAKER_02]: Heavenly Father, thank you for your Word and for your Holy Spirit who is here among us.

[SPEAKER_02]: I pray, Lord.

[SPEAKER_02]: that your word would be clearly seen today heard today, that we would think upon your word and that we would delight in your word, trusting in it, letting it heal us, please, Lord.

[SPEAKER_02]: Would you soften hard hearts?

[SPEAKER_02]: Would you lift up those who are discouraged?

[SPEAKER_02]: And Father, may you unite us as a church?

[SPEAKER_02]: where we are filled with husbands who love their wives as Christ loved the church.

[SPEAKER_02]: Though that be impossible for us, all things are possible with God.

[SPEAKER_02]: That is what we believe by faith and we call on you, Father, to please bless us in this way.

[SPEAKER_02]: In Jesus' name, amen.

[SPEAKER_02]: So first, we're gonna look at,

[SPEAKER_02]: how loving husbands lead in self-sacrifice.

[SPEAKER_02]: They're going to lead in this marriage, in self-sacrifice for their wives.

[SPEAKER_02]: That is what we first look at in Ephesians.

[SPEAKER_02]: Look with me at verse 25.

[SPEAKER_02]: There God commands husbands to love your wives.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is a command.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is not an option or a suggestion.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is a command from God who is your Creator, man.

[SPEAKER_02]: He owns you.

[SPEAKER_02]: Do you realize that?

[SPEAKER_02]: You do not belong to yourself.

[SPEAKER_02]: It doesn't matter if you are a Christian or an unbeliever, he created you, he owns you.

[SPEAKER_02]: If you're a Christian, he has purchased you with the blood of Jesus Christ.

[SPEAKER_02]: You are not your own and your master, Lord Creator commands you.

[SPEAKER_02]: to love your wife.

[SPEAKER_02]: He is the one who has given you your wife.

[SPEAKER_02]: And he is the one who stands as witness of the covenant promise you made to your wife.

[SPEAKER_02]: Husbands, you must love your wife in order to walk with God.

[SPEAKER_02]: If you are not loving your wife, you are not walking with

[SPEAKER_02]: God's face is against you.

[SPEAKER_02]: In 1 Peter 3, 7, we read, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life.

[SPEAKER_02]: They're going as Christians, women are inheriting eternal life with you men,

[SPEAKER_02]: That's what he's arguing, and he gives a warning.

[SPEAKER_02]: He says, live in an understanding way with them, as airs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

[SPEAKER_02]: When you pray, husbands, you are lifting your voice to the throne of mercy and grace.

[SPEAKER_02]: You, when you pray men, you are calling on God to please show you mercy and grace.

[SPEAKER_02]: Grace is unmerited favor, blessing, but men, if we are not loving our wives, God says, you are squeezing the channel of grace shut.

[SPEAKER_02]: God says you are hindering your own prayers and to some degree, God is going to stop listening to your prayers until you start loving your wife.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is serious.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is deadly serious, man.

[SPEAKER_02]: But to what degree?

[SPEAKER_02]: Does a husband need to love his wife?

[SPEAKER_02]: How far do we need to go into this?

[SPEAKER_02]: When can we say that we've checked off this box?

[SPEAKER_02]: We all know him in love boxes?

[SPEAKER_02]: When can we check it off?

[SPEAKER_02]: When can we say that's done?

[SPEAKER_02]: God, the Father points to Jesus' love for his bride, the church and says, like that.

[SPEAKER_02]: Love her, like that, like Jesus loves the church.

[SPEAKER_02]: But what does Jesus' love look like?

[SPEAKER_02]: Let's think about this.

[SPEAKER_02]: We've seen in our study through the gospel of John that before the creation of the world, the Son of God chose to treasure the church, despite knowing that the church would be sinful, hard-hearted and would rebel against his rule, at least initially, and all along the way,

[SPEAKER_02]: don't we all struggle with rebellion still to this day as Christians?

[SPEAKER_02]: Now that sounds crazy that anyone would willingly jump into that kind of relationship.

[SPEAKER_02]: I know she's going to be sinful, the church.

[SPEAKER_02]: I know she's going to be hard-hearted at times, often, and I know she's going to rebel against me before, during, and only when she's made perfect in the end, it was her rebellion end.

[SPEAKER_02]: completely.

[SPEAKER_02]: Now that sounds crazy.

[SPEAKER_02]: Who would do that to themselves?

[SPEAKER_02]: Whether we realize it or not, every man who chooses to treasure a woman as his wife.

[SPEAKER_02]: They do that despite the fact that she is going to be sinful.

[SPEAKER_02]: She is going to be hard-hearted about certain things, or at certain times.

[SPEAKER_02]: And she is going to be consistently tempted all her days to rebel against the way he rules their home.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's just fact.

[SPEAKER_02]: From the beginning, from Genesis we are told that her heart is going to be turned in such a way due to the fall that she's going to want to rule over her husband.

[SPEAKER_02]: though God has given him the rule.

[SPEAKER_02]: There's going to be a battle in our heart.

[SPEAKER_02]: She's going to be consistently tempted to try and grab the reins and yank it in the direction.

[SPEAKER_02]: She thinks it needs to go.

[SPEAKER_02]: By her will, by her power, by her wisdom.

[SPEAKER_02]: That is what every man agrees to when they stand in front of the church and they say, I do, though very few realize that's what they're agreeing to.

[SPEAKER_02]: They are agreeing to love as sinful, hard-hearted at times, and yes rebellious woman.

[SPEAKER_02]: Just as Christ agreed to love his church.

[SPEAKER_02]: But the Son of God, what do you think about it?

[SPEAKER_02]: He could have refused.

[SPEAKER_02]: He could have said, no, I will not love her until she is perfect.

[SPEAKER_02]: until she perfectly submits to me.

[SPEAKER_02]: He's the Son of God.

[SPEAKER_02]: He could have demanded a perfect bride.

[SPEAKER_02]: But the theme of the Bible is that for the praise of the glorious grace of God, the Son of God loved a sinful bride, even to the point of death.

[SPEAKER_02]: That is the theme of the Bible.

[SPEAKER_02]: With the cross as it's centerpiece and the marriage feast of the Lamb at the ending, or the beginning of the new story, or the new beginning, the marriage feast of the Lamb at the end of this age.

[SPEAKER_02]: Think carefully with me why Jesus chose the sinful bride.

[SPEAKER_02]: He chose to love her, despite her sin, for the praise.

[SPEAKER_02]: of the glorious grace of God.

[SPEAKER_02]: For God's glory, specifically for the glory of the praise of His glorious grace on merit and favor.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's from Ephesians 1, 3 through 14.

[SPEAKER_02]: Go read that.

[SPEAKER_02]: Go study that passage.

[SPEAKER_02]: What a beautiful passage about the husband.

[SPEAKER_02]: going to death for the praise of God's glory and for the good of his bride, which brings Jesus Christ great joy.

[SPEAKER_02]: He is filled with joy because he gets to bring his bride into heaven.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's Ephesians 1.

[SPEAKER_02]: The back to our passage.

[SPEAKER_02]: Ephesians 5, 25, tells us very briefly about the

[SPEAKER_02]: That's a single phrase that describes everything Jesus did in the short 30 years of his life here on earth.

[SPEAKER_02]: We know if you read the gospels that he gave up the peace of heaven as the Son of God to pursue his bride lost in the cursed world we live in.

[SPEAKER_02]: Lost in her own sin, he gave up the peace of heaven to pursue her in her sin.

[SPEAKER_02]: so that his bride could be clothed.

[SPEAKER_02]: He went hungry so that his bride could be filled.

[SPEAKER_02]: He was rejected by men, so his bride could be accepted by God.

[SPEAKER_02]: He was mocked as a failure on the cross.

[SPEAKER_02]: They laughed at him, they scorned him.

[SPEAKER_02]: They said, you did all of these things, but you can't even bring yourself down from the cross.

[SPEAKER_02]: They mocked him as a failure as a fraud so that she could attain heaven.

[SPEAKER_02]: He was beaten, flogged, and nailed to a cross of wood, so that she would never have to experience the burning furnace of God's wrath against her sin.

[SPEAKER_02]: By the way, that's what Jesus was doing on the cross.

[SPEAKER_02]: He was paying the penalty to God His Father for His Brides' sins.

[SPEAKER_02]: or an example to us of how to live.

[SPEAKER_02]: Is it those things?

[SPEAKER_02]: Yes, of course it's those things, but what was happening was a payment was being made to the holy and righteous judge of all the years.

[SPEAKER_02]: So that his bride could walk into heaven, clothed and righteous robes, pure, holy, blameless.

[SPEAKER_02]: He died.

[SPEAKER_02]: so that she could have life.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is what Ephesians is speaking about.

[SPEAKER_02]: When it says, so briefly, he gave himself up for her.

[SPEAKER_02]: Ephesians 5, 26, and 27 goes on to say that Jesus' goal was his bride's sanctification or holy making.

[SPEAKER_02]: He was going to make her beautiful.

[SPEAKER_02]: She was not beautiful when he arrived on the scene.

[SPEAKER_02]: No.

[SPEAKER_02]: We can read in the Old Testament about how God sees sinful Israel wallowing in their own filth.

[SPEAKER_02]: The Old Testament does not hide the fact of God's disgust at Israel in their sin.

[SPEAKER_02]: But Jesus comes.

[SPEAKER_02]: He lives, he dies, he has raised from the dead, and he's seated at the right hand of the father, so to make his bride the church beautiful.

[SPEAKER_02]: Beautiful.

[SPEAKER_02]: After redeeming her, he washes her with his words, Ephesians 5 says, cleansing her of her sinfulness, and cloths her in splendor.

[SPEAKER_02]: God's doing that right now.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's Jesus's goal for us right now.

[SPEAKER_02]: Our sanctification, washing us in the Word, cleansing us of the sin that still sticks to us, clothing us in splendor.

[SPEAKER_02]: We will be holy and blemish, Jesus says, He says, I will not stop until you are holy and without blemish and you are beautiful in the sight of God.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is Jesus' love.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is his love.

[SPEAKER_02]: The choice to lead his bride toward eternal joy, no matter what the personal cost might be.

[SPEAKER_02]: So if we ask the question, what is Jesus' love like?

[SPEAKER_02]: It is the choice to do everything necessary, to go before his bride and to bring her into eternal joy in the presence of God, no matter what it costs him.

[SPEAKER_02]: He says, I will not stop.

[SPEAKER_02]: I will not rest until the day that I know that you are experiencing eternal joy with God.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's when our effort gets to end and that is the goal of our effort.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is glorious.

[SPEAKER_02]: So glorious in the sight of God, that the entire history of creation is centered around this sacrifice of the husband for his sinful bride, God declares, this is glorious.

[SPEAKER_02]: And men, the scriptures are full.

[SPEAKER_02]: of calls to you, to seek this kind of glory that comes from God.

[SPEAKER_02]: God says, don't seek the glory that comes from men, seek the glory that comes from God.

[SPEAKER_02]: The honor, the praise, the well done, good and faithful servant, the glory that comes from God.

[SPEAKER_02]: And God says, through out Scripture for husbands, that there is glory honor.

[SPEAKER_02]: a good name and blessings from the Lord to be gained for husbands who lead in self-sacrifice for the joy of their brides.

[SPEAKER_02]: As Ephesians will go on to explain, in verse 28, we read

[SPEAKER_02]: in the same way as Christ.

[SPEAKER_02]: So we just looked at the example of Christ, how he loved, in the same way as Christ, husbands should love their wives as their own bodies.

[SPEAKER_02]: He who loves his wife loves himself.

[SPEAKER_02]: Husbands who love their wives find themselves the recipient of blessing.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's what this is picking up on.

[SPEAKER_02]: Now that doesn't seem right.

[SPEAKER_02]: If I, as a man, let's just, let's turn our brains on for a second.

[SPEAKER_01]: Just think about this with logic, which we love.

[SPEAKER_02]: If I give up my rights, even my comfort and my time and my energy, if I give it up willingly in order to love, selflessly, the sinful woman,

[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to be the recipient of good.

[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to be blessed.

[SPEAKER_02]: It doesn't make sense.

[SPEAKER_02]: It seems upside down to this world.

[SPEAKER_02]: This world tells us in our heart scream at us daily that if I do this, I'm going to be treated like a dormant.

[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to lose everything I care about.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's going to be taken away from me, like my comfort, my power.

[SPEAKER_02]: My influence, my control, it's going to be taken away from me.

[SPEAKER_02]: The world screams that if you want to experience happiness, then you must seize what is yours.

[SPEAKER_02]: You must wrestle with power.

[SPEAKER_02]: You must keep a list of wrongs in your back pocket as insurance so you can pull it out and use it as a weapon in your disagreements with your spouse, with your wife.

[SPEAKER_02]: Our hearts tell us that we need to yell the loudest what our needs are to in order to get our needs.

[SPEAKER_02]: And we need to punish our spouse.

[SPEAKER_02]: We need to make them feel like dirt if they get in the way of me and my desires.

[SPEAKER_02]: If they get in between me and my desires, the only way to fix that is to treat them like dirt, to hurt them, punish them.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's what the world yells at us.

[SPEAKER_02]: in what our hearts are tempted by daily.

[SPEAKER_02]: But God says that this is human foolishness, foolishness.

[SPEAKER_02]: This comes from not believing that there is a God in heaven, who is true and who created us and who knows how to bring humans enjoy.

[SPEAKER_02]: is actually, if you live this way, you are actually hating yourself and doing harm to your own body.

[SPEAKER_02]: You say, how is that happening?

[SPEAKER_02]: Why would that be true?

[SPEAKER_02]: Because from the very beginning, God said of marriage in Genesis 224, which is then quoted here in our passage of Ephesians 531.

[SPEAKER_02]: God says,

[SPEAKER_02]: Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife and the two shall become one flesh or one body, husband, your wife is one body with you.

[SPEAKER_02]: When you are united to a woman in marriage, you are promising before God to make her

[SPEAKER_02]: Alright, if you didn't know that when you got married, that's actually what's happening.

[SPEAKER_02]: It is a covenant promise that you know and you are agreeing that this woman is going to be made one flesh with me.

[SPEAKER_02]: I acknowledge that and I promise to live that way.

[SPEAKER_02]: So we make the promise when we get married and God honors that promise by making her needs your own.

[SPEAKER_02]: God's gonna make them yours when you get married.

[SPEAKER_02]: He says, He is going to honor that promise.

[SPEAKER_02]: So as we find out through all of scripture and in real life experience, if you love your wife, you are blessed, man.

[SPEAKER_02]: You receive a blessing from the Lord.

[SPEAKER_02]: When you love your wife as your own body.

[SPEAKER_02]: But if you ignore your wife,

[SPEAKER_02]: Or if you despise her, men, then you are the one who is going to suffer along with her.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's just a fact of marriage and of life.

[SPEAKER_02]: You love her and lead her in self-sacrifice, you will be blessed by God, even unbelievers get a taste of that.

[SPEAKER_02]: out of self-preservation sometimes, they even get to taste the truth of this.

[SPEAKER_02]: But Christian husbands, you don't just get to taste this.

[SPEAKER_02]: If you believe this and live this, then you can drink from this.

[SPEAKER_02]: If you love your wife, you will be blessed if you ignore your wife, then you will suffer.

[SPEAKER_02]: husband should love their wives as their own bodies.

[SPEAKER_02]: He who loves his wife loves himself because you are one.

[SPEAKER_02]: For no one ever hated his own flesh or his own body, but nourishes and cherishes it just as Christ does the church because we are members of his body.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is the second way I want you to think about how the men, how husbands are called

[SPEAKER_02]: Loving husbands lead in nourishing and cherishing their wives.

[SPEAKER_02]: You want to love your husbands?

[SPEAKER_02]: You say, how?

[SPEAKER_02]: Lead her.

[SPEAKER_02]: Lead that relationship.

[SPEAKER_02]: Lead that marriage.

[SPEAKER_02]: By no matter what she's doing, you have chosen to nourish and cherish her as your own body.

[SPEAKER_02]: an hour in front of the mirror every morning prepping our public appearance some of you might out with whole judgment but most of us pride ourselves that we kind of roll out a bed, slap some water on our face and we go go out to conquer the day because who cares about the body.

[SPEAKER_02]: I'm just going to muscle my way through this day.

[SPEAKER_02]: So that might be how we feel or like to present ourselves.

[SPEAKER_02]: But behind all of this in difference towards our own bodies, we actually do care a whole lot about our own bodies.

[SPEAKER_02]: We do.

[SPEAKER_02]: We love our bodies.

[SPEAKER_02]: All it takes is a single blow to our digits, our thumb with a hammer.

[SPEAKER_02]: to reveal how much we love our bodies.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's all it takes.

[SPEAKER_02]: One little piece of skin could just be the very tip of my finger.

[SPEAKER_02]: Just the nail even if it gets struck with a hammer and starts to feel like it's gonna lift it off.

[SPEAKER_02]: It reveals how much we love our own bodies.

[SPEAKER_02]: It doesn't matter if you're in China, Australia, America, South America, Canada, France, South Africa, Europe, London, it doesn't matter.

[SPEAKER_02]: all around the world, you can find men jumping up and down in distress.

[SPEAKER_02]: As they cradle their thumb to their chest because they smashed it with a hammer.

[SPEAKER_02]: All around the world, the hammer might look different in different places.

[SPEAKER_02]: They might be yelling out different words in their pain.

[SPEAKER_02]: I can't tell you how many times how many weird looks like I got in America when I said, I know, I know.

[SPEAKER_02]: The words change, the hammer might change, but the response to smashing our thumbs, it's universal across the world.

[SPEAKER_02]: Men love their own bodies.

[SPEAKER_02]: And we don't have a problem remembering to love our own bodies.

[SPEAKER_02]: We don't.

[SPEAKER_02]: We don't struggle with this.

[SPEAKER_02]: But we do have a huge and massive problem.

[SPEAKER_02]: with remembering to daily love our wives as our own bodies we really struggle with this man.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's why God looks us in the face and commands it of us.

[SPEAKER_02]: Love them as your own body.

[SPEAKER_02]: Love them, care for them as you do for your own body.

[SPEAKER_02]: He commands us to daily remember this.

[SPEAKER_02]: So when we wake up in the morning and we're getting ready for the day and we're thinking about work, but we happen to run into our wife as we're both rushing different directions with kids or trying schedules or whatever it might be, this should be the type of thought that comes to our mind first thing in the morning when we see her.

[SPEAKER_02]: no.

[SPEAKER_02]: Rather, our first thought should be that is my one flesh partner.

[SPEAKER_02]: God has made her one with me, my own body.

[SPEAKER_02]: This men, this is where we're aiming for.

[SPEAKER_02]: Do we get it right every day?

[SPEAKER_02]: Absolutely not.

[SPEAKER_02]: But this is what we're aiming at.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is the target God has set on the wall and says, Aim for that, man.

[SPEAKER_02]: One body, think about this.

[SPEAKER_02]: And the more you think about it, man, guess what?

[SPEAKER_02]: What actually will happen?

[SPEAKER_02]: I don't know when you probably don't think this is possible.

[SPEAKER_02]: But as we think about this, over and we remember, over and over again, we will actually start to feel things.

[SPEAKER_02]: We will feel like she's part of me.

[SPEAKER_02]: I will feel things for her.

[SPEAKER_02]: And at the care of her, that didn't come naturally after two years of marriage, maybe.

[SPEAKER_02]: I will actually start to feel naturally.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's my wife, my one flesh, my body.

[SPEAKER_02]: And I care for her.

[SPEAKER_02]: So God commands us to daily remember and to grow and feeling that bond so that we will nourish and cherish our wives as our own body.

[SPEAKER_02]: Those are the words, God uses an Ephesians 28 through 30.

[SPEAKER_02]: He says nourish and cherish her as your own body.

[SPEAKER_02]: So, husbands are called by God to go before their wife, to lead their wife, and to think about her, to consider her, to care for her, and to provide what the husband knows she needs.

[SPEAKER_02]: You're leading in this men.

[SPEAKER_02]: Nourishment.

[SPEAKER_02]: to nourish her, you must lead in this.

[SPEAKER_02]: You're not simply waiting until she nags you to the point of you providing what she needs.

[SPEAKER_02]: No, no, man, lead in this because you love her and care for her as your own body, lead in nourishing her, providing what you know she needs.

[SPEAKER_02]: his wife is his own body, which cherish means to treat with tinderness and affection.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's a hard one, the tinderness one, that one will get us in trouble.

[SPEAKER_02]: Your wife is not a buddy and you cannot speak to her like you might speak to the men of work.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's not how God created her.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's not how God calls you to speak to her.

[SPEAKER_02]: He calls you to cherish her with tenderness and affection.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's the idea of bringing warmth to someone who is cold.

[SPEAKER_02]: This word is even used of mothers and how they feel for their newborn infants.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is hard for us, man.

[SPEAKER_02]: But think again about that whole idea of smashing your thumb and how you cradle your thumb to your chest.

[SPEAKER_02]: And you are so concerned that you're going to lose it.

[SPEAKER_01]: And you're worried to take that glove off because you're afraid of what's just going to be underneath the carnage that's going to be underneath the glove.

[SPEAKER_02]: Think about that and you will have a sense of how easy it is for us to cherish our own bodies, how God is calling us to do that, to make that choice to aim for that for our wives, in every area of her life.

[SPEAKER_02]: As another image, imagine with me, and so bear with me, but imagine with me, a husband walking in the rain.

[SPEAKER_02]: He has an umbrella in his left hand, he's holding it high, and kind of actually doing this odd thing where he's holding it kind of like this, doesn't look natural, but just what we do.

[SPEAKER_02]: And in his right arm, he's gotten his wife.

[SPEAKER_02]: He's got his arm wrapped around his wife around his shoulders, and he's pulled her in tight.

[SPEAKER_02]: And just to add drama to this image, he, before this, he took off his nice warm winter to rain jacket.

[SPEAKER_01]: He took it off, and he put it on her shoulders, because she was wearing something that was very beautiful and appearance, but completely impractical for a rainy day.

[SPEAKER_01]: And he pulls it tight, and then he gets out this umbrella, and he's holding it up over her head, and he's wrapping his arm around her shoulders, and he's pulling her end tight, and they're just walking in the rain, during a downpour.

[SPEAKER_01]: It's pouring rain all around them, but for some reason, they're still kind of smiling.

[SPEAKER_01]: It's kind of an odd image if you think about it.

[SPEAKER_02]: If you are,

[SPEAKER_02]: A young lady, or an older lady who has been poisoned in mind by the women's liberation movement.

[SPEAKER_02]: Why do you use the word poisoned unintentionally?

[SPEAKER_02]: If you've been poisoned in mind by this in recent years, then you might protest saying something along the lines of she doesn't need him to hold the umbrella.

[SPEAKER_02]: She's perfectly capable, she's got enough muscles in her arms to hold that umbrella.

[SPEAKER_02]: She can hold it herself and by the way keep your jacket I can survive on my own.

[SPEAKER_02]: I can make a plan and I can provide for myself to some degree women have been poisoned and it has inflamed the already present temptation to reject this what the husband is doing

[SPEAKER_02]: If you are a man who is selfish and men, this is one of the greatest temptations, we will face daily, is to be selfish in the way we interact with others and with our wives.

[SPEAKER_02]: But if you are a selfish man and you have let that flourish in your heart, you might say, why didn't she think to put on her own rain jacket before they left fouls?

[SPEAKER_01]: Why is she wearing that?

[SPEAKER_01]: She should have put on the ranger.

[SPEAKER_01]: It was starting to drizzle when we left.

[SPEAKER_02]: She was probably running late again and had to rush out of the house.

[SPEAKER_02]: These are the words and thoughts of men who are selfish.

[SPEAKER_02]: And we all get bitten by this bug.

[SPEAKER_02]: It lives inside of us, or putting it to death as Christians.

[SPEAKER_02]: So although women can be poisoned against this image and men can focus on their own comfort and selfishness after maybe years of marriage, although that is possible, as you imagine this couple walking in the rain together, a young man and his young bride, though it is pouring rain.

[SPEAKER_02]: though his left shoulder is always getting wet.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's just the umbrellas are never big enough.

[SPEAKER_02]: This shoulder is going to be soaked and he's wearing a thin shirt now.

[SPEAKER_02]: Even though he's facing some discomfort and even though that lady is being led as he walks her down the sidewalk, she's being led.

[SPEAKER_02]: Even though we could be poisoned against this, as you imagine this,

[SPEAKER_02]: What's probably most likely for a young husband and his young bride as they walk in the downpour smiling at each other?

[SPEAKER_02]: They're happy.

[SPEAKER_01]: They're happy.

[SPEAKER_01]: Why?

[SPEAKER_01]: Why is that young man happy?

[SPEAKER_02]: As his left shoulder is turned to ice, why is that young lady happy as she's being led down the sidewalk?

[SPEAKER_02]: I don't actually think that couple could probably explain to you why they feel happy.

[SPEAKER_02]: They probably couldn't put it into words, but God does put it into words.

[SPEAKER_02]: He reveals it in Scripture.

[SPEAKER_02]: The husband is happy because he is experiencing the joy of self-sacrifice as he nourishes and cherishes his wife during a downpour.

[SPEAKER_02]: He is feeling the God-given joy.

[SPEAKER_02]: This God-given joy because he has the privilege to lead in providing for his wife.

[SPEAKER_02]: Men, that does something to our souls.

[SPEAKER_02]: When we have the privilege to lead in this way, to provide for another, it does something.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's a God-given joy that even unbelievers get to taste.

[SPEAKER_02]: It is so real and so consistent, this truth.

[SPEAKER_02]: that it is across the world, that men, when they do this, taste joy and men, when you as a Christian do this because you want God to be glorified and you're doing this even though she's being sinful that day or she was a little hardhearted that day or her shoulder, she might have felt a little bit like, you know what, I don't know that I want to go down this path.

[SPEAKER_02]: when you do it in a loving and gentle, nourishing, cherishing way for her good and you do it gently, a tender affection for her.

[SPEAKER_02]: It does something for the soul of a Christian man to where you drink deeply from the blessing of God for you.

[SPEAKER_02]: The wife in this image is happy because she is experiencing the joy of feeling his warmth inside of his jacket.

[SPEAKER_02]: That does something to your soul, women.

[SPEAKER_02]: When you receive willingly the warmth that your husband is offering you and you wrap it around you as a honor, as a joy.

[SPEAKER_02]: It does something for your soul.

[SPEAKER_02]: It lifts you up, women.

[SPEAKER_02]: You feel the warmth inside of his jacket while he holds, you close to his side.

[SPEAKER_02]: sheltering you from the rain from the downpour.

[SPEAKER_02]: He says, I've got you.

[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to hold this over you.

[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to try my best to make sure not a single drop gets you.

[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to hold you tight.

[SPEAKER_02]: We're going to do this together and I'm going to bring you to this other building from the car to the building.

[SPEAKER_02]: Whatever it might be together.

[SPEAKER_02]: If a woman receives that with joy and without stiffness

[SPEAKER_02]: and you receive and permit him to do what God has called and to do with joy.

[SPEAKER_02]: When you receive it with joy, you are experiencing the God-given joy of receiving.

[SPEAKER_02]: Of having the privilege to receive the nourishment and cherishing of your husband.

[SPEAKER_02]: And in this picture, we see the mystery of marriage in a very simple, everyday illustration.

[SPEAKER_02]: A husband and a wife in a downpour.

[SPEAKER_02]: They are a joyful provider, provider, and a joyful receiver.

[SPEAKER_02]: Isn't that not the image of Christ and his church?

[SPEAKER_02]: Christ has come and provided everything.

[SPEAKER_02]: for our joy and our internal happiness in God.

[SPEAKER_02]: And what does Jesus say about that?

[SPEAKER_02]: Does he say, whoa, it was me.

[SPEAKER_02]: I had to suffer for my bride.

[SPEAKER_02]: No.

[SPEAKER_02]: He says for the Bible tells us that for the joy that was set before Him of walking down the aisle or standing before God is father at the wedding ceremony of the lamb, that wearing feasts of the lamb, for the joy of that he faced the cross.

[SPEAKER_02]: men there is joy, honor and glory, and self-sacrifice, enourishing and cherishing your sinful bride.

[SPEAKER_02]: Do not look at whether or not she submitting to you or honoring you, or whether she's playing her part, you lead that marriage.

[SPEAKER_02]: You stand, go ahead, you provide, you shelter from the heat of the curse of this world.

[SPEAKER_02]: So we'll get God made you for, to shelter her from that, and then you plead with God to work in her heart.

[SPEAKER_02]: You run ahead, and you plead with God that she will joyfully fall.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's what God's called us, too.

[SPEAKER_02]: And if you don't know how to do that in the specifics, I mean, I know I always talk about washing dishes.

[SPEAKER_02]: For whatever reason in my marriage, that one comes up frequently.

[SPEAKER_02]: Who's going to wash the sticky nasty pots and pans?

[SPEAKER_02]: And I'll tell you what Kelsey often is the one who does it the most.

[SPEAKER_02]: But what am I going to do when I come down the stairs from working all day?

[SPEAKER_02]: And I see that she hadn't gotten to it yet.

[SPEAKER_02]: If you want to talk more about the practical nature of that and you just don't know where to even begin in your marriage then please seek out one of

[SPEAKER_02]: the pastors of the church, or a godly man in our church who you know, by the way, he's living with his wife, he has done this for years and years.

[SPEAKER_02]: Seek them out, ask them to give you some ideas.

[SPEAKER_02]: But bottom line men, God has given you such a spread of options for how you can show honor to her as the weaker vessel, how you can just, you can just get creative with

[SPEAKER_02]: Make it a place that glorifies God.

[SPEAKER_02]: Make it a place where she feels nourished and cherished, warm, where she feels safe, not treading on ice all the time.

[SPEAKER_02]: Use your imagination for how you can create this kind of home.

[SPEAKER_02]: God calls you to it.

[SPEAKER_02]: And if you need more help than that, then please seek out the other older

[SPEAKER_02]: Heavenly Father, thank you for your word and for this call to love our wives.

[SPEAKER_02]: I pray that we would do this for your glory, for her joy, and for our good.

[SPEAKER_02]: We ask this all in Jesus' name.