Rick Warren - Happiness Can Be Learned—Part One

Hey, thanks for joining us today on Pastor Rick's Daily Hope,

the Bible Teaching Ministry of Rick Warren. And today we're

continuing our series called the Habits of Happiness. In this series,

Rick dives into the Book of Philippians and helps you

discover God's path to true and lasting happiness. Okay, and

now here's part one of a message called happiness can

be Learned.

Many people think that happiness is simply a matter of luck,

and they think if you're happy, you're just lucky. You

got lucky, you had happy circumstances, and so congratulations for you.

But actually, happiness can be learned. It is a quality

that you can learn. There are certain qualities that if

you learn them, your happiness in life is going to

go up exponentially. If you don't have these qualities in

your life, your unhappiness will go up exponentially. Now, you

probably never thought about this, but if I miss it

to you, you automatically know what I'm talking about, because

you could instinctively pick out qualities that cause you to

be happy and qualities that cause you to be unhappy.

For instance, if we made two columns, the happiness column

and the unhappiness column. And I said, now which column?

Would impatience go in unhappiness? Yeah, impatient people tend to

be unhappy people. Would you agree with that? And the

more patient you are, if you learn patience, you're going

to be happier in life. That obviously makes sense. If

I said, for instance, cruelty, that would go in the

unhappiness column, kindness would go on the happiness column. This

is kind of obvious, and we could make an entire

list if I said, if I'm arrogant, I'm going to

tend to be unhappy, and if I am humble, I'm

going to tend to be more happy. So what we're

going to do this weekend as we go through the

Book of Philippians is look at four very important qualities

you need to build it in your life. Now, happiness

is a serious business, and if you really want to

be happy, then you need to build these qualities in

your life. We're starting in Chapter two of Philippians, verses

nineteen down to verse thirty. Let me read it to

you and then we'll we'll look at it. Paul says this,

I hope in the Lord Jesus to send Timothy to

you soon. Now let me stop her and remind you

of the background. Paul is in prison in Rome. He's

writing a letter to a church in Greece, in a

city called Philippi, so we call it the Philippian Letter.

And Paul is writing to these church members of a

church he started in Greece, and they have been sending

him care packages. They've been They actually send him an

offering while he was in prison waiting to appeal his

execution before Caesar, who was Nero in Rome at the time.

And Paul is writing back to the Philippians. And this

book is actually a thank you letter. It is a

thank you letter for a financial gift. And in the

middle of this letter he gives some personal information. So

let me say it. Read it again. I hope in

the Lord Jesus to send Timothy to you soon so

that I may be cheered when I received news about you.

I have no one else like him. This is Timothy,

who takes a genuine interest in your welfare, for everybody

else looks after his own interest, not those of Jesus Christ.

But you know that Timothy has proved himself because as

a son with his father, he has served with me

in the work of the Gospel, the good News. I

hope therefore to send him Timothy as soon as I

can see how things go with me, and I'm confident

that I myself will come soon. In other words, I

hope I'm going to get out of jail and come

back to see you in Philippi. But he's says, I

think it is necessary to also send back to you Epaphriditis.

That's a long Greek name for a man. But that's

another guy like Timothy, Paphforditis, my brother, my fellow worker,

and my fellow soldier, who is also your messenger, whom

you sent to me to take care of my needs.

When the Philippians sent a financial gift to help Paul

always in prison Rome, they send it to a guy

named Apaphroditis, and he says, I'm going to send this

guy back to you, for he longs for all of

you because this was his home church. And he's distressed

because you heard he was ill. Indeed he was ill,

and he almost died in trying to get to Paul

on that trip to Rome. But God had mercy on him,

and not only on him, but also on me, to

spare me sorrow upon sorrow. Therefore, I am all the

more eager to send him back to you, so that

when you see him again, you may be glad, and

I maybe have they have less anxiety. So welcome him

in the Lord with great joy and honor men like him,

because he almost died for the work of Christ, risking

his life to make up for the help you could

not give me. Now, at a first glance, that doesn't

seem to be a very deep passage. You're going it

sounds like Paul's talking about two guys that are with

him in Rome that he's going to send back to Greece.

And when you read this letter, you might ask, why

in the world did God include that in the Bible.

I mean, why is that even there. It's just a

personal note about two guys the church that the Philippi

knows and that Paul knows, and they've helped each other.

And and you might think, you know, this is one

of those passages in the Bible just kind of read

over real quick and just get to the good parts,

and you would be wrong. You would be wrong, because

the Bible says everything in the Bible is there to

teach us by exams, and in this passage that I

just read, you are the examples of the four things

you must build into your life if you want to

really be happy, if you want to live consistently happy.

Now he has an example of these four choices that

leads to happiness in these two guys named Timothy and Epaphroditis.

Now here's the background. Paul intends to send two guys

who are with him in Rome while he's there in prison,

back to the Philippian Church. And he says in verse nineteen,

I'm going to send you Timothy, And in verse twenty

five he says, I'm going to send back to you Paphorditis,

who's a member of your church. And then Paul endorses

these two guys as role models. He says in verse

twenty of Timothy, I got nobody else like him. Now,

let me just stop right there for a minute. If Paul,

the apostle who wrote most of the New Testament, says

I don't know anybody like him in the whole world,

you better pay attention to this guy. When Paul says

I don't have anybody in my life like Timothy, then

you better pay attention to him. In fact, two of

the books of the Bible are called first and second,

Timothy written to this guy, so he's a very important character.

He says, I don't anybody like him. And then he

says about the other guy, Paphroditis, he says, I want

you to welcome him when I send him, and honor

him because he nearly died. He nearly died for my sake. Now,

Paul says, and here's the reason why we're looking in

this series on the habits of happiness. Paul says, I'm

going to send these guys to you for three reasons.

And he says this. He said in verse nineteen, so

that I may be cheered, so that I can be happy.

And then in verse twenty eight he says, so that

you may be happy, so you may be glad, you

may be happy. And then he says in verse twenty eight,

so that I may have less anxiety. So whatever these

guys are doing, however they are living, it's a way

that's gonna make you glad, it's gonna make me glad,

and it's gonna make us all have less anxiety. Now,

as your pastor, I want you to be happy, I

want me to be happy, and I want us all

to have less anxiety. So we're gonna look at this passage.

Does that make sense? And I'm gonna say, what is

it about these two guys that are so worthy? They're

in the Bible in a little footnote that looks like

kind of like just a personal hey, I'm sending these guys,

he says, in the Living Bible. These guys will make

me happy and lighten my cares. Now, what this passage

teaches us is that there are four qualities you need

to have in your life in order for your happiness

to go up and for the happiness of people around

you to go up too. And the first thing that

you have to learn is this. You're gonna have to learn.

Write this down to shift the focus away from myself.

That is the starting point for all happiness. I must

shift the focus away from myself. I have to care

about more than just me. I've got to care about

the needs of those around me. If all I think

about is me, me me, me, me, me me, me, myself,

an I I'm going to be a pretty miserable person.

If I truly want to be happy in life, I've

got to move the focus off myself. Now. Paul gives

Timothy as an example of this. In verse twenty twenty one,

he says this, I have nobody else like him who

takes a genuine interest in your welfare. For everybody else

looks out for his own interest. Would you say that's

true today? Of most people, everybody looks out for their

own interest. Not that many people are looking after your interest.

Could you name the people are looking after your interest?

Not many. Most people are looking after their own interest,

not yours. And as as naturally, I tend to look

at my own interest, I don't tend to look at

your interest. I don't get up in the morning and think, hmm,

I wonder if you're having a hard time today. Now

I'm always thinking about me. You tend to think about you.

Paul says, I've got nobody like this guy because he

actually takes a genuine interest in you, not simply in himself.

Everybody else looks out for his own interest. And noticing

that phrase there, he says, no one else, No one

else is like In other words, unselfish people are very

very rare. Nobody else is liking he says, who takes

a genuine interest. There are many people who fake interest

in you. It's so funny. Sometimes I go to these

parties and or these important diplomatic events, and people are

standing there talking to you, and they've got one of

these little you know, toast at things and a drink

in their hands, and they're not they're talking to you,

but the whole time they're looking over your show, like

is there anybody else more important I should be talking to?

They're pretending to take an interest in me, but they're

not really did me. They're looking over who else could

I talk to instead of this guy? Because they don't.

They're pretending that. He says that he takes a genuine interest.

A good News translation says he genuinely cares about you.

Others care only about themselves. And then once you circle

the phrase, it says, looks out everyone else looks out

for his own interest. Circle that phrase, looks out. What

we're talking about here is a matter of focus. The

first key to happiness is you've got to change your focus.

You have to shift your focus away from yourself onto

other people. You gotta look out for others. Now, do

you normally do that? Not? Normally. That's something you have

to learn to do. When you walk into a room,

you're not normally thinking who in this room needs my help.

You walk into the room, look, look and think, how

do I look? That's what you do. You walk in

and go how do I look? You know? Am I

put together just right? And you have to intentionally train

yourself to do the opposite, to shift the focus away

from myself the Phillips translations versus they're not People aren't

interested in you. They're all wrapped up in their own affairs.

Circle that phrase wrapped up. For those of you who

are single adults, let me just give you a little

fatherly advice. It's better to sit at home without a date,

then go date somebody who's all wrapped up in themselves.

Single women, A man wrapped up in himself is no gift. Guys.

A woman wrapped up in herself is no gift, he says.

They're wrapped up in their own affairs, so they're not caring,

they're not looking out for the needs of others. Now,

I think confession is good for the soul. Oh, I

have to admit to you that it saddens me how

many times I have missed the needs around me of

people that I love. I just totally missed them because

I wasn't paying attention. I just wasn't paying attention. I

wasn't looking out. I hadn't shifted the focus from me

to the others in the room. And when I wasn't

looking out for their needs, I missed their needs. And

that grieves me a lot. Philippins two four. We looked

at this verse last week, but I love it the

message paraphrase. It says, here, don't be so obsessed with

getting your own advantage, forget yourself long enough to lend

a helping hand. If you did that, you think you'd

be happier. Yes you would, Yes you would. You See,

this isn't easy to do because everything in our culture

and everything in our nature teaches to be self centered,

and America is becoming more and more self centered. I

read a report this week in Psychology, a scientific journal,

that said they studied one million books in print over

the last two hundred years in American history, and they

compared the words that were used then in the words

are used now, and the words that have increased in

number today are I, me, my choice, unique, special, These

words are being overused today. Words you don't hear much.

They are responsibility and prayer. Okay, those words that were

used a lot in the past, we're increasingly becoming more

self centered. In fact, I thought I'd just show you

a few ads that illustrate this, because we don't realize

how we're being brainwashed. Now. This first ad here on

the screen is a Coca Cola ad that says that

happiness is something you drink. It says, here's a coke bottle,

says open happiness. So if you just buy that product,

you drink it, then you will be happy. Happiness is

something you drink. Now, Audi came out with one that

says not only that joy is something you drive, and

it says, there joy finally has meaning. That's good to know.

And what is it? You know? It's an AUDI that

is an audacious goal? Is what that is? Right there? ADDI.

Now what Pepsi tells us is this all that matters

is today? Live for now an others. Don't plan about tomorrow,

don't care about other people, just live for now. And

Sprite tells us this, obey your thirst, okay, in other words,

give in to any urge you have. Okay. You're hearing

these message subliminal. It's all about you, It's all about you.

It's all about you. Burger King have it your way,

have it your way. Well, that's about us, you know.

Now that's not bad advice when you're ordering a hamburger,

but that's terrible advice for relationships. Here's a perfume product,

it's all about me. Yeah, yeah, it's all about me.

And then for smart counter culture programming or or you know, positioning,

the donut company did this one. I love donuts because

they're not self centered at all, little counter culture spin

on advertising. The bottom line is everything in culture teaches

you to think about you yu u yu you me

me me me me I I I, And so I

have to intentionally shift the focus away if I want

to be happy. Number two. The second thing you're going

to need to learn to be happy is this. If

you want to be happy, you're going to have to

become someone that people trust. You're going to have to

become someone that people trust. Proverbs thirteen fifteen says those

who can't be trusted are on the road to ruin. Now,

it's really obvious that the more people trust you, the

happier you're going to be. And if people don't trust you,

you're not going to be happy. If nobody trusts you,

you're living a pretty miserable life. So here's another quality

you can learn. If you learn to be trustworthy, you

learn to be reliable, you learn to be consistent, you

learn to be dependable, and you develop that quality in

your life, you're going to be a whole lot happier

than people who aren't worthy of trust. If you want

to be happy, you got to become somebody that people trust.

Now again, Paul uses Timothy as an example of this

verse twenty two. He says, Timothy has proven himself because

as a son with his father, he served with me

in the work of the gospel. Now again, he's given

this guy as an example, and he says, I've watched

this guy in action. I've seen this Timothy. I've seen

him in all kinds of circumstances. And he says, this guy, Timothy,

he's the real deal. He's the real McCoy. He's authentic,

he's genuine, he's trustworthy, he's dependable, he's reliable. You can

count on this guy. God's word translation says, you know

what kind of person Timothy proved to be. Do people

know what kind of person you really are? And are

you trustworthy? If you're not, then you're not very happy

because the more people trust you, the more your happiness

goes up. Now, he says, about this guy, Timothy, he's

proven trustworthy. He has been proven, he has been proved

over time, tested, verified, checked out. He is credible, he

is creditable. You know, anytime you go to a bank

for a loan, before they loan you any money, they're

going to do a thing on you called a credit check,

a credit check, and they're gonna say, are you worthy

of being trusted with credit? Are you creditable? Do you

pay your bills back? Are you paying them back on time?

Do you have a track record of keeping your word?

Do you have a track record of doing what you say?

Can you be dependent on that if we loan you

this money, you're not going to flake out on us

and we're going to lose it. They do a credit

check on you to see if you are credible or

credit worthy. Now, I want to tell you a little secret.

Everybody around you is doing a credit check on your

life every moment of your life. Not just the banks,

but everybody around you is constantly doing a credit check

on you. Are you what you say you are? Are

you the real deal? Are you just some phony Bologna.

You wear a mask here and wear a mask over here.

You know, That's what they used to do in the

Greek theater. One actor would play many parts, and he'd

come out and he'd wear a mask, and he'd play

a part, and they'd go back behind the stage. This

is the days of Plato. He'd get another mask. He'd

come out and he'd wear that mask, and he'd play

a part and he'd go back. And so he's wearing

he's being different roles to different groups of people, playing

different parts. Same guy, but wearing different masks. And the

word for that guy in Greek is called a hippocretos.

That's where we get the word hypocrite. Hypocrite means somebody

who he acts this way on the golf course and

this way with his kids, and this way at church,

and that way with his wife, and you don't really know.

Is what you see? What you get? He's saying, you

know the kind of person Timothy was. He proved, he

was checked out, he got a credit reference done. Now,

if you're going to be happy, you got to learn

to be consistent. You got to learn to be dependable, trustworthy, reliable.

How do you develop a reputation for reliability. Two things.

Write them down. The Bible tells us number one, live

with integrity. Live with integrity. And what I mean by

that is make sure that my actions match my words.

I don't talk a good game and then live another

different way. No, he says, what you see is what

you get. Integrity doesn't mean you're perfect. If perfection was

required for integrity, none of us have integrity because nobody's perfect.

We're all flawed. But integrity means what you see is

what you get. It's the real deal. Make sure my

actions match my words. Pubbers twenty five thirteen says this,

reliable friends who do what they say are like a

cool drink, or like cool drinks and sweltering heat refreshing,

not a great verse. So that's the you know, can

people count on you? Or do you flip flop? Are

you two faced? You're wishy washy, look at the opposite.

Proverbs twenty five nineteen says this, Putting confidence in an

unreliable person is like chewing with a toothache or walking

on a broken foot. I like that, what as you say?

The greatest stability is dependability. It's more important than the

other ability in life. The greatest ability is dependability. Are

you dependable? Are you credit worthy? Are you worthy of trust?

If you are, then you're going to be a happy

person because the more people who trust in you, the

more happy you're going to be. The greatest ability is dependability.

Proverbs twenty eight to twenty says, honest people will lead

a full, happy life. You want to be happy. Honest

people lead full every life. Number two. Not only do

I live with integrity, I keep my promises.

Thank you for listening to Pastor Rick's Daily Hope. Hey,

did you know that most people look for happiness in

all the wrong places. You won't find it through money, fame,

or power. You'll only find real, lasting happiness by following

God's commands. And that's why Rick created the Habits of

Happiness Bible study. You'll discover how happiness runs deeper than

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with biblical truths, scripture, practical lessons, application exercises, and prayers

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will help you experience the bibal habits that lead to

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