Inside out Leadership - January 26, 2025

Turn your Bible to Mark chapter number seven.

If you want to take notes on our Bible app, you go to the App Store and just type in Victory Baptist Church, San Diego, Lakeside, right in there.

It should pop up.

And you can take notes, share the notes.

There's a Bible reading plan on there.

There's a way to connect in our small groups, and hopefully that'll be a great blessing to you.

You know, this message really forms and shapes the philosophy of my whole life.

Inside out leadership.

Before I go and take care of you, I must take care of me.

Before I go and try to help everybody else's house, I must have my own house in order.

How many of you guys have known anybody that it's their full-time job to go to everybody else's house and every other business and look at all their other lives and point their finger at everybody else's problems?

And then you look at their own life and it's all messed up.

And I look at Jesus and I see in this passage how he defends his disciples.

And I notice through Jesus' leadership and his philosophy, is it's an inside-out way of life, meaning I'm going to take care of my walk with God in my heart, make sure my spiritual, mental, emotional health, and well-being is good with God on the inside, and then I'm going to take care of my family, and then I'm going to go and I'm going to minister to others from that standpoint.

And so if you're tempted often to go around and try to fix everybody else's issues, I want to encourage you, take care of you first.

Take care of you first.

Because you're going to have a whole lot more credibility and trustworthiness if you learn how to walk with God and stay clean on the inside for you first.

And so take a look at Jesus here.

Mark chapter 7, it says this in verse number 1.

Mark 7 · chapter mention

Then came together unto him the Pharisees, these are religious people, and certain of the scribes which came from Jerusalem.

And when they saw some of his disciples eat bread with defiled, that is to say, with unwashing hands, they found fault.

They found fault.

You ever known people like that?

They're fault finders, they're nitpickers, they're people that are only concerned about their image and making everybody else conform to whatever tradition they think is correct.

That's the Pharisees.

And they found fault.

And I want to hear, I want to tell you this today.

If you're looking to find fault with the church here, you're going to find it.

You're going to find it.

Everywhere you go, you're going to find fault.

Why?

Because it's you.

It's on the inside of you.

You're filled with fault.

All of us are filled with fault.

And that's why we need the grace of God.

That's why we need the mercy of God and the forgiveness of God.

And so these come to Jesus and they found fault with the disciples because they weren't washing the way that the elders told them to.

And it says in verse 4, and when they come from the market, except they wash, they eat not.

And many other things there be which they have received to hold, as the washing of cups and pots and brazen vessels and of tables.

So they're not keeping these laws.

And these Pharisees notice the disciples not doing it.

They're upset.

It'd be akin to somebody coming to our church, and everybody's not wearing a certain outfit, and there's certain instruments, and they're not doing this, and they didn't do this.

Fault finders.

Or somebody coming to your house and uh nitpicking over things that they do at their house, but you don't do it at your house.

They're just looking for problems.

And they're looking down on others.

Verse 5 Then the Pharisees and scribes asked him, Why walk not thy disciples according to the tradition of the elders, but eat bread with unwashing hands?

Hey, why are they not washing?

Why aren't they doing what the elders taught us to do?

Why aren't they keeping the religious rules?

And Jesus quotes an Old Testament prophet, Isaiah, here, and he says, he answered and said unto them, Well hath Isaiah prophesied of you, hypocrites.

And remember what a hypocrite is.

It's an actor, it's somebody who's two-faced.

They behave one way in public and different in private.

They're putting on a show.

And he says, You guys are hypocrites.

And that's what Isaiah said, as it is written, This people honoreth me with their lips, but their heart is far from me.

Howbeit in vain, futile, emptiness, do they worship me?

Teaching for doctrines the commandments of men.

For laying aside the commandment of God, ye hold the tradition of men, as the washing of pots and cups, and many other such things, such like things ye do.

Question.

Is Jesus, you know, just backing down from their questioning?

No.

He basically just said, listen, you guys are a bunch of hypocrites.

It was prophesied that you would be hypocrites.

Like you only care about religion and tradition, and you don't really care about these disciples.

And oh, by the way, when you're talking about God, it's not because you love God.

You only care what the brethren think, what your religious elite think.

You don't really care what the Bible says.

And so, Jesus, this is what I love about his leadership.

You want to talk about courage?

You want to talk about faith?

You want to talk about like rebelling against the institution of wickedness?

It's Jesus Christ.

And he keeps going.

He says this in verse 9.

He says, full well ye reject the commandment of God that ye may keep your own tradition.

You know, there's a lot of churches that reject the commandment of God in order to keep their tradition.

There's a lot of families, they reject the commandment of God to keep their family tradition.

Which one's greater?

God?

God and his commandments or the tradition of your family?

It shouldn't be God and his word.

Amen?

But we're all going to be confronted with these truths when your family and your friends compete against what the word of God says.

And then we're going to find out who's the Lord of your life.

Are you the Lord?

Is your family the Lord?

Or is the word of God Lord?

It's easy to say it, it's a whole nother to live it.

And Jesus is calling him out on this.

And he says in verse 10, For Moses said, Honor thy father and thy mother, and whoso curseth father and mother, let him die the death.

But you say, if a man shall say to his father and mother, it is Corbin, that is to say, a gift, by whatsoever thou mightest be profited by me, he shall be free.

And ye suffer him no more to do aught for his father or his mother, making the word of God none effect through your tradition, which ye have delivered, and many such like things ye do.

It's basically saying you're supposed to honor your father and mother.

But what you're doing is you're you're usurping the word of God and you're just doing what the traditions say over what the word of God says, because you're dedicated to the temple.

Listen, just because you come to Victory Baptist Church doesn't mean that you don't need to be honorable to your parents.

Amen.

It's not, well, I went to church, so therefore I don't have to love you.

No, no, no.

You're putting these two things in the wrong place, pitting them against each other.

And what he's doing here is he's saying, you're elevating your own traditions over what God tells you to do.

And I want to remind you, the scripture does tell us if a man doesn't take care of his own house, he's worse than an infidel.

That's a command.

You've got to take care of your home, you've got to take care of your family, you've got to take care of your walk with God, you've got to take care of your heart.

Listen, you can't take care of anybody else's heart.

You've got to take care of your own heart.

Take care of your own walk.

Obey what God tells you to do.

How many of you guys have ever frustrated yourself because you got so focused on somebody else and what they're not doing and how they won't follow God and do right with their heart?

And you got yourself in a little tizzy, and before you know it, you're so focused on them, you're not even thinking about God anymore.

And then you're finding Bible verses to slam them.

No, no, no, no.

You need to back up and make sure your heart's right with God.

And so here he's, Jesus is penetrating their hypocrisy, and he's saying you're making the word of God of none effect because of your tradition.

Verse 14, and when he had called all the people, so now he was just speaking to the Pharisees, now he's going to call all the people, and he says this hearken unto me, every one of you, and understand.

I want to teach you guys something.

Come on in, come on in.

I want to teach you guys something.

There is nothing from without a man that entering into him can defile him.

But the things which come out of him, those are they that defile the man.

Here's what he's doing.

He's basically refuting this concept that you can become holy through outward washing.

Listen, just because you get baptized in that water doesn't make you holy.

Holiness comes from the Holy Spirit on the inside.

And so he's basically saying, nothing from without a man is going to defile him.

It happens all on the inside of you.

It's inside-out leadership.

He goes on to say this in verse 16.

If a man have ears to hear, let him hear.

He's like, hey, who wants to hear this?

Because not everybody wants to hear what God has to say.

Who wants to understand spiritual leadership?

Who wants to understand the heart of God?

He goes further, he says this.

And when he was entered into the house from the people, his disciples asked him concerning the parable.

So they're like, okay, can you explain that to me a little bit more?

So we went from the Pharisees' issue to gathering the people to now meeting with his disciples.

And out of all those groups, you should want to be a disciple, a disciplined follower of Christ.

Somebody who comes and asks questions and has closeness with God and is willing to change their life and be edified.

The Bible goes on to say he's in the house with them.

And he says this in 18.

And he saith unto them, Are ye so without understanding also?

You guys don't understand?

Do ye not perceive a whatsoever thing from without entereth into the man, it cannot defile him?

Because it entereth not into his heart, but into the belly, and goeth out into the draught, purging all meats?

What he's saying is, what you eat and what you drink is not what's going to defile you.

You know, you have some people sometimes who are like, well, you shouldn't eat this and you shouldn't eat drink that.

You're not a Christian if you don't do this or do that.

And while what you do put in your mouth may impact your physical health and may have an impact on your walk with the Lord, really, what decides what you eat and what you drink?

Out of the abundance of the heart, the man thinketh.

Out of the abundance of the heart and the thoughts come the behavior.

And so if you're struggling in your life, it has everything to do with the heart problem.

The problem with the heart is the heart of the problem.

And that's why if you're dealing with people all the time and they're always dealing with the outward stuff, clothes, music, dress, food, and all this other stuff, and they're quoting all these different Bible verses, and they're not, they fail to get to the root of the problem.

You do not get saved by stopping drinking alcohol.

You do not get saved by quitting drugs.

You do not get saved by putting on a certain outfit of your clothes.

You get saved by the blood of Jesus Christ and by his righteousness and his holiness because you couldn't save yourself, and he came for you, and he loved you and did for you what you could not do for yourself.

That's the gospel of grace.

And you received him gladly, and he transformed you from the inside out.

He gave you a new nature and a new hope and a new calling and a new identity.

And so Jesus is now speaking to his disciples and he's teaching them.

That's why, listen, sometimes when you guys come to me with your problems, I know it's my job to counsel and be a blessing, but many times I always go, I wonder if they read their Bible and prayed today.

I wonder if they're so focused on the outward and controlling everybody else and they forgot that they had to get their own heart right with God.

Because many times people come to me because they want me to fix somebody else when they haven't been fixed.

I want to come get counsel from you, but I don't want you to tell me that I'm wrong.

Well, then don't come get counsel from me.

Like, if you don't factor your own self in the equation that you could be wrong, then I don't know how to help you.

Because it's a heart issue.

And Jesus goes on to say this to his disciples in verse 20 that which cometh out of the man, that defileth the man.

What do you mean, what comes out of me?

Okay, well, look what he says, verse 21.

For from within, out of the heart of man, proceed evil thoughts.

Adulteries, fornications, murders, thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness.

All these evil things come from within and defile the man.

So if you want to fix the world, who do you really need to fix?

You gotta fix yourself.

Really?

It's me?

Yep, you're the problem.

Really?

Yes, you.

I don't like that.

I don't care.

When are you gonna finally look in the mirror and stop blaming everybody else and realize that you can't control and make everybody do what you want them to do?

And stop throwing your temper tantrums and icing people out and being absent and being too aggressive.

Like, stop kicking against the pricks of what God's trying to do in your life.

See, God doesn't want to just solve your your outward problem, He wants to fix your inward problem.

And that means we've got to penetrate to the deepest part of your core.

This is inside-out leadership.

See, a lot of times people want a band-aid.

Just give me a band-aid.

Just give me the quick fix.

Just put a little makeup on it.

Just put it just a little cover-up.

No, no, no.

Listen.

We're gonna deal with this same relationship issue again.

This is why people go from church to church, relationship to relationship, because they never deal at the heart of the matter.

You gotta get at the heart of it, the root of it.

And Jesus is teaching inside out leadership.

You say, what are you getting at, preacher?

What I'm getting at is you gotta make sure you're right with God first.

I'll show you a few other scriptures before I give you some notes, okay?

You guys go with more Bible?

Jesus teaches this same thought over and over again.

Look over at Matthew chapter 7.

Matthew 7 · chapter mention

Matthew chapter 7.

Matthew 7 · chapter mention

And look what it says in verse number 1.

And don't worry, I'm not mad at you.

I'm just intensely focused.

And I really do want to help you.

But I can only help you as far as you're willing to receive help.

Matthew chapter 7, verse 1, it says, judge not that ye be not judged, for with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged, and with what measure ye meet, it shall be measured to you again.

Matthew 7:1

You've heard the thought, reap what ye sow.

Right?

And he says, verse 3, and why?

Why?

Everybody say, Why?

Why beholdest thou the moat that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?

So he's like, You're looking at a splinter, a toothpick in your brother or sister's eye, but you have a big old log in your own eye.

And when you have a big log in your own eye, a big telephone pole in your own eye, listen, you don't see things clearly.

And so what is Jesus' counsel?

Well, take care of yourself first.

Look what he says in verse number four.

Uh keep going.

It says, Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, let me pull out the moat out of thine eye, but behold, a beam is in thine own eye.

Verse number five.

Thou, what's the word?

Well, it seems to me like Jesus sure is calling a lot of people hypocrites.

Oh, that's not the Jesus I've made up in my mind.

Love, love, love.

That's your problem.

You made up a false Jesus.

You've made up a fake God in your own image, and you're picking and choosing what you what you'll accept and what you reject.

Jesus just penetrates through it.

See, Jesus doesn't need our likeness.

We need his likeness.

And the sooner we can stop wanting to get the likability from everybody else and start wanting to get the likability from God, the holier we're going to become.

And so Jesus says, Here's what I want you to do.

He says, verse 5, thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye.

And then thou shalt see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.

First take care of you.

First deal with your sins.

First deal with your financial issues.

First deal with your health issues.

First deal with your church issues.

First deal with your home life issues.

First deal with your nation issues.

Hey, wouldn't it have been good over the last four years if we were to take care of business at home here in America before sending billions and billions of dollars over to another country?

Yeah.

Yeah.

And the same is true.

We can sit there and get upset over the last administration all we want.

But how about you?

How about your family?

How about what you're doing with your finances and your health and your relationship and your cabinet?

Oh, man, you're really getting into my house now.

That's the only way you're going to see meaningful, long-lasting change.

Because it's easy to point the finger at some other organization or some other team or some other church.

Well, I don't like the way the pastor does it in the church.

Okay, well, let's look at your home.

Let's find out how you're doing.

How are your relationships?

How are you doing with prayer?

How are you doing with your fiscal responsibility?

How are you doing with all these little things?

Because it's easy to find fault in all these other places.

Why?

Because it absolves you from personal responsibility because you could do nothing about it.

But if you step back and say, what can I do?

How is my treatment to my spouse, to my children?

How is my health?

How's my diet?

How's my exercise?

How am I doing in these areas?

Am I being responsible?

See, Jesus has pull the beam out of your own eye.

Then you're going to be a lot more effective in what you're doing.

You say, is that the only place we see this inside-out leadership?

No, no.

Take a look at what he says over in Matthew 23.

Matthew 23.

I love Jesus.

How many of y'all love Jesus?

I just love him.

Listen, I'll take a spanking by Jesus any day over a promotion from the devil.

I don't need the devil come along and tell me all these sweet things.

I'd rather have Jesus tell me a straight up truth that fixes my life than me go along with the devil and just keep ruining my life.

You know how many of you you're ruining your life?

Because you're just going with the flow.

You just want to hear nice things and you just you um you think, well, you know what, I don't need to make any changes, and God's happy with me, and and I don't, I, you know, I'm I'm just gonna just let all these issues just stay.

No, no, no, no.

Better for you to take a good look at the issues that you're facing and and realize Jesus wants you to confront them.

For those of you, how many of y'all have a hard time with confrontation?

Yeah.

If you have a hard time with confrontation, that means you lack courage.

Another way to put it is you are cowardly.

Now I'm not down on you.

I'm just saying, if you're cowardly and you lack courage, we need to be like that.

Who was that?

And the the was it the lion that didn't have the courage?

He had to get a heart.

You've got to ask for it.

God, give me courage.

Give me heart, help me to step into things, help me to communicate.

See, Jesus wants us to look at it so we can confront it, so we can conquer it.

And you will not conquer what you fail to confront.

You will not dominate what you don't declare war on.

You've got to declare war on your sins and your issues if you're gonna see him help you.

But as long as you're just pretending it's okay, you're gonna stay stuck.

And so look what he says in Matthew 23.

You guys doing okay?

It's quiet in here today.

I'm still gonna sleep in this real peacefully this afternoon with the rain.

But hopefully a few of you will get some help.

That'd be a blessing.

Matthew 23.

Everybody take a big deep breath.

Another one, another one.

Get some oxygen in there, breathe.

Look what Jesus says here.

He's talking to the Pharisees.

Matthew 23, verse 25.

Matthew 23:25

Whoa.

Unto you, scribes and Pharisees.

What's the next word again?

Sure does use that word a lot.

Hypocrites.

How many of you have found this to be true?

Some of the biggest hypocrites are in church.

But you know, hypocrites are everywhere.

They're at the gym, they're at home, they're at work, they're everywhere.

Why?

Because we're human, it's human nature.

You always want to put your best face forward, but and then you don't always share everything inside your heart.

And so he says, Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, for you make clean.

Now look at the issue, look at the fault, look at the problem.

For ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within they are full of extortion and excess.

Thou blind Pharisee, cleanse.

What's the next word?

What's the word?

So it's an order of priority.

Don't miss this.

If you don't learn how to prioritize in your life, you will constantly be walking around as a failure.

You have to learn how to prioritize.

What is first, what's second, what's third, what's fourth?

He says, Thou blind Pharisee, cleanse first that which is where?

Within the cup and platter, that the outside of them may be clean also.

It's interesting.

He says, Stop focusing on all of your outward stuff.

Hey, listen, some of you guys, you come to church, you want to look good.

You want to act like your marriage is good, you want to act like your kids are good, but privately you're fighting.

Privately, you're manipulating.

Privately, you're extorting.

Privately, it's it's gluttony and it's excess and it's debauchery.

And it's just like you think that you're fooling somebody.

You're not.

You're not fooling anybody.

Like, seriously, don't come here trying to put up a good front for me.

I'm not worth it.

The people next to you, you don't put up a good front just for them.

Better for you to say, you know what, I'm done trying to play this image game.

I would much rather, if I'm having an issue at home, if I'm having an issue with my finances, if I'm having an issue with my family, if I'm having an issue at work, I'm going to have the courage and the grace and listen, the wisdom to deal with it.

And admit I'm at fault when I'm at fault.

And call somebody else on the carpet if they're at fault.

With the heart and motivation of reconciliation.

But as long as you keep sweeping it under the rug and just saying everything's fine, everything's fine, I don't have a fault, I don't have a problem, here's what you're doing.

You're putting a bunch of outward image stuff trying to act like you're good when you're not good.

How many of y'all know what I'm talking about?

And then you put all this weight on yourself trying to put up a front in front of other people when you know inside it's a house of cards.

It's a house of cards.

Listen, what good is it if you look good in front of everybody and then one big trial comes and then your family drip to smithereens?

That's why Jesus said, listen, you want to be blessed?

Build the foundation on the rock.

Do what I say and watch what happens in your life.

It's inside-out leadership.

So the goal of this message is pretty simple.

Get clean on the inside, keep God's word in your heart, live in obedience and followship to Jesus, help others.

It's all about taking care of the inside.

See, if we get you help on the inside, all the outside stuff's gonna flow.

Like if you learn how to like make sure you have forgiveness on the inside, you're gonna be a lot more loving to your spouse, to your kids.

You're gonna be a lot more engaged.

You're gonna be a lot sweeter.

When the problems and the trials come, you're just gonna go back to doing what Jesus wants you to do.

So I want to ask you a question.

What is coming out of your heart?

Not the image that you're putting up.

What's coming out of your heart?

Is it manipulation, greed, lust, anger?

What is it?

And if it is those things, let's deal with it.

Let's get the help we need.

Are you more focused on the commands of men or the word of God?

Are you a people pleaser or a Jesus follower?

Stop focusing so much on your food and start focusing more on the word of God.

Stop focusing on religion and tradition and start focusing on relationship and truth.

Stop nitpicking everyone else and start examining yourself.

So I'm going to give you this how to be an inside-out servant leader.

This is how to do it.

Write this down.

Number one, don't fall into the religious traps.

That's not the right one.

You guys just listen to me, don't look at them.

I got my notes right.

They didn't do their job.

Number one.

Don't fall into the religious traps.

Don't do it.

Don't you go do things just to make church people happy.

Don't you go do things just to look good in front of other people.

Make sure that when you do something, it's what the Word of God says.

Amen.

It's a lot easier for you to please one than to please everyone else.

That's how I can get up here and preach the way I'm preaching to you and not be at all bothered if you don't like me.

Because I know I'm doing right in my father's eyes.

I'm not gonna listen, you are not my boss.

I get to serve you, but I work for him.

That gives me liberty that if you don't like this, it's okay.

Listen, the little child doesn't like it when daddy gives a spanking or when daddy chases, or when mama takes away the cell phone or the car, or whatever it is.

They're less concerned about you liking them and more concerned with you doing right.

Number two, write this down.

Keep your heart clean and right with God.

It is a full-time job for you to keep your own heart clean.

Listen, when's the last time, look up here?

When's the last time you said, God, it's me?

My heart is wicked?

Like I have greed, I have lust, I have pride.

When's the last time, listen, honestly, when's the last time you openly confess that in prayer?

You know how many times I'll pray with people and they come up with these flowery prayers of nice things, but never once do I ever hear come out of their mouth from their lips, God forgive me because of these faults.

And I'll tell you why.

It's the same reason we put up the highlight reel on our social media of all our successes.

Because we don't want people to think bad about us.

But here's the issue it's not a sign of maturity when you're posting all of your successes.

It's a sign of insecurity.

Because you want everybody to only see the best side of you.

But the problem with that is this you're not admitting your weaknesses and your insecurities, your failures, your fumbles, your human side, the fact that you need grace.

And so the sign of a mature Christian leader is that they can say, Lord, forgive me.

Hey, my bad.

That's my mistake.

I own that.

I didn't write.

Hey, women up here, look up here real quick, ladies.

When's the last time you admitted to your husband, I'm sorry, I was wrong?

I see some looks on ladies' faces right now.

What about the men?

I'm focused on you for a minute.

And I don't, I know it goes both ways, but listen, it's a sign of your maturity when you say, hey, this came out of my heart and I was wrong.

I was off.

You say, why would I do that?

Because you want closeness with him more than you want to see, have, you know, safe face with others.

I would much rather admit my fault and my mistake in your eyes and be right with God.

So let me ask you this.

When's the last time you said, hey, you know what?

I was wrong, God, please forgive me.

Keep short sin accounts with God.

Listen, how are you gonna feel?

How do you feel when you do admit fault?

And you do say, hey, you know what?

I was absent-minded, I didn't engage, I didn't communicate back.

I said I was gonna do the job and I didn't do it.

When you start admitting all those things, hey, I was I was weak, I was insecure, I didn't do this, please forgive me.

How do you think you're gonna feel when you clear all that junk out of your system?

Yeah, way relieved.

You know, now you don't have to carry this facade any longer.

And so keep your heart clean with God and right with God means you're gonna be honest and authentic.

Number three, how to be an inside-out leader.

Protect yourself, your family, and your disciples from image strongholds.

From image strongholds.

You know, we're as humans, we're always trying to keep up with everyone else and wanting to look good in front of everybody else, and it causes us to fall into traps.

How many of y'all have kids and sometimes they when they don't measure up, they're trying to please somebody else, and you have to kind of like walk them through it.

Let them know it's okay for them to be authentically them.

You know, I think about this in our church.

In a growing church, you're not gonna be able to make everything.

That's okay.

But listen, I'm more concerned in pleasing God than pleasing you.

And you should be more concerned in pleasing God than pleasing me.

And you have a biblical responsibility to take care of your family.

And so when you start feeling like, oh, I gotta keep up, I gotta make the pastor happy, I gotta make the boss happy, I gotta make all these people happy, and then in doing so, you neglect dating your spouse, you neglect uh having one-on-one time with your children, you neglect taking having fiscal responsibility at home.

What you're doing is you're falling into an image stronghold.

You're trying to look good.

You're just trying to look good.

What's better, looking good or being good?

And so when that happens, you want to step back and you want to say, you know what, son, daughter, family, um, we're gonna protect ourselves from from these strongholds.

And here's how this plays out.

Well, they're doing this over at this church, and well, she's doing this over here.

You have to be able to say, you know what, son, wife, daughter, husband, good for them, but that's not our home.

We're not gonna fall into the traps of trying to please everybody else and keep up with everyone else.

We're gonna protect ourselves.

Just because they have Christmas this way and they have church this way, and they're buying this, and they're going there, and they're doing this, listen, that's not us.

This is how we do it.

We're not gonna fall into the trap of everybody else.

Come on, am I not talking to anybody out there?

Where do you feel that pressure all the time?

You have to be able to step back and say no.

Just because they're doing it doesn't mean we're gonna do it.

And you have to have enough strength and courage and fortitude on the inside of you to say no.

I don't have to go to every appointment and do every opportunity.

We're gonna do right by God.

That's how you protect the inside.

Because some of you, you're so overwhelmed with everything on the outside, it's coming in and it's just destroying you.

Because you're saying yes to everything and everyone when you need to back up and say, no, no, no, no.

And there's times you have to be able to say, you know what, son, you know what, daughter, not our jurisdiction.

That's not my home.

It doesn't belong to me.

Well, they're doing this and they're doing that.

Not my jurisdiction.

I have my jurisdiction, I have what I have to take care of, and this is what God gave to me.

I'm not gonna fall into the trap and the stronghold of others, and let me encourage you, don't you fall into that trap either.

Now you're really empowering your family and your disciples.

Number four, speak the truth in love and be a grace giver.

Tell the truth and just give people grace.

People are gonna have all kinds of faults out there.

You just be a truth seeker, a spirit follower, a grace giver, and a character leader.

Just be the person that says, you know what, we're gonna speak the truth and we're just gonna give people grace.

I can't control everybody else, but this is what we're gonna do because this is what God wants us to do.

Number five, and I'll be finished.

Move on to liberate more people and build high-quality relationships in Christ.

You're gonna have some people you can't work with.

Like, for example, there's some of you in here today, you're not, this isn't your vibe, you're not getting this.

That's okay, God bless you.

I encourage you to go somewhere else.

Like, it's not it's not gonna change anything for me.

Like, and there's gonna be some people in your life that they're not gonna listen.

They don't want what you have.

They're gonna go on ruining their life, getting into gossip and gluttony and drama and issues, and you have a choice to make.

Are you going to make your security and identity based on their acceptance, or are you gonna be moving forward with your life and saying, you know what, God's with me, I'm gonna go find some people that I actually can't help?

And I can tell you, your life is gonna be a whole lot better if you don't let the people who do not want to change and won't receive the gospel of grace, if you just leave them to God and you just keep walking forward with Him and letting Him lead you to who will be who will receive the help.

You say, Well, what if it's somebody in my family?

What if I have a vow on my life, I'm married to this person?

What if I'm they're my children?

What if they're my family members?

You're saying I gotta take care of my family first, but yet my family won't listen.

Again, this gets back into what does God want you to do?

You can still operate with a spouse, a son, and a daughter with giving the truth in love and not allow them to taint and control your spirit.

Remember, he that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down without walls.

Which means I can't let their lack of faithfulness, their lack of desire for God, their lack of reception cause me to lose my mind.

See, the reason you start getting frustrated and angry is because they're not doing what you say.

So you're you're giving your identity and your power over to them.

Let me say this to you.

Your power is not contingent upon whether or not they receive and accept what you're saying.

You already have your identity in Christ.

You already have liberty in Christ.

Now, what you do is you offer it freely to them who will take it.

Now, as let's say you hit a wall and they're not receiving it.

That's not the time to beat them up and throw them down and say, you know, I'm getting rid of you.

That's the time to be, Lord Jesus.

How do I control my attitude, my spirit when I'm working with people who don't want to receive this?

And here's what Jesus will begin to do: He'll begin to teach you how to love people at the season and pace of life that they're at.

Now, instead of you demonizing them and criticizing them and casting shade on them, you're gonna be able to say, Thank you, Jesus, for showing me where they're at and then teaching me to be more like you.

How would you like me to proceed forward with this person?

Now, what you're doing is you're listening.

And the Holy Spirit will guide you with the Word of God each day as you're reading it, and He'll pray for them, leave them alone for a little bit, you keep growing in Christ, come back and love on them, see how they're doing.

Right?

Oh, they're not, they don't want any more, they received a little bit.

Great.

Leave them for a little bit, go do your thing, come back as the Lord leads.

And the frequency and duration of time that you're working with that vessel is determined not by you and not by me, but it's by his lordship.

Because only his lordship knows what's happening inside that person's heart.

So at one moment they may be hard, at the next moment they went through a trial, and they're going to be a little softer.

This is why you just don't throw away people because they're not listening to you.

What you do is you commit them to God and let God teach you how much to work with them, but at the same time, you don't let your whole life be sabotaged and manipulated and monopolized by this hard-hearted or ignorant or weak person.

You maintain your strength and your power with God and you love him unconditionally, but then you keep growing in your walk with God.

See, your walk with God is not held down.

Thank you, Lord.

Your walk with God is not held down by anybody.

You're not waiting on anybody else to change for God to bless you more.

I don't know who needs to hear that right now.

Some of you all out there need to hear this, though.

You think that you're waiting on somebody else to come into your life for your walk to walk with God to advance.

You do not need anybody else to come into your life for your walk with God to advance.

Whether you're single or married or have kids or anything, you're with God, friend.

And some of you guys, you were thinking, oh man, I'm I'm I'm hitched.

I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm chained to this person.

No, no.

No, no.

You're with God.

He's gonna navigate you.

God can bring somebody in, God can bring somebody out, but you're whole already in Christ.

Now all of a sudden, you're not gonna demonize and hate on that person anymore because now you're not gonna think they're holding you back anymore.

If anything, you're gonna say, you know what?

Thank you.

Thank you.

You're teaching me something.

This trial, this circumstance, this person, God's actually using this person.

Listen to this, to advance me further.

See, that thing that you think is holding you back is actually stimulating you forward.

You remember with Joseph's brothers?

Was that holding him back or was it stimulating him forward with God?

What about the children of Israel in Egypt when the plague started coming and the darkness?

Was that holding them back or was it stimulating them forward?

See, when all of a sudden you start realizing that God is advancing you and it doesn't matter who's around you, who's with you, or for you, nothing's gonna separate you from his power.

All of a sudden you're like, this is great.

I'm so blessed, hallelujah.