Holy Love - August 30, 2026

This morning I got up early and around four in the morning I just started reading my Bible and saying, and I just said, God, what do you want me to preach on?

And he gave me this thought on holy love.

Holy love.

And I know there's a lot of people that come to church and and we we come to church and we want to be blessed and loved by God.

And there's three different types of love, right?

There's agape love where it's sacrificial, it's holy, it's right, it's good.

There's phaleo love, it's quid pro quo, it's a friendship love, and then there's erotic love, heroes love, where it's very sensual and selfish and pleasure uh-centered.

And what we want as Christians is we want agape love.

And here's with agape love, I will tell things to you that may offend you.

It may rebuke you, you may not like it.

But God says, as many as I love, I rebuke and I chase.

I gotta tell you the truth.

Like if you know if somebody has cancer and they don't get that cancer dealt with, they're gonna be dead soon.

Or if you know if somebody has a heart attack and they don't get that heart looked at, if you love them and you don't tell them, you don't really love them, you gotta tell them, hey, let's get this thing looked at.

If you know somebody's about to drive off a cliff because they're going too fast and there's a curve up ahead, and you say nothing at all, that's not love.

Love speaks up, love tells the truth.

Love says, listen, this is not about my feelings.

This is about I'm gonna put myself out there and give you an exhortation that hopefully will bless your life.

And what that means is there's some situations in our life where we have to have wisdom.

We gotta know, like, there's just some, like, I would call them common sense things, but they're not really common sense if you grew up in a broken home.

Like little things.

Like when you come to church, if if that woman is not your wife and that man is not your husband, don't be smooching on him and laying all over him.

That's not yours, that's ungodly.

Right?

Like, there should be some clear, like, I'm being an example to my children and to other people.

I've got to have some healthy boundaries in my life.

Well, if you just let people do whatever they want, you never speak up, they don't know.

Or if maybe you're sitting next to a loud talker, they're always talking and moving around in church and getting up and down and going to the bathroom.

And it's like eventually, if you love that person, be like, hey, can you sit down and be quiet?

Like, do you know you're being a distraction right now?

Seriously, stop sipping your drink every 20 seconds and going, or like, hey, you know the service starts at 10:30?

You're always here at 1040.

You're always a distraction.

Like, get your butt in the seat before the church service starts, and don't leave until the service is over.

These are small things, but they send a message to all the people around you.

Yes?

And if you love somebody, you tell them the truth.

It's the same thing if you have a teenager and they're going to an event and they look like a schlup, they look like a slug, they look like somebody who doesn't care.

Maybe they have a uh a tank top on and it's a and it's a colored shirt event.

If you love that son, you say, get your butt in there, go change your shirt.

You're not going in a in a in a wife beer over to this like business casual event.

Change your clothes.

Have some respect for yourself and this family.

Right?

Well, nowadays, because everybody's so easily offended, we we don't even speak the truth anymore in the name of love.

And when you don't speak the truth in the name of love, that is not love and it is not truth.

And so, what this means is if we're gonna be a holy people, we've got to tell the truth.

And we've got to do it with love and with kindness and grace.

And so the big idea with this message is biblical love is compassionate without compromising the truth.

We pursue the wandering sheep that go astray, we restore the repentant, we correct the disorderly, and we protect the church and the family.

See, if we don't know the truth and we're just love, love, love, you'll mess up your world, and then you'll fall into the trap of the sin of empathy, where you're so empathetic you got rid of truth altogether.

And then people will victimize that and use that as a tool against you.

And so what that means is we've got to know the Bible.

We've got to know the scriptures.

Are you guys ready to get in the Bible?

Come on, I can't hear you.

Are you ready to get in the Bible?

Okay, let's get into it.

Matthew chapter number 18.

Matthew chapter number 18.

And I was reading this this morning, and I noticed that Jesus says, I'm actually gonna pick it up in verse number 10.

Matthew 18, verse number 10.

It says, take heed, like be careful, cautious, like alarm, take a look, make sure you're aware.

That ye despise not one of these little ones.

For I say unto you that in heaven their angels do you always behold the face of my father which is in heaven.

You all know that there's some guardian angels around.

And you need to be careful how you treat people.

You can't just cuss people out and abuse people and use people and and and and and think, well, we can we can just do whatever we want.

Nowadays we have the the crazy uh communist socialists just think it's okay to murder babies.

That's a sin.

We have we have leftist supposed Christians that think that homosexuality is okay just because the culture is for it.

That's a sin, Romans chapter 1.

Romans 1 · chapter mention

And so when you start offending people and you're just killing babies, and you're just, well, you know what, I love him or I love her, and I'm gonna live in sin, and people just gotta take it.

No, listen, you're offending people.

And you need to be careful if you're using your liberty as a license to sin.

That's not grace.

Grace is not a license for you to do whatever you want.

Grace gives you the power to deny sin and to say, no, I'm not gonna live ungodly, I'm not gonna live hellish, I'm gonna live pure, I'm gonna live holy, I'm gonna live for the glory of God.

Please, God, fill me and strengthen me to live righteously and holy in this wicked and perverse world.

I don't want to hurt people, I don't want to offend people with my with my sinfulness.

And so Jesus says this.

He says in verse 11, for the Son of Man has come to save that which was lost.

How many of you are thankful that Jesus came to save you?

Man, I'm glad he came way down for me.

I'm glad he came for me.

I was I was lost, dead in trespasses and sins.

And I am like Paul, the chiefest of sinners.

But listen, that's my old nature.

It was nailed to the cross.

I have a new nature, I'm a new man.

My heart has been circumcised, if you would.

And I have I have Christ and He has me.

I'm glad to be saved.

I don't want to walk in the old nature.

I want to walk in the new nature.

And so it says here, Jesus come to save people that are lost.

Then he gives this example.

How think ye if a man have a hundred sheep and one of them gone astray, doth not, doth he not leave the ninety and nine and goeth into the mountains and seeketh that which was gone astray.

Right?

If you had a hundred sheep and you lost one, you'd go find that one.

You'd say, Hey, 99, you stay here, I gotta go find the lost wandering sheep.

And he says this, and if so be that he findeth, verily I say unto you, he rejoiceth more of that one sheep than of the 90 and nine which went not astray.

Even so does not the will of your father which is in heaven that one of these little ones should perish.

Listen, it's God, it's not God's heart for anybody to die and go to hell.

But that does not mean that people will not burn in hell.

Hell is real.

Hell is a real place, weeping and gnashing of teeth, eternal damnation and judgment.

Jesus died, so you wouldn't have to go to hell.

And it's not his heart, he doesn't take delight in sending people to hell.

But if you reject God, if you don't repent, you're making your choice to reject him, and he doesn't force you to be with him.

And so when you look here, he says, My heart is to is to seek the lost and to and to leave the 90 and 9 and to go after the one, and when I find the one, I rejoice and I'm exceeding glad.

Then he gives this this portion in the Bible about when people sin against you.

And so if you're taking notes, number one, we need with this holy love to pursue the wandering.

Number one, pursue the wandering.

There are, how many have some family members that have gone astray?

They've wandered away from church, maybe they've gotten into drugs, maybe they've gotten into alcohol, maybe they've gotten into pornography, maybe they started shacking up, maybe they have cohabitation, they say they're Christians, but they don't go to church, they don't love God, they don't keep his commandments, and they wander away.

They wander away.

Listen, as Christians, it's our job to seek them, to love them, to care for them, to shepherd them back to Christ.

It says he leaves the 90 and 9 and goes after the one.

Don't quickly discard struggling people.

Pursue them with compassion.

Listen, you've sinned and somebody came for you, right?

You've cussed somebody out, you've probably said evil things and done evil things, you've probably got into some iniquity.

And how many are glad that not everybody knows your mental and emotional sins?

Praise the Lord.

Praise God for that, right?

Like people don't know every all the crazy stuff that we think and feel.

But listen, when people fall into sin and they go astray, that's not the time to throw rocks at them.

That's the time to say, Hey, I love you.

Come on.

The Bible says this.

There's a better way.

Let's not live in the destruction of Satan.

Let's not live in in drunkenness and debauchery.

Let's not live in reviling people.

This is gonna destroy you.

Come on back.

God loves you.

That's the heart of a Christian.

It's for reconciliation unto the truth.

Love goes after people.

Right?

No, no, stay with me.

Because there are some people in here that you're pursuing people that don't want you.

They don't want your love, they don't want your time, they don't want your talents, they don't want what you have.

Listen, I have a sister who's a tweaker on the streets, and she has been for 30-something years.

She does not want God, she does not want Christianity, she does not want certain things.

If I give everything I have, it's still not gonna change her heart.

She has to choose it.

How many all know you've you've worked with some drug addicts and alcoholics before?

You can't make them do something they don't want to do.

And so, yes, we need to pursue the wandering.

But number two, we need to correct the sinning.

See, what good is it if you pursue the wanderer and they stay stuck in their evil and their wickedness, and then you bring them into your home only so they can mess up your home and mess up your life group and mess up your church and mess up everything.

And you're just aiding and abetting a little terrorist.

You're allowing a squatter who gives no cares about you to have free rent and roam inside your mind, inside your family, inside your church.

You know what the Bible calls these?

Look in your Bible, hold your hand here, we're coming back to it.

Go in your Bible to the book of Jude.

The book of Jude.

Isn't the Bible so good?

Man, I love this Bible.

It's so good.

It's quick and powerful, sharper than any two-edged sword.

I delight in his precepts.

Look what he says in Jude.

This is the Acts of the Apostates.

This is people who went A-WOL, they went sideline, they fell out by the way and they went after sin.

Jude 11.

Jude 11.

There's no chapters, there's only one chapter.

Jude verse 11, it says this.

It says, Woe unto them that have gone in the way of Cain.

Well, what did Cain do?

Remember, Cain killed Abel.

Why did Cain kill Abel?

Because Cain's heart was wicked and evil.

Cain brought an offering to God and God said, No, I don't want it.

I don't want that offering.

You know, God doesn't have to receive your worship, He doesn't have to receive your offering.

In fact, the only offering he receives is the blood of Jesus Christ.

Amen.

What can wash away our sin?

Nothing but the blood of Christ.

This is why we're not saved by our own righteousness.

We're saved by his imputed righteousness.

That's why when you come boldly in prayer, you're coming boldly to the throne of grace through the blood of Jesus Christ.

It's not yourself, it's not your works, it's not your religion, it's not your baptism, it's not your money.

And so it says there are some people they went the way of Cain.

Well, he got a bitter heart because his offering was rejected.

He was jealous and he killed Abel.

Right?

And so we see there's some that go after the Cain and they ran greedily after the heir of Balaam for reward.

Hey, you know there's some Christians out there that are just in Christianity for money?

They don't care about God, they don't, they won't sacrifice.

If you if you ask them, hey, would you would you help with this?

Would you do this?

Would you be a servant?

No, no, no.

Why?

Because it's all about themselves.

All they were here for is money and success.

And so it says there are some they ran after the heir of Balaam for reward and perished in the gainsaying of Korah.

You know what Korah did?

In the Bible, Korah basically lifted up himself and said, I don't like the pastor.

I don't like that he's trying to call the shots.

We're men of renown.

There's 250 of us.

Let's come against him.

You remember what Moses did?

He said, Fine, I didn't call myself, I didn't put myself here.

God put me here.

And if you're gonna go ahead and rise up with division and discord and cause all kinds of problems, go ahead, bring your censor.

We'll both come with some censors, and we're gonna see who God listens to.

We're gonna see who's walking with God and who's living in sin.

And sure enough, they come out and Korah raises it and he gets smoked, he gets taken out, the earth opens up and swallows him up.

Here's what I'm saying to you: there are people in our life that we love and they're a part of what we're doing, but their heart is not right with God.

And they they will perish in the game, saying of Korah, it says this in verse 12 these are spots in your feast of charity.

You know, we just heard a wonderful message at 9 a.m.

by Pastor Vaught about the life-giving table and loving people and feeding people and taking care of people and taking them out to eat, having hospitality, and leaving a chair open and paying their bill and praying for them.

Fantastic, fantastic, fantastic.

We do that because we're Christians, right?

We're not doing it to get something out of it, we're doing it because God gave us everything and we want to share it with others.

Well, here it says, it says there are some people that we bring in to our church, our family, our business, and they are suckers and takers and leeches and squatters.

They're abusers, they're revilers.

And if you don't get enough wisdom and common sense that these people are inside your family, inside your kingdom, inside your church, it's high time that you kick them out.

Yeah, yeah.

You need to understand it's a privilege to be in church, it's a privilege to be in America, it's a privilege to have a business, it's a privilege, and every privilege has a responsibility to it.

You don't get to just do it and say whatever you want.

You have a responsibility to the truth.

And people that are weak and wimpy and have no backbone and have a need to be needed, and just well, I want everybody.

Then what happens is you open your heart and life to the Trojan horse of evil, cynicism, sarcasm, wickedness, and you let them in and they destroy your family and destroy your home and destroy your kingdom, all because, in the name of love, love, love.

It's a problem.

Listen, I love my family, I loved my dad, but listen, my dad, when he was a when he was still living, he couldn't come and be with my children.

He was a pedophile, he did evil things to little children, and so I had to make a choice.

I choose righteousness and love and protecting my home at the detriment and the pain of my own heart.

But my loyalty is not first and foremost to my biological father, it's to my spiritual father.

And sometimes, sometimes we let the spots in our feast of charity in the name of love, love, love, and they have not repented, and they show no remorse, and they are takers in leeches, and they're squatters.

And then you wonder why your life is harder and why it hurts.

It's because all you had was one side of Christianity.

Love, love, love with no truth.

And it says, these people, their spots in your feast of charity when they feast with you.

Oh yeah, they'll gladly take your food.

Oh yeah, they'll gladly take your spouse.

Oh yeah, they'll gladly take your son or your daughter.

They'll gladly sleep with them and and and and get drunk with them.

Oh yeah.

You say, What do you know, preacher?

I know a lot.

I know a lot watching families who have no borders, no boundaries, no protections.

Before you know it, she's shacking up and having a baby out of wedlock.

Before you know it, he's over here with somebody else he shouldn't be.

And it's because they were ignorant and gullible and naive.

Come on.

Amen.

Come on.

And it says there are spots in your feast of charity when they feast with you, feeding themselves without fear.

No respect for God.

Listen, when I went to church and I was dating my wife, I would feel ashamed if I was smooching on my girlfriend in front of the whole church.

That's not my wife yet.

And I would be double ashamed if the whole church found out I was living with her.

Good night.

Have you no respect for God?

And then you wonder why your adult children and other people give you no authority.

Because you have compromised your authority.

There's no credibility there.

You have basically said, I can't deny myself until I get things right with God.

So I'm gonna have my sin and I'm gonna have you too.

You're not gonna be blessed by God that way.

See, he says they feast with you without fear.

They don't respect God.

And he says this, he goes on to say, they're clouds, they are without water.

Meaning they look good, but they have no substance.

He says they're carried about with winds, trees whose fruit withereth without fruit, twice dead, plucked up by the roots.

Basically, they look fruitful, but they have it's fake, it's phony, it's it's not real fruit.

There's no love, there's no joy, there's no peace, there's no gentleness.

And they're carried about with every emotional thing that's coming along.

There's no sticking power, there's no stability, there's no denial of self.

And he says this raging waves of the sea, foaming out their own shame, wandering stars to whom is the reserve of the blackness of darkness forever.

Here's my point.

Like, yes, we need to pursue people, we need to love people, but we need to be very, very careful that you don't let some naive, gullible, ignorant Christians who don't know the Bible get up and say, you know what, we need to love everybody, we need to uh love all of our neighbors and just close our eyes to their sinfulness.

Oh, the people in Mexico, the people in Canada, the people in Africa, yeah, I love them all, but they're listening some of them are rapists and killers.

And if you close your eyes in the name of love, they will take everything from you.

So you can't be naive and gullible in this thing.

You can love your neighbor and say, no, I'm gonna love you like I love myself, and I tell myself no all the time.

No, you can't have this, no, you can't buy that, no, you can't eat this.

Why?

Because in order to stay in the law of love, I must deny myself.

And in order to keep you in the law of love from taking advantage of everything, I must tell you no as well.

Woo! Come on, I'm getting a little hot up here.

I want to show you a verse that a lot of times people completely mess up.

They twist it and rest it out of scripture and they think, well, you know what?

Where two or three are gathered together, I guess this is our church.

And you don't even understand the context.

It's the same thing like Philippians 4:13.

Philippians 4:13

I can do all things through Christ, which strengthens me, means I can dunk a basketball and hit a home run and do whatever I want.

That's not the context.

Paul was in prison.

He says, I know how to be abased, I know how to abound, I know how to be full, I know how to be hungry.

He's basically saying, in whatever state or condition I am, I can go through it with Christ.

But when you don't know the context, you just rest the scripture, and before you know it, you're messing yourself and everybody else up.

So look at Matthew chapter 18.

Matthew 18 · chapter mention

Once again.

He says you leave the 90 and 9 and go after the one because they're the angels beholding the face of their father and how he delights in bringing people to himself.

Yes, yes, God's building his church, he doesn't want anybody to perish.

Then he talks about, okay, preacher, um, what about if there's issues?

What if my brother or my sister trespasses against me?

Question Has anybody punked you or wronged you lately?

Has anybody dished you?

Has anybody hurt you?

Listen, it's gonna happen.

It's gonna happen.

And so here's what he says in verse 15.

Moreover, if thy brother trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone.

It didn't say share it on social media, it didn't say blast him.

Go privately and have some courage and some grace to tell him, hey, this is where you what you said and what you did, a sin of omission or the sin of commission, and I want to get this right.

I'm not trying to beat you down over it, but I want to address the issue so it doesn't keep happening.

And so he goes on to say, but if he will not hear thee, because by the way, sometimes in church, when you bring up an issue with somebody, they take it personal.

And then because people are so weak and don't understand the scripture and don't have maturity and don't have stability, their weakness and their insecurity causes them, whenever they get rebuked or reproofed or to be corrected, they merge their identity with the feedback of their wrongdoing, and now what they do is they say, Oh, you're rejecting me, so I'm leaving.

It's a problem, it's an emotional, mental, spiritual immaturity problem where we don't know how to receive feedback, and we we basically say, Well, I'm gonna take my ball and go home because I don't know how to repent when I did wrong.

I don't know how to be corrected.

And so what he says here is if if you go and tell him his fault, and it says in verse 16, but if he will not hear thee.

Then take with thee one or two more.

Then in the mouth of two or three witnesses, every may be established every word may be established.

Here's what he's saying.

Let's say I got a problem with you, but you're not listening.

Then I'm supposed to bring my brother.

Hey, can you come help me?

Man, just he's a typical guy like us.

Maybe you can get through, we can get through together with him, right?

And so we're supposed to go together.

The heart is reconciliation, open up the understanding, help the feedback come in with the law of love and respect and help them to see the breach so that the whole the devil doesn't mess up his world and mess up the relationship.

So you're supposed to safeguard that relationship with good wise counselors.

Well, what if he's not going to listen?

Because by the way, just because you bring one or two or the pastor or whoever doesn't mean that that person has to listen.

They have their own heart, their own mind, their own emotions.

They can choose whatever they want to do.

And it says this, it says in verse uh number 17, and if he shall neglect to hear the hear them, tell it to the church.

But if he neglect to hear the church, tell uh let him be uh unto thee as a heathen man and as a publican.

He basically says, okay, if after you took one and then you took another, and then you tell it to the church and the guy's still not listening, or the girl's still not listening, they're living in debauchery, they're living in reviling, they're living in open sin, open shame, they don't give a rip.

He basically says, Well, you need to tell it to the church, and then after that, kick them out.

Did you hear it?

Let them be to thee as a heathen and a publican.

Meaning an unbeliever that does not prescribe or submit themselves to the lordship of Jesus Christ.

And here's the problem with the success mindset.

The success mindset absent from Christ goes after any paganism that makes it look better.

And so what now we have the power of positive thinking without the power of preaching the truth against sin.

And so here's what he says: if he doesn't hear thee, let him be to thee as a heathen man in public.

And what if it's your son?

What if it's your daughter?

What if it's an aunt or a relative?

What if it's something you've been discipling for a long time?

Yeah.

Then you have a choice.

Am I gonna do right by God or am I gonna chase this person around my whole life and let them pull me around like an anchor in the sea and just pull me down?

And this is why many times, if I see husbands and wives get into issues and maybe the husband's not gonna listen, or maybe the wife's not gonna listen, listen, I can't fix the marriage.

You can't fix that marriage.

They have to recover themselves out of the snare of the devil.

I can preach, I can pray, I can guide, but ultimately, if that person wants to live as a heathen, as a publican, and wants to destroy their life and destroy their home and destroy their future, that's up to them.

And so he goes on to say this in verse 18.

Verily I say unto you, whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.

Now I know our Pentecostal friends would like to use the binding and loosing here to say you can just say whatever you want in prayer in Jesus' name and it's bound and it's loose, and you get whatever you want.

That's inappropriate, inaccurate, it's not in the context.

The context is bringing sanctions and judicial spiritual judgment upon somebody in the church that's living in sin and is not going to listen.

That's the context.

Then he goes on to say this in 19 Again I say unto you, that if two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done of for my uh of for them of my Father which is in heaven.

For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.

Okay, so the context is not just, oh well, I decided to leave church and I'm out worshiping Jesus in nature, and we're out on a hike or out on the beach, and there's two of us here, so Jesus is in the middle.

This is my church.

That's not accurate.

You don't just get to make up stuff because you saw one verse in the Bible.

The context is about order, it's about purity, it's about dealing with issues inside the church.

It's about holy love, and it's about this concept that if you're bringing an issue with somebody who's trespassed against you and they are not listening to it, maybe they're gonna live in sin, live in fornication, live in drunkenness, live in debauchery, live as a reviler, maybe live as an abuser.

Then by the way, if you're being abused in here, let me know.

Because I do not take lightly to people getting abused.

Not at all, not physically, not verbally, not emotionally, not financially.

No.

I don't care if it's a pastor, I don't care if it's a husband, I don't care if it's a wife.

Listen, I've seen some things.

I just watched a show the other day on Netflix called The Pastor's Wife.

And this pastor was out of his ever-loving mind, a complete psychopath.

Abused and used and reviled and hurt and harmed and dismissed his real wife and took some other man's wife, and then got some other girls.

And I was like, oh man, my blood was pumping.

I just wanted to come through and just see the harm done to these people because somebody in their position thought, well, I'm the pastor.

No, no, no.

Listen, the pastor's authority is only limited and confined to the precepts of the Bible, to love people, to care for people, to pray for people.

It doesn't give you the permission to use and abuse and harm people.

No, it's the same thing in the home.

Well, I'm the husband.

Okay, so you're you being a husband means you can be a jerk to your wife.

You can mistreat her and talk bad about her and revile her and disobey the commands of loving your wife and sacrificing and making sure that she's washed and cleansed and purified and cared for.

No.

You don't use your position to dominate and berate people.

That's ridiculous.

And on the flip side, I've seen it with wives too, where a wife has gone absolutely crazy and she's abusing and using her husband and reviling him and writing him down and up down, and she thinks, well, I'm righteous.

No.

The wrath of man and the wrath of woman doesn't work the righteousness of God.

So when you're reviling, you're actually being a tool in the hands of Satan.

Slandering and verbally abusing and tearing down.

I've seen cases where the wife was beating the husband, hitting him, slapping him, doing all kinds of things, not just verbal, not just physical, financial.

When that stuff happens, don't use the Bible as a weapon to hurt people and say, well, the Bible says this.

That's a devil.

That's a devil.

Devils do that.

You can always tell a devil because they don't care about people.

They'll use them, they'll abuse them, they'll spit them out, they don't give a rip.

But as Christians, we're supposed to understand, okay, yes, we need to seek and to save that which is lost.

We need to love everybody, right?

But there are rules to this thing.

There's boundaries, there's a straight and narrow way.

You don't get just do whatever you want.

There's righteousness and holiness and purity, and you have to learn to deny yourself and deny your fleshly feelings and to do right by God.

You can't just do what everybody else is doing.

Well, everybody's drinking, while everybody's watching pornography, while everybody's mistreating their spouses, while everybody's not going to church, while everybody's not going to small groups, while everybody's not tithing.

I don't care what everybody else is not doing.

I want to do what God tells us to do.

And so they'll use this verse.

Well, well, two or three are gathered together.

There am I in the midst.

When two or three who are operating in righteousness in a biblical context, under the authority of the local New Testament church, with the scripture guiding them and the Holy Spirit helping them, when they make a judgment on a person to bind or to loose, that's as if God is saying, That's my divine authority on earth, and I am answering that and I am blessing that.

That's the context.

That's the context.

So next time somebody tries to rest the scriptures and get you to think it means something else so that you're not going to church or so you're not doing whatever, and just because you're praying together, listen, you won't be so easily deceived.

You know how many people they start dating somebody, and just because the guy puts a little scripture on a social media profile, all of a sudden, well, oh, you know, he's a Christian.

Really?

Really?

Well, I'm gonna get married right away.

You have no idea who this guy is.

You have no idea.

It took, what, three years to find out who Judas was?

And nowadays, well, I love him.

No, you lust him.

You lust the idea of what it's gonna be like to be married.

Let me just pop your bubble here.

It's gonna be sucky.

Right?

They're gonna stink and they're gonna want things, and it's gonna be hard.

And your love is gonna be tested, not when you're in this emotional high moment, but when you have nothing left to give.

And you need the Holy Spirit to help you to be gracious and humble and to not run when everybody else runs.

Or how about this?

It's I need to correct my spouse.

She's not, she's not, she's not holding up to her end.

I need to correct my husband.

He's not holding up.

He's he's dismissive, he's absent, he's always on the phone, she doesn't care about me, she's always talking to other people, she's not adoring me.

Uh I I uh and whatever it is, you have to be willing to lean in and say, listen, I'm fighting for this marriage, I'm fighting for this home, I'm fighting for this church.

I'm fighting for this nation.

And that does not mean being tolerant of every stinking thing that people want to do inside your home and your family.

Amen?

And so we need to be willing to correct people.

You know, I was reading my Bible.

How many of y'all do a proverb a day?

Anybody do a proverb a day?

A proverb a day keeps the foolishness away, at least I hope it does.

But look, look, look at some of the Proverbs I found today.

Go over, what's today?

Today's the 29th?

Oh, today's the 30th.

But I think I did 29 and 30.

Go, go, let's go to Proverbs 29.

I want you to see this.

Y'all doing well?

I'm gonna take a little drink here and recover just a little bit more energy.

Y'all don't have anything more important going on than this today, do you?

Nothing else more important than God, right?

Getting our hearts right.

Hey, listen, just this one message could save your future.

That's right.

Could save your marriage, could save you from flesh and wickedness and defilement, could actually help you to get right, to do right, to speak right, and to live right.

Just one good message can change your world.

Proverbs 29, are y'all there?

I know the sound boo's saying, What verse, preacher?

I don't know yet.

We'll get there.

Proverbs 29.

Okay, look at this, look at this.

Verse 15, verse 15.

Proverbs 29, 15.

The rod and reproof gives wisdom.

That means this: if you love your kids, you need to spank your kids.

But it's not just, it's not for physical abuse, it's for mental and emotional correction.

But notice it's not just physical and reproof, it's verbal.

Hey, this is what you did wrong.

You I told you to clean your room and you didn't clean your room.

I told you to do your homework and you didn't do your homework.

So give me your phone now.

You're gonna go on time out over here.

The rod and reproof.

Listen, let me tell you something.

If you do not correct your children, you do not love your children.

Come on, you don't love them.

And you wonder, you look at some families and they wonder, why is my kid going crazy?

Listen, my wife and I, my wife loves these crazy uh true crime shows.

She loves true crime.

We watched this one yesterday.

Uh it was called The Crash.

And uh we watched The Crash, by the way, uh referral from uh Tommy and Talon.

Well, this thing is crazy.

These parents were letting their kids smoke pot nonstop, and the daughter, she was all into herself.

She was she was smoking pot while she was driving, she was throwing up the bird, she didn't care about things.

Uh the dad was a pothead, the mom was just really kind of delusional and just didn't really see how to correct their children.

Well, what happens when you don't correct your children?

You don't love your children, you raise little monsters.

And it may not be bad when they're like look like two, three, four years old because, oh, aren't they so cute?

But but yeah, maybe it's a little cute for you, but not for us who they're tearing up the church and tearing up the home and tearing up the family.

It just tells us that you have no law in your home.

Right?

And so we watch this and and we're watching this thing, and sure enough, this lady, she uh she's like 17 years old, and she uh she kills her boyfriend and his best friend because uh they uh they they had been out all night, and she and and all the studies showed that she never hit the brakes.

Right into a wall.

And and the detective put it all together and found out who she really was.

The way she talked about people, the way she she was vile to her boyfriend.

Let me tell you something.

If you're in a relationship, look up here right now.

If you're in a relationship where somebody is reviling you and abusive to you and narcissistic and gaslighting you and making you second guess yourself all the time, and you can't speak up, you are in a toxic relationship.

If you're afraid that they won't give you any liberty or any movement and you fear for your life, listen, you need to get help.

And it's not just male to female, sometimes it's female to male.

And so what happened was she basically was so like vicious to her boyfriend that he stayed with her.

And sure enough, she ended up killing him and the boyfriend.

And here's what I'm telling you: like, like, just because somebody's in close proximity to you, and just because you're in a relationship with somebody, doesn't mean that you stay in that relationship.

People change, people hide, people have all kinds of things that they go through, and this is why somebody asked me, Well, do you do you know, do you know who your daughter's gonna marry?

I said, Yeah, I love him.

He's awesome.

He loves Jesus, he cares for people.

How did you know?

I said, Listen, the Bible says this.

The Bible says, lay hands suddenly on no man.

Meaning, ladies in here who are single, don't you jump just because he's cute, just because he has a nice car.

Listen, you better wait and find out his character.

Because those looks become ugly when the spirit is nasty on the inside.

So you lay hands suddenly on no man, you check them, you do your due diligence, then you prove all things.

Find out do they keep their word, do they have character?

Will they be respectful to the dad, to your mom?

Will they open the door?

Will they treat you the right way?

Or are they just putting on a show?

Because anybody can have a great first date and put on a show.

Any pastor can get up and say wonderful things.

I care more what's the pastor doing privately, what's the deacons doing privately, what's that man doing privately, what's that woman doing privately?

Because there's a whole lot more hours that we spend outside the church than in the church.

Right?

And please understand, I'm not throwing any stones at anybody, but I am saying when you mess up and you have a character issue, fix it.

And if you keep compromising and covering it, you're not a person that we trust.

And so with with dating relationships, it's like, no, I love him because I've watched him, he's consistent, he's caring, he's loyal, he I I've watched him.

The Bible says this, it says, lay hands suddenly on no man, hold fast, it says prove all things, and then it says, hold fast to that which is good.

Meaning, good people, good things, high quality, high character, you bring them into you.

Now look up here.

If you're not a high quality, high character person and you're trying to bring a high quality, high character person into you, when they see your faults and your failures and you don't repent and you don't get things right, they're eventually gonna see that you're not real.

You're just you're just you're just a house of cards.

Which means this it's not about deceiving people.

It's not about, listen, if you're in here today, oh, I'm gonna go to church, I'm gonna get my whole life fixed.

No, no, you're not.

Your whole life will get fixed when you walk with Jesus and you repent and believe, repent and believe, repent and believe, and every single day you walk with Jesus.

And you learn how to be a godly person, and you fix your faults and you do right, and you stop making negotiation excuses for where you're off.

Amen.

So the scripture says the rod and reproof gives wisdom, but a child left to himself, what's it do?

Hey, you ever see you ever anybody watching the videos of these Democrat-run cities with Antifa and with uh uh everything going on?

I promise you, those are a lot of children.

The mother left that child to himself.

That boy didn't have a daddy.

I had a conversation with somebody the other day.

He got he got a girl knocked up, and and you know what the issue was?

No daddy.

No daddy, no respect, doesn't know how to carry himself, no job, not gonna be able to provide for her, not gonna happen.

Now, people can change, people can get right, people can get fixed things, but I'm telling you right now, a child left to himself, they grow up and they really mess up themselves.

Why?

Because little children need correction, right?

They need love, they need guidance.

But hey, listen, there's a better way.

This is really dumb what you're doing.

This is how you do it, this is how you be successful.

You don't just spend all of your money because you have money.

You're gonna need it for other things later.

You don't treat people this way.

Y'all getting what I'm saying?

A child left to himself has no wisdom.

The same thing with a church.

A church that doesn't have a pastor that loves them and teaches them and corrects them and guides them and tells them, hey, you shouldn't dress like this, hey, you shouldn't talk like that, hey, you shouldn't be living in this situation.

Hey, let's move towards this.

Hey, you should get that job.

Hey, you should clean your house, you should clean your car, hey, you should take your wife on a date.

You need those constant reminders from a shepherd.

From a shepherd that will shepherd you in righteousness.

And how many people just throw away their pastor, throw away their church?

Well, he said or did something I didn't like.

Okay, so he preached 10,000 good sermons, and he says one thing you don't like, and all of a sudden you're gonna throw that person in that church away?

Give me a break.

I see how it is.

It goes one way, but it doesn't go the other way.

I see it.

That's why when people ask me, uh, Pastor, you've been at this church for 16 years, how is it?

I said, I love my people.

I said, I love them, I love our church, I love it all, but let me tell you something.

They're gonna they're gonna love you one moment and they're gonna rip you up one side and down the other the next.

They'll praise you and then they're gonna be gone, they'll ghost you, they'll stonewall you.

You'll be there for the hardest moments when they lose a child or when they're in drug addiction, you'll recover them out of the snare of the devil, and then when their heart gets hard and they get strong, they'll dish you, they'll punk you, they'll talk bad about your wife, they'll they won't give, they'll be suckers and takers, and it's a test.

Do you still love them?

And if your love was conditioned based upon their performance, you won't.

But if your love was unconditional based upon the love of Jesus Christ, you're gonna stick and stay and go all the way.

Because it was never about their performance.

But I will tell you this when people show you who they are with how they're treating you or not treating you, you need to pay attention.

You need to pay very attention.

And look up here, don't make all the excuses for that person just because you love them.

We were watching another show the other day, and this lady, it was a true crime show, and um, she was a friend, and she was doing all the work for this psychopath.

And the psychopath, he was a cop.

Another position of authority.

That doesn't mean all pastors and cops are bad, amen.

It's like if you had a messed-up boyfriend, doesn't mean all men are bad, or messed up girlfriend doesn't mean all ladies are bad.

You have to have discernment to look through to find the character, right?

Well, this guy used his U.S.

Marshall badge and his computer to manipulate and abuse women.

And he actually got the LAPD to lock up his past girlfriend because she left him.

Because she found out he was a psychopath.

And he used that badge to basically, I'm just like you, LAPD, do what I say.

Well, as the story unfolds, this thing just gets crazier and crazier with all kinds of like Craigslist uh, you know, uh fantasies with different people.

And if you're just like, okay, what is wrong with this lady?

If he's trying to do some crazy, weird fantasy with people they don't know, how about just no and get out of there?

You know, but listen, people get sucked in.

Well, this this U.S.

Marshal had another friend that was doing all the dirty work for him, and she just thought, oh, he's a U.S.

Marshal.

Okay, just because somebody has a position of authority doesn't mean they're a good person.

Right?

Doesn't mean they're a good person.

Which means this, you have to always keep watch.

Long story short, you'll go watch it later if you want.

I don't know the name of it, but um, but there was somebody that found him out, that he was playing both these ladies, and they got all the records and found on his computer all this crazy stuff what he was doing.

And by the way, you need to be careful what you're doing on your computers.

Don't you send out sexting stuff and wicked stuff and post and think it's anonymous.

It's not.

It's not.

Like, seriously, you need to be very thoughtful because the devil will take all that stuff and mess your world up.

Your future jobs depend on it.

You know how they locked up the last girl?

They saw after she murdered those two boys, they they looked at her social media profile and she was dressed on Halloween as some crazed devil-looking thing, had no remorse or guilt.

When the judge saw that, she's like, throw that lady in the slammer.

Well, they they found out on that U.S.

Marshall, all the crazy stuff we're doing, they put it all together, they put that sucker behind bars.

You say, Man, preacher, I thought this was church today.

This is church, this is church.

We have in church today.

And we need this.

Your sons, your daughters, you need it.

Hey, listen, some of you have some parents that were crazy and they were into all kinds of evil things.

And just because you're getting you hear messages on honor your father and mother, you can honor them and still protect yourself.

Just because you're commanded to honor doesn't mean you're commanded to trust.

When somebody burns you over and over again, you do not just give your heart right back to that person for them to slam it again.

You have to measure out to find out have they really changed.

And then sequentially, as they show you if they have changed, then you enter in.

But if they're just there to use and abuse you, then it's your fault if you keep putting yourself in a toxic relationship.

Because you can blame that person all day long, or you can use a scripture that will pigeonhole you into that spot, and before you know it, you're landlocked into some bad situation because you didn't have the wisdom and discernment to realize there's another piece of of truth that you're not practicing.

And so you say, Well, what do you do, preacher, when uh when you're you're correcting the sin?

Correct the sin.

Now, are there some relationships?

I'm gonna go a little longer today.

Are you guys okay with that?

Okay.

Now, if you gotta go, you can go.

Nobody's holding you here.

The doors are unlocked.

Amen.

It's perfectly fine.

Um, I want to show you there's some people you gotta kick out of your life.

There's some friends, there's some family members, there's some people, they're not good for you.

They're very bad for you.

They're controlling, they're manipulative, they're narcissistic, they they they don't care about how you view them.

They just they just they're I'll put it this way, they're they're just squatters taking over your life.

Let me show you in the scripture.

Look at 1 Corinthians chapter 5.

1 Corinthians 5 · chapter mention

This is this is a crazy situation.

You ever look at our church and you think, man, this church is a little crazy, a little messed up.

Now, if you're here for the first time and you think, oh man, I love this pastor, I love this church good.

We love you too, but listen, there's a lot of weird people and messed up people around you.

There's one right here.

Now, listen, I'm not an open sin, I'm not trying to get in sin, I'm trying to live holy, but I'm not perfect.

Amen.

And when I sin, I'm I fess up, I'm gonna get it right right away.

I'm not gonna try to hurt myself or hurt other people.

There's a difference between living in open sin and not caring and having just a sin nature that needs to be corrected all the time.

Well, in 1 Corinthians chapter 5, it's there's a guy sleeping with his new dad's wife.

1 Corinthians 5 · chapter mention

So imagine your dad, your mom died, your dad got remarried, and everybody's in the church together.

You know, I've seen some crazy situations in church.

Crazy.

And it and listen, I'm all for restoration, the gospel, healing, forgiveness.

This is about to go deeper.

I hope you guys are ready for this.

1 Corinthians chapter 5, look what it says there.

1 Corinthians 5 · chapter mention

Here it says it He says to this church at Corinth in verse 1, 1 Corinthians 5, 1, it is reported commonly that there's fornication among you.

Fornication is when you have sex outside of marriage.

You're having sex with somebody who's not your partner.

And by the way, sex is supposed to be reserved for the marriage bed after you say I do, after you make a covenant that you're gonna love that person.

And so it says this: it says, and such fornication as is not much, uh, not so much is named among the Gentiles that one should have his father's wife.

So the dude's sleeping with his new dad's wife.

And ye are puffed up and have not rather mourned.

He basically says, and by the way, you're all happy about it.

Oh, look at my relationship.

Look at you're flaunting your sin.

It's like somebody who's having multiple babies saying, Look how wonderful my baby is.

There's no there's no husband.

It's like somebody bring coming to church and they're living in open homosexuality saying, Oh, look at our marriage.

That's not a marriage, that's called sin.

That's evil.

I don't care if your daddy or your sister or your brother or your aunt or your uncle is is in an alternate lifestyle, also known as a sodomite.

It's sin.

And I you and I do them no favor by saying, Well, you know what, let's let's be okay with it.

No, it's sin.

But here's what's happening: the same thing was happening in the church.

They were not mourning over their sin.

Sin should make you mourn.

Sin should make you go, oh man, I'm grieving God's heart.

I shouldn't have, I shouldn't have smoked that dope, I shouldn't have got drunk, I shouldn't have had sex outside of marriage, I shouldn't have reviled that person, I shouldn't have cussed.

I feel bad about this.

When you have a sensitive heart and a pure conscience toward God and you sin, it should bother you.

So much so that you go to get it right and you don't put yourself back in that situation again.

That's biblical repentance.

Well, they're they're puffed up about it.

They're like, oh, look, everything's fine, look at this.

And the scripture says this it says that he that hath done this deed might be taken away from among you.

He's basically saying, you need to put that guy out of the church.

Like that guy's hurting the church, he's hurting the family.

He says, Verily, I he says, for I verily, as absent in body but present in spirit, have judged already.

As though I were present concerning him that hath done this deed.

Now, I know what some of you are thinking.

Well, the Bible says, judge not that you be not judged.

Don't try to use a verse you don't understand.

You don't understand the context again.

You're not supposed to be walking around condemning people.

The Bible says, pull the beam out of your eye, then you can see clearly to help others.

1 Corinthians 2 says, the spiritual person judges all things.

See, if you use that, judge not that you be not judged, you will remain a complete idiotic Christian who does not make good uh judgments in their life.

Because you've removed your ability to have discernment.

And so he basically says, I've already judged the matter.

It's wrong.

Verse 3, he says, for I verily, verse 4, he goes on and says, This, in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, when ye are gathered together and my spirit with the power of our Lord Jesus Christ, to deliver such an one unto what's the word say?

What's the word say?

What's it say?

Say it again?

Okay, so he says, I want you to deliver that person to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that the spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus Christ.

He basically says, you need to stop protecting that person.

You need to deliver that person over to Satan.

You say, Well, I thought God loves all people.

Yes, one of the ways that God shows his love is He He puts people out who are in open rebellion.

It's the same thing if you have somebody from MS-13 and you're just like, well, just let them in our nation.

No, no, that's the most unloving thing you can do so they can go rape and pillage other people in our community.

No, the best thing you can do is apprehend that person and put them out or put them away or incarcerate them.

Because you do not do your family or your church any blessings at all by letting those people just roam around violating the love and the holiness inside your family or in your nation.

And so he says, Here's what I want you to do.

I want you to give that person over to Satan.

You say, Well, what's Satan gonna do with them?

Hopefully, they'll start feeling guilty, they'll start feeling shame, they'll start realizing, oh, I can't just do whatever I want in the church or in the family and get away with it.

These people actually have morals and conviction, and it's a privilege to be with them, and they don't need me as much as I need them.

And so you're letting, you're putting them out and you're putting them away with the heart motive of saying, I want them to get it.

Listen, when we were younger, my wife and I were younger, we had uh uh one of my siblings live with us.

And there were times we had to pack them up and say, get out.

There's times in the church when somebody's in the church, all of a sudden they're in debauchery and they're hurting and they won't repent.

Well, you you if they're not going to listen, like Matthew 18 says, you've got to be able to say, Listen, you're hurting this family.

You can't you can't do this to us.

And that's what's happening in the church.

This is called church discipline, and by the way, it's biblical.

And he says in verse 6, your glory is not good.

Know ye not that a little leaven leaveth the whole lump?

Basically says, if you keep this in, you keep gloring in your sin, it's gonna grow and grow and grow, and it's gonna get worse, it's gonna mess everything up.

This is what I see in families many times.

The dad's unloving, the mom's disrespectful, the kids don't get the correction and the love and the and the guidance they need, then those little hellions grow up and they're monsters.

They're monsters.

And before you know it, it's too late, the leaven has just polluted the whole thing.

It's the same thing in churches if you have a weak-willed, wimpy person that's a pastor or a leader who won't lovingly deal with the issues.

And by the way, I'm not saying be a jerk or be mean to people, but I am saying you have to have a backbone.

You have to be able to hold the line.

He says this in verse 7: purge out therefore the old leaven, that ye may be a new lump, as ye are unleavened, for even Christ, our Passover, is sacrificed for us.

Therefore, let us keep the feast, not with the old leaven, with the leaven of malice and wickedness, but with the unleavened bread of what's the next two two three words say?

There's such a thing as fake peace.

You know when you can't address an issue because you're too afraid it's gonna hurt that person, or you ever been in a relationship where you're having a tiptoe around the tulips or you're walking on eggshells?

Let me just remind you, you can't control anybody else's emotions.

You can't.

But what you can do is live godly and be spiritual and say, you know what?

I'm not gonna be in a church or in a family that or in a business that's gonna disrespect me and punk my family over and over again.

I'm just not going to.

I'm not gonna have myself treated that way, I'm not gonna have my family treated that way.

And by the way, when you start respecting yourself in a biblical way and honoring God, you teach your family how to respect themselves.

You you teach them how to speak up and and and to and to fight for righteousness in a good way.

So is is correcting sin a part of the process?

Yeah.

And and protecting the church family is part of the process.

So let me put it this way: sometimes we leave the 90 and 9 and go after the one, right?

But other times we put out the one in order to protect the 90 and 9.

You hear it?

Don't miss it.

Because if it's all about the one, the weak one, the weak one can weaponize their entitlement and their victim mindset and use it as a tool against the 90 and 9.

And then before you know it, you're compromising all your morals to get that one person back who is showing you all along who they really were.

Relationships are privileges, and they carry with them responsibilities.

We need to handle the conflicts wisely.

Number four, handle conflicts righteously.

I won't take the time to turn to all these other verses.

I could probably go another two or three hours, but I know your bellies are grumbling.

Believers should possess enough spiritual wisdom to deal with the problems biblically rather than pretending problems don't exist or handling them like the world.

Peace is not pretending there's no problem.

Truth without compassion becomes harsh.

Compassion without truth becomes compromise.

Look one other place in your Bible, 1 Corinthians 6.

Take a deep breath with me, too.

Take another one.

Take another one.

Look what he says here.

He says in verse number 18 of 1 Corinthians 6, flee fornication, every sin that a man doeth without the body, but he that committeth fornication sinneth against the body.

What know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, you're not your own?

For ye are bought with a price, therefore glorify God in your body and your spirit.

Question.

Can you get drunk?

Sure.

But isn't it a sin?

Yeah.

Can you have sex outside of marriage?

Yeah.

But is it a sin?

Yeah.

Can you cohabitate with somebody?

Yeah.

But would it violate the appearance of evil and send a mixed signal to those that you care about and want to lead to the gospel?

Yeah.

Can you go buy everything on credit cards and rack up all kinds of debt and put yourself and your children into slavery and bondage?

Sure.

It would be very unwise, though.

Look what he says in verse 12.

All things are lawful unto me, but all things are not expedient.

All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.

Just because you can do something doesn't mean that you should.

Right?

Just because when nobody's watching you privately, you can do this doesn't mean that you should.

A spiritually mature person says, God's watching me.

God's watching how I'm how I'm overseeing this family.

God's watching me, how I'm taking care of my body, God's watching my thoughts that I think towards people.

I'm gonna go a step further with you.

What if?

What if you went to somebody and you're having an issue with them?

And they they don't repent.

Are you supposed to forgive them?

Who says who says yes?

Who says no?

Luke 17, pull it up on the back.

Luke 17, verse 3.

Luke 17:3

I want you to see this.

And here's the problem with taking one verse and not the whole council of scripture.

Can you guys put that up?

Luke 17, I think it's verse 3.

Take heed to yourselves, if thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him.

And if he repent, forgive him.

And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day, turn again to thee, saying, I repent, thou shalt forgive him?

We can stop there.

Okay, so some people will take that verse and they'll say, If he repents, then I'll forgive.

Question, what happens to your heart if he or she does not ask for forgiveness?

Maybe they're using you, abusing you, harming you, they're not getting things right, and you've told them their fault, but they're not repenting.

What happens to you if you don't forgive them?

What happens to your heart?

Your heart gets hard.

You start quenching the Holy Spirit.

So now their sin becomes your sin because God's commanded you to be tender-hearted and forgiving.

Right?

Now here's where a lot of people make the mistake.

They think he or she is not repenting.

I can't forgive them because if I forgive them, they're gonna keep doing it over and over.

And here's what the problem is they think that when you forgive somebody, it means reconciliation.

See, forgiveness is for your heart.

Reconciliation takes two.

This is why you can be a godly Christian, pray for those who despitefully use you, forgive those who are hurting you, keep a sweet heart with Christ, but also listen, have boundaries and protections so that your heart is not being destroyed by putting yourself in toxic, harmful relationships over and over again.

Now you're forgiving them, but you're not trusting them because trust is earned.

And when they show that they've brought forth fruit meat for repentance, not just that they're sorry they got caught, but that they're truly sorry and they're working on things for themselves, not just to get you back, but because of who they are in the inside of them, then you can slowly begin to start trusting them when they're bringing forth fruit that's meet for repentance through the process of time.

But just because somebody says they're sorry, just because somebody says I'm gonna change, doesn't mean that you automatically give them your life again.

Should you always forgive them?

If you want to keep a tender heart with Christ, yeah.

Matthew 5, he says forgive.

And so, how many of you guys, question, how many of you guys have a relationship in the past that has been destroyed because of something they said and did, and you're struggling with it still.

And you've forgiven them, maybe some of you haven't forgiven them, that's your job today, forgive them for yourself and for God's sake, for your heart.

But look up here.

If somebody is acting like a heathen and a publican and hazardous to your health and your family and your future, don't you think for one second that you just need to drop everything and and roll out the red carpet for this malicious, horrendous, wicked person who is going to take everything from you.

It's not good for you, and it's not good for your family.

And so what you've got to be able to do is say, I forgive you, but I don't trust you.

And a lot of relationships, you have to live there.

And you have to be willing.

And a lot of times people think, Well, I need some closure.

Your closure is Christ.

It's not whether they say, I'm sorry, forgive me.

Your closure's always been, I'm doing everything that I do for Jesus.

And so if this person stonewalls me, if this person is trying to get in, not everybody gets level 10 access to your life, right?

Like, there's some people who just gotta be like, no, I just, every time I let you in, like, you haven't changed.

I love you, I'll pray for you, but like I just can't do that to myself, and I can't do that to my family.

You know where that puts us?

A really hard spot.

Right?

There's gonna be some relationship in your life.

You just totally want to have be reconciled and have peace once again.

But as long as you're chasing some vain happiness and it's not connected to the character of that person, you're gonna continue to compromise.

So you have to be willing to step back and say, you know what, Jesus, increase my faith.

Help me to live, even though I've been used and abused and pained and hurt, and I've had to go out, continue to go after the 90 and 9 and go after the one and have the wisdom on both.

Help me to keep a sweet heart.

At the same time, help me to protect my flock and protect my family.

And if somebody's got to go, help me to lovingly confront them and give them the opportunity they need and not just pretend that this it's gonna get better by me just being tolerant of things.

It takes a lot of wisdom and a lot of courage to be able to lean in and just say, hey, I want to have a conversation with you over this.

And and I can't control how you respond, but I do know this if if you choose that, I've got to choose this for myself and my family.

And you have to be willing, you have to be willing.

Tell them I'll talk to him later, okay?

You have to be willing, look up here.

You have to be willing to let them talk all kinds of crap about you.

You have to be willing to let them revile you, gaslight you, speak bad about you.

You have to be willing, because you can't control their emotions, you can't control their responses, and you can't control the narrative.

I want to remind you, you have a God that fights for you.

He fights for you.

So when you do correct somebody and then they ghost you or they get upset or they won't receive the correction, there's a high chance that that person is gonna go on living in hatred towards you and jealousy of you.

And it's because they can't control you.

Now don't fall into the same trap as them when they start speaking evil about you or trying to manipulate you to get you to go into their trap again.

Your best protection is to keep a forgiving heart and look up here.

Pray for them that God helps them.

God uses Satan or situations to break off the sin, break off the pride, break off the shame.

Because what you're trying to do is you're trying to separate that vessel that Jesus died for from the evil spirits that are hijacking that vessel.

And so by you realizing Jesus loved and bled and died for this person, and there's high, there's there's um there's squatters, spiritual squatters taking up residence inside their mind.

If you can separate those two, you can pray for that vessel to be broken so that they can see those the evil spirits left and their heart can be humble and they can come to Christ.

So your heart is still a heart of reconciliation, but it's still also a heart that I have a boundary up and I have a protection up, that I'm not gonna fall into their trap again.

Now here's what happens: your heart grows in wisdom.

And if those evil spirits use that vessel to launch judgments against you, you don't launch it back.

You basically say, Okay, God, thank you for growing me to be like you.

Please help them.

God, I give it to the higher court.

Vengeance is yours, Lord.

You said it's yours.

Please, God, you know I've been clean, you know I've been pure, you know I've done nothing but try to love and help, but God, I'm just trying to live in righteousness and holiness.

And I know that they have kind of a cane heart and a quora heart, and they're just they're living that way, and they can't control me.

And they're trying to get trying to get control of me, they're trying to get me to bite on it, but Lord, I don't want to.

I want to stay in holiness and purity.

I want you to save them and help them.

And so, God, do what you need to.

And so notice, you can keep doing work inside your heart, inside your mind to keep good treasure going on the inside of you while they're launching all kinds of spiritual attacks against you.

This is how you keep your heart in purity and in power.

This is how you purge situations and people out of your life, and this is how you love with holiness.

Can you see?

Can you see how this is, this is not, I went to church and I got one message about leaving the 90 and 9 and went after the one, and now I just go after the person who's using and abusing and defiling me all day long.

Can you see it?

It's the wisdom of knowing I'm also responsible for the 99.

And I've got to have this wisdom of balance with the love of God so that I'm not getting lopsided in my Christianity.

See, the devil hates this message because he knows if you get this, you become a better leader.

You become a better servant, a better dad, a better mom, a better son, a better daughter, a better business person.

And he won't be able to push you one way or another like he used to be able to, because you're you're armed with spiritual power.