Finding Love

The Bible reading today is from Proverbs 8.

On the heights beside the way, at the crossroad she takes her stand.

Beside the gates in front of the town, at the entrance of the portals she cries aloud,

To you, O men, I call, and my cry is to the children of man.

O simple ones, learn prudence. O fools, learn sense.

Hear, for I will speak noble things, and from my lips will come what is right,

for my mouth will utter truth. Wickedness is an abomination to my lips.

All the words of my mouth are righteous. There is nothing twisted or crooked in them.

They are straight, they are all straight to him who understands, and right to those who find knowledge.

Take my instruction instead of silver, and my knowledge rather than choice gold.

For wisdom is better than jewels, and all that you may desire cannot compare with her.

I, wisdom, dwell with prudence, and I find knowledge and discretion.

The fear of the Lord is hatred of evil.

Pride and arrogance and the way of evil and perverted speech I hate.

I have counsel and sound wisdom. I have insight. I have strength.

By me kings reign, and rulers decree what is just.

By me princes rule, and nobles, all who govern justly.

I love those who love me, and those who seek me diligently find me.

Riches and honor are with me, enduring wealth and righteousness.

My fruit is better than gold, even fine gold, and my yield than choice silver.

I walk in the way of righteousness, in the paths of justice, granting an inheritance to those who love me, and filling their treasuries.

The Lord possessed me at the beginning of his work, at the first of his acts of old.

Ages ago I was set up, at the first, before the beginning of the earth.

When there were no depths, I was brought forth.

When there were no springs abounding with water.

Before the mountains had been shaped, before the hills, I was brought forth.

Before he had made the earth with its fields, or the first of the dust of the world.

When he established the heavens, I was there.

When he drew a circle on the face of the deep.

When he made firm the skies above.

When he established the fountains of the deep.

When he assigned to the sea its limit, so that the waters might not transgress his command.

When he marked out the foundations of the earth.

Then I was beside him, like a master workman.

And I was daily his delight, rejoicing before him always.

Rejoicing in his inhabited world, and delighting in the children of man.

And now, O sons, listen to me.

Blessed are those who keep my ways.

Hear instruction and be wise, and do not neglect it.

Blessed is the one who listens to me.

Watching daily at my gates.

Waiting beside my doors.

For whoever finds me, finds life and obtains favor from the Lord.

But he who fails to find me, injures himself.

All who hate me, love death.

Good morning everyone.

If you want to open to Proverbs 8, and then we'll pray.

Please pray with me.

Our Father, we admit that our hearts chase after everything.

We find everything else appealing, besides your ways often.

So I pray that this morning that you would speak to us,

and that you would persuade each one of us that your ways are best.

Your ways are good, and bring us life.

That they are rich.

So please be with each one of us.

In Jesus' name.

Amen.

Well, yesterday a friend said some harsh words to you,

and you're now in the shower rehearsing those words that cut you deeply.

Lady Folly is shouting in one ear,

How dare he?

Does he even know me?

I wish I pointed out how much of a hypocrite he is.

But woman wisdom is in the other ear, calling out,

Is this really worth dwelling on?

Now, Proverbs 19, 11,

Good sense makes one slow to anger,

and it is to his glory to overlook an offence.

Can I just overlook this?

Lady Folly butts in.

Your pride is at stake.

Are you just going to let them walk all over you?

Are you going to take this lying down?

Defend yourself.

Woman wisdom calls you again.

Did he really intend to harm me?

Is there truth to his words?

Proverbs 27, 6.

Wounds from a friend can be trusted,

but an enemy multiplies kisses.

Lady Folly yells again.

Yes, he meant every word.

I don't know why he said it,

and I don't know how our relationship is going to get past this.

Here's a few things you can say to defend yourself next time.

You can get one up on him.

If the friendship blows up,

well, there obviously wasn't much of a friendship to begin with.

Woman wisdom offers a different way.

Okay.

Even if the words are untrue,

even inconsiderate,

remember Proverbs 15, 1.

A gentle answer turns away wrath,

but a harsh word stirs up anger.

And then you have breakfast,

and then you confront the next dilemma you've got to face in life.

Life is complicated, isn't it?

I find it is.

We have to make choices all day, every day.

Some are small.

Some have big consequences,

like the impact on our friendships,

our relationships.

The good news in Proverbs is

we're not left to ourselves

to navigate the complexities of life.

The book of Proverbs gives down-to-earth advice,

divine advice,

to help us live well.

So I've just tried to illustrate the theme of friendship,

but there's loads of Proverbs on our speech.

How many times have your words got you into trouble

and caused damage?

Words on speech,

Proverbs on work and laziness

and alcohol and sexuality and parenting

and children relating to parents and justice

and relating to those in authority.

So we've got help.

We've got help to navigate the complexities of life.

The bad news is,

at every turn,

we're confronted with competing voices,

both wanting us to give ourselves to them,

both presenting as the best way to live.

There's two fundamental paths we can take in every decision,

two women we can embrace.

Whether we're male or female,

reading Proverbs,

we take the position of a young man trying to work out their way in life.

We've got two women we can listen to and embrace.

Both want our heart's affections.

Both want to be our intimate companion through life.

As Marty helpfully explained to the kids,

it's lady folly and woman wisdom.

At every turn,

we can choose whether to fear the Lord

or to be a fool and turn away from him.

Now, I think sometimes I'm a bit dull.

When we use the term foolishness and wisdom,

they just seem like abstract terms in my mind.

What's actually,

what's the choice?

How would the original hearers in Israel from Solomon's day onwards,

how would they have heard this choice?

I think it'll help if we just pause and consider that

so that we understand what choice we're making.

I think a clue here is that both ladies are crying out

from the high places where God's temple or idols were worshipped.

And more broadly than that,

one results in destruction,

the other results in life and blessing.

To a Jewish person,

they would be thinking of Deuteronomy,

whether they are in covenant faithfulness with Yahweh

or choosing to worship idols.

In their case, Baal,

who offered fertility and life and blessing.

So the personification of these two women

really means the choice isn't an abstract one.

It's not just an ethical one.

It's a relationship.

Who are we going to give ourselves to?

Yahweh or Baal?

For the original audience.

Who do we think is going to give us life?

Whose love is best?

Who's going to enrich our life?

Are we going to be faithful to Yahweh

or are we going to commit spiritual adultery with idols?

Now, I've never been tempted to worship Baal.

I doubt any of you have.

But idols just have different faces today, don't they?

If you take any created thing

and you make it an ultimate thing,

you must have this thing to live.

You've made an idol.

I'm not sure who said it,

but someone described killing idols as like whack-a-mole.

You hit one and like two others pop up

and we're just idol factories.

I can't remember who described it though.

Calvin maybe.

I don't know.

Marty, you could tell me.

Yeah, Calvin.

Okay.

Our hearts are idol factories,

taking a created thing and making it,

I must have this to have life.

So whether that's food or power, success,

marriage, money, popularity, anything really.

At every turn, we're going to choose

between embracing the Lord and his ways

and what idols offer us.

We're on the search for love.

Whose love is best?

The Lord's or idols?

Who's going to love us?

Who do we think is going to give us the best life?

Who's going to enrich our life?

Whoever we think is, we're going to embrace them.

And we're making that choice all the time.

So in chapter 7, we've been warned

of the deceptive, seductive dangers of idols.

Now in chapter 8, we've got the positive side

of the argument.

We've got this grand display of all the reasons

why we should choose God's voice,

his wisdom, his ways.

Just before we get into it,

it struck me like,

why do we need nine chapters

to convince us to choose wisdom?

Like, why don't we just jump into chapter 10

and get all the wisdom about life?

Surely I want to be wise.

Am I ignorant?

Am I slow to learn?

Am I forgetful?

Or worse still, am I already convinced

that foolishness is better,

that idols are better?

I reckon it's all the above in my case.

We need to be convinced

that God's word is best.

And the paradox is,

you're only on the path to God's wisdom

when you first admit that you're a fool,

that we're already in love with idols.

We need to be convinced.

And that's what chapter 8 is about.

It's showing us,

look how beautiful wisdom is.

Look how much God's ways enrich your life.

So let's jump into it.

Here's why we should embrace woman wisdom.

Here's what she offers you.

Do you want to be a good person?

I don't think I've met anyone

who doesn't want to be a good person.

Do you want to be a good person?

Do you want to live a successful life?

Do you want to be rich?

Do you want to live in harmony

with how the world works,

in tune with the meaning of life?

Do you want a long and satisfying life?

Do you want to live in harmony with the truth?

That's what she offers us.

So let's take a look at these things.

Verses 1 to 5, if you have a look there.

The first great truth about God's wisdom

is that even though I'm a fool,

the gracious news is that woman wisdom is pursuing me.

it's it doesn't start with me pursuing God it starts with God pursuing me

if you look at those verses she is everywhere you go

in your daily life in Newcastle she is everywhere at every turn even in the shower

along the roads on your way to work on the way home common places public places she's not silent

foolishness is loud but she is calling out she's crying out at every turn and she's crying out to

every person verse 4 to you oh men I call and my cry is to the children of man even gullible and

simple-minded ignorant wayward people verse 5 she's calling out to us she's calling out she wants us

no one needs to remain a fool she's there with us all the time

so both in ancient times with ancient philosophy and I think in modern day too with intellectuals

of the world like Stephen Hawking sometimes they can claim like they've got the monopoly on

what life is about but wisdom is available to all God is saying in these verses whether educated or

not whether you're a brain on legs or not like God's wisdom wants to be found God wisdom is

available to all of us in fact consider who the Lord reveals the way of eternal life to in Matthew

11 25 Jesus prays this I thank you father Lord of heaven and earth that you've hidden these things

so eternal life from the wise and understanding and revealed them to little children yes father for

such was your gracious will wisdom is pursuing you she's available everywhere you go all day

you don't have to be wise and learn it you have to be a child and listen that's how you become wise

it's by a personal relationship with the Lord not by intellect that you find her

and because wisdom is pursuing you here's the guarantee in verse 17 those who seek me diligently find me

if you want her you will find her

you won't miss out she wants to be found

and if you want the company of truth in your life if you want the company of what is good and right

if you want to be prudent if you want discretion in making your choices

if you want to stay away from pride and arrogance twisted speech all that's evil

then one wisdom can introduce you to these things she is the way to be a good person

now I don't know about you but sometimes the righteous thing to do is just not obvious I find

some things are obvious other times it's really hard to work it out

there seems to be an emphasis in these verses on words and just reflecting on my own words like

knowing my own motives is really tricky like am I saying this thing to be honest or to gossip

to provide relevant information or to try and defend myself

am I saying this to give helpful advice or because I just need to be needed

wisdom helps us navigate these motives in our hearts helps us be wise in understanding them

we need her to do that we need to listen to her to do that

and we've got we've got to decide where the character and virtue is more valuable than what money can offer

she claims in verse 11 all that you may desire cannot compare with her

we can become virtuous by her we just need to listen to her so she is the way to be a good person and

the flip side is even though she's better than all that you can desire including riches

she then is the key to success in riches

verse 14 to 21 wisdom isn't just head knowledge it's it's really practical it's how to live well

we need her counsel to make the right plan we need

sound judgment to be resourceful we need her power her boldness to actually carry out the plan

for it to be successful if you don't have those things your plans will just flop

let me give you an example of a plan flopping

the other day when leaving the house very simple activity I thought I'm going to leave the house

I'm going to lock the door when I return I'll open the door and enter

that did not happen I looked at the bunch of keys it had my car key had a bunch of keys

okay I've got the house key I'll leave I come back home and my purple house key isn't on the ring

I couldn't get in I've forgotten and I've given that purple key to a visitor the previous week

now that is a very simple situation in life but I need wisdom for my plans to be successful

we need wisdom every step of the way

success depends entirely on her any success in our life is due to her

so the connection to riches becomes obvious then if if she's the key to success then that's gonna result

give results in financial terms that's gonna bring wealth so I think you see it in the salvation army

movement um in England when it started up they just focused on serving the poor and giving them the gospel

here's the thing though the gospel turn these people into like reliable hard-working diligent people who

then became middle class it actually resulted in well-being she is the key to success and and riches

and the same applies to leadership kings and princes whether they recognize it as god's wisdom or not

if they have any success it's because of her it's because of her

but even for them it's not the main goal isn't the wealth

we need to get our head around this the main goal isn't the wealth

kings and princes don't need wisdom for their own personal advantage they need it to execute justice

to bring out peace in society that's the real riches they need it for

the key here is verse 19 my fruit is better than gold

so the results I give you is better than money better than fine gold my yield than choice silver

so Tim Keller to kind of help help me understand this hopefully the way I say it can help you

success although wisdom brings about success success isn't what a wise person is aiming for

primarily they hope to get success but it's not the primary goal so success whether relationally or

financially is just a byproduct a wise person seeks something more than riches this better fruit

so what is that I think verse 35 clarifies it for us life and favor from the lord

so a wise person doesn't do something because it will succeed but because it's right and loving

towards god so think of it relationally confessing your sin in in a broken relationship is the good

way to restore a relationship and you desire for that to happen but you can't success isn't the

primary motivation you hope success happens that the relationship is restored but that's not the

primary motive the primary motive in confessing your sin is it's right and it pleases the lord

trying to gauge if that makes sense or not if I've muddied the waters I'm not sure

god's ways usually produce results but the results isn't what we're aiming for

we're doing it because it's right and it pleases the lord we receive favor from the lord

and there's a very good reason why doing what is right and loving towards god works in life and that

and that brings us to verses 22 to 31 it's because woman wisdom is the architect of all that exists

she made it all she designed it

as we read these verses it is really critical to remember we're reading poetry here

it's not saying that there's this personal entity outside of god that that's existed before the world

that god consulted to make the world this is poetry it's this woman wisdom is god's mind

intrinsic to his eternal being

so woman wisdom made the world

before we read these verses do you know what one of the key features is that makes a person's face

beautiful now I learned this on four corners I'm not just making this up

one of the key features I was surprised to learn this it's symmetry

it's not like big eyes or whatever it's symmetry the left and right being in order

sorry if you've got a bent nose

probably don't play rugby

it's when things are in order that things are beautiful that we delight in them

so

a stone wall is more beautiful than just a pile of those same stones

or

a garden looks beautiful when

the weeds are gone and it's trimmed not when it's wild

when things are in order that's when

we delight in it that's when

that's what we call beauty

order makes something beautiful something to delight in

I think that'll help us understand these verses the picture in these verses recalls Genesis 1 when God created order out of chaos creating the world

let me read some of the verses

ages ago I was set up at the first before the beginning of the earth when there was no depths I was brought forth

before the mountains had been shaped

when he established the heavens I was there

when he assigned to the sea its limit

so that the waters might not transgress his command

when he marked out the foundations of the earth

then I was beside him like a master workman

and I was daily his delight

rejoicing before him always

rejoicing in his inhabited world

and delighting in the children of man

wisdom wasn't just

there observing she was the agency through which everything came about including you and me

wisdom was God's architect

God looked at wisdom and said

you are absolutely necessary

indispensable

for ordering all things making things beautiful

to delight in

there's no speck of our life

no aspect of our life

that wasn't made by God's wisdom

now here's the implication for us

to live in harmony with the way the world works

we need to listen to the architect who made it

how do we listen to the architect?

well graciously the architect has spoken to us

the rest of the book of Proverbs

all of God's words to us

and most fully that word comes to us in the word of the gospel

when Jesus the embodiment of wisdom arrives

Tim Keller therefore calls the Bible

since it's the word of our creator

our soul's owner's manual

I really like that

the problem is none of us read manuals anymore

our soul's owner's manual

so I'm going to tweak it a bit

and call it our soul's YouTube tutorials

I did watch one the other day

to tie a Windsor knot

that's where I go to

to work out life

I'm not sure if I should be suggesting that or not

so the question is

do you treat the architect's words

as the place you go to

to work out how to live well

or do you listen to Jordan Peterson

now I want to make a nuance point here

you can listen to Jordan Peterson

if a non-Christian

looks at the world

and studies it

and knows how it works

they've discovered God's wisdom

they just don't acknowledge that

so you can listen to non-Christians

my point is

where is your primary

primary source of authority in life

do you treat God's words

as a place you go to

to work out how to live

why wouldn't we

we'd be a fool not to

wouldn't we

this is the architect

telling us

this is what life

this is how it works

this will make it

ordered and beautiful

you'll delight in it

to listen to woman wisdom

is to live in harmony

with how the world was designed

that raised a question in my mind

maybe it has for you as well

if that's the case

why doesn't it feel like

God's ways

are best

so often it just doesn't

feel like it's the best way

like acquiring possessions

feels more valuable

than giving

or leisure

is more enjoyable

than serving

or retaliation

feels more satisfying

than turning the other cheek

or demanding our rights

feels more just

than laying them down

and letting them go

or gossip

is more exciting

than self-control

why is that the case

without going into

each of these things

and looking at the real cost

of choosing these

options

I think the opening chapters

of Proverbs gives us

a few answers

first

foolishness doesn't come

to us saying

hey I'm foolishness

choose me

it comes to us saying

here's a better wisdom

here's the best way

to live

it's a counterfeit

it's a false

way to live

it pretends to be wisdom

in a sense

that's why we need

to be warned

don't be seduced

by her

don't choose her path

it just leads

to destruction

so we need discernment

to listen

and work out

which is really wise

and I think

the second reason

is

since Adam

believes Satan's

deception in the garden

by nature

we're prone

to believing

that same lie

we already

are in love

with Lady Folly

so

if we can't even

recognise foolishness

when we see it

and we actually

desire it

more than true wisdom

a lot of the time

what hope

have we got

it would be a bad place

to end the sermon

the hope is

woman wisdom

is pursuing us

she's calling out

to us

and she's offering

us something better

we need to see

that she

she offers us

something better

doing something

just out of duty

will work

for a moment

but really

if you want to

live in God's ways

we need to be convinced

that God's ways

are good

in the last few verses

summarise what

she's offering us

ultimately

let's hear her words

oh my sons

my sons

she's not some stranger

she's no adulteress

like Lady Folly

who offers us

excitement in the moment

but who really

is just wanting us

to die

oh my sons

she can call us

that

because she's

the architect

who made us

the love she offers

isn't just the thrill

of a one night stand

the love she offers us

is the steadfast

care

and affection

of a mother

who only wants

our good

all the time

she offers us love

but I think

it's a different kind

here's what she says

verse 35

whoever finds me

finds life

and obtains

favour from the Lord

but he who fails

to find me

injures himself

all who hate me

love death

to be in relationship

with woman wisdom

results in favour

from the Lord

it's to receive

the love of God

it's to be in relationship

with God

it's to be in harmony

not just with how the world works

but to be in harmony

with our maker

knowing his love for us

his approval of us

his delight in us

so what does it look like

to respond to woman wisdom

what does it

what does it actually look like

we need to find her

searching diligently

diligently for her

with a guarantee

remember

that if we do

we will find her

she wants to be found

she's available

she's everywhere we turn

and this looks like listening

daily watching at her house

always waiting beside her doors

constantly

diligently

looking for her

but what does that mean

practically

it really will be

seen in how we treat

God's words

do we

look at the rest

of the book of Proverbs

the rest of God's words

to us

our maker's words

to us

and treat them

as

the guide to life

the way to live best

do we listen

to Proverbs

when it tells us

how to use our words

how to work

faithfully

how to treat those

in authority

over you

how to treat your parents

and your spouse

and children

and so on

are we listening

as a church

are we listening

to God's words

individually

in our families

and not just Proverbs

the book of Proverbs

we're going to read

the whole manual

we're going to watch

all the YouTube tutorials

and these tutorials

point to one direction

not the band

in one solution

the one example

to follow

and not just

the example

otherwise it's down

to our own effort

but the one

saviour

the one solution

who is our wisdom

who gives us

his wisdom

who lives that

perfect life

of wisdom

on our behalf

so that we have

the favour of God

Colossians 2-3

says

in Christ

are hidden

all the treasures

of wisdom

and knowledge

he is our wisdom

life is complicated

but Christ

is pursuing us

through his word

if only we would

listen

to how he says

life is best

lived

because he is

the embodiment

of God's wisdom

his word

woman wisdom's words

become

Christ's words

to us

whoever finds

me

finds life

and obtains

favour from the

Lord

but he who

fails to find

me injures

himself

all who hate

me love

death

will you pray

with me

Lord Jesus

I just pray

for us as a

church

and individually

that you would

continue to

reveal to us

as we

take on the

posture of

little children

may you

continually reveal

to us that

you

are good

that your

ways bring

life

in Jesus name

Amen