Christian Vocation: Janet Lydecker, psychologist

All right, morning everyone.

We're going to get going.

We're continuing our class about vocation, about faith and work.

And this morning Janet Leidenker is going to be speaking with us about faith, work, and mental health.

Janet works as a psychology researcher and she may tell a little bit more about that.

So let's pray for her as we begin.

Lord, we thank you for gathering us here this morning.

We thank you, Lord, for the wisdom that you give to us through your word, through your spirit.

Lord, as we learn through the different experiences that you lead us through in our lives.

We pray that we would benefit from what Janet has shared with us this morning.

Pray that you would empower her with your spirit.

We pray these things in Jesus' name. Amen.

Amen.

There we go.

All right.

Well, thank you all for being here.

I am going to talk about faith, work, and mental health today.

So I am going to walk through some of my experiences being a psychologist and being a Christian

and how I thought about integrating the two over the years.

I am going to start by explaining exactly what it is that I do

and then talk about a little bit of why I chose my profession

and my approach to treating patients and work-life balance

and some of the professions that are facing me and also my profession.

So by way of background, I am a counseling psychologist.

I work as an assistant professor in the Department of Psychiatry at the Yale School of Medicine.

And virtually no one knows what that actually means.

So I will try to explain a little bit about what that really is.

So I did my doctoral training in counseling psychology,

which is an offshoot of clinical psychology.

That means that during graduate school, I was trained to treat patients,

to conduct clinical research, and to teach,

and then to advocate for patients and do leadership in that sense.

So psychologists specialize in psychological or behavioral treatment.

So unlike psychiatrists who prescribe medication,

we do what's commonly known as talk therapy.

Our daily work ends up looking very similar to most mental health professions,

but we do have this additional element of clinical research

as well as advocacy and leadership in it.

So counseling psychologists have a particular identity within the field of psychology.

So we, like I said, are an offshoot of clinical psychology

that expanded the patients that we treat

and also our approach to how we do treat them.

So we see patients across the full severity spectrum,

so from normal life stressors all the way up through serious mental illness,

and across the full lifespan as well.

So I've literally seen patients between the ages of one and we'll go with over 80.

And I'm primarily trained as a child psychologist,

but with the idea that anyone in the full age spectrum is someone who I should and can treat.

As an approach, the difference between counseling and clinical psychology

is that we do emphasize the strengths of patients, including diversity.

So we have an additional emphasis on multicultural competence.

And then trying to pull from a person what their individual strengths are

in order to overcome some of their difficulties.

Advocacy is a big part of who I am as a professional

in terms of advocating for patient groups

and then also empowering individuals to advocate for themselves.

So that, like I said, is who I am as a professional.

So I wanted to spend a little bit of time now talking about vocation

and why I chose to do what I'm doing.

So back in college when I was trying to figure out what I wanted to do as a career,

I wanted to help people.

And I thought that my personality and some of my skills

would be best suited to helping people through therapy.

And I do thoroughly enjoy helping people in this way.

But I struggled a lot with the idea of calling.

So after college, I worked for a couple of years

to try to figure out for sure what it is I wanted to do.

I knew I wanted to go back to school,

but I didn't know what kind of training I wanted to do.

And calling is or was something that I certainly struggled with

because of some of the inherent problems

in thinking about what a career actually is.

So if you think about a helping profession,

there's a lot of meaning in being able to help people.

But I think that's different from a calling.

I think wanting to do something

and feeling like you'd be good at doing something

are both very different from feeling as though

God is asking you to actually do a certain type of work.

In helping professions,

I know a lot of people,

the majority of psychologists,

are not Christian or have any faith of their own.

And yet still will say that they do what they do

because of the meaning that's part of it.

And because they like being able to help people.

So I struggled with,

well, that's not all that it could be

to feel like this is a calling.

And yet I did feel called to do the work that I do.

I was also surrounded by people in my faith communities

at the time who were doing jobs

that weren't helping professions

and that didn't have an obvious way

that people would say,

oh, well, clearly I'm doing the work of God.

And so it felt like a privilege to be able to say,

well, I'm helping people.

So therefore, it is a calling.

So I came across this verse, Isaiah 6, 8,

and this helped me a great deal

in how I reframed my idea of what calling was.

So I'm going to read the passage from the beginning.

For context, Isaiah is having a vision

where he's in the throne room of God

and ends by having a commission from God.

So this is Isaiah starting in chapter 6.

In the year of King Uzziah's death,

I saw the Lord sitting on a throne,

lofty and exalted,

with the train of his robe filling the temple.

Seraphim stood above him, each having six wings.

With two he covered his face,

with two he covered his feet,

and with two he flew.

And one called out to another and said,

Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts.

The whole earth is full of his glory.

And the foundations of the thresholds trembled

at the voice of him who called out

while the temple was filling with smoke.

Then I said, woe is me, for I am ruined,

because I am a man of unclean lips,

and I live among a people of unclean lips.

For my eyes have seen the King,

the Lord of hosts.

Then one of the seraphim flew to me

with a burning coal in his hand,

which he had taken from the altar with tongs.

He touched my mouth with it and said,

Behold, this has touched your lips,

and your iniquity is taken away,

and your sin is forgiven.

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying,

Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?

Then I said, Here am I, send me.

And after this, Isaiah gets the prophecy

that he's to deliver to people.

So the reason why this helped me is it shifted my idea of calling

as something that was a very specific call

that God had made exactly for me

to something that was much more flexible.

So there's a list of tasks that God wants and needs done

that will address a lot of the brokenness in the world.

And it's not about me or being selected and singled out to do something,

but it's a task that, in a way, I'm volunteering for.

And someone else could have built the space,

but it is still a calling.

It's still working for the Lord.

So at the time when I was deciding to go to graduate school,

this verse really helped me be able to say to myself

that this was the calling that I was choosing to do.

So I specialize in the treatment of eating disorders and obesity.

And I specifically chose to specialize in this

when I was starting to go to graduate school.

You have to pick an area of specialization,

but people vary in terms of how much they focus on it

versus how much they learn more of the general practice of psychology.

I'm highly specialized, even more so as I've gone throughout the years.

So as I started learning about eating disorders,

I took classes in college

and really had a fascination by some of these disorders.

And eventually when I started working with patients

with some of the extremes of how they were expressed,

I started to see eating disorders as conditions of ungrace,

of not being willing or able to accept self-compassion

or compassion from others or forgiveness from yourself or from others.

which is not to say that Christians can't have eating disorders.

I think they are a sign of brokenness that we're all susceptible to.

But when I'm sitting across from my patients,

this is a very glaring manifestation of brokenness

where some of the rigidity and patience

and the perfectionism seems to,

and the desire to be personally in control of everything,

just seems to make it impossible

or seemingly impossible for these individuals

to accept any sort of compassion towards themselves

or from anyone else.

Which really, which spoke to me.

And that I remember when I first started thinking about this

and was fascinated by it,

it just felt so wrong.

It really spoke to the advocate in me

and the compassion in me

that this was something that I wanted to be invested in

and work to try to help fix.

So, I'm often asked,

often asked whether I share my faith with my patients.

And this to me is a very difficult question.

I'm often at a loss for how to answer it.

In part, it's because there's a fundamental misunderstanding

of psychological treatment in the question,

but in part, it's something that I still wrestle with

and it's a case-by-case, individual-by-individual question.

So, my job as a psychologist

is to take the best treatments we have,

the ones with the most evidence,

and to deliver them as faithfully as possible to individuals.

So, I have to know what the areas are

where there is flexibility

and also the areas where there isn't

and where there are active ingredients in the treatment.

So, some particular intervention,

some way of working through

some of the thoughts and emotions that are problematic

that we know works and stick to that

because I know that's what all the evidence says

is going to help.

The areas of flexibility tend to be around

motivation and encouragement and coping skills

and how people think about themselves

and how to overcome their barriers

and make use of the different skills that we're working on.

So, in terms of sharing my faith,

I don't often have the place

where I would share my own personal experience,

but I do work with what patients put out there

in terms of their own faith,

and it almost always comes up.

And I think one of the biggest differences

between a Christian psychologist

and someone who isn't

or between me and my colleagues

who don't have any personal faith

is a willingness to sit with the faith of the patient

and to help them figure out

what that means for them

and how that works with

some of their psychopathologies,

some of their struggles,

and how we can maximize

the resources they have,

both personally,

thinking about how they cope

and how they pray

and how they think about the world,

and more instrumentally,

so thinking about the social support

and the other forms of support

they get through religion.

And that's not small.

So, even though it's not a main part

of an intervention that I would do,

I think a lot of my patients

who I've seen

and who have engaged with me

on using their faith

to try to reinvent

who they would be as a person,

that's been very powerful.

What is more difficult

is when the patient

doesn't have any faith of their own,

and a lot of times they get asked,

well, why wouldn't you just share

the gospel with them

if you know that that's what they need

and what would fix them?

And, again,

psychological treatment is difficult.

It's one of those challenging times

when people are so vulnerable

and have so much pain

and avoidance

of many parts of their lives

that it's difficult

to be too proactive

about something as important

and as integral to identity as faith.

So, there is quite a strong potential

for more harm than good

with trying to be overly aggressive

and sharing faith.

So, again, it's case by case,

it's individual by individual,

and it's something that I struggle with.

But, ultimately,

I end up praying a lot for my patients

and hoping that God is planting seeds

and growing them

in a way that I can't necessarily plan to do.

There is a lot of hopelessness

in eating disorders,

excuse me,

in eating disorders and obesity,

where eating disorders in particular

are the hardest

among the mental health conditions

to treat

and have the highest mortality rate

of any mental health disorder.

And obesity,

which is my other area of specialty,

is such a chronic condition

that we really don't know anything

about how to help individuals

who are working on it,

but really don't have any powerful treatment

for either of these conditions.

And so,

some of the,

some of the problem

that we have for both of these

and the reason why it's harder

to make advances with individuals

and more broadly

is the stigma that comes

with both obesity and eating disorders.

And this, in more recent years,

in the past few years,

has become a major focus

what I do on a day-to-day basis.

So if you think about

mental health conditions broadly,

there's a lot of stigma about,

a lot of fear

directed towards patients,

a lot of blame.

You must have done something wrong,

your parents must have done something wrong.

The list goes on and on

about how we do blame individuals

with mental health conditions.

We see this quite a bit

with eating disorders.

I can't tell you the number of patients

who have come to me and said,

well, my uncle said I needed to

stop being so vain

and stop looking in the mirror

and I could be all set.

Or my mother said

I just grew out of it.

It really,

there are lots of

hurtful and misunderstood

messages that patients get

and that really deeply

come into

how they see themselves

in a way that's,

it's hard to uproot.

And it's very discouraging

discouraging for me

as a provider

trying to fight

this environmental

challenge as well

as help individuals

with their particular struggle.

We see the same thing

with obesity.

We're actually seeing it

more and more

even as rates

of obesity increase as well.

There's a lot of blame

for individuals saying,

well, why don't you just eat less?

Well, why don't you just exercise more?

We need to have more self-control.

And that's just not true.

It's just an oversimplification.

If that were all that it took,

we wouldn't have this problem

that we have in the United States

and now actually around the world.

There are so many other factors

that are outside of people's control,

including genetics,

but many, many, many beyond that,

that make it difficult

for people to lose weight

and to treat their obesity.

So a big part of my professional identity

is to try to help people

become aware that stigma's there

and to help patients understand

that they don't deserve

to be treated this way,

that it's unfair,

that people will say

these particular criticisms to them

and help them to advocate

for their own rights.

Potentially, most painfully,

we do see it in healthcare a great deal.

So again, I can't tell you

how many patients have said,

well, I really don't want to go to my doctor.

I know you're telling me

that my blood pressure is high,

but when I go,

they just make me feel horrible

and tell me I need to lose weight

and I need to stop eating junk food

and then I wouldn't have

a blood pressure problem.

And it's well-meaning.

It's trying to help the patient

understand the importance of their health,

but it's often when patients

are seeing either in treatment,

so they're making every effort

that they can to lose weight

or to get their weight

in a healthy range

in the case of eating disorders.

And so hearing that

they're just not doing enough

is damaging

and will cause patients

to not go back to their providers.

So again, a lot of my job,

and this comes from

my professional identity,

but also from my faith,

is to help people realize

that they do have dignity as a person

and that no matter what

their mental or physical health condition,

that they do deserve

to be treated with compassion

and with understanding

and certainly with respect.

So psychology is hard.

One of the major themes,

one of the major things

I've thought about over the years

is the idea of this to happen

and of rest.

Freud called the profession of psychology

an impossible profession

and said, in a nutshell,

that no one who delves so deeply

into human suffering

can come out unscathed.

And that's true.

We have this idea of compassion fatigue

where it is exhausting

and it's traumatizing to some extent

to hear people suffering

over and over and over

if you're not taking care of yourself

at the same time.

So I started looking into the Sabbath

in college.

My small group decided to observe the Sabbath

and we looked a little bit

at some of the writings

and some of the scripture on it.

I'm sure you all remember this

from earlier this summer

in Exodus.

We are commanded to keep the Sabbath,

to take a day of rest

once in the course of a week.

So in college,

when I first started studying the Sabbath,

I have a very vivid memory

of a paper that I wrote

for a psychology class.

It was a very humbling experience.

So I started from the perspective

of believing that we were called

to observe the Sabbath

as an act of obedience

and a discipline,

but that it was something

that God would honor our faithfulness,

but it wasn't quite rational.

It didn't really make sense.

I was coming from all of the many years

of being told not to procrastinate,

that if you have a certain amount

of stuff to do,

then you spread it out

over as much time as possible

because if you condense it,

you have too much stress.

And so I thought,

well, of course,

it would be the same principle.

If you work for six days

instead of seven,

you're going to have more stress

and you're going to be worse off,

and yet we're called

to be obedient in this

and to give up some of that control

and be faithful to God.

I could not have been more wrong.

So like I said,

it was a psychology paper,

so I looked at all the science

that goes into this idea of resting.

They wouldn't call it the Sabbath,

but it is a direct correlate.

So we have this idea

called the self-regulatory hypothesis,

and basically it says

that self-control is like a muscle,

that it's something that you work,

you exercise over and over and over.

You try time and time again

to have self-control,

to stick to those habits,

stick to those practices

that you want to stick to,

and then you need to rest it.

So like with exercise,

like with a muscle,

you break it down

and you get the additional strength

in that rest period

when the muscle builds back up.

So self-control is the same way.

So being able to do work

is the same way.

Being able to think about

difficult problems

to write and to keep going,

to give of yourself to patients.

All of the many tasks that you do

fall under this idea of self-control,

that if you don't take that rest,

you are just continually draining

and you end up with

what we now call compassion fatigue,

that you're just kind of flat and dead

and can't pull up resources

that no longer exist.

So that was understandably

convicting to me,

that we have this idea in Scripture

that we should be keeping the Sabbath

and science supports it,

that from both directions,

it really does seem to be

what is best for our well-being.

So I have tried

over the years,

in particular in graduate school,

to keep the Sabbath,

so to take a day

in the course of a week

when I don't do work.

Keeping the Sabbath

means a lot of different things

for a lot of different people.

There are some who

don't do chores,

don't cook,

don't spend money.

There are lots of different ways

to express this.

For me,

where I spend so much of my time

writing and doing

and thinking

and doing work,

I just don't do my job

for one day a week.

I like the way

Tim Keller talks about Sabbath.

He has really great writings

and sermons on it

where the bigger picture

is that not being able

to take a rest

is a form of slavery

or oppression.

So even as we're called

to obedience

and resting for one day a week,

it's also a freedom

and it's something

that we can take delight in

and take joy in.

And my experience

has certainly been

that having that day off

has been the time

when I've had

the resources

to put into relationships

to actually think

and spend time with God

and I don't think

I've ever regretted

taking some time off.

But I also,

I don't know

that that's totally true,

I also think

it has made

a lot of my work

the other six days

or five days of the week

more productive

and with greater insight

and ability

to focus

and to work hard

and conscientiously.

I also think

that the Sabbath,

just like I had

rationally hypothesized

at the beginning,

is a nice way

to remind myself

that it doesn't

just rely on me.

That taking a day off,

nothing,

nothing is really

a problem

on the day

when I don't show up

to work

or on the day

when I don't

try to push things

a little bit further

that it really isn't

about me.

So this is

my verse for the year

and it comes

out of both

the two ideas

that I've been talking about,

the idea of vocation

and then also

the idea of rest.

So 1 Corinthians 15, 58,

therefore,

my beloved brethren,

be steadfast,

immovable,

always abounding

in the work

of the Lord,

knowing that your toil

is not in vain

in the Lord.

So,

we've talked about

compassion fatigue,

we've talked about burnout,

where,

without taking care

of yourself,

we just don't

have the ability

to help others

as well.

We've talked about

the idea

that

we do work

for the Lord,

whether it's

a specific calling

or something

that we've decided

to do

with a more broader

understanding

of calling.

It has

an additional

importance,

an additional value,

because we're working

for the Lord

and not just

showing up

and doing

what we can

for purpose.

A lot of,

when we talk

about burnout

and meaning

within the profession,

we talk a lot

about self-care

as well as

what our daily

habits are

and daily patterns

are that will

help us

be more productive.

I think that

this verse,

the three parts

of it,

I do love

how they come

together

to ground

me

in how

I approach

work.

One thing

we haven't

talked about

too much

is

academia

itself,

which is a

very challenging

environment.

So,

even in the

midst of treating

patients,

there's this

additional level

at a medical

school or in

academia

where everything

is about

your reputation.

So,

everything is

about how

well you're

known for

the work

that you do

locally or

more broadly,

whether it's

being a fantastic

clinician or

being known

for research

and for

publishing.

There's this

idea that

everything

comes down

to your name,

which makes

it an

environment of

ego threats.

so a

place where

there's a

lot of

defensiveness

because if

you lose

your name

or if you

don't hold

up whatever

standard you've

set,

then you

are failing.

So,

these pressures

of wanting

to help

people and

also wanting

to succeed

can feel

hopeless at

times.

So,

this verse

has been

helping me

in terms

of sticking

to doing

the actual

work,

being steadfast

and immovable

and remembering

that it is

work for the

Lord.

So,

abounding in

the work for

the Lord,

not just

abounding in

work,

but in

the work

that I

have that

additional

value within.

And I

really like

the last

part of

this,

that it's

not in

vain.

So,

if you're

working for

the Lord,

then it's

not in

vain.

It won't

come to

nothing.

What it

does come

to is

unclear,

but it

won't be

nothing.

When I

first started

seeing

Patience,

my church

where I

went to

grad school

was doing

a series

on hope

and we

had this

definition

of hope

from biblical

scripture as

opposed to

modern

understanding,

which I

still hold

on to.

Hope is,

what I

have written

here,

the confident

expectation

that God's

work will

be successful.

I love

this definition.

So we

think about

hope in

the modern

understanding

where it's

more of a

wish.

So wishful

thinking,

something

seems like

it's unlikely,

maybe possible,

and I wish

that it would

happen.

That's how

we think

about hope.

But in

a lot of

the verses,

there's more

of a confidence

in it and

an expectation

that you can

rely on God

that,

just like this

verse says,

it's not going

to be in

vain,

that efforts

will come

through because

God's behind

it.

So that is

something that I

use very often

with patients,

but also in

how I think

about the

work that I

do and

trying to

figure out

career path

and what that

actually looks

like,

which is

always changing.

So,

some of the

challenges

that I

believe I

face and

my profession

faces,

I've tried to

outline here,

and these

are also my

prayer requests.

So personally,

I think the

themes we've

talked about,

so having

continued awareness

of calling and

what that means

in terms of

career path and

how it's

expressed,

there are

really infinite

possibilities for

how it could

come out,

and my

prayer is that

I continue to

pay attention

to it.

And then

continued

encouragement

amidst all

of the

challenges and

wisdom about

what work-life

balance really

means and

what rest

means and

how to

incorporate

that.

For my

individual

patients in

my patient

groups,

so individuals

with obesity

and or

eating disorders

more broadly,

that God

would protect

them from

harm,

including but

not limited to

harm that

comes from

these societal

attitudes that

are so

pervasive,

where stigma

and blame

and criticism

is compounding

some of the

attitudes that

they already

have towards

themselves that

they've

internalized.

and then

for my

colleagues,

psychology,

even among

the mental

health professions,

I think,

is particularly

secular.

So very few

Christians are

psychologists.

I was fortunate

enough in

graduate school

to have an

unusual number

of peers in

my cohort

who were

Christian,

and we

certainly talked

about and

struggled with

how faith

and work

interacted in

the brutal

challenges of

graduate school.

But I think

broadly for the

profession,

I would pray

that my

colleagues would

have a

grounding for

their identity

and something

more than

just academia

and would

start to see

a need or

a potential

for what it

would mean if

they had a

faith in

Christ for

their work

with patients

and then

more broadly

in the

practice of

psychology.

And it

will actually

end there

since I'm

losing my

voice.

I had some

discussion

questions over

the three

points,

but I wanted

to open it

up to

questions about

anything that

I talked

about or

anything more

broadly about

psychology or

eating disorders

deserve this

faith.

Are there

any questions?

Yeah.

Thank you for

your talk.

Obviously, it

relates to your

last prayer

request, but

I think it's

very commendable

that you are

a person of

faith in the

psychology field.

From a

patient standpoint

or a patient

advocacy standpoint,

I've definitely

seen providers

who are

apathetic at

best to

faith or

antagonistic and

dismissive at

worst.

So I

appreciate your

position.

I'm wondering

how do you

balance your

faith with

treating and

leveraging someone

who is not a

Christian?

Say someone who

is a devout

Muslim or a

Jewish, somebody

who their faith

is important to

them in a

similar way that

yours is important

to you.

How do you

balance?

Sure.

So as a

patient, if

they were sitting

across from

you, yeah.

I think my

approach is that

there are far

more similarities

with people who

have faith than

there are

differences.

And a lot of

the ways that I

would help

people make use

of a Christian

faith are

certainly applicable

to other

faiths, Judaism,

Muslim, any

other faith.

I do think

I've worked

over the

years to

have an

awareness of

what that

means,

particularly for

eating disorders

and obesity.

So when I

have a

patient, for

example, who

practices Islam

and who observes

Ramadan, I

work to try to

ask and be

sensitive about

what that means

for eating

patterns and

for body image,

and there are a

lot of complications

with that.

So I think

part of the

respect for

patients is

showing an

interest and

being aware of

what their

faith means to

them.

You distinguish

eating disorders

from obesity.

I do.

Do you see

that in a

different level

of culpability?

Not culpability,

but they are

two distinct

fields.

We struggle

a lot with

this as

psychologists

but also as

providers.

So eating

disorders and

obesity, if you

imagine a

Venn diagram,

they are too

distinct, but

there's a big

area of overlap.

We actually

have much

more of an

overlap these

days than I

think we were

aware of even

10 or 20

years ago.

my particular

specialty these

days is the

overlap between

the two and

patients who

have both

obesity and

some form of

eating disorder

and how they

manage both

of them.

So in terms

of what it

looks like to

have obesity or

an eating

disorder, there's

just a spectrum

for each of

them.

both, they

can be minimal

and more

developmental all

the way up

through very

severe for

each.

But when both

are there, I

think there are

additional

struggles and

additional

pressures that

make it more

complicated.

Does that

answer your

question?

Yeah?

So in the

field of

eating disorders,

has there been

more of a

correlation over

the years

correlated to

developmental

trauma and

neglect and

people over

compensating their

adult lives?

Yeah.

What's your

neglect?

Yes.

I don't think

it's increased,

but it's always

been there and

we're certainly

more aware of

it now.

So eating

disorders are

highly related

to childhood

and adult

trauma.

part of it

gets at that

idea of

personal control,

so feeling

out of control

or having

emotions that

are in

chaos or

overwhelming

and feeling

like, well,

I can control

what food I

put into my

mouth or I

can escape by

eating either

direction and

having that be

as part of the

response.

There are

patients who

will benefit

from treating

trauma and

those who

need eating

disorder treatment,

so it varies

on what

seems to be

the presenting

problem, but

they are highly

related.

There are some

professionals who

will say that

every single

eating disorder

patient has

had some

form of

trauma.

It's certainly

up there, I

think, saying

eating

bristle is

far too

far, but

it's highly

related.

Other

questions?

Yeah.

Do you have

thoughts on

how can

we as a

church be

helpful to

those within

the church who

are struggling

with eating

disorders or

with obesity?

Are there

positive things,

you know, you

mentioned some

of the negative

things that

people can do

or sort of

like thoughtless

comments people

make or something,

but are there

biblical truths

that are helpful

for Christians

that are struggling

with those things

that you've seen?

Are there ways

that we as

fellow believers

in Christ can

that is a

great question.

So how can

we help

patients with

eating disorders

as a church?

I do think

the primary

thing we can

do is not

try to go

overboard and

push too far

and try to

offer advice.

Particularly with

severe eating

disorders,

assuming the

person's in

treatment, which

is probably a

big way that

the church

could help

if they

identify an

eating disorder

that needs

treatment, is

trying to get

the individual

engaged in

treatment.

But if they

are, they're

dealing with a

lot.

So the

treatment process

is intense.

And so forms

of social support

and coming

around someone

in a way that

gives them

space, so not

watching everything

that they eat,

but also makes

them feel like

they're loved

and supported

by people who

aren't just

their therapist

or their family

who's entrenched

in the treatment,

I think goes

so far and

wide.

Often my

younger patients,

my adolescents,

will talk about

how their whole

life becomes

treatment and

they just want

to talk to

someone about

something that's

not exactly

what they ate

or whether they

moved their

leg in order

to burn some

calories after

lunch.

so almost

being a

respite.

You've

talked about

some of the

challenge is

for these,

the needs are

so profound,

so deep,

you're involved,

you're compassionate,

you can feel

yourself drawn in

and then as a

Christian,

this sort of

demand for

neighbor love

could get

you to pour

yourself out

completely.

You talked

about the

tension of

just kind of

self-preservation,

but are there

concrete things

that you do

in the midst

of all of

these needs

to help

calibrate

what does

love call

me to do,

but what does

wisdom call

me to refrain

from,

just any

practical tips

on how to

navigate if

we find

ourselves,

as we all

do in some

sense in a

fallen world,

in which the

need around

us is ubiquitous

and deep,

and the

call to

love,

like the

Samaritan,

is profound,

and yet we

find that

challenge of

how do we

not just

completely

trust ourselves.

Yeah,

absolutely.

I can tell

you what I

do.

I don't know

how prescripted

it would be,

but I can

certainly

describe it.

In the

moment,

sitting across

from someone,

it's been a

hard lesson,

but an

important one

to learn

that I

can't

actually help

them more

than they

want to be

helped,

so I

often find

myself trying

to go that

extra mile

and help

them despite

some barrier,

some unwillingness

to change,

and that's

a problem,

and that

is probably

the biggest

source of

drainage or

exhaustion.

So that,

I would say,

is the wisdom

in the moment

and certainly

consulting with

colleagues to

figure out,

well, do I

go further,

is this the

time when I

step back and

give them some

space to

hopefully create

some change

in that way?

Personally,

so outside of

the therapy

room,

I do a lot

around this

idea of rest

and stepping

away,

so trying

to have

boundaries

from leaving

work at

work and

being outside

of work when

I'm not

there,

which is

mostly

successful,

but not

ever completely.

I do

appreciate

the commute,

so when I

walk home

or when I

walk to

work,

part of that

is in order

to have a

separation

between

what happens

at work

and what

happens outside

of work

and being

able to

separate that

with the

time and

the head

space of

being in

two different

locations.

I had a

friend when I

did my residency

in Charleston

who had a

amazing bridge

that goes over

one of the

rivers there,

and every time

she crossed the

bridge, she

just turned

off work and

said,

well, no,

now I'm done.

I'm past this

bridge, and I

love that idea

of having that

visual marker.

Now I'm

leaving this

there.

I also guard

my mood

pretty strictly,

so in terms

of media

consumption,

I have a

hard time

reading books

or watching

movies that

are very

depressing,

because I

just need a

time without

some of that

setness and

seriousness.

I do things

like that where

I pay attention

to, well, if

I do this, if

I consume this,

how will I

feel after

and try to

separate out.

thank you, Janet.

Let's pray for

Janet and for

some of the

prayer requests

that she

mentioned.

Father, thank

you for Janet

this morning.

We pray for

your continued

guidance on

her personally

and her work

and her resting

and her personal

life.

Lord, we pray

that you would

guide her in

her career path

and her desire

to do all

that she is

doing for

your glory

and in honor

of you, Lord.

We pray also

for the patients

that she's

working with,

for those who

are struggling

with eating

disorders or

obesity.

We pray that

you would

protect them

from harming

themselves, even

when they feel

like they want

to do that.

Lord, that you

would show them

a better way,

that you would

restrain them,

and that you

would also pour

out your grace

upon them.

Lord, that they

would know

your kindness

and that we

don't have to

deserve that

and that we

never will,

and yet you

pour out your

kindness to us

every day,

even in preserving

our bodies

and our souls.

Lord, we pray

that many people

would know

and be transformed

by the grace

of Christ.

And Lord, we

pray for

Janet's colleagues.

We pray particularly

in a field

that is very

secular.

Lord, for

openness,

for openness

to conversations

about faith,

for openness

to the

importance of

a patient's

faith in God,

for openness

to conversations

with Janet

about what

faith means

to her, Lord,

and for her

colleagues to

sense their

need for you,

Lord, to see

that though

psychology and

counseling are

helpful in many

ways and can

be instruments

of your

common grace,

Lord, that

they cannot

save us at

the deepest

level.

Lord, that

her colleagues

would long

for what only

you can give

us.

And we pray

for Janet

that as your

word says

you'd be ready

to give an

answer to

everyone who

asks the

reason for the

hope that we

have.

Lord, that you

would sustain and

strengthen that

hope within

her and give

her opportunities

to share that

with people who

would desire to

know more about

that.

We pray all

these things in

Jesus' name.

Amen.

Amen.

We're not going

to set up any

tables.