Christ in the Home

seated. Well, good morning, church. Our sermon text today is Colossians chapter 3, verse 17,

Colossians 3:17

through chapter 4, verse 1. That's page 984 in the Pew Bible. Let's go ahead and turn there together.

As James mentioned, this morning is something of a special Sunday because we have three people

getting baptized. Now, baptism in the New Testament is the means of publicly professing

faith in Jesus Christ. It's an outward sign that through trusting in Jesus, we've been

cleansed of our sin, we've been raised to new life in Him, and we've been made a part of His body,

His church, and the world. And part of what baptism is meant to do, part of the reason why Jesus gave

us baptism is as a way of speaking assurance to our hearts. Baptism is a word of assurance from God that

His promises of grace in the gospel are as real and as certain to us as this wet water that washes over

us. It's a beautiful thing. And in a little bit, Gary and Daniel and Chuck are going to come up,

and they're going to do just that. They're going to profess their faith in Christ and get baptized

as a sign of all that Christ has done for them. You'll notice in the order of service that Sam

Stevens was also scheduled to get baptized today, but his dad, Jeff, couldn't make it. He's actually

caring for a family member in the hospital this morning. So have no fear, we will reschedule Sam's

baptism soon, which means that if you would like to get baptized, there's a date going to be coming up

where that can take place. So if you've placed your trust in Christ and you haven't been baptized yet,

come talk to me after the service. We'd love to talk about next steps. So baptism is a sign of our

new life in Christ. And if you've been here at Trinity the last few weeks, you know that we've

been walking through Colossians chapter 3, which is all about living out this new life that we have

Colossians 3 · chapter mention

through faith in Christ. And what our text today is going to show us actually is that there is no

sphere of life that is off limits from the lordship of Jesus and from this new life that we have in

Christ. In fact, we're going to see that living out this radical new creation life starts at home.

So why don't we pray together and then I'll read Colossians starting in chapter 3, verse 17. Let's pray.

Our God, we do thank you for the glorious hope that we've just sung about in Christ that one day he will

return and we will be able to say it is well with our soul because you have forgiven all of our sins

and you've given us a living hope through your Holy Spirit. Father, now as we come to your word,

we pray that you would grant us your Holy Spirit that we might understand it or that our hearts would

be receptive to what your Spirit is saying to us that we might see the goodness and the glory of what

it means to live out this new life in Christ together. We pray for your help in this in Jesus' name. Amen.

All right, picking up Colossians chapter 3, verse 17.

Colossians 3:17

And whatever you do in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God

the Father through him. Wives, submit to your husbands as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your

wives and do not be harsh with them. Children, obey your parents in everything for this pleases the

Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children lest they become discouraged. Bondservants, obey in

everything those who are your earthly masters, not by way of eye service as people pleasers,

but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord. Whatever you do, work heartily as for the Lord and

not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward.

You are serving the Lord Christ. For the wrongdoer will be paid back for the wrong he has done,

and there is no partiality. Masters, treat your bondservants justly and fairly,

knowing that you also have a master in heaven.

Well, in one of his parables, Jesus once described the kingdom of God like a mustard seed.

A mustard seed, Jesus said in this parable, is one of the smallest of all the seeds,

and yet a man took that seed and planted it in a field, and that small seed took root and grew

and became a tree, larger than all the other garden plants, big enough for the birds of the air to come

and make nests in its branches and to find safety in its shade.

In other words, what Jesus is saying here is that the world-changing reign of God and the gospel

often starts with something simple, something small, something seemingly insignificant.

But from that small start, it has the power to grow and to change things forever,

and to even bring blessing to the world.

In verse 17, where we started our reading, Paul hits the climax of his description of the new life,

the new humanity that we've become in Christ.

And whatever you do, in word or in deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus.

That is a sweeping, awe-inspiring statement, isn't it?

It makes you want to just go win the world for Christ, right?

And cure cancer and end poverty and plant churches for the sake of his name,

to dream big dreams for Jesus' sake.

And that's a good desire.

But surprisingly, Paul's first application of this radical new life

is in a much more mundane, everyday, seemingly insignificant sphere of our home,

of our household relationships.

It's as if Paul is saying if the new life in Christ is going to mean anything at all,

it has to impact our real relationships.

The transformation that happens through the gospel of grace has to start like a seed

in the mundane, everyday relationships right at home.

Then isn't it true that those relationships closest to us are often the most difficult?

Do you remember the part in To Kill a Mockingbird when Scout is talking to Miss Maudie about her father Atticus

and she says,

Atticus don't ever do anything to Jem and me in the house that he don't do in the yard.

In other words, she's saying that her father's character is the same in private as it is in public.

What he does in the yard for everyone to see is the same as in the house where no one can see.

But how many of us could say that that's always true in our own case for our own selves?

Our family members often see the worst side of us, don't they?

But if the gospel can make a difference there,

if it can change our relationships at home,

then the seed will really take root,

become a tree,

and maybe even start to turn the world upside down.

So this passage is showing us what it looks like

to live the new life in Christ in our most everyday relationships,

which are also our most challenging relationships,

our relationships with our family,

with our household.

Now in order to do justice to this text with the short time that we have before we go to baptism,

I want to start with kind of a wide angle view of the passage,

and then I want to zoom into the particulars,

and then I want to come back out again to see the whole.

So first, let's take a wide angle lens.

What do we learn taking this passage as a whole?

Now for starters,

a typical Greco-Roman household in the first century was a bit broader than ours today.

You'd have a husband and wife and children,

but often extended family too,

and of course you'd have a number of household servants to keep everything running.

Remember, this was in the age before modern technology.

No one had a dishwasher or a washer and dryer in the first century,

so it took quite a staff to run a big household.

And that's why Paul's instructions here include not just husbands and wives and parents and children,

but also servants and masters as well.

It was all seen as part of the household.

And Paul wasn't the only writer in his day to give directions on what household relationships should look like.

There were Greek and Roman and Jewish writers who offered their own version of what an ideal household should be,

or at least they would give advice on how the father ought to run them.

But when you compare Paul in the New Testament with those texts of the broader culture,

you start to see just how radical, just how countercultural Paul in the New Testament was.

Paul isn't simply cutting and pasting the cultural conventions of his day.

No, the radical preeminence of Christ that we've been studying in Colossians,

the liberating power of the gospel is at work, even here in the household codes.

For example, consider the status of the more societally vulnerable members of the family.

Wives, children, servants.

In many household codes of the day, these family members are clearly seen as inferior,

and often they weren't even addressed directly at all.

They weren't even worth talking to.

But for Paul in the New Testament, they are human beings made in God's image,

addressed as those with dignity and responsibility.

After all, Paul's directions to the household, as we've said,

comes in the context of the rest of chapter 3.

Do you remember verse 11 of chapter 3?

Here, there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised,

barbarian, Scythian, slave, free, but Christ is all and in all.

All.

Or consider Paul's teaching about our equal status as members of Christ from Galatians 3,

Galatians 3:27

verses 27 and 28.

For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ.

There is neither Jew nor Greek.

There is neither slave nor free.

There is not male and female.

For you are all one in Christ Jesus.

This is the soil out of which all of our Christian relationships grow.

Our oneness and our equal dignity and worth in Christ.

So, wives, children, servants, they aren't inferior.

They aren't just tools to be used.

They are God's image bearers and Christ's own fellow heirs of the kingdom.

But consider, too, how Paul addresses the more powerful or privileged person

in each of these three pairs of relationships.

Consider how he addresses the husband, the father, the parent, and the master.

You know, many household codes of the day would have granted the head of the household,

the paterfamilias, complete, unquestioned authority in the home.

Patria potestas, paternal power, to do as he wished.

But, notice how Paul has something very, very different to say.

To those in positions of power and authority, husbands, parents, masters,

he commands love and gentleness and justice.

This is what real Christ-like leadership looks like.

They are to use positions of authority not to advance their own desires,

but to promote the flourishing and renewal of God's image in others.

They're ultimately to seek the good of the other rather than their own,

even if and when it is costly.

Now, before we zoom in and look at how this gets fleshed out

in these three very different pairs of relationships,

let's pause on these two broad observations that we've just seen.

First, we see that to be under authority does not steal or diminish one's dignity or worth.

Second, to be in authority means to be responsible,

to act in love, understanding, and justice towards those under your care

that they might truly flourish.

And if that was countercultural in Paul's day, it certainly still is today, is it not?

On the one hand, too often we link dignity and worth

to social status, position, or privilege.

But that is just not so.

Our dignity comes from being made in God's image

and being redeemed and loved by Christ.

And you know, that actually frees us to come under authority when appropriate

without any threat to our identity, without any diminishment to our worth.

On the other hand, too often we think that being in authority

means that we get to call the shots and everyone else has to obey.

That others have to bend their wills around our needs and our desires.

But this is not the biblical picture of how authority is meant to be held.

It is meant to be sacrificially exercised for the other's good.

And this is why abuses of authority are so heinous and so wrong.

You see, the New Testament condemns self-seeking uses of authority.

Those kind of uses of authority that would exploit or take advantage of others

for our own gain, our own pleasure.

And it is very right to speak out against such abuses of authority.

What real authority looks like is not others bending their wills around our needs,

but being in a position to sacrificially bend our wills around their needs,

especially those who are vulnerable.

So that's the broad view.

Now, let's take a close-up.

Let's zoom in.

First, Paul addresses husbands and wives.

Wives, submit to your husbands as is fitting in the Lord.

This is verse 18.

Verse 19,

And husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.

So here we have a picture of submission and love.

In other words, our new life in Christ changes the marriage relationship

from one of adversarial coexistence to deferential loving friendship.

Now, of course, it is a massive understatement to say

that the language of submission is not very popular today.

Right?

I mean, submission is probably like one of five words that we just utterly despise as a culture.

Can we just say that?

Let's admit that.

Okay, good.

All right.

We're all being honest.

But you know, when the New Testament tells wives to submit to their husbands,

it does not mean that wives are simply to always say,

yes, dear, and then be a doormat to get walked all over.

Neither seen nor heard.

This is not in any way what the Bible means by submission.

Think of Adam and Eve in the garden.

I think that will give us a better picture of submission in marriage.

Adam had a mission to fulfill.

But it became clear very quickly that he could not do it on his own.

Eve was created as his strong ally with strengths and gifts to help Adam fulfill their God-given mission.

And so submission means becoming your husband's first and best ally in pursuit of your God-given mission.

But it isn't one-sided.

Husbands are meant to love their wives, which was an unheard-of command in the first century.

No husband was told to love their wife in a household code.

And yet here comes Paul crashing through.

And love here means putting down our rights for the sake of the other,

finding one's joy, as it were, in the joy of your spouse.

And so you see there's a reciprocity that begins to emerge in a Christ-centered marriage like a dance.

Yes, the husband takes the lead.

He sets the pace.

But his aim is the flourishing and the good of his wife in love.

And the wife following his lead in the dance brings all her strengths to bear

to help him pursue his God-given purpose as well.

And lest you think that is just me, a 21st century pastor,

kind of reading this in the most positive way possible.

Listen to John Chrysostom in the 5th century who is commenting on this passage.

He sees the exact same thing.

He says,

So husbands and wives, how is your dance?

In what ways, wives, do you need to reaffirm to your husband your glad and strong support of what God has called him to?

That you are beside him in the battle every step of the way,

your sword drawn, ready to fight at his side.

And in what ways, husbands, do you need to reaffirm to your wife that you take delight in her?

That you find your highest earthly joy in seeing her flourish?

That you would gladly spend and be spent for her sake.

How's your dance, friends?

Let's go on to the second relationship between fathers or parents and children.

Paul says,

Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.

Fathers, do not provoke your children lest they become discouraged.

Our new life in Christ changes the parent-child relationship from one of a frustrated battle of wills

to one of trusting obedience and soul-stirring encouragement.

Children are to obey their parents in everything,

not questioning or doubting or second-guessing everything they say.

Now, of course, Paul is assuming that the parents here are godly parents,

that they aren't asking the child to do anything that would be disobedient to God.

In all cases, in any relationship, we must obey God rather than men,

as Acts 5.29 says.

That goes, in other words, without saying in all of these commands that Paul gives.

Also, Paul is here talking about children who are still dependent

and living under their parents' care and protection.

He's talking about household here.

When it comes to adult children,

of course, they should still honor their parents in everything,

but the call isn't to necessarily obey them in the exact same ways that you would

if you were still living under their care and under their home as a child.

But here at home, Paul's pretty clear, children should obey.

And they should do so because it pleases the Lord.

Now, let me speak directly to the kids and teenagers for a second.

Guys, imagine if you had someone in your life

who loved you more than you could imagine,

who had your best interests at heart,

and who was much, much wiser in life than you.

I mean, wouldn't that be perfect?

Wouldn't you want to listen to that person

and maybe even do what they said?

I mean, if Tom Brady showed up at your football practice

and was like, okay, here's how you throw a pass,

you would not be like, ugh, Tom Brady's so controlling.

Why won't he let me live my life?

Of course not.

You'd be like, okay, Tom, show me again.

Am I getting it right?

Man, it's so great to have you here.

You're so wise.

You just care for me.

It's awesome.

Now, look, I know you don't think your parents are Tom Brady.

I get it.

But they're a lot wiser than you think.

And your life will go so much better

if you listen to them and, yes, obey them.

But here's the thing, ultimately.

This is why you should do it.

Not because it pleases your parents

and not because it will make your life go better,

though it will,

but ultimately because it pleases the Lord.

The sovereign God who made you

and loves you and left heaven

to come to earth to rescue you

actually finds joy

when you honor and obey your parents.

Do it not because your parents are cool.

They're probably not.

Do it because it pleases the Lord.

And parents,

don't be afraid

to require obedience of your kids.

You're helping them please the Lord.

Now, parents, you have a part to play in this as well.

It's possible, as Paul says in this passage,

to discourage your kids,

which the word kind of means

to suck the spirit right out of them.

When we're overly harsh or demanding,

when we refuse to accept them

and praise them for who they are,

or what's worse,

when we compare them negatively to other kids,

why can't you be more like your brother?

When we don't tune in to their desires and gifts

and instead try to relive our lives through them,

all of that in many other ways

is a form of provoking them.

And Paul's very insightful here.

He says,

it will shut them down.

Now, I know that a lot of parents

feel pretty much perpetual guilt

because we feel like we're messing up

constantly with our kids.

And let me just say this morning

that the grace of Christ

covers even your parenting mess-ups.

And God hasn't made a mistake

in giving you as the parent to your kids.

God knows what he's doing.

And rather than beating yourself up,

think of a way you can encourage your kids this week.

Pick something they've worked hard at,

even if they haven't done a great job.

Pick something they've worked hard at

or that you appreciate about them

and tell them how proud you are of them

and how much you're thankful for them.

Now, look, they might respond with a,

yeah, sure, whatever, Dad.

Whatever, Mom.

But it will mean more than you think.

It will be the seed that gets sown.

Well, let's move on to the third relationship,

servants and masters.

Now, we won't be able to spend a lot of time here.

And there are some good applications

that we can make to our own modern workplaces,

the relationship between employers and employees.

But rather than kind of go into all that,

maybe that's something you can talk about

over lunch or later this week.

I want to say a quick word about a question

that comes up in relation to this passage

and others like it in the New Testament.

And that question is,

is Paul approving of slavery here?

He's talking to slaves and masters.

Is he okay with it?

Well, the short answer to that question is no.

But let me unpack that with three points.

First, in this passage,

and others like it in the New Testament,

Paul is giving practical advice

on how to live within the existing social conditions

of the day,

not commenting directly on the rightness

or wrongness of slavery itself.

In other words, he's saying,

look, here's where you find yourself.

Here's how to live in that situation.

He's not saying,

here's what I think of slavery.

So it's wrong to think that Paul's description

of how to live under a certain fallen human system

equals an approval of the system itself.

The Bible has a lot to say

about how to bear up under persecution,

but it's not very positive

or approving of persecution of Christians.

Second,

when we hear the word slavery today,

we can't help but think

of 18th and 19th century

race-based chattel slavery.

And when we look at the New Testament,

when we look at Paul's writings,

we find that he explicitly condemns

at least two of the main features

of that evil institution.

First, the New Testament is very clear

that racism in all forms is wrong.

Both in creation and in redemption,

the Bible teaches us

that people of all racial and ethnic backgrounds

are equal.

And in fact,

the vision of heaven

that we have in Revelation

is of people of every tribe

and tongue and nation

united around the throne of God

and praise on equal terms.

So racism is clearly condemned

by Paul in the rest of the New Testament.

And in 1 Timothy 1, verse 10,

1 Timothy 1:10

Paul explicitly condemns

what he calls enslavers,

who are people

who would take someone captive

in order to sell them into slavery.

Which is what so much

of our 17th, 18th, 19th century

institution of slavery

was based on.

And Paul in the rest of the Bible

comes right out and says,

that is utterly, utterly wrong.

So Paul would have flatly condemned

what we think of as slavery today.

Third point.

Slavery in Paul's day

had a much broader meaning

than it does today.

For example,

in the first century,

slaves could own property.

Many could earn enough money

to purchase their own freedom.

Some were given positions

of relative honor

in the families that they served.

However,

even with that being the case,

what Paul and the other apostles

taught in the gospel

eventually led

to the dismantling

and the abolishment

of all forms of slavery.

Just consider the passage here

in Colossians for a second.

What is the underlying message

of Paul's advice

to servants and masters?

It's that they ultimately

all have one master in heaven,

the Lord Jesus.

Ultimately,

they serve the same master

and must both answer to him.

And their heavenly Lord Jesus

demands,

in chapter 4, verse 1,

that earthly masters

treat their servants

with justice

and equity

to view them

with equal dignity

and respect

not just as God's

image bearers

in creation

but also as fellow heirs

of the kingdom of God

in redemption.

Now, friends,

how on earth

could one

continue to treat

a fellow image bearer

and co-heir

of the kingdom of God

justly

and fairly

while still owning them

as a slave?

As the implications

of the gospel

were unpacked,

as the seed

took root

and grew,

slavery would have

to fall.

So the gospel

planted the seeds

that eventually

brought the system down.

Let's conclude

by zooming out

once again.

Throughout the passage,

there's a constant refrain,

isn't there?

Seven times

in this short passage,

Paul speaks

of the Lord.

Husbands and wives,

do what's fitting

in the Lord.

Parents and children,

do what's pleasing

to the Lord.

Servants should work

ultimately for the Lord

and not for men.

And earthly masters

should remember

that they too

have a master,

the Lord Jesus in heaven

and there's no

partiality with him.

What reframes

and reorients

all of our relationships,

even and especially

our household relationships,

is our relationship

to the Lord Jesus.

Jesus.

After all,

don't these commands

require that we lay down

our selfishness

and serve the people

before us?

Where does the power

come from to do that?

Paul's been whispering it

and saying it

the whole time

from our relationship

with the Lord Jesus.

It's because the Lord Jesus

willingly submitted himself

to the Father's will for us

that wives can willingly

submit to their husbands

in Christ.

It's because the Lord Jesus

loved us

and gave himself for us

that husbands can love

and lay down their lives

for their wives.

It's because the Lord Jesus

obeyed his heavenly Father

perfectly on our behalf

that we can seek to please him

by obeying our earthly parents.

It's because the Lord Jesus

is so gentle

and caring with us,

never breaking the bruised reed,

never quenching

the smoldering wick,

that we can be gentle

and understanding

with our children.

It's because the Lord Jesus

humbled himself

and took on the form

of a servant

dying on the cross for us

that even when we find ourselves

in situations of injustice,

we can still be faithful

under it

and serve the Lord Jesus.

It's because the Lord

has liberated us

from our sins

and freed us

from guilt and condemnation,

set us free

that we can treat others

with justice and fairness

even to the point

of setting them free

at great cost to ourselves.

And so the whole

of the Christian life,

even down to our most basic

relationships in the home,

are meant to flow out

of who Christ is

and what he's done.

And that means

knowing Christ

and being in him

transfigures

and transforms

even our most mundane

relationships

and makes them windows

and displays

of his glorious grace.

Do you know what that's like?

More importantly,

have you experienced

his grace for yourself?

Perhaps this morning

as you've been walking

through this text,

God's been moving

on your heart

and perhaps you've been

considering how far short

you fall

of what real

God-honoring relationships

are supposed to look like.

Perhaps you realize

that the ones

you're closest to

are the ones

you've hurt the most.

And when that starts

to sink in,

you start to wonder,

could God ever forgive me?

And is it possible

to have this new life?

Well, friends,

hear the good news

of the gospel.

That in Christ,

there is full

and free forgiveness.

And you,

who were dead

in trespasses,

Paul says in Colossians,

God made alive

together with him

having forgiven us

all our trespasses

by canceling

the record of debt

that stood against us

with its legal demands.

This,

he set aside,

nailing it

to the cross.

All of your wrongs,

all of your failures,

all the ways

in which you've hurt

those closest to you,

Christ has taken,

nailed to his own cross,

and borne away

so that you can have

his righteousness

and forgiveness

and freedom

and new life.

That is true

for all who place

their faith in Christ.

And that invitation

stands open

for you today

to place your trust

in him

and to receive

his forgiveness

and new life.

And as we celebrate

baptism this morning,

it's right for us

who've been baptized

to remember

our baptism,

to remember

what it signifies

and what it means

that we've died

and risen with Christ,

that the old is gone,

that the new has come,

and in remembering

that to be hopeful.

Perhaps you're discouraged

this morning

at how your household

relationships have been,

Christian.

Perhaps you don't see

much of Christ

in them at the moment.

But don't despair.

What small,

mustard seed-like act

can you take today,

take this week,

in the power

of the Holy Spirit

to begin sowing

toward Christ-like

relationships?

You have put off

the old self.

You have put on

the new.

You are a new creation

in Christ.

Live into that

this week.

Perhaps the first step

is to seek forgiveness

from the family member

that you've been failing

to relate to

in the way Paul

shows us here.

Perhaps it's to finally

grant forgiveness

to that family member

and to begin again

in the grace of Christ.

And as the parable

of Jesus reminds us,

we must never

underestimate

these small acts

of submission,

of love,

of patience,

of kindness,

of obedience.

These are the things

that grow.

That grow like mustard seeds

until our homes

and all of our relationships

become like mighty trees

with branches spreading out,

offering shade

and shelter

in our weary world.

Imagine if our households

could radiate

with the grace of Christ

like this passage

talks about.

Surely our neighbors

would be intrigued

and attracted

to what they see,

wouldn't they?

Surely the church

would be strengthened

and blessed

by the overflow of grace.

Surely Christ would be honored

as we do it all

in his name.

But it doesn't just

end at home.

It keeps going.

The call for us

in our baptism

and our discipleship

of Christ

and our life together

as a church

is to take this grace

into all of our relationships,

into every corner of life,

to keep going

until you find

that whatever you do

in word or deed,

you do everything

in the name

of the Lord Jesus,

giving thanks

to God the Father

through him

and then all of life

becomes a display

of his glorious grace.

Let's pray.

Father, we confess

this morning

that many parts

of this passage

strike us as hard.

Lord, just as it was

a countercultural word

in Paul's day,

so it is for ours.

Would you help us, Lord,

to have hearts

that are shaped

and humbled

and empowered

by your Holy Spirit

to see the goodness

in these words,

to know that we can

trust you?

Lord, how could we

not trust you

having sent your own son

to die for us?

How can you not

have our best in mind?

Help us to see

the goodness

in these words, God,

and help us

by your Spirit

to lay aside

the selfishness

and the old ways

that would want us

to continue to live

for ourselves

and help us

to put on the new self

to live lives

of love and peace

and thanksgiving

with those

who are closest to us?

And Father,

as we celebrate

baptism this morning,

we pray

that this joyous occasion

would speak assurance

to the hearts

of Chuck

and Daniel

and Gary

and Lord,

to all of us

this morning.

We pray this,

Father,

in Jesus' name.

Amen.

Well, friends,

let's do just that.

Let me invite

Charles and Daniel

and Gary

to come on up.

Come on up, guys.

So Gary and Daniel

are going to share

their testimony.

Chuck's testimony

is in the bulletin.

You can see it there.

He shares there

that he grew up