The Faithfulness of God

will begin. God's faithfulness.

That's what we'll be talking about today.

So a tried and true aspect of God's character.

Millions of believers have experienced personally, and it's

an attribute that's very precious, highly esteemed, and

our portion of times of trouble. God's faithfulness will be what we

consider today. So we'll look at what the Bible means when it

says God is faithful, three expressions of God's faithfulness, and then

conclude with application. And we'll have

some discussion together. So we began this series with the insight from A.W. Tozer

who said the most important thing about you is what comes into your mind when you

think about God. High views of God produce

high worship. Low views of God produce shallow worship.

Low views of God are figments of our imagination.

their idolatry. What the Bible writers understood about God was a shield to them

in times of trouble. It was a sword in the fight, in the battle of faith. It is a

foundation which you build your life upon, the wellspring of joy, a bright fire that

comforts us on a cold night. Sound doctrine, right thinking about God does that for the

Christian. It produces devotion. It produces doxology.

And I tend to think sound doctrine, what this whole series has been about, are like pieces

of wood that you stack together to create a fire. But the spirit produces the flame.

You put both these two things together, sound doctrine and the spirit, and it produces a

roaring, blazing fire in the soul. Without the spirit, we're merely pieces of dry wood.

We're dead. No power. There's no life. So with that, let's pray for the spirit's help before

we dive in. Father in heaven, we pray for your help this morning. We pray that God's faithfulness,

your faithfulness, Lord, would be the anchor that would ground us in the raging storms. We pray it

would be a precious truth that we would come back to time and time again.

Praise in Jesus' name. So before we dive in to God's faithfulness, what is the opposite of faithfulness?

What's the opposite of faithfulness?

Usually when you give a definition, you can't use the word in the definition, right? So you can't say

unfaithfulness.

Right, right. When you say unfaithfulness, what comes to mind?

Unfaithfulness.

I would say one word would be separation.

Okay.

Also one of those words where I feel like no one really, like, you never really think about

the definition, right? You just know what it is. But unfaithfulness or, again, lack of faithfulness,

I would say, you know, a loss of trust.

Leads to a loss of trust, yeah. Someone you can't trust if they're unfaithful. Yeah.

Disloyalty.

Mm-hmm.

Betrayal.

Betrayal, disloyalty. Yes. Yes.

Comes to mind wishy-washy. Someone who says they're going to do something, but they never actually

do it.

Lukewarmness.

Lukewarmness, yes.

Yeah, so what, and the opposite of that, what is faithfulness? And the faithfulness in the Bible

is called steadfast love, right? The Hebrew word is hesed, which occurs 250 times in the Old Testament.

And hesed refers to an unwavering commitment. Just this idea of loyalty, right? It's a,

do you say, who said loyalty? You say loyalty? Yeah. A solemn oath that cannot be broken.

Unwavering in a commitment to do something. Promising something and being absolutely reliable.

So we can say a faithful friend is someone who sticks closer than a brother, right? Proverbs.

Someone who is reliable. Someone who you can depend upon each day. And Louis Burkhoff,

in his systematic theology, would describe God's faithfulness as follows. He is ever mindful

of his covenant and fulfills all the promises which he has made to his people. He continues,

this is the utmost practical significance of the people of God. Paraphrasing Burkhoff,

he says, it is the ground of our confidence, the foundation of our hope, the cause of our rejoicing,

our comfort when we are conscious of our own failures and shortcomings. Amen. God's faithfulness

is lifted up in the scripture in many places. He can be trusted. He can be relied upon.

He's unwavering in his commitment to his people. Five verses.

Let us hold fast to our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful.

Hebrews 10. Your faithfulness reaches to the skies. Your faithfulness continues through all generations.

Moses proclaims the faithful God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him

to a thousand generations. God's signature line. The Lord, the Lord, merciful and gracious,

abounding in steadfast love. Welcome, friends. We're talking about God's faithfulness.

And perhaps the highest proclamation of God's faithfulness, great is your faithfulness.

In Lamentations 3. The late David Powelson, a biblical counselor,

frequently pointed out that the last phrase was the most used line in the Bible.

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases. His mercies never come to an end.

And Powelson would say, if God thinks it's worth repeating that his steadfast love lasts forever,

then it's worth our repeating it too.

God's faithfulness goes the second mile.

But then it goes the third mile, and it goes the fourth mile.

And then you realize it never ends.

God's faithfulness continues and follows us, his people, throughout our lives.

And each day is an opportunity to experience that mercy.

So, are there examples in nature that remind you of God's faithfulness?

Examples in nature that remind you of his faithfulness.

Yes.

The sunrise.

We always have oxygen to breathe.

I've been lost in the woods, and I was grateful for Polaris one time.

What is Polaris?

Polaris is the North Star.

Oh.

That's a great example.

Yes.

Yeah.

Yes.

He's a North Star.

Amen.

He is as reliable as the sun coming up each morning.

I don't remember where I heard this, or even how accurate it is,

but there's some crazy statistics about, like,

just where the Earth is positioned in relation to the sun,

if it was even, like, 1% further or closer,

life wouldn't happen.

And if the tilt of the axis were off just a little bit,

and everything would cease to be,

and just wind and waves and tides,

and just all of it somehow working together,

quite improbably, but not so hard to believe,

we consider who put it together.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

I remember Jeff Stevens opened up,

uh,

uh,

on Sunday,

this is maybe a year or two ago,

we were talking about,

uh,

I think one of his kids had, like,

bruised, you know,

an elbow or something like that,

and, you know,

he just kind of talked about, like,

how we don't have to worry about,

like,

the skin naturally just taking care of that,

right?

The blood clots,

you know,

for most people,

obviously, right?

The blood clots,

the skin reforms,

um,

and I still remember that.

Mm-hmm.

You know,

we don't,

we don't have to think about it.

It just happens.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Um,

the point that I wanted to bring home in the class last week,

which I think I forgot to mention,

is that,

um,

uh,

you know,

just how secure we are when we move towards the Lord,

enter into his presence,

you know,

he's,

he's like,

uh,

a bird that shows great,

faithful,

regular love for,

uh,

his,

his offspring,

you know,

whenever they move close,

uh,

wrapped into God's presence and protection.

Hmm.

Yes.

It's a great,

it's a great image.

God caring for his little chicklets as a mother would.

I think for me,

I,

I always picture like the,

the,

the breakers,

the waves always coming in,

never ending on the beach.

When I'm on the beach,

I see that.

I just always reminds me of God's faithfulness.

It just never ends.

Always coming in.

And God's faithfulness is that for us.

Is he not?

As sure as the season's changing,

as sure as the spring coming in the winter,

like God is always faithful.

He's always reliable.

He is always,

can be relied upon in every season of life.

And I looked up some hymns that talked about God's faithfulness.

And here are just a few.

There can be a lot more.

Great is thy faithfulness.

How firm a foundation.

It is well with my soul.

He will hold me fast.

The solid rock,

amazing grace.

And I'm just kind of skimming the surface there.

But all these hymns,

I think we,

what we find precious about them is it reminds us of God's unwavering goodness towards us.

And what an encouragement these hymns have been to the people of God,

reminding us that he is the solid rock,

an anchor in the raging seas.

We sang this at our wedding,

the solid rock.

His oath,

his covenant,

his blood support me in the whelming flood.

When all around my soul gives way,

he then is all my hope in this day.

On Christ,

the solid rock,

I stand.

And he is the solid rock in the flood,

in the storm.

And so for our time today,

we intuitively understand what God's faithfulness is.

We'll look at three expressions of God's faithfulness in the scripture.

So three expressions,

and then we'll conclude with some application in our lives.

First,

God is faithful to keep his covenant promises.

And this is the context of God's faithfulness.

It has been said the two certainties in life are death and taxes.

The other certainty is God always,

he always keeps his promises.

And these promises often take the form of covenants.

So a covenant is a solemn promise.

This is when you pinky promise when you're a child.

You know,

a pinky promise,

I'm going to do it.

And when you're older,

you enter into other kinds of covenants.

You enter into the solemn covenant of marriage through marriage vows,

for better or worse,

for richer or poorer,

for sickness and in health.

A church covenant.

You promise to love and give gifts of love and service.

We break our vows,

but God never breaks his.

And God made a solemn covenant with Abraham in chapter 12.

So if you turn there,

Genesis 12,

Genesis 12:1–3

verses 1 to 3.

Would somebody mind reading that for us?

Genesis chapter 12,

Genesis 12:1–3

verses 1 to 3.

Thank you.

Now the Lord said to Abraham,

Go from your country and your kindred,

and your father's house to the land that I will show you.

And I will make of you a great nation.

And I will bless you,

and make the name great,

so that you will be a blessing.

I will bless those who bless you.

And him who dishonors you,

I will curse.

And in you,

all the families of the earth shall be blessed.

Amen.

Amen.

So the context,

God calls Abraham out of the land of Ur

and promises him blessing.

And three things in the Abrahamic covenant.

First is land in verse 1.

Numerous offspring in verse 2.

And then finally,

verse 3,

this offspring would be the source of blessing to all nations

through one of the seed that would come from Abraham.

And later on in Genesis 15,

God would tell Abraham that this,

his offspring would be as numerous as the stars of heaven.

And this is an eternal blessing.

Forgiven,

accepted,

sanctified,

glorified,

joy in the presence of God.

And in Genesis 12,

he's restoring what was lost in the garden.

God recreates the world.

Remember that promised seed that Genesis 3.15,

he will crush the head of the serpent.

That offspring is going to come through Abraham's line

and recreate what was lost.

in the garden.

And Abraham would be the progenitor of that offspring.

And then in chapter 15,

it says Abraham believed God's promise

and the Lord counts him,

reckons him as a righteous man.

As Romans 4 would tell us,

because of his faith in that promise,

he is accounted as righteous.

He lived his homeland,

his family,

everything he knew

and followed God to an unknown land

because he knew God was reliable.

But yet,

he believed God,

but he still seeks assurance.

Ten years

passes

since Genesis 12.

He is 75 years old

and he's still

childless.

He is doubting.

So Abraham is doubting.

He's wavering.

God,

you promised me ten years ago

that I would have an offspring

as numerous as the stars of heaven,

yet I don't even have a child.

He's getting older

and he's in an age where

it is almost impossible

to have children.

Where is this

promised seed

that you promised

to bless the nations?

And Abraham asked God

in Genesis 15,

Oh Lord God,

how may I know

that I will possess it?

God,

I need something more.

God,

I need

something

to assure me

that this promise,

you will keep it.

And God,

in his grace,

answers

that request.

Hebrews 6,

Hebrews 6:17

verse 17,

speaking about Abraham here,

says,

So when God desired

to show more convincingly

to the heirs of the promise

the unchangeable character

of his purpose,

he guaranteed it

with an oath.

He guaranteed it

with an oath.

God solemnly swears

an oath of allegiance

to fulfill his promise

to Abraham.

I mean,

he didn't have to do that,

right?

He could have just said,

Abraham,

stop asking so many questions.

Do what I tell you to do

and stop and just trust me.

God,

you're so wavering

in your faith.

What's wrong with you?

But God doesn't do that,

right?

He cares for Abraham's assurance

and he cares that you and I

have unshakable hope as well.

And if you're in Christ,

God is committed

to working for you.

He has made promises

in the scripture.

And if you turn there

to Genesis 15,

this oath that God takes

is in the form of a solemn ceremony

in Genesis 15,

Genesis 15:7–21

verse 7 to 21.

Morning.

A curious ceremony takes place

to seal that solemn promise,

a solemn oath that God takes.

Genesis 15.

And covenants

in the ancient Near East

were sometimes ratified

through a ceremony

in which animals were cut up

and the pieces

were arranged on the ground.

And that's what's happening

in Genesis 15,

Genesis 15:9–10

verses 9 to 10.

Abraham is called

to take a heifer,

a goat,

a ram,

and some birds

and cut them up.

The word for covenant

means to cut the covenants here.

So he's cutting them up

in that ancient

Near Eastern ceremony.

And the two parties

would walk

between the pieces

stigma,

a similar fate

would befall either of them

if either of them

broke their part

of the agreement.

They would be torn apart

like the animals

on the ground.

But something very interesting

happens in verse 12.

A deep sleep

fell on Abraham.

So God puts Abraham

to sleep

and it was only God

who walks

through the animal pieces

in a figure

of a smoking fire pot

and a flaming torch.

So God takes

Abraham's place

in that ceremony.

That's a dramatic moment

in the scripture.

What is this ceremony

intending to communicate?

Why would God put Abraham

to sleep

and then walk

through

the pieces?

The pieces.

Good morning.

Striking.

God not only takes

He not only walks

for Himself

He also walks

through for Abraham.

Is it a foreshadowing

of what Jesus

would do this?

Yes.

Yes.

In what way?

If you elaborate

a little more on that.

I'm not sure

but some of it

is that

in a covenant

to promise

to do something

it is not

assured that humans

that promise

to do something

are going to be pure

and the process

of that commitment

that God walks

in our place

and carries us

in some

substitutional way

then there's

an assurance

that

that covenant

will be maintained.

Yeah.

I'll just

bumble a little one.

Hey, I'm following.

Amen, brother.

Chris, help.

Olivia.

So Tyler,

I thought that this was

when God makes

the covenant

with Abraham

for land.

No?

Yeah, it's

Yeah, I know.

The 15 is a ceremony

for the covenant

he originally makes

in 12.

Chapter 12.

And in chapter 12

he promises land

offspring

and that

numerous offspring

and that this offspring

would bless

the entire world.

So this offspring

is sealing the promise

that God makes earlier

which includes land.

And in this,

in 15

he

says

you're going to have

an offspring

from your own body

you know,

not the servant

in your house

but

and

could somebody read

is like

verse 8 or so

to follow up

on the living

question

where

after

Abraham

sees the stars

you know,

God says

you're offering them

to be as numerous

as the stars

and Abraham

believes God

and it's counted

to him as righteousness.

But then I think

he asks another question

but I can't remember

what it is.

How can I know

I will gain possession

of it?

What was that?

How can I know

I will gain possession

of it?

So it is about

the land.

Yeah.

Is that right?

It's about

the

promise.

Like how can I know

it's the land

but it's also

the offspring

because he doesn't

have the offspring

he doesn't have

Isaac yet

and he's seeking

assurance

and God is

he solemnly

seals that

promise

through this covenant

and God is saying

I will keep my end

of the deal

and Abraham

if you fail

on your side

I will take on

myself

the curse

of breaking

the covenant.

Right?

So it's a

unilateral covenant

that God

I am going to do it

on both of our sides

and that's a

driving engine

that keeps the narrative

moving forward

in the Bible.

Will God keep

that promise?

I mean consider

God will keep

his side

and we know

that

but how can

he really

bless them

when his people

rebel against

him?

Right?

God must judge

the wicked

because he is

righteous

but he made

a promise

surely if he is

faithful he must

keep it

but how?

In Proverbs

it says

those who

justify the wicked

are an abomination

to God

so God

promises to

bless them

eternally bless

them

but yet

they are

rebellious

and God

doesn't just

seal our assurance

with oath

and covenants

but with blood

and the blood

as we said

is foreshadowing

the blood

of his own son

taking the curse

upon himself

to show his

faithfulness

he would

engrave the names

in the palms

of his hands

I love this

hymn from

Joseph Hart

view him

prostrate

in the garden

on the ground

your maker lies

on the bloody

tree

behold him

sinner

will not

this

suffice

lo the incarnate

God ascended

plead the merits

of his blood

venture on him

venture holy

let no other

trust

intrude

that's a hymn

come

you sinners

poor and needy

but we see

that God

is willing

to keep

that promise

where the maker

would take

on flesh

and prostrate

himself on the

ground

in order to

keep his

promises

and the

covenants

we did a study

last year

about all the

different covenants

and how they

relate to each

other

but the covenants

are like the

steel structure

of the skyscraper

that keep it

from collapsing

into judgments

in the same way

God's faithfulness

to those promises

his covenants

keep the plan

of redemption

from collapsing

into judgments

and there's a real

drama

in the doctrine

of God's faithfulness

consider the

exodus

exodus makes

this point

that the people

left Egypt

but they took

Egypt with them

in their hearts

the covenant

that God made

with Moses

was broken

before the ink

was even dry

is God really

going to be

faithful to

an adulterous

idolatrous

spouse

and you can

read about that

in the book

of Hosea

but God

there's

there's

there's a

tension there

right

there's a

tension

how is God

going to

keep that

promise

and I think

there's two

ways this is

often misunderstood

of God's

faithfulness

I think in our

selfie culture

we might be

tempted to think

yeah God is

faithful because

of me

I'm worth it

right

you know

he makes

promises

and he must

keep them

because he

made it

with me

and that's

the flavor

if you turn

on the TV

or some radio

station

everything God

does is because

I'm so worth it

right

but listen to how

Jeremiah pleads

for mercy

for God to keep

his covenant

promises

Jeremiah 14

Jeremiah 14:21

verse 21

do not

spurn us

for your

namesake

do not

dishonor

your

glorious

throne

remember

and do

not

break

your

covenant

with us

so that

Jeremiah

doesn't say

keep the

covenant

because we're

so awesome

he's pleading

for mercy

using God's

own name

do not

dishonor

your own

throne

God

by breaking

your promise

what a great

way to pray

pleading the

promises

back

to God

and if you

struggle in your

prayer life

consider following

Jeremiah's

example

and take

some promises

from the

Bible

and pleading

them back

to God

saying God

you have

promised

and pray

that

and God

keeps his

promises

but there's a

second way

this gets

twisted

and James

Montgomery

Boyce

a pastor

for many

years at

10th

Presbyterian

in Philadelphia

tells a story

of a young

man

who had

recently

committed

to Christ

he had

been involved

in sexual

sin

and he

desperately

wanted to

straighten his

life out

to experience

the true

blessings

of Christianity

unable to

shake it

he made a

white knuckle

commitment

that he

would stop

having sex

with his

girlfriends

and maybe

that would

bring about

the true

blessings

that he

expected

from being

a Christian

but it

didn't work

he actually

stopped

fornicating

having sex

but his

life was

still dry

it didn't

work

he actually

he thought

he had done

a great deal

in his

minds

he sacrificed

for God

but God

had not

responded

appropriately

to him

God

you have

not kept

your part

of the bargain

in his heart

he began

to accuse

God

God

I have

been faithful

yet you

have been

unfaithful

to me

God

you are

unjust

the fault

is at

your feet

in his heart

he thought

maybe God

is like

the wizard

of us

you pull

the curtain

back

and you

find that

God

really isn't

that great

after all

God

you say

you're

faithful

but you

really only

half heartily

love your

people

if you read

the minor

prophets

this is

exactly

the kind

of heart

situation

you'll find

the people

of Israel

had

especially

Malachi

does that

describe

you

so let me

ask this

question

what about

God's

faithfulness

does this

person

misunderstand

how would

you counsel

this person

who can

I sacrifice

for God

but God's

not doing

anything

for me

what does

this person

need to

hear

well first

it's not

it's not

a sacrifice

to stop

saying

you can't

claim that

that is

something

that you

can just

give to

God

because he

expects it

and requires

it already

and that's

there's a lot

more to it

than that

but that's

the starting

point

you can't

expect God

to be

grateful

for

you

you're not

doing any

doing him

any favors

simply by

doing

what he

commands

yeah

I'll probably

think that

what

the person

wanted

from God

is not

necessarily

what God

wants

for him

and then

also

the timing

of it

God has

his own

timing

and it's

not

immediate

necessarily

Abraham

waited

decades

yes

mm-hmm

like a

transactional

like I'm

doing something

so I'm

getting

something

in return

yeah

yeah

you see

that

and look

in Malachi

when the

people

tell God

we've done

our sacrifices

God

we've

we've

tithed

yet

you

are unjust

in how

you treated

us

and

those

people

you know

one of the

problems

is they're

self-righteous

right

and they

needed to

repent

immediately

and I

and I

think

yeah

that

that

there's

there's

idolatry

there

their motivations

for

why they're

sacrificing

in the first

place

they're not

really

living

as God

as their

ultimate

treasure

and that

leads us

to our

second

point

so the

first

point

was God

is faithful

to keep

his promises

but the

second

point

God

is faithful

to afflict

his people

now this

is counterintuitive

TV preachers

will tell you

otherwise

but this

is not

our best

life

now

first

comes

the cross

and then

the crown

we are not

exempt from

trials and

troubles

he is the

God of

the valleys

as well

as the hills

and we

know that

right

Psalm 23

God is

faithful

through

afflictions

not apart

from

afflictions

you know

God is

even

faithful

in causing

the affliction

in the first

place

he knocks

us down

so you

think about

the context

of the book

of Lamentations

we quoted

chapter 3

verse 21

is that great

verse

great is thy

faithfulness

but in the

context

there are just

teardrops

all over

the pages

of that

book

it's a

sorrowful

book

full of

anguish

and the

author

recognizes

that God

was behind

it all

the writer

in chapter

1 before

chapter 3

would say

in verse 4

the Lord

has afflicted

Jerusalem

for the

multitude

of her

transgressions

verse 11

if there is

any sorrow

like my sorrow

which was

brought upon

me

which the

Lord

inflicted

on the

day

of his

fierce

anger

verse 17

he has

carried out

his word

which he

commanded

long ago

he has

thrown down

without pity

the Lord

has commanded

against Jacob

that his

neighbors

should be

his foes

but in

verse 18

in chapter 1

is very

important

the writer

says

the Lord

is in the

right

for I

have rebelled

against

his word

so he

acknowledges

that whatever

we're getting

we deserve

God is not

unjust

in 1st

Samuel

Eli

the priest

was a

wicked

man

because

it says

he knew

his sons

were evil

and did

nothing

to stop

them

he never

disciplined

them

he never

afflicted

them

in

faithfulness

but God

is not

like that

he chastises

and afflicts

those whom

he loves

Psalm 119

Psalms 119:75

verse 75

I know

O Lord

that your

rules are

righteous

and that

in

faithfulness

you have

afflicted

me

in

faithfulness

you have

afflicted

me

so the

psalmist

knew the

afflictions

were not

they're not

happened by

chance

but because

in God's

wisdom

he wanted

them to

be so

the

psalmist

knew there

is a

purpose

behind it

all

he saw

divine

providence

in his

afflictions

well to

what end

Psalm 119

would say

it is good

for me

that I

was afflicted

why

that I

might

learn

your

statutes

before

I was

afflicted

I went

astray

but now

I have

kept

your

word

Thomas

Watson

in his

body

of

divinity

says

the

trials

and

sufferings

of the

godly

are to

refine

and purify

them

God's

furnace

is in

Zion

is it

any

injustice

in God

to put

his

gold

into

the

furnace

to

purify

it

is

any

injustice

in

God

by

afflicting

his

people

to

make

them

partakers

of

his

holiness

what

more

proclaims

God's

faithfulness

than to

take such

a course

with

them

as

God

imposes

causes

for his

people

are for

their

good

now

granted

our

definition

of

good

and

God's

definition

of

good

might

not

be

the

same

but

in

God's

economy

the

weaker

we

are

the

more

we

rely

on

him

there's

truth

in

this

statement

God

is

all

you

need

when

God

is

all

you

have

and

sometimes

God

will

knock

us

down

when

all

we

have

is

God

for

us

to

realize

God

Job

Job 5:17

5

verse

17

blessed

is

the

one

whom

God

reproves

therefore

do

not

despise

the

discipline

of

the

almighty

and

I

love

to

hear

a

time

in

your

life

when

in

your

weakness

God

demonstrated

his

faithfulness

to

you

weakness

sets

the

stage

for

God's

faithfulness

to

really

display

itself

there

was

a

time

in

my

life

when

backpacking

became

an

idol

for

me

and

I

was

in

the

middle

of

a

trip

with

the

family

out

of

Colorado

and

the

high

point

of

my

trip

was

on

Long's

Peak

the

highest

peak

in

Lucky

Mount

National

Park

and

things

were

not

working

out

for

that

to

happen

and

you

know

I

pushed

God

aside

and put

backpacking

on

a

terrible

weak

point

in my

life

and

God

got

my

attention

in

my

weakness

and

said

look

Matt

what

you

are

doing

here

and

I

didn't

climb

Long's

Peak

but

my

appreciation

of the

Lord

got

wonderfully

renewed

to

that

miserable

experience

that's a

great

example

thank you

brother

my

first year

of teaching

and subsequent

being

let go

from teaching

was a

very low

point

and then

that

really

drove me

into

seeking

God

specifically

in

my church

at the

time

and

it

brought

about

a lot

of

blessings

by being

brought low

and by

relying on

God's

people

because I

was not

strong or

wise enough

to understand

the context

of what I

was doing

here

for

long

I guess

I can

share a

little bit

I've always

wanted to

sing

but then

I

had a lot

of

health

problems

and a lot

of

family

issues

I just

couldn't

for a

really long

time

10-15

years

but God

has really

shown himself

to be

faithful

to me

throughout

this healing

process

it's a

journey

so I'm

still on

the line

up

but I

think to me

that's one

of the

biggest signs

of the

faith

almost

to me

we thank

God for

it

thank you

anybody else

share

I

wanted to

do

like

a

really

like

awful

like

friendship

friend group

like

five

situations

like

two years

ago

and that

sort of

exploded

and

that sort

of led

me

like

shame

brokenness

so

I

feel

like

spiritual

group

in a lot

of ways

but that

was also

like

when I

started

songwriting

and

like

learning how

to play

guitar

and God

brought me

some tune

and just

playing the

town

with my

guitar

in the

morning

and

that's

the biggest

part of my

life

couple

years ago

during

COVID

2020

that is

I

remember

you know

I mean

look for

it

changed

all of

our

worlds

obviously

and you

know

work

and personal

I

was

I was

struggling

with work

I just

I wasn't

happy

and

you might

remember

the story

but

a couple

people came

to me

internally

and said

hey

you should

talk to

this guy

long story

kind of

short

we were

doing

like

you know

kind of

an interview

if you

will

virtually

obviously

and

I missed

his call

he missed

my call

we were playing

back and forth

and finally

I finally got him

on video

and he closes

his book

and he goes

oh sorry

it's like

6 o'clock

at the end

or whatever

he goes

sorry

you just caught

me preparing

for a lesson

tonight

I thought it

was work

related

and I was

like oh

do you want

me to

call you

back

he goes

oh

no

it's

all good

I just

run a

Ben's

Bible study

almost funny

looking back