Modesty of the Heart

All right, please take your copy of God's Word and turn to the book of 1 Timothy, chapter 2.

1 Timothy 2 · chapter mention

Once again, if you do pay attention to the bulletin, you notice in the liturgy, we are not going to be in the book of Mark.

But I will remind you that that's where we're at. We've been preaching together through the book of Mark.

We've come to the end of chapter 4.

And as a general habit, this is what we find to be the healthiest thing,

is to go through the Scriptures verse by verse, and that is our work right now in Mark.

However, we can become overly dogmatic about that kind of thing and make that somehow an idol.

And it's important at times to stop and address some things topically.

Now, just to be clear, for those of you who may not fully wrap your mind around what good expositional preaching is all about,

which I don't know that I would qualify myself as a good expositional preacher,

but expositional preaching takes, as its main point, the main point of the scriptural text.

We don't do things with the Scriptures to fit into our own opinion, our own methodologies,

but we simply look at what the Scriptures have to say about something.

And as we're moving verse by verse through Mark, we're looking at the life of Christ

and what it would say to us and to our living.

But we can also look at a topic and say, what does the Scripture have to say about this particular topic?

And so, this morning, I'm not very apt to do this, but this morning's sermon title is

Modesty of the Heart.

We'll begin reading in 1 Timothy 2, verse 8.

1 Timothy 2:8

Paul writes,

Join me in prayer.

Father, we do praise you for this day, and I praise you for all of the souls that are sitting here together in this room.

We recognize that they came here today by your providential word.

And therefore, Lord, you have something for us, each of us, in this day,

some way in which you intend to conform us in greater degrees to the image of your Son.

And so, I pray that you will bless the reading and the preaching of your word to that end.

Father, we need you for this.

I need you to be powerful in my preaching.

Everyone needs for you to be powerful in our hearing.

That by your Spirit, you will apply these truths to our hearts.

That you will make us into new creations.

And we pray this in Christ's precious, holy, high, lifted name.

Amen.

So, this morning we're going to talk about modesty.

And as you may assume, that's because it's beginning to warm up a little bit out there.

And as we have a church that has so many young people,

this is a particular issue that young people need to hear.

Modesty ultimately is an issue of the heart.

As all behavior is, it's very easy and we're often likely to talk about behavior modification.

Tell you how it is you should live.

And give you some practical steps for what that might look like.

And that is such a temptation here.

I so desperately want to make a list.

And a bunch of rules.

And tell you ladies what it looks like to be modest.

Say, do that.

And if you don't, I don't know.

There will be some consequence.

Right?

We're going to discipline you some way.

Right?

But that doesn't really get at the core of the issue.

And that is, it is an issue of the heart.

In Ezekiel chapter 36, beginning of verse 26, God says,

Ezekiel 36 · chapter mention

And I will give you a new heart and a new spirit I will put within you.

And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.

And I will put my spirit within you and cause you to walk in my statutes and be careful to obey my rules.

So as we talk this morning about modesty and what that looks like, we must remember that Paul was writing to Timothy,

who was an elder of Christian people, who was leading believers and was leading women who had hearts that were changed.

So the condition of their heart should be, necessitates some outward expression.

An appropriate outward expression.

An outward expression that honors the gospel of Jesus Christ rather than profanes it.

An outward expression that ordains, that lays good works on the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Ephesians 2.10, Paul says,

Now, this is a little bit, potentially, a little bit of a touchy topic.

And I hope that most of you ladies in the room have already sighed a big sigh of relief.

And have said, yes, a sermon on modesty.

That is great.

That is something that our culture needs to hear.

I hope that none of you have gotten really uptight and are feeling uncomfortable this morning.

I want to speak to you plainly this morning.

And I want to speak to you pastorally as one who loves you and cares about you.

Cares about what's going on in your life and about the things that you're doing that may bring judgment on you one day.

It's a great fear of mine.

And it has been all week as I've been considering exactly how to say some things.

And what should and what shouldn't be said.

It's a great fear of mine to embarrass any of you.

I think.

I want to at least believe that anyone here who doesn't quite understand what it means to be modest has done so out of ignorance.

And I don't want to embarrass you because you're ignorant.

If I say something this morning that applies to you and makes you want to sink in your seat and sneak out of here as soon as we get back up to sing, please don't.

You have a past this morning.

We will assume ignorance on your part this morning.

And never again from here on out.

But this morning, you can be ignorant of why it is you should be modest and how it is that that serves the church.

So please don't let me embarrass you.

I really, really, really don't want to do that.

Sam has coined a little phrase for me and she calls it my stomp hug method.

Where I step on people's toes and I give them a quick hug before they can get away.

Please hear me now hugging you.

Please hear me now hugging you.

Not bringing condemnation down on you.

If I thought anybody in this room intentionally dressed immodestly, was intentionally trying to cause the men in our church to sin, was really working at that, I would have no problem laying it out for you.

But I don't think that's the case in our church.

Ladies, let me encourage you to apply this truth to your own heart.

To not sit in judgment of other people around you, but to apply this truth to your own heart.

And then in turn, in speaking the truth in love, to apply it to the hearts of others.

Let me caution you against legalism.

Legalism.

Proper Christian encouragement says to people, I want you to look more like Christ.

Legalism says, I want you to look more like me.

Don't do that.

Don't fall into that trap this morning as we talk about these very practical matters.

Now ladies, as I speak to you and potentially in your ignorance, I say to you that there is not a man in this world.

And certainly not a man in this room that does not battle with the temptation of the flesh of sexual lust.

Not a man in this world that doesn't deal with that temptation.

Now there are men in this world that fight quite well against it.

And I don't mean this as a huge boast to myself, but I have been fighting that battle for two decades now.

A little over two decades now.

I have been battling against sexual sin in my life.

And I find massive victory in this by the grace of God.

Massive amounts of victory in this.

But as you get to know me, you'll learn that I hate the beach.

I hate the beach.

To me, to go to a place that's hot, that has no sun, makes no, I mean no shade, makes no sense.

A place where I have to manufacture my own shade or buy it at Walmart makes no sense to me.

I try not to be, but I'm a bit of a control freak.

And I cannot control where sand goes when I'm at the beach.

And it just absolutely drives me crazy.

But let me tell you the primary reason I do not like going to the beach.

It's not relaxing to my soul to go to the beach.

I don't get to rest when I go to the beach.

I've got to be on my game when I go to the beach.

I've got to arm up.

And I've got armor.

And I know how to wield my sword.

I know how to fight the fight.

I just don't want to fight when I'm on vacation.

I want to go someplace where I can relax and be calm a little bit.

I don't want to get up in the morning and go, it's battle time.

Let's go play with the kids at the beach.

I don't want to.

Somebody suggested to me this week, they said,

couldn't you just bury your head in a book when you're at the beach?

And I said, not with toddlers.

This last year, Judah wanted to walk up to people laying down on the beach and say, hi.

And you had to go, come on, Judah.

Come with me.

It doesn't quite work that way.

Ladies, you need to understand that this is something that all men battle with.

And we live in a culture that is highly sexualized.

Highly.

It is everywhere.

Men are asking most of the time for these things to be in front of them,

for these images to be presented to them.

It's in magazines.

It's in our Facebook feeds.

I can't believe some of the advertisements that are showing on Facebook now.

I may just have to stop using it altogether because it's just horrible.

The shows that we watch, the casual nature of sex and the presentation of women in our culture

is there all the time.

You don't want to be a part of that problem.

Now hear me clearly.

Secondly, I am not this morning making men's sexual sin your fault.

Please, please hear that.

I'm not going to say it to you over and over again throughout this sermon.

It is not your fault.

Men have their own deal.

They have to deal with their own deal.

They will be held accountable for their own sin.

However, you could be sinning and contributing to that factor.

If I were single and had a roommate who was an alcoholic,

and I always had the fridge stocked full of cold beer,

and had a liquor cabinet full,

and offered to him on every occasion a drink,

would I not be somehow accountable for his sin when he fell back into his alcoholism?

Certainly, that would be true.

And so there's a negative feedback loop that we find in our society.

Men struggle with this.

Women want to be accepted.

This is big picture.

Culturally, women want to be accepted.

So they dress the way they perceive men want them to dress,

which causes men to sin,

which causes them to desire that,

which is this bad negative feedback loop.

And men, we really need to be the ones that are responsible

for getting that loop going the opposite way.

We need to be the ones saying to women,

I don't want to be attracted to you for that.

I want to be attracted to you for your mind,

and your heart, and your actions.

We need to be saying that to women.

We need to be saying it to them verbally.

We need to be saying it to them practically.

We need to be finding ways of showing them

that we don't want to see them dress immodestly.

Like, we've got to be working at that.

But ladies, help us do that.

Be part of that process of getting that feedback loop

to be a positive feedback loop,

where we are growing together in grace.

I want to read to you a short testimony

of a young guy in our church

that most of you love and respect,

a godly young man,

to just give you some idea

of what young people are dealing with these days.

He wrote,

When I walk on the college campus,

I must confess as a man

that each and every day is a battle.

If I do not spend sufficient time in prayer

and meditation on the word of God,

I find that I have already lost this battle,

the battle of lust.

I am so thankful that my father is faithful

to provide the grace to stand in purity

and to keep my heart from wandering from him.

I am truly thankful that he has created me

to be a man attracted to women.

However, when walking the college campus,

I enter into a spiritual war zone,

especially when the weather is warm.

I must constantly be on guard,

using every weapon at my disposal

to survive in the battle for purity.

Scripture memory, prayer, and music

aid me greatly.

I try to bounce my eyes

as not to gaze at immodestly dressed women,

yet it seems nearly impossible

to heed the apostles' exhortation

to flee sexual immorality

and youthful lusts

when around every corner

I find the same temptation.

There are certain days

I know my only option

is to look down at the ground.

When I see a girl immodestly dressed,

my heart breaks for her.

Little does she know

that in a campus setting,

she probably will be devoured

in the hearts and minds of many men.

Then again, perhaps she is aware.

I honestly don't know.

I truly think the majority of women

have no idea how serious

that battle against lust is

for every man, young and old.

It never, ever stops seeking

to turn us aside,

to draw us into its paths,

to count us amongst its victims,

to drag us down

to the chambers of death.

For the most part,

the church is a sanctuary

from this battle against lust.

Yet today, the struggle

is slowly becoming

just as hard

in the congregation

of God's people.

The manner in which

some women dress at church

can cause major distractions

for a man.

I would dare say

that most girls

are ignorant concerning dress,

but some are not.

I plead with you

to embrace the truth

that you are a woman

created in the image of God

and beautiful apart

from what this world

would make of you.

Though my sin is my own

and I will be held

accountable to God for it,

I plead with women,

especially sisters in Christ,

to choose to aid their brothers

in this unending battle.

For the godly women

who refuse to dress

according to the pattern

of this world,

a thousand thank yous.

You have chosen to follow

in the beauty,

honor,

and dignity

of Sarah,

Ruth,

and Esther.

You have considered

serving,

caring,

and loving your brothers

of higher value

than what this wretched world

thinks of you.

You are the truly attractive women

in the eyes of a godly man,

and I am forever grateful for you.

Lastly,

I think it is right

to ask the forgiveness

on behalf of all men,

for we have failed

to treat you

with the honor

and respect you deserve

as those created

in the likeness

of our wonderful Creator.

The result has been

you dressing in a way

which appeals to the eyes

of sinful,

depraved men.

Change must start

with men

loving you

and treating you

with the dignity

you deserve.

Only then will your dress

reflect your love

and care for you

with sincerity,

your brother in Christ.

This is a very common issue.

Now,

to be very clear,

if all of you ladies

in this church

got it just right,

and many of you do,

to be sure,

men are still going to deal

with this temptation.

It's still going to be

on our college campus.

There's no doubt about it.

I was there the other day

visiting with some students,

and I'll address

a particular fashion

that's come about

and was just shocked.

Like,

oh,

poor guys.

Winter used to be so safe.

It used to be so easy

in the wintertime.

It's not really the case

anymore

on our college campuses.

So,

it's going to exist,

but you do not

want to be a contributor

to the issue.

You want to be a help to it.

You want to be

a service

to men.

Ladies,

you must know,

as I say,

that all of the men

in this room

deal with this,

that so many of them

deal with it so well.

I know a lot of the young men

in this room

very well,

and they fight,

and they fight well.

They really,

really want to be pure

in everything that they do.

They want to relate

to you appropriately,

so please,

please help them.

So,

back in our text,

we see,

beginning there

in verse 9,

that women should

adorn themselves

in respectable apparel

with modesty

and self-control.

And modesty

is an interesting word

we use in English

that in the Greek

has a bit more meaning

to it.

It carries the idea

of bashfulness,

right?

That you actually

would feel

that it's inappropriate

to expose yourself

to men,

right?

But it's a bashfulness

that has a regard

to others,

right?

That cares about

others seeing you

in a particular state.

The truth of it is,

you can dress however

you want to

when you're by yourself.

I don't care.

When you're all by room,

in your room,

all alone,

by yourself,

it really doesn't matter.

But when you go out

into the world,

you must consider

how it is that other

people are looking

at you.

And ladies,

I know you have

a culture that feeds

attention for the way

that you look,

right?

And you guys are all

beautiful girls,

especially the young ones

amongst you.

You're young,

which is what our

culture worships,

right?

You have the ability

to wear scanty clothes,

to not be modest.

But is that really

the attention

that you want?

Is that really

the attention

that you want?

If in your heart

you say yes,

then we have so many

things to talk about.

Let me say to you,

that is not the attention

that you want.

You do not want

the type of attention

that is fleeting,

right?

That objectifies you.

You want people

to care about

who you are

as a person,

to look at you

in the eyes.

What would be my

encouragement to you

is to dress in such

a way that people

want to look at you

in the face.

They want to look at you

in the eyes

when they're talking

to you.

So you're to be

dressed appropriately

with modesty

and with self-control.

And self-control here

just simply means

soundness of mind.

Be rational about this.

Think about what

you're wearing.

There's a particular

type of bug

called a

processionary

caterpillar.

We talked about

this in a community

group.

I thought it was a beetle.

It's a caterpillar.

A processionary

caterpillar.

And this caterpillar

will follow another

processionary caterpillar

to food.

And you can actually

get them to work

in a circle

where they get

head to tail,

head to tail,

head to tail,

and you can work

them around in a circle.

And they will go

around and around

and around and around

in a circle

looking for food,

following the person

in front of them

for food until they die.

Don't be a

processionary

caterpillar.

Operate with

soundness of mind.

Lift your head up.

Look around you.

Don't let this

culture lull you

to sleep and tell

you what's appropriate.

But look to the

scriptures.

Look to the church

and ask them

what is appropriate.

Function with

modesty

and with

self-control.

As I said to you

before,

I don't want to

embarrass anybody.

I don't want to

offend anybody

this morning.

So I'm going to

let the scriptures

do that for you.

Proverbs 11,

22.

I absolutely

love this

proverb.

Maybe even a

little less for its

application and just

for its brilliance.

Proverbs 11,

22 says,

Like a gold ring

in a pig's

snout is a

beautiful woman

without discretion.

Like a gold ring

in a pig's

snout is a

beautiful woman

without discretion.

The gold ring

here is

the beautiful

woman.

The gold ring

is a beautiful

woman.

It's something

to be treasured.

It's something

of great value.

And the

contrast here

is that

this type of

thing should

not belong

in a pig's

snout.

It does

not belong

there.

So the

implication is

that a

beautiful woman

necessarily

should operate

with discretion.

The pig's

snout is

the lack

of discretion.

See that

there.

And pigs

in this day

were not

in any way

attractive.

Some of you

might have

thought,

Oh,

but pot-bellied

pigs are so

incredibly cute

and adorable.

Now,

these would have

been like

our modern

hogs,

the kind of

hogs that

are down

south just

ravaging farms

and you can

kill them all

year long

and you want

to and they're

hairy and they're

disgusting.

They're pretty

good eating,

but this type

of a hog is

what would have

existed here.

Remember that

the Hebrew people

didn't eat pigs

and pigs

would be out

at the edge

of town

where refuse

was dumped

and they would

go through

the refuse.

These were

not attractive

animals.

This is not

where a beautiful

woman should

reside.

It should not

be as a gold

ring in a

pig's snout

at all.

It does not

belong there.

Now,

the exhortation

that he continues

with is that

women should be

adorned in

respectable apparel

with modest

self-control,

not with

braided hair

and gold

or pearls

or costly

attire.

Now,

we could get

ourselves into

a little bit

of trouble

with this,

can't we?

And I am

one who

takes the

word of God

as the word

of God

and I take

the word of

God literally

in its literary

forms.

And so we

have to wrestle

with this a

little bit.

What does

this mean

exactly to

us and to

our culture?

Should we

take it just

at its face

value and

say,

ladies,

do not

braid your

hair.

It's not

appropriate for

you to

braid your

hair.

It's not

appropriate for

you to wear

gold or

pearls or

costly attire.

I don't know

how we would

define that

exactly.

What I say to

you is no.

It's important

for us to

understand the

culture that

was being

spoken to here

and then pull

the reality

out for us.

What is being

taught to us?

Paul is saying

to Timothy

that women

should not

ever improve

the way they

look,

that they

should never

do any

dressing up

at all.

I would say

to you,

no.

But what you

need to

understand is

that the

way in which

these particular

characteristics

were true

at best

of the

wealthy,

these were

things that

wealthy would

have done,

at worst

of prostitutes.

So as the

early church

was finding

some liberty

in their

faith in

Christ,

they were

beginning to

do some

things that

they would

never have

done previously

as respected

parts of the

community,

as Jewish

adherents,

or as

just well-to-do,

normal,

good,

Gentile people.

They were

beginning to

say,

well,

we like the

way the

pretty women

dress.

We want to

look like

them.

We want to

put on the

airs that

we are

these

women,

whether that

would be

the wealthy

or those

whom the

whole culture

looked at

as the

epitome of

sexual desire.

And that's

what they

were doing.

That's what

the instruction

is against,

is to be

sure that

when people

see your

apparel,

they see

godliness,

not the

things of

the world.

Now,

specifically,

we're speaking

about modesty,

but ladies,

this is going

to affect a

lot of other

things that

you do

and ways

that you

think.

Now,

I'm not

going to be

legalistic at

this point.

I could come

up with

some for

you,

but I'm

just not.

I'm tempted

to,

but I'm

just not.

I'm not

going to

say anything.

I'm going

to let

this work

in your

own heart.

How is

it that

you make

yourself up

to look

more like

the world

and your

motivation in

that,

the heart

in it all,

is to

not look

godly?

Our culture

does a lot

of things

to epitomize

particular types

of people,

like celebrity.

You must

think about

this.

Peter wrote

in 1 Peter 3,

3 and 4,

do not let your

adorning be

external,

the braiding

of hair,

and the putting

on of gold

jewelry,

or the clothing

you wear.

See the same

cultural issue

happening there.

But let your

adorning be

the hidden

person of the

heart,

with the

imperishable

beauty of a

gentle and

quiet spirit,

which in

God's sight

is very

precious.

This is the

way you

should want

to adorn

yourself.

With respectable

apparel is

the terminology

used here.

With respectable

apparel.

And you must

think about

what that

looks like.

What does

respectable

apparel look

like?

And again,

it would be

so tempting

at this point.

In fact,

I found some

great resources

that were

checklists for

you.

Most schools

have dressings

code.

Most of you

probably went

to some

kind of a

high school

that had a

dress code

of some

sort.

I'm just

not willing

to make

laws where

the Bible

doesn't make

laws.

I'm just

not willing

to do it.

However,

we do need

to address a

few things to

give you an

idea of what

I may be

talking about.

And here's

the part where

I'm really

worried to

embarrass you.

Don't be.

Please don't

be embarrassed.

You're ignorant

this morning.

Tights or

leggings,

whatever you

want to call

them, ladies

are not

pants.

Hug.

They're not

pants.

And if in

your mind the

natural progression

from the

tightness of

your jeans is

that you might

as well, then

your jeans are

too tight too.

Right?

If you can't

comfortably sit

down in your

pants, you

need to wear

bigger pants.

Ladies, bikinis.

How did that

become culturally

acceptable?

How is that

something that

it seems that

everyone does?

Even people who

from the world's

terms shouldn't

possibly ever

be seen in a

bikini, they

would not wear

anything else at

the beach.

It's bizarre that

the culture really

says that you get

within an hour of

the beach and your

brain turns off.

And you begin to

think entirely

differently.

Right?

Would any of you

ever walk into

this building in

your underwear?

No.

Why is it okay in

a different context?

I don't understand.

I honestly do not

understand.

Right?

If it would be

normative to wear

something on top of

something that you're

wearing, you probably

should be wearing

something on top.

Tights would be an

example of that.

If it would be

normative to wear it

as an undergarment,

treat it as an

undergarment and wear

something else.

on top of it.

Ladies, Facebook is

a dangerous medium

both for you and

for men.

When you go to the

beach and you make

your pose, your cute

little picture in your

bikini, you know it

ends up on a place

where everyone can

see it.

And sometimes, more

often than not, when

they didn't choose to

see it.

Right?

It shows up there in

the feed and that

image is imprinted in

a guy's mind and he's

got to deal with it and

he's got to wrestle

with it.

He's got to go to

battle because you

thought it'd be cute to

post a picture like

that.

Or your friend did.

Right?

You need to really

think about what you

wear everywhere that you

go.

Now, clearly, also none

of you would walk into

this room in a modest

one-piece bathing suit.

That would also be very

strange.

I think there is

appropriate swimwear

that you can wear.

And I would encourage

you ladies to be the

unique ones amongst your

groups of friends that

finds the cute,

appropriate swimwear.

And there are companies

out there doing this

now.

Right?

That you can be the

most adorable one on the

beach and be very

covered.

Right?

And I would encourage

you to do that.

You may not be able to

keep up with the latest

trend if you desire to be

godly.

You may not be able to

fit in with the crowd if

you desire to be godly.

Is this shocking to you?

That God has sanctified

you, He's taken you, and

He's set you apart from

the world to serve Him and

His ways, and you may not

be able to fit in in every

way?

Right?

That your pants may not be

as tight?

That you may be the one on

the beach in the one-piece?

The modest one-piece?

There are some horrible

one-pieces as well.

Right?

Is this a surprise to you?

It shouldn't be.

It shouldn't be.

And it shouldn't be

heartbreaking to you.

It shouldn't hurt you in

any way whatsoever to say,

I would gladly give up

that.

To serve my Lord?

No problem.

Right?

That's easy.

Right?

That is low cost.

Right?

To be a servant of the

Most High God.

He's called us to much

higher costs than that.

Right?

He's called us to suffer

for His sake.

To potentially lay your

life down for His sake.

To be martyred one day?

Don't wrestle over

swimwear with Him.

Be modest.

Serve your brothers.

Right?

How can you possibly know

what is and isn't

appropriate?

Right?

Nathan, give us the list.

Just give me the list.

I'm not giving you the list.

But what you can do

is you can ask your fathers.

Many of you have

godly fathers.

And even if they're not

godly fathers,

they probably know

the way men's minds work.

And you could say to your

dad,

Dad,

is this appropriate?

The little ones do it.

If I ever have daughters,

oh,

I can guarantee they're

going to get screened

before they go out of the

house.

Right?

And I'll also check the

backpack to make sure

there's nothing stuffed

in the bottom of it.

Right?

Ask your fathers and be

willing to take something

back.

Right?

Go to the store and buy

something, bring it home,

show it to your dad,

and go,

okay, dad,

I'll take it back.

I will honor you in that

way because you're a man

and you understand men.

And I don't want to be

consumed in the minds

and hearts of men.

Ask the women of your

church.

If this is your church,

we have many godly women

in our church that dress

very modestly.

Do that.

Talk to those women.

Ask them,

is this appropriate?

I'm feeling a little on the

edge here.

What do you think?

Right?

Ladies who are married,

ask your husbands.

I,

without ever talking to Sam

about it,

Sam has always asked me

about things she just

wasn't sure about.

Is this alright?

And you know what I'll tell

you,

that I really appreciate her

because she,

she really errs to the

side of caution.

And more often than not,

my response to that is,

yeah,

it's fine.

Like,

totally fine.

No big deal.

But on occasion,

I've said,

yeah,

I don't,

I wouldn't do it.

Right?

Ask.

Just ask.

It's such a simple

thing to do.

And when in doubt,

don't.

Just,

if you don't know,

you're standing in your

dorm room and you just

don't know if it's

appropriate.

You don't know if it's

going to serve your

brothers.

Just don't.

Just don't.

Caring for them matters

more than how cute you

might be.

Right?

Verse 10,

though,

is kind of the

continuation of the

beginning of 9.

Right?

What is it that you're

to be adorned with?

Respectable apparel.

Verse 10,

but with what is proper

for women who profess

godliness.

With good works.

So what should make

women attractive

to men?

Good works.

Guys,

that's the kind of

woman that you want.

Our cultural

definition of beauty,

so hear me carefully

here,

our cultural definition

of beauty,

we epitomize youth.

And guess what?

Your wives are going

to get old.

They're not going

to hold together

the way they held

together when they

were younger.

Speaking as a

spiritual man,

who loves my wife

for spiritual reasons,

she gets more

beautiful to me.

Right?

Physically and

spiritually,

she's increasing

in beauty

day by day.

But if you

epitomize

beauty the way

culture epitomizes

beauty,

you're going to be

disappointed one day.

Someday,

you'll wake up

to an older woman

who'll be laying

next to you

and you'll say,

that is not the

woman that I married,

if that is what

you care about.

Do not care about that.

Look for women

who profess godliness

and adorn that

with good works.

Proverbs 31.30,

speaking of our

famous Proverbs 31 woman,

says,

Charm is deceitful

and beauty is vain,

passing,

fleeting,

but a woman who

fears the Lord

is to be praised.

Ladies,

this is the way

you want to orient

yourself.

If guys don't

like that in you,

then they're not

worth your time.

Right?

If you have to

show off any

part of yourself,

any part of yourself

physically to a guy

for him to like you,

kick him to the curb.

And if you can't do it,

call me and I'll come

kick him to the curb

for you.

Right?

Not worth

your time.

You want a man

who is attracted

to godliness

as you should be

displaying godliness.

1 Corinthians 10.31

says,

So whether you eat

or drink

or whatever you do,

do all

to the glory of God.

This would include

the way

in which

we dress.

So it's important

that you see

that

part of the way

that you give

legitimacy

to the gospel message

is how you dress.

It includes

all so many things

about the way

we function in our life.

We've been talking

about that in Mark

Mark 4 · chapter mention

chapter 4

as we've been preaching

through that

about not hiding

our light

under our bed

but putting up

on a lampstand

where it's meant

to be seen.

We've been talking

about how we should

be sowing seed

in the world.

This is the activity

that's fitting Christians.

We should be

functioning in this way

and that includes

the way

that you dress.

A really classic

example of this

is 1 Corinthians

1 Corinthians 9:19–23

chapter 9

verse 19-23.

Now hear me

we have great

liberty in Christ.

That's one of the

great blessings

is that we are

no longer

under law

but under the spirit.

So we have been

given access

we've been granted

permission

to do things

like eat pork

would be a very

simple example

of that.

We're allowed

to do

some things

not all things

but some things

we're allowed to do

we've been given

liberty in Christ

but you can practice

your liberty

for yourself

or for service

to the kingdom.

Let me give you

an example

in my life

I find it

perfectly

permissible

by the scriptures

to consume alcohol

not to become

drunk

but to drink

but because of

my position

and because of

the culture

we live in

this hyper

Christianity

fairly legalistic

culture

that we live in

I choose not to

and I am

practicing my

liberty

in choosing

not to

as in no way

profanes the gospel

Christ has set me

free

I'm free to do it

but I'm also

free to not do it

I would encourage

the same

for all of you

not a law

but think about

where you live

and what you do

and how it is

that you serve

the kingdom of God

I would never

want anybody

in our culture

to not hear the gospel

from me

because they saw me

drink

it's just not worth

it to me

I don't care

1 Corinthians 9

beginning of verse 19

Paul says

for though I am

free from all

I have made myself

a servant to all

that I might win

more of them

to the Jews

I became as a Jew

in order to win Jews

to those under the law

I became as one

under the law

though not being

myself under the law

that I might win

those under the law

to those outside the law

I became as one

outside the law

not being outside

the law of God

but under the law

of Christ

that I might win

those outside the law

to the weak

I became weak

that I might win

the weak

I have become

all things

to all people

that by all means

I might save some

I do it all

for the sake

of the gospel

that I may share

with them

in its blessings

what do you

ultimately care about

in this world

right

do you care about

being cute

do you care about

fitting in

do you care about

attracting the wrong

type of attention

from guys

or do you care

about the kingdom

of God

do you care

about advancing

the good news

of Jesus Christ

and if you do

if your heart

is modest

it is going

to affect

the way you live

it's going to affect

the way

that you dress

Titus 2.10

Paul says

that good works

adorn

the doctrine

of God

our Savior

so how we dress

guys this applies

to you

my two year old

and my three year old

outclass some of you

guys on Sunday mornings

might not want that

to be the case

right

this applies to guys

as well

how we dress

matters

because

it's about the gospel

everything that we do

should adorn

the doctrine

of God

our Savior

now ladies

let me say to you again

it is the fault

of men

that men sin

sexually in their minds

it is their fault

but it is your fault

when you feed it

you will be judged

one day

for your actions

and it is my great prayer

for this church

as an odd group of people

we're fluctuating constantly

college students

I love you

you make our group weird

and that's okay

like I'm really content

being weird that way

you come and you go

many of you

and I look out at your faces

I've never even seen you

before this morning

that's okay with me

I'm glad that you're here

but we ebb and we flow

and we change

but I just don't care

what I want

Christ Family Church

to be known for

is being set apart

from this world

not for the sake

of being different

we're not trying to be

rebels against our church culture

that's not the intention

of what we're trying to do

but to be set apart

from the world

that we might magnify

Christ

in all

that we do

and that includes

the way

you ladies dress

let's pray together

let's pray together

let's pray together

let's pray together

let's pray together

let's pray together

let's pray together

let's pray together

let's pray together

let's pray together