Lifestyle Changes

In Ephesians chapter 4, Ephesians chapter 4 verse 25 through 29.

Ephesians 4 · chapter mention Ephesians 4:25–29

! I want you to follow along in your Bible as I read this passage, and then I would ask that you join me in prayer as we come together and ask the work of the Spirit of God in giving to us hearts that are attentive to us.

Intentive, humble, teachable.

Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another.

Be angry and do not sin.

Do not let the sun go down on your anger and give no opportunity to the devil.

Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may have something to share with anyone in need.

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouth, but only such as is good for building up as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

Let us pray.

Father God, this morning we need your help.

I need your help to preach the Scriptures accurately, and by your grace and your enabling to allow the Word to be applied practically.

Father God, this morning we need your help to pray.

That those who are here today and know the Lord Jesus Christ would have the Word of God form and shape the things they say and the things they think.

That all of us together would be better illustrations of the power of the cross and the power of salvation.

Father, we also pray for those who are here among us today that do not know Christ, who perhaps know of Him in an intellectual sense.

They know the facts or they've heard His name, but they do not have the sweet personal relationship that comes because of grace,

that first draws them to see the absolute moral bankruptcy of their soul, the darkness of their heart,

and then draws them to cry out and ask for salvation.

We pray, Father, that all that takes place this morning would cause us to grow in our affection for the Lord Jesus Christ.

And we ask this because of Him.

Amen.

Amen.

One of the lessons that I learned over the years in ministry is that conversion is really more than a set of rules.

The wonder and the power of God in transforming a person's life by conversion is something that is spectacular.

In fact, it tells us in the book of Luke that angels do what?

What do the angels do when a person is genuinely converted?

What do they do?

They get happy.

They rejoice.

I can't help but think back to the book of Job where it talks about the fact that as angels watched God in creation

and they saw Him forming the stars and all the miraculous things that He did,

they couldn't contain themselves.

They broke out in just absolute praise and worship as they saw the power of God at play.

And it tells us that when genuine conversion takes place in a person's life that it is in every sense as spectacular and wonderful an issue as creation was,

so you can understand that angels would rejoice.

What we're looking at actually this morning in Ephesians chapter 4 is a practical application to the matter of what conversion really is.

Ephesians 4 · chapter mention

Paul took three chapters to teach us the glory of God in conversion,

explaining to us the miraculous, the undeniable, amazing fact that He would take people who are dead in trespasses and sin,

miserably broken by Satan, and He would transform them.

And in chapter 4, 5, and 6, Paul then begins to lay out very carefully and thoughtfully a clear picture of what is so spectacular and evident about conversion.

The fact of the matter is, is that conversion changes us on the inside.

Isn't that right?

It says, if any man be in Christ Jesus, he is a new creator.

You're different.

And so it's practical and it's understandable that having made this argument for the unbelievable glory of God in salvation,

Paul then would take the time to explain what salvation actually produces in a person's life.

And we're looking at the practical application of, so if a person's converted, what really changes about them?

And we're going to be looking at several things here in the passage,

and we will work our way through it to kind of get a better understanding about what really is different about a person who really knows Christ.

Verse 25,

Therefore, having put away falsehood, and that idea of putting away falsehood kind of takes us back just a little bit to what we studied last week

where it talked about the fact that the believer puts off the old man and puts on the new man.

His past, his behavior from prior to his conversion, that's the old, that's the way he used to be.

Now he is something different, and he's in the process of putting on those characteristics that reflect the Lord Jesus Christ.

And so here is Paul, and he says, listen, we move from lying to being truthful.

Now you may wonder why Paul starts out with lying.

It isn't the first of the Ten Commandments.

It isn't the first with promise.

But here is Paul talking about the fact that conversion makes us radically different,

and he starts out dealing with the matter of lying.

And probably most of us are sitting here thinking to ourselves,

well, that's not the one I have the most problem with.

The truth of the matter is that lying is something that is far more pervasive than we may think.

In fact, let me rephrase this.

Lying is far more pervasive in your life than you think,

and lying is more pervasive in my life than I may think.

And so when the Spirit of God says to me,

Tim Kenoyer, you need to work at not lying,

you need to think very carefully, all right?

Well, that's good for them?

No, no, no, it's also good for me.

And we need to think very carefully about what is actually involved in lying

and its application to our lives.

We understand about people lying.

You listen to the news.

Depending on which channel you go to,

what do you immediately think when you hear the news?

You're always thinking that they're giving their spin.

That's a very polite way of talking about manipulating the truth

for their particular side or their preference.

Isn't that right?

Have you ever heard the saying that statistics never lie,

but liars use statistics?

It's amazing how adept we can be at framing an argument

or forming the idea that we want to communicate

and then casting it out there and thinking,

well, Lee, we pulled that off.

I also get a chuckle out of those people

who in their brassy arrogance will make statements like this,

well, at least I never lie.

Have you ever heard anybody like that?

At least I never lie.

That person is a lie walking

because when they say I never lie,

what they're really saying is that I use the truth

to manipulate the situation to serve myself.

And when I dump on you or when I smack you like I do

and I kind of hide behind that argument of,

hey, at least I never lie, I'm all about me.

And my dark, nasty little heart is taking advantage

of using a portion of the truth to use it to my advantage.

Well, I want to stop and ask ourselves the question,

why does Paul start with lying?

I want you to think here just for a moment

and understand this truth.

Our mouth is the primary advertisement of our character.

Our mouth is the primary advertisement of our character.

And Paul puts what comes out of our mouth

as the first thing on the list of things

that are to be different

because we've been converted by the cross.

Paul wants us to understand

that what comes out of the mouth of the believer,

listen to me carefully,

is to be different.

Isn't that right?

So what happened after you got saved?

Well, I started speaking differently.

Right?

If God has the power to save,

should He make a change in your tongue?

And the answer from all of God's people is,

you betcha.

In fact, if there is no evidence of a change

from what is happening on your tongue,

you better go back and ask the Father,

what's going on here?

Now, am I suggesting that all of it changes immediately?

And what is the answer?

No.

But here's the truth.

There should be a difference

in what comes out of your mouth.

A lying Christian,

I want you to understand this,

insults the Father

and raises a question of pedigree.

A lying Christian

insults the Father

and raises a question of pedigree.

Now, why would I say pedigree?

Because here's the deal.

Jesus, when He was speaking about Satan,

He said,

Satan is the...

What?

Does anybody remember?

He is the father of lies,

and it goes on to say this,

and He really speaks according to His character.

Satan just lies because that's who he is.

He's a liar.

And when he opens his mouth,

guess what comes out?

Just the standard old thing.

It's a lie.

As a side note,

don't go huffing and puffing out of here

deciding that what you're going to do

is be unkind and brutal with your truth

and then hide behind the fact

that you're not a person who lies anymore.

I want to remind you of what it says in verse 15.

It says this,

Rather speaking the truth in what?

In love.

We're to speak the truth in love.

Now, we do come to a very interesting statement

in this matter of lying

and the matter of speaking the truth

because we recognize here

that wholesome body life

depends on loving truthfulness.

Mark what it says in verse 25.

Put away lying, falsehood.

Let each of you speak truth with his what?

His neighbor.

Neighbor isn't close enough

and he says this,

For we are members one of another.

There is a far greater connectedness

in the thinking of the apostle

than most of us

when it comes to the matter

of the way we speak to each other.

As I was thinking about this

today,

earlier in the morning,

I was thinking of how

the physical body,

thankfully, in my case,

the brain kind of is all connected

and controls everything else,

but as a result of that interconnection,

my right hand and my left hand

have some moderate sensitivity

to one another

and they behave

according to that sensitivity.

Just imagine that the right hand

gets a little irritated

with something that the left hand does.

And so the right hand

picks up a hammer

and says,

Well, I'm going to be truthful with you

and since you messed up,

I'm going to just give you

a little gentle love tap

right there on the digit

so you get the memo

that this is not acceptable.

You know, it's a,

Ah!

What is going on?

Paul says,

Listen, think about this.

He says,

You are to be truthful

with one another

because you are connected.

One of the sadder things

that I have had to deal with,

one of the,

we're in the process,

we're searching for a family

youth pastor.

And I really didn't realize

how unusual it is

for pastors to stay.

Now,

I've had more men,

I can't believe you've stayed,

I can't believe you've stayed.

One of the things

that has been sad to me

is the number of times

I've seen people leave this church

and go somewhere else

because of some things

that others in the body

have said to them.

I remember sitting in a home

where an individual

brought something up

that had happened

and I asked the question,

When did this happen?

Because I had,

I'd only been here

like about 11 or 12 years

and this person said,

17 years ago.

And they were filled with,

with a,

an embittered spirit

at just bringing it up.

Well,

for one thing,

I thought to myself,

wow,

if,

if it bothered you

for 17 long years,

shame on you

for not dealing

with it biblically.

Now,

Paul says this,

he says,

listen,

when you speak to one another,

speak to one another

with respect

to your relationship

in the family of God.

Some of you know Kenoyers,

others of you don't,

but the Kenoyers

are fairly straightforward people

when it really comes

to within family dynamics,

but I'll tell you what,

we don't pull off

drive-by shootings

with each other.

And the reason we don't

pull off drive-by shootings

is because we know

we're going to be together

until they put one

or the other

in a pine box.

So I want you to mark

the focus of the Spirit

of God here.

Loving truthfulness

is a church life

and health thing.

That's what the Spirit

is saying here

at the moment

in verse 25.

So when was the last time

you thought about

telling the truth

with a quiet,

gentle spirit

because you had really

thought out

how does my being truthful

help the body?

Most of us tend to think

about using the truth

in a narrow perspective

of how it suits us

or our agenda.

What we want.

Let me spell out

several principles

to help you

with truthfulness

in the body.

First of all

would be start

with your own walk.

Matthew chapter 7

Matthew 7 · chapter mention

Jesus says,

hey, before you go

do brain surgery

on somebody else,

that's not the passage

but you understand

the point.

Matthew chapter 7

Matthew 7 · chapter mention

what do you deal with?

You deal with something

in your own eye

before you try to go

help somebody else.

In Galatians chapter 6

Galatians 6:1

verse 1 and 2

it says,

when you see someone

who's been overtaken

with a fault,

you who are spiritual

do what?

Restore such a one

with a spirit

of meekness.

Secondly,

really be about the body

not yourself.

How does this issue

that I'm addressing

have bearing

on the well-being

of the bride?

How does it relate

to the family

of God

that He has made me

to be part of?

Third,

don't be a drive-by shooter.

You know what I mean

by a drive-by shooter?

Well, I told him.

You know,

kind of,

it's like trick-or-treat.

You know,

you ring the doorbell

and leave.

And that's not

what Paul has in mind here

when he says,

let every man speak truth

with his neighbor.

He's not talking about

kind of an unkind

little broadside

in which you really

nail the person

to the wall

and all that

vituperative attitude

that's kind of built up

inside,

it kind of blows up

and everybody gets

fragged in the process.

That's not it.

I remind you also

of the fact

that when we speak

the truth,

we are to bring

the grace of Christ

and His Word

into play.

Let me make an appeal.

I want you to turn

in your Bibles.

I'm going to come back

to this passage again,

but this is a passage

that last week

just got a hold of me

in a fashion

that really has gripped me.

Isaiah chapter 50,

Isaiah 50:4

verse 4.

Isaiah,

here,

hey,

you want a verse

to memorize?

This one.

This one.

Isaiah 50,

verse,

go ahead and look at it.

It's not going to be

on the screen.

Is it, Connie?

It's not going to be

on the screen.

I didn't plan

for it to be on the screen.

So it's not going

to be on the screen.

You have to use

your own Bible.

If you don't have one,

there's one in the pew

in front of you,

or you can ask your name.

Go ahead,

grab the other person's Bible

and pull it over.

And it's like,

I'm Sharon.

I didn't know

we'd need a Bible

when we came.

Yeah, you do.

Okay.

Isaiah 50,

Isaiah 50:4

verse 4.

The Lord God

has given me

the tongue

of those who are taught

that I may know

how to sustain

with a word

him who is weary.

Morning by morning

he awakens me.

He awakens my ear

to hear

as those

who are taught.

Keep your finger

in this passage.

Turn over in your Bible,

if you would,

to John chapter 12.

John 12 · chapter mention

By the way,

the passage that

we have just looked at

in Isaiah

is a messianic passage.

That means that it has

direct application

to Christ.

But over in John chapter 12,

John 12:49

verse 49,

Jesus says something

that is rather interesting.

He says this,

For I have not spoken

on my own authority,

but the Father

who sent me

has himself

given me a commandment,

what to say

and what to speak.

Are you thinking with me?

Jesus says,

I'm not out here

freestyling

and saying what I think.

I am speaking

according

to what the Father

wants me to say.

How did that happen?

How did that happen?

If you look back

at the passage

in Isaiah chapter 50,

Isaiah 50 · chapter mention

Jesus says this.

This passage

was written of him.

God has given me

the tongue

of those

who are taught.

And when did I learn

what was the right thing

to say?

Morning by morning

he awakens.

He awakens

my ear

to hear

as those who are taught.

Listen to me.

Sidebar.

I shared this

in Sunday school,

but the truth

of the matter is

is that

the biggest problem

most of us have

with sin

is with our tongue.

Is that true?

Oh no,

I have a big problem

with murderous thoughts,

not with my tongue.

No,

that's not true.

James says this.

If you can handle

the tongue,

you're on top

of the game,

right?

Isn't that

free translation there?

Some of you

would tweak me afterwards.

My email,

send it to me.

But,

you know,

James says this.

If any man doesn't

offend with his tongue,

he's got it together.

I tell you what,

I have more verses

memorized on the tongue

than on any other part

of the spiritual walk

for Tim Kenoyard.

You know why?

Because I can say

some awful things

without practice.

Years ago,

it became evident to me

that my tongue

was not what it should be

and I began saying,

how do I change this?

I could be funny.

I could be sarcastic.

I could be critical.

I specialized in figuring out

what people's weak spots were

and when I wanted to,

I could bring those up

and I could cut them to shreds.

And I began memorizing

bunches of passages

of Scripture

about the tongue.

And when I read this passage

in Isaiah,

morning by morning,

he awakens me.

He awakens my ear.

Isaiah,

Ephesians rather,

five or four.

Let's look at a second thing

that Paul talks about.

He says here,

he says,

you're to speak truth

because we're neighbors,

but then he says,

be angry and do not sin.

So,

conversion moves us

from harmful anger

to godly response.

And some of you are thinking,

well, now we're coming

to a verse I can deal with.

Yeah,

get angry.

I've done that.

I put holes in drywall.

I put my foot through a door.

Now,

I'm not talking about

Tim Kenoyer,

but some of you

sitting there thinking,

yeah, yeah, yeah.

Go for it, pastor.

Preach that one.

Now,

here's the deal.

Anger is actually

more complex

than we might think.

It's a response

to a perceived offense

or threat.

Anger is really

a human emotion

and it's not

necessarily sinful.

Jesus was angry

on more than one occasion.

For one,

it tells us

that when he cleansed

the temple,

that made him angry

to see what people

were doing

to his father's house.

But another illustration

is over in Mark chapter 3

Mark 3 · chapter mention

when he looked at

the hardness

of the hearts

of the Pharisees

in the face

of his healing

and it says

he got angry with them.

Being angry

about some things

is essential

and necessary.

For example,

we should be angry

when God is offended.

We should be angry

when sin

raises its ugly head.

I did not watch

Miley Cyrus last week

and I did not click

on any of the videos

related to what happened.

but I was angered

by the incessant

twittering

and the incessant

conversation

about something

that was so vile

and so disgusting

to the Lord.

Now there's something else

that really should

get us going.

Are you listening?

We're fairly good

at getting angry

about other people's sin.

Do you follow that?

We're horrible

about getting angry

about our own.

And if you turn

in your Bible,

you're in Ephesians

Ephesians 5 · chapter mention

chapter 5,

just keep your finger

there because we're

coming back,

but go back

to a passage

in 2 Corinthians

2 Corinthians 7:9–11

chapter 7

verse 9 through 11.

By the way,

this is probably

one of those

go-to passages

when you're trying

to really figure out

am I serious

about changing?

Am I really serious

about my sin?

Or am I kind of

coasting through,

kind of playing

spiritual games?

I'm not really into this.

See, we're all

dealing with the problem

of indwelling sin.

We're dealing with

the battle in our own life.

2 Corinthians chapter 7

2 Corinthians 7 · chapter mention

describes the characteristics

of genuine repentance.

9 through 11.

Paul says this.

He says,

As for me,

I rejoice not because

you were grieved,

but because you were

grieved unto repenting.

For you felt a godly grief

so that you suffered

no loss through us.

For godly grief

produces a repentance

that leads to salvation

without regret,

whereas worldly grief

produces death.

See what earnestness

this godly grief

has produced in you,

but also what eagerness

to clear yourself,

what indignation.

Now,

who are you indignant with?

Yourself.

I cannot believe

that I have dishonored Christ.

I cannot believe

the offense

that my sin is

against the holy God.

I am appalled with that.

Well,

I do want you to understand

that while there are times

for us to be angry,

there are also times

where anger is wrong,

anger is wrong,

and it's sinful.

And such anger

has no place

in the believer's life.

Being all stirred up

about not getting your way,

being all in a turmoil

because of an offense

that you've endured

or a disappointment

or because someone

has done something

that was harmful to you,

you have to stop

and ask yourself,

and say,

what am I getting angry about,

really?

Is this something

that really at the heart

of it tweaks me

because I'm so supremely

concerned about

the glory of Christ

and the importance

of God

that that's why I'm upset?

No, no, no.

Most of the time

we're stomping around

and we've got a pout

on our face

because of us.

I do want you

to mark something else

in the passage

going back to 1 Corinthians.

It says,

don't let the sun

go down on your wrath.

Be angry and sin not.

Don't let the sun

go down on your wrath.

Well, that means

that if somebody

offends me,

I'd better get it settled

and take it out on them

by the end of the day.

That's not what it's saying.

It's saying this,

that neglecting

that which has been

perceived as an offense

will allow it to fester.

Things that fester

cause heartache.

So when something

is really bothering you,

there are a couple things

that I would encourage you

to do in relationship

to that.

For one,

deal with it.

Deal with it.

Deal with it now.

Deal with it in the context

in which it happened.

Now,

a preface to that

would be that

when you find yourself

all stirred up,

none of us struggle

with anger.

We're good Christians

and all that.

But when you see

somebody else stirred up,

you want to talk to them

and say,

take a minute,

take a deep breath,

pray a little bit

and say,

Lord,

is there anything

that I need to work on

in my life

before I go launch

and help somebody else?

Quiet yourself

before the Lord

and say,

hey,

I need help here

before I go do anything.

Sometimes it takes

a time of prayer

and some planning

before you go deal with it.

I have to tell you

that as a parent,

I would almost,

as I got older,

in my younger days,

I didn't practice

this as much,

but as I got older,

when my kids

would do something wrong,

I would send them upstairs.

I'd say,

I want you to go upstairs

and spend some time

thinking and praying.

Guess what I was doing?

I was doing that

because generally,

unfortunately,

I would probably

let it go a little too far

and then I would really

get irritated with the fact,

why didn't they just

listen to what I said

and if they were following

my instruction,

wouldn't I,

and I was right at,

I'm ready to deal with it

and I'd go upstairs

and pray myself

and then go take care of it.

Well,

when it says,

don't let the sun

go down on your wrath,

what do you do

when you can't really

deal with the problem?

How many of you

had people

who were your superiors

that did something wrong

and made you angry

and you knew

that it was going to be

a deal breaker,

a show stopper,

you're going to be

out the door

if you really went

and let them have it,

right?

Tried to solve the problem.

Sometimes there are things

we can't solve

and when we can't solve it,

God says it's His business.

Look in the Bible,

if you will,

just for a moment

over to a passage

in Romans chapter 12,

Romans 12 · chapter mention

Romans chapter 12,

Romans 12:19

verse 19.

This is one that you may want

to underline

and have somebody else memorize.

Beloved,

verse 19,

never avenge yourself.

See,

some of the times

when our anger gets cooked,

our anger will only be satisfied

once we really let them know

that they did wrong.

Oh, I'm sorry.

How can I,

you know,

that we want to solve the problem.

Sometimes you can't do that

and Paul says this,

hey, listen,

never go after revenge.

But leave it to the wrath of God

for it is written,

vengeance is mine,

I will repay,

saith the Lord.

Sometimes what we do

in that day

before the sun goes down,

we say,

God,

this is your problem.

I'm going to let you have it.

It's not my problem.

I'll go ahead

and talk about it a little bit.

I happen to think

that the NCAA

did not deal with

Johnny Manziel

the way they've dealt

with many other individuals

when it comes to

violating NCAA standards.

And I see some people

hyperventilating

on Facebook about it

and I thought to myself,

you know what?

Not worth the trouble

because here's the deal.

I happen to know

that Scripture says

God lifts up

the humble.

He does what

to the arrogant?

He deals with the proud.

So it's like,

God,

He's yours.

Oh, by the way,

there is one little prayer

to follow after with this.

Are you listening?

And be as merciful

to Him

as you've been to me.

Can you do that?

And be as merciful

to Him

as you've been with me.

Right?

Right?

We can say that.

Oh, Lord,

I'm handing this off

and I want these people

dealt with

like Sodom and Gomorrah

and I'm giving you 24.

Now,

what you do

is the last part

of the prayer

is part of the keeper.

It's like,

and Lord,

be as merciful

to Him

as you have been

to me.

Well,

this morning

what we've done

is we've talked about

the fact that

the believer's tongue

is different.

Amen?

Are you there yet?

No.

But when we realize

that our tongue

is not what it ought to be,

what do we do?

Here's what the believer does.

Number one,

the believer

is convicted

by the power of God

to say,

I'm not there yet.

Help me grow.

Amen?

I want to change.

I want to change.

I want to change.

It wouldn't be a bad idea

for you who are believers

to say to your husband

or your wife

as you're driving home

in the car,

so,

so,

how's my tongue doing?

Do you follow that?

I,

I,

go ahead.

Yeah.

Nudge him and say,

you can ask me.

Okay.

See,

the believer says,

I want to grow.

If the tongue

is the thing

that makes Jesus

look good,

bring it on.

Help me change.

change.

And if I've got

this problem

with

being all

stirred up,

Lord,

for me to stump

and stomp around

like a happy Christian

all lit

because of things

not going my way,

help me change.

Why?

Do you think

angels get excited

at junkyard war

type of

kludgy machines

being put together

out of trash

that kind of

flounder around

and don't look good?

No.

They,

they get excited

when they see

the dramatic

power of Christ

that can change

broken,

ruined sinners

and make them

something different.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

There's no reason

for you to be

bad advertisement

when you have

received the gift

of salvation

and you have

received the gift

of the indwelling

Spirit of God

who's there

to help you

be different.

Let's close

in prayer.

As the

baptismal

candidates come,

you pray for

their testimony

and for the

clarity of the

gospel this

morning.

Precious

Father,

make us

a people

who are

jealous

for the

glory

of Christ.

Pray for

Mrs.

Malumba

and for

Isaac

sake,

that their

testimonies

speak of

their faith

in the

Lord Jesus

Christ.

That those

who are

here that

know the

Lord Jesus

would have

hearts that

just rejoice

and those

who are

here who

need Christ

would be

drawn to

the cross.

We ask

this in

your precious

name.

Amen.