Sermon
Romans 7:7-25 - The Battle Within
Publisher transcript
Transcript
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That's Romans chapter 7, verses 7 through 25 on page 1133 of your church Bibles.
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What shall we say then? Is the law sinful? Certainly not. Nevertheless, I would not have known what sin was had it not been for the law.
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For I would not have known what coveting really was if the law had not said, you shall not covet.
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But sin, seizing the opportunity afforded by the commandment, produced in me every kind of coveting.
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For apart from the law, sin was dead. Once I was alive apart from the law, but when the commandment came, sin sprang to life and I died.
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I found that the very commandment that was intended to bring life actually brought death.
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For sin, seizing the opportunity afforded by the commandment, deceived me, and through the commandment put me to death.
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So then, the law is holy, and the commandment is holy, righteous, and good.
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Did that which is good then become death to me? By no means.
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Nevertheless, in order that sin might be recognized as sin, he used what is good to bring about my death,
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so that through the commandment, sin might become utterly sinful.
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We know that the law is spiritual, but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin.
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I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do, I do not do. For what I hate, I do.
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And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good.
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As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me.
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For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature.
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For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.
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For I do not know, I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do.
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This I keep on doing.
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Now, if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.
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So I find this law at work. Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me.
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For in my inner being I delight in God's law, but I see another law at work in me,
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waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me.
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What a wretched man I am.
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Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death?
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Thanks be to God who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord.
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So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God's law, but in my sinful nature a slave to the law of sin.
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This is the word of the Lord.
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Thank you, Dan, for reading for us.
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Before we make a sort of proper start, I kind of want to begin with an apology.
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I know that's probably not a great way to start a sermon, but I want to apologize.
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I'm not actually really going to cover verses 7 to 13 in the passage that Dan just read for us.
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You might look down at it now and you'll notice that it is kind of bookended by the repetition of the word nevertheless, right?
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Nevertheless is said in verse 7 and in verse 13.
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And in that sort of nevertheless section, Paul is asking a specific question that kind of addresses some of the things we were looking at last week.
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So he's basically saying, listen, if the law, as in the rules, won't make us holy, are the rules bad?
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Now, if I'd been a really smart pastor, I would have covered all of that material last week.
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But here's the news for you that I start with is I'm not really that smart.
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And so we're not actually going to cover those verses really in very much detail.
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My hope is that as Dan read them, you mostly understood them, that while the law is not able to make us holy, the law itself is good.
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The problem is not with the law.
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The problem is with us.
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And in the interest of time, I am going to not say anything else about verses 7 to 13.
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And you can ask me later if you want to.
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And we're going to zoom in on verses 14 to 25.
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And I'm going to pray as we look at those.
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Let's pray and ask for the Lord's help.
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Gracious God and loving Heavenly Father, thank you that despite our weakness, my weakness, still your word is powerful and effective.
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Amen.
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Sharper than a double-edged sword.
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Able to cut right into us and right through us and what we're thinking and feeling and perceiving.
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To teach us the truth of who you are and what you've done for us in the Lord Jesus.
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Lord, how we pray this morning that you might help us to be good listeners to your word.
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As we pray in Jesus' name.
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Amen.
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Amen.
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Now, the big idea in our passage this morning is that the hardest part of being a Christian is not the struggle that we have with the things outside in the world.
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You know, the biggest struggle for the Christian is not that people might tease you for being a Christian, that people might disrespect you or give you a hard time.
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That is difficult, but it's not the most difficult thing about being a Christian.
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Nor is the most difficult thing about being a Christian the struggles that might be in this room with one another that we might have.
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Again, it's hard, isn't it, when church is not running well or people in church don't behave as they should.
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But the point of the passage is that that itself is not the hardest thing about the Christian life.
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The battle for the Christian life is not an external one, but an internal one.
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The battle that the Christian faces is the battle with indwelling sin.
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That despite the best of our intentions, despite the privilege of having the Bible in our hands readily available to us,
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despite being in a vibrant church community and church family,
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despite having that great wealth of Christian resources at our fingertips on the internet,
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despite having friends who will challenge us and encourage us and pray for us,
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despite all those good Christian books that you have on your shelves at home,
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still we get angry.
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Still we're bitter.
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Still we lust after things that we should not have.
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Still we think more of ourselves than we should.
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Still we find ourselves gossiping and talking about others in ways that we shouldn't.
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Still we covet the success of others.
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We worship material success.
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We crave the next purchase.
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We imagine that comfort will bring us contentment or that material success will deliver us happiness.
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We even lie in our beds at night,
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imagining winning arguments that we feel like we lost during the day.
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In our idle moments, our thoughts don't wander to God and his goodness,
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but to trivial nonsense.
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We seek escape in the sort of endless, mindless banality of our phones.
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And there's no let up, right?
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If you speak to an honest Christian, honest Christians are hard to find, aren't they?
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But if you find one and you ask them,
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it doesn't matter whether you've been a Christian 10, 20, 30, 60, 70 years,
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the battle still rages.
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Augustine, the great African bishop writing in the fourth century,
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describes his Christian life as a struggle every day.
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Augustine was probably one of the greatest minds that ever lived.
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And that's how he described his Christian life.
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He talks about his inability to delete images of the past,
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or even to mourn for them properly.
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He says this,
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But for the present, I am a burden to myself.
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There is a struggle between joys over which I should be weeping
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and regrets at matters over which I ought to be rejoicing.
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And which side has the victory, I do not know.
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Alas, Lord, have mercy upon me, wretch that I am.
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Paul describes it.
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Verse 24 of chapter 7 in our passage this morning.
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What a wretched man I am.
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Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death?
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Now, I wonder if I can ask you, before we go any further,
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if you're willing to be that honest about your own Christian life.
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Do you know how Paul feels?
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How Augustine feels?
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I know I do.
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The longer I go on as a Christian,
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the more acutely I am aware that the fight for my Christian life
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is not with anybody else, but it's with me.
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It's in me.
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That whilst knowing the gospel is true,
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and understanding that God loves me,
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and he gave his son for me,
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still, as I think about my battle for holiness,
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I feel weak and wretched.
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You know, past sins that I thought I'd be well beyond by now.
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Unwanted thoughts, hard-heartedness,
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unkindness, thoughtlessness,
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the absence of generosity,
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those aren't imposed upon me from the outside,
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but they are in me,
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and come out from me.
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And if you're honest this morning,
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that's true of you too.
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And that's why Romans chapter 7,
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verses 14 to 25 are in our Bibles.
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Because they want us to understand why that is the case,
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and where to find hope in that situation.
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So let's think about this together.
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Firstly, let's think about the nature of the battle.
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The battle that we feel in our Christian lives
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is described by Paul as a war
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between what he describes as the inner man,
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the inner man who, according to verse 22,
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loves or delights in God's law,
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loves the expression of God's righteousness,
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loves to obey,
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the inner us that considers God's law as spiritual,
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in verse 14,
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this inner us that wants to do good,
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in verse 21,
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and then what he calls the flesh.
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Verse 14,
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our NIVs have weirdly translated it,
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I am unspiritual.
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Really it is literally,
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I'm in the flesh.
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The war is between the new inner man,
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the inner us,
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and this flesh.
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Sin living in me,
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he calls it in verse 17.
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The body of death,
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he calls it in verse 24.
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And these two realities
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inside the life of the Christian
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are at war with one another.
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New life by the spirit
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that agrees with God
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and wants to live for him
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and the old flesh
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that still loves to sin.
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Paul summarizes it,
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verse 22,
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for in my inner being,
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I delight in God's law,
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verse 23,
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but I see another law at work in me,
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waging war against the law of my mind
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and making me a prisoner
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of the law of sin
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at work within me.
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Let me say,
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this is such an important category
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for you to understand
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if you're a Christian this morning.
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That whilst if you're a Christian,
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you are born again,
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you've been given new life by the spirit,
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a life that is turned to God
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and trusted in him,
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has turned from its sin
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and longs to live for him.
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Though you are fully forgiven,
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justified,
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declared not guilty before the perfect God,
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you have that in lieu of judgment day
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even now,
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still,
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you will not be perfect in this life.
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You will never be perfect in this life.
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As long as you're alive in the flesh,
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you will still carry around
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an old sinful nature,
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a defeated sinful nature,
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yes,
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a dead sinful nature
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that's dead at the cross,
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yes,
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yes,
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the penalty and the moral debt
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that that nature owes
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has been written off in Christ,
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but you still carry it
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for now.
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So that,
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as Luther would say,
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of you,
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Martin Luther,
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the great reformer,
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would say,
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you are both a saint
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and a sinner.
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You are holy in Christ
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and you still fight temptation
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and the wickedness of your flesh.
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If you're not a Christian this morning,
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it's great you're here,
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we're really pleased
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you're with us this morning,
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welcome.
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This is not your battle,
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right?
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This is the Christian's battle,
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not the non-Christian's battle.
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Not because if you're not a Christian
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this morning,
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you don't have a moral conscience
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or feel bad about the things
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that you've done.
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No,
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rather because it is impossible,
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and Paul has said this
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over and over again,
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it is impossible for any of us
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in our own nature,
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by ourselves,
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to say that we delight in his law,
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right?
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By ourselves,
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without this new life
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by the Spirit
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that he gives
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as we turn to him,
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we will not delight in his law.
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If you're not a Christian,
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the law is a burden to you,
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right?
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The law is a problem.
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The law,
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the list of what God expects
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of you,
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is a burden to you.
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It's a list of your failures.
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It's like that for all of us.
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It's like a charge sheet
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against us.
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This is what we did not do.
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And we hate the law
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because it condemns us.
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So even if we're earnestly
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trying to obey God's moral law,
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even if you think,
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well,
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I'm trying to live
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with a clear conscience,
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I'm trying to be good,
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I'm trying to do to others
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as I'd have them do to me,
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let me tell you,
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that's not delighting
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in God's law
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as it's written here.
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That's using God's law
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for your own ends.
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And so the battle you face
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is a real battle,
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but it's not the one
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being described here.
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In fact,
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it's a worse battle
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because you're trying
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to use the law
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to earn God's favor
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and that is a battle
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that everybody loses.
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Our battle is that
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we delight in God's law,
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but still we fight
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an old nature.
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Now,
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there are some Christians
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and some preachers,
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especially on the internet,
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there are especially books
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that you might read
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which try to deny this battle.
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They'll tell you,
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oh,
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no,
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no,
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no,
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no,
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no,
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Paul,
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it's not describing
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the Christian life here.
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You're fully redeemed
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in Christ.
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Total freedom from sin,
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they'll tell you.
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If only you come
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and receive this particular blessing,
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you will escape
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that temptation to sin.
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If you come to this meeting,
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if you develop this habit,
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then you'll be free
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from the battle.
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Paul says,
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that is utter nonsense.
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The battle
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is the Christian life.
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And in a way,
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in a sort of paradoxical way,
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it is feeling
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and knowing
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and experiencing
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that battle
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in your heart
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which helps you know
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that you're a Christian
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because it means
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that God has made you alive
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and there is something
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to fight
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the sinful nature.
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So that's the nature
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of the battle.
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Next thing with me
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about the ferocity
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of the battle.
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Really,
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these are the same two points
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but I've split them up
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just so that you might remember them.
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And I don't want us
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to miss this
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or deal with it too quickly.
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Look at verse 15
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and notice how Paul
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describes this.
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I do not understand
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what I do.
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for what I want to do,
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I do not do.
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But what I hate,
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I do.
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Here it is then.
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The battle means
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that in an important sense,
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life for the Christian
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is mysteriously difficult.
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We don't understand
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what we do.
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We shock ourselves.
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We find ourselves
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capable of things
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we thought we would not
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be capable of.
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I thought I was well beyond that.
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I didn't think
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I would struggle with that.
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I've noticed
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that other people do
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but I didn't think
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that would be me.
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I can't imagine
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that I would still be bitter
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towards them
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so many years on.
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I can't imagine
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that I'd be so petty.
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But I'd be so committed
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to people pleasing
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that I'd be so insecure.
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I would have thought
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that that gossip
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wouldn't interest me anymore.
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I would have thought
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I would have forgotten
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those images by now
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but I haven't.
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And so there's a sort
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of insanity to this
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that our lives
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are not marked
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by perfect holiness
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but by surprising sin.
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So much so
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that we find ourselves
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doing the very things
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that we hate.
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Things maybe
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that others do to us
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and we hate them
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doing them to us
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and now we find ourselves
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doing the same things.
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But actually
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it's worse than that
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isn't it?
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It's not just
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that we do wrong things
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that we wish we wouldn't.
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Verse 19
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For I do not do
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the good I want to do
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but the evil I do not
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want to do
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this I keep on doing.
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This is what we were
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thinking about
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with the children
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isn't it?
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These are the sins
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of omission.
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Good things
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that we wanted to do
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that we find
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we don't do.
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You know
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I really didn't mean
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to stop reading
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my Bible.
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I really had intended
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to give more generously
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to gospel ministry.
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I really did want
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to be regular
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at church.
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I really did want
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to share the gospel
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with my colleagues
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before I left
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that place of work.
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I really did intend
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to send a word
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of encouragement
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to that Christian friend
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but the good
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I wanted to do
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I didn't do it.
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Now obviously
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Paul understands
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that this dynamic
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is a symptom
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of the war
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or the battle
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that he's in.
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It's important isn't it?
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It's not this
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new nature
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from the spirit
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that is sinning
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it's the old him
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that is not yet
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got rid of completely.
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Right?
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Look at verse 20
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he says
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now if what I do
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now Dan
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this is difficult
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isn't it?
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Right?
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It's harder to read
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this than you think.
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Now if
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I do
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what I do
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not want to do
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it's no longer
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I who do it
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but sin living in me
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that does it.
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Right?
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Now he's not meaning
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that as an excuse
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it's not like
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haha it wasn't really me
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it was sin living in me
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he's not saying it like that
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rather he's explaining
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the battle he's in
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the ferociousness of it
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where we find ourselves
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doing what deep down
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we don't want to do
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and not doing
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what we really do
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want to do
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as we carry around
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this sinful nature
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that's dead
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but still twitching.
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It's worth thinking
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about how this works out
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for us as Christians
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I don't know a lot
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about war
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I know there are some people
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in the room who do
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in God's kindness
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I've never had to fight
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in a war
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but I imagine
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that those
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in the most danger
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in a war
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are those who don't
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really realise
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they're in it
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right?
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Those who've lost
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concentration
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those who've forgotten
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that they're in a battle
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those who've let
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their guard down
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those who've turned up
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ill prepared
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what's the phrase
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like bringing a knife
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to a gunfight
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it's those people
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isn't it?
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And so it is
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in the Christian life
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and that's why
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Paul writes this passage
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he's not writing this
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to depress you
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or me
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to think that
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Christian living
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is a hopeless task
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he's going to go
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to great lengths
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to prove that
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Christian living
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is not a hopeless task
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we'll come to that
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in a bit
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and in weeks to come
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but the point here
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is to warn you
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to warn you
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and me
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that there is a
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ferocious battle
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inside of myself
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and I cannot
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just thoughtlessly
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live my life
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you know
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you're
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if you're a Christian
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you cannot just
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thoughtlessly
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follow your wants
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and your desires
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because your wants
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and your desires
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are the location
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of the battle
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that he describes
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if you carelessly
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follow what it is
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that you want to do
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you will find yourself
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in terrible places
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not every desire
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that you have
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will be a prompting
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of the spirit
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not every aspiration
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that you have
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will be a godly one
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not every dream
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that you wish for
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will be good
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if it happens
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because there's a battle
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going on
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and it's not out there
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it's in here
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and it's ferocious
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!
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Just think about
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how this cuts through
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naivety
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right?
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Think about it
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from two angles
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notice that Paul
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is essentially saying
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that you will
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surprise yourself
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I will surprise myself
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at what I am capable of
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even as a Christian
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now if I find myself
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ever thinking
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oh I wouldn't do that
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I'm in grave danger
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I'm the guy who forgot
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he was on a battlefield
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right?
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Or if I imagine
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that you know what
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I don't really need
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God's moral law
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I don't really need
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his moral instruction
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I don't really need
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the Bible to teach me
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what it is that God values
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because I can just
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kind of follow my instincts
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I kind of know
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what God wants
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uh uh
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no
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because that's where
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the battle is
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it will not be okay
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if we imagine
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that just because
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we're Christians
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all our ambitions
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will no longer be
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tainted by selfishness
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or that we won't be
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tempted to be unfaithful
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in our friendships
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or our marriages
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that we won't kind of
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lose it with our kids
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we're wrong
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if we don't understand
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that we'll be tempted
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not to do the things
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that would be
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spiritually best
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for us to do
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you know
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if you
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if you live your
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Christian life
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without imagining
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that your desire
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to attend church
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will always be
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equivalent to the amount
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that you should attend
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church in order to be
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spiritually healthy
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you are gravely mistaken
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because your desires
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will not match up
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it's the same with
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giving and speaking
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and praying
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we'll have good reasons
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won't we
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why we don't do
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those things
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you know it's true
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isn't it
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that our old nature
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although dead in Christ
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still twitches
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and has a really
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good lawyer
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right
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who's really good
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at persuading us
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that it's right
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when it's wrong
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and if we don't
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understand that
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we'll be hopelessly naive
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but the naivety works
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the other way around
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as well
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it means
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if you think
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if you're a Christian
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you think
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that other Christians
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will not let you down
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or that if they do
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let you down
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somehow the gospel
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is not true
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and really you should
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give up on the whole thing
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then you are
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hopelessly naive
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because this is
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every Christian's battle
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right
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Christians around you
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will sin against you
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and you will need
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to forgive them
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church leaders
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will let you down
-
church pastors
-
will be imperfect
-
perhaps imperfect
-
in ways that you
-
would be better
-
than they are
-
Christian friends
-
will gossip about you
-
Christian friends
-
will hurt you
-
be unkind to you
-
upset you
-
behave in ways
-
towards you
-
that you will
-
not believe
-
because they too
-
are in this battle
-
and sometimes
-
they find themselves
-
not doing the good
-
things that they
-
want to do
-
but doing the evil
-
things that they
-
wish they weren't
-
doing
-
because they're
-
in the battle
-
now this doesn't
-
mean of course
-
that we shouldn't
-
have high expectations
-
of one another
-
or that we should
-
live as if it
-
doesn't matter
-
of course it does
-
matter
-
there's great grief
-
in these words
-
isn't there
-
rather the point
-
is that you
-
shouldn't pretend
-
that this is not
-
the world that we
-
live in
-
we shouldn't
-
imagine that the
-
Lord's prayer
-
instructs us to
-
seek forgiveness
-
as we forgive
-
those who sin
-
against us
-
for no reason
-
because if we do
-
we'll spend much
-
of our life
-
sorely disappointed
-
and in grave
-
danger
-
you know if we
-
organize church
-
life as if our
-
members and our
-
leaders are not
-
tempted to sin
-
we're hopelessly
-
naive
-
over the years
-
I've had a number
-
of friends
-
who are
-
alcoholics
-
most of them
-
Christians
-
church members
-
one of them
-
a pastor
-
and what's
-
obvious is that
-
the most destructive
-
alcoholics are
-
those who will
-
not admit
-
that they've got
-
a problem with
-
alcohol
-
you know they
-
pretend they've
-
got it under
-
control
-
no no no
-
it's not really
-
an issue for
-
me
-
when really
-
they don't
-
but for those
-
who will admit
-
it
-
for them it
-
requires a level
-
of seriousness
-
having admitted
-
that this is
-
their struggle
-
it requires a
-
level of seriousness
-
to deal with it
-
doesn't it
-
we're not going
-
to have any
-
alcohol in the
-
house
-
I'm not going
-
to have the
-
first drink
-
I'm going to
-
be really honest
-
with my close
-
friends and my
-
family
-
well listen if
-
you're a Christian
-
this morning
-
you might not
-
be an alcoholic
-
but let me tell
-
you that you and
-
I in the flesh
-
are sinaholics
-
we are addicted
-
in the flesh
-
to selfish
-
rebellion
-
that the
-
inner us
-
the new life
-
by the spirit
-
absolutely hates
-
but it's still
-
there
-
and the most
-
dangerous Christian
-
is the Christian
-
who doesn't
-
recognize it
-
and the safest
-
Christian
-
is the one
-
who takes it
-
seriously
-
who is honest
-
about it
-
who deliberately
-
steers away
-
from the desires
-
of their hearts
-
who doubts
-
their gut
-
instincts
-
who is quick
-
to repent
-
when challenged
-
who doesn't
-
fake it
-
brush it under
-
the carpet
-
or keep people
-
at arm's length
-
church is at
-
their best
-
when people are
-
honest with one
-
another
-
forgiving each
-
other
-
where corporate
-
repentance
-
in the life
-
of the church
-
it's not
-
it's just that
-
thing that we
-
do right
-
that's kind
-
of you know
-
traditional
-
maybe
-
no repentance
-
is a moment
-
of honesty
-
in a world
-
of fakers
-
right
-
where people
-
around you
-
encourage you
-
to feed this
-
new inner man
-
and starve
-
the old sinful
-
nature of worldly
-
indulgence
-
let's finish
-
though
-
if it feels
-
a bit hopeless
-
let's finish
-
by looking at
-
the victory
-
in the battle
-
the victory
-
of the battle
-
look with me
-
at verses 24
-
and 25
-
let me read
-
them to you
-
as we finish
-
what a wretched
-
man I am
-
who will rescue
-
me from this
-
body that is
-
subject to death
-
thanks be to
-
God who delivers
-
me through
-
Jesus Christ
-
our Lord
-
notice then
-
that hope
-
hope for victory
-
is not in our
-
own strength
-
it's not that we
-
are different
-
from those who
-
have gone about
-
I know
-
I know that
-
other Christians
-
have this struggle
-
but I don't
-
really and I'm
-
going to be
-
victorious
-
it's not that
-
is it
-
no
-
the hope
-
is that
-
Jesus
-
delivers us
-
Jesus
-
will deliver
-
us in the
-
end
-
that is the
-
hope
-
that in
-
the present
-
strength
-
and future
-
victory
-
will be ours
-
in the Lord
-
Jesus Christ
-
so that we
-
fight the battle
-
not with our
-
own resources
-
not even
-
with the
-
resources
-
of the
-
law
-
for it
-
has none
-
to offer
-
but with
-
the resources
-
of the
-
grace
-
that is
-
ours
-
in the
-
Lord
-
Jesus
-
Christ
-
I
-
think about
-
this this
-
week
-
thinking
-
why
-
why do
-
some
-
Christians
-
resist
-
Romans 7
-
why do
-
we
-
why are we
-
tempted to
-
think this is
-
not really
-
what the
-
Christian life
-
is like
-
or should
-
be like
-
and I
-
think it's
-
because we
-
think that
-
really it
-
should be
-
easier
-
we imagine
-
don't we
-
well
-
the Lord
-
the Lord
-
could make
-
me perfect
-
couldn't he
-
surely the Lord
-
could liberate me
-
from this
-
particular struggle
-
surely the
-
Lord could
-
defeat all
-
my impulses
-
to selfishness
-
my temptations
-
to pride
-
surely my
-
addictions are
-
nothing to
-
God are they
-
why would he
-
make his
-
fight
-
can't be right
-
can he
-
if God
-
loved me
-
why would he
-
make me
-
fight like
-
that
-
interestingly
-
Augustine who
-
he started with
-
that fourth
-
century African
-
bishop
-
wrestled with
-
this question
-
in a book
-
called the
-
confessions
-
when Augustine
-
was a young
-
Christian he
-
read Romans
-
7 and
-
assumed that
-
this was
-
written about
-
someone who
-
wasn't a
-
Christian
-
later in his
-
Christian life
-
he came to
-
realise no
-
actually this
-
is written
-
about me
-
this is the
-
Christian life
-
and then he
-
was thinking
-
well why is
-
this the
-
Christian life
-
why would
-
God make
-
the Christian
-
life a
-
battle
-
well this
-
is the answer
-
that he came
-
up with
-
his answer
-
to the
-
question why
-
why make
-
it so
-
difficult
-
was joy
-
joy
-
might be
-
surprising to
-
you his
-
illustration
-
which I
-
don't think
-
scans very
-
well but
-
you might
-
imagine it
-
was that
-
the emperor
-
does not
-
have great
-
joy over
-
land that
-
already belongs
-
to him
-
but has
-
great joy
-
over land
-
he's conquered
-
right
-
his other
-
illustration
-
which is
-
perhaps easier
-
to connect
-
with is that
-
to enjoy a
-
great meal
-
and a fine
-
glass of
-
wine you
-
must first
-
be hungry
-
and thirsty
-
and so
-
he says
-
here
-
in order
-
to enjoy
-
the victory
-
of Jesus
-
we need
-
to be in
-
the battle
-
our ongoing
-
battle with
-
sin is
-
not meant
-
to ruin
-
us and
-
defeat us
-
and depress
-
us but
-
is meant
-
to be a
-
perpetual
-
reminder to
-
you and
-
me that
-
we need
-
Jesus
-
and Jesus
-
is brilliant
-
and he's
-
all sufficient
-
for me
-
and I
-
need to
-
keep
-
repenting
-
of my
-
sin and
-
turning to
-
him
-
because joy
-
and we
-
experience it
-
in part
-
now but
-
we'll
-
experience it
-
fully in
-
eternity
-
is that
-
Jesus is
-
victorious
-
that in
-
the ferocity
-
of the
-
battle there
-
is one
-
man who
-
stands tall
-
and that
-
man fights
-
for me
-
and his
-
name is
-
Jesus
-
so I
-
understand
-
when I
-
didn't lose
-
my temper
-
even when my
-
plans were
-
thwarted
-
and my
-
day came
-
crashing
-
down
-
that
-
patience
-
wasn't
-
my
-
patience
-
that was
-
the Lord
-
Jesus
-
at work
-
that was
-
his victory
-
you know
-
sound the
-
trumpets
-
wave the
-
flags
-
Jesus
-
won a
-
victory
-
in my
-
life
-
you know
-
when I
-
repented
-
to that
-
friend
-
against
-
whom
-
I
-
sinned
-
even
-
though
-
my
-
internal
-
lawyer
-
had
-
given
-
me
-
a
-
thousand
-
reasons
-
why
-
it
-
wasn't
-
really
-
my
-
fault
-
still
-
I
-
saw
-
my
-
sin
-
I
-
owned
-
it
-
I
-
said
-
sorry
-
for
-
it
-
that
-
was
-
Jesus
-
is
-
victory
-
sound
-
the
-
trumpets
-
wave
-
the
-
flags
-
victory
-
for
-
Jesus
-
you know
-
see I
-
came to
-
church
-
I
-
read my
-
bible
-
I
-
prayed
-
honesty
-
I
-
love
-
sincerely
-
I
-
gave
-
sacrificially
-
that
-
wasn't
-
me
-
that
-
was
-
victory
-
for
-
Jesus
-
wave
-
the
-
flag
-
sound
-
the
-
trumpets
-
he
-
is
-
great
-
he
-
is
-
my
-
victor
-
one
-
day
-
I
-
will
-
be
-
free
-
from
-
sin
-
free
-
from
-
the
-
love
-
of
-
sin
-
free
-
from
-
the
-
desire
-
to
-
sin
-
I
-
will
-
live
-
in the
-
presence
-
of
-
my
-
Lord
-
and
-
really
-
it
-
will
-
be
-
the
-
sweetness
-
of
-
the
-
victory
-
over
-
sin
-
that
-
I
-
will
-
rejoice
-
in
-
I
-
have
-
been
-
forgiven
-
I
-
have
-
conquered
-
in
-
Christ
-
I
-
came
-
through
-
the
-
battle
-
victorious
-
because
-
of
-
Jesus
-
and
-
the
-
scars
-
will
-
be
-
the
-
stories
-
of
-
victory
-
and
-
not
-
the
-
stories
-
of
-
defeat
-
let
-
me
-
pray
-
for
-
us
-
oh
-
heavenly
-
father
-
please
-
help us
-
in these
-
moments
-
now
-
not
-
to do
-
that
-
silly
-
thing
-
that
-
Christians
-
are so
-
good
-
at
-
doing
-
which
-
is
-
pretending
-
that
-
we're
-
better
-
than
-
we
-
really
-
are
-
but
-
help
-
us
-
now
-
in
-
these
-
moments
-
in
-
our
-
hearts
-
before
-
you
-
to
-
be
-
really
-
honest
-
we
-
are
-
in
-
the
-
midst
-
of
-
the
-
battle
-
and
-
the
-
battle
-
is
-
littered
-
with
-
stories
-
of
-
our
-
own
-
personal
-
failure
-
but
-
also
-
with
-
victories
-
for
-
the
-
Lord
-
Jesus
-
and
-
we
-
thank
-
you
-
that
-
though
-
now
-
we
-
find
-
ourselves
-
in
-
a
-
ferocious
-
battle
-
we
-
know
-
one
-
day
-
the
-
ultimate
-
victory
-
will
-
be
-
ours
-
in
-
him
-
so
-
keep
-
our
-
hearts
-
turned
-
to
-
Christ
-
keep
-
us
-
looking
-
to
-
him
-
trusting
-
repenting
-
to
-
you
-
and
-
to
-
one
-
another
-
and
-
enjoying
-
this
-
great
-
joy
-
in
-
the
-
gospel
-
of
-
the
-
Lord
-
Jesus
-
Christ
-
Amen